Behind Emerald Eyes
by morgana-avalon
Summary: Sequel to Interlude - Helm's Deep. Just when Thranduil has given up on finding love and resigned himself to fading, a new love enters his life.


Title: Behind Emerald Eyes

Author: Morgana  
Main pairings; Haldir/ Legolas, Thranduil/ surprise, Celeborn/surprise. See for other already established pairings LOML.

Rating: NC-17.  
Summary: Just when Thranduil has given up on finding love and resigned himself to fading, a new love enters his life.

Disclaimer: Not mine, Tolkien's. Hum, I guess Magolion is mine… And so is Remmen…  
Warning: mpreg, minor angst, child loss and the story is AU of course!  
Author's Note: Beta read by Sulien. All remaining mistakes are mine. FB is always welcome, but flames get send to Sauron!

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 1

"You have given birth to a perfectly healthy young boy," said Elrond, pleased that the delivery had gone so smoothly. Seeing his patient's longing expression, he placed the tiny baby into Legolas' welcoming arms.

Although the birthing process had exhausted him, Legolas was still alert enough to count his son's fingers and toes. Finally convinced that this little one had arrived with all parts attached, his eyes sought out his husband's. "That's number one," he commented, recalling Haldir saying that the silver-haired Elf wanted a large family, hopefully consisting of boys. "You are a father now."

Haldir's eyes released tears of joy when his fingertips lightly caressed his son's face.

Elrond, who had supervised the birth, had already cleaned the baby up, and the half-Elf now sat back, feeling mentally drained.

"Thank you for looking after Legolas during his pregnancy." Carefully, Haldir sat down on the side of the bed and gently maneuvered Legolas into a reclining position, so his husband could lean comfortably against him. Their son was in Legolas' arms, safe and warm.

"It is an honor to care for him," said Elrond, who was glad this ordeal was over. He still vividly remembered the day that Legolas and Haldir had come to him, asking for his guidance in this matter. Elrond and his advisors had just arrived in Minas Tirith and the preparations for his daughter's wedding were in full progress when Legolas had told him that he was pregnant with their first child.

Elrond's eyes had widened and he had collapsed onto a chair, staring at the silver-haired Elf in disbelief. At first he had inquired if Legolas was suffering from a head injury that would make him hallucinate, but the Woodland Elf had merely smiled back at him. Slowly, Legolas had reached for his hand and had placed the limb onto his no longer flat abdomen. Elrond's eyes had become impossibly big when feeling the slight distention. Looking at Legolas and Haldir now, he recalled part of the conversation they'd had back then…

_#"I never knew you could carry a child, Legolas," Elrond stared at the younger Elf in disbelief. He had never heard of such a thing! Surely, it was impossible!_

"_It happened the night Éomer came to our aid at Helm's Deep," revealed Legolas, reliving the frightening moments of Haldir falling to his knees – badly injured. They had thought the March Warden dead, but Haldir had clung to life and had escaped death by sheer determination. Having Legolas' love to fight for, Haldir had survived an injury that should have demanded his life. "That night we made love as I wanted a part of him to stay with me forever, should I ever lose him in battle."_

_Haldir pulled Legolas close, recalling the horrid memories of nearly entering the Halls of Waiting. "And I couldn't deny him."_

"_Legolas, explain this to me. Since when can males conceive?" Elrond found the strength to rise from his chair and studied Legolas closely, wondering what secrets the Woodland Elf was hiding. _

"_It is the way of my family. My grandfather gave birth to my father and Thranduil in turn had me." Legolas drew in a deep breath, knowing Elrond would find his next revelation either shocking or endearing. He hoped it would be the latter, or else the half-Elf would turn away from him in disgust. "I have both male and female parts. I conceived and I will carry my child to term, with or without your guidance. It would prefer with, but…"_

_Mouth agape, Elrond continued to stare at Legolas. "I never knew this was possible!" Neither Oropher nor Thranduil had ever hinted that they could have children. "And Thranduil gave birth to you?" He had a hard time reconciling his image of Thranduil with that of a pregnant Elf, carrying Legolas beneath his heart. _

"_It is the truth," said Haldir, "Legolas told me before we made love that first time. I was overjoyed, as I have always wanted a family of my own. And now we have started one."_

_Elrond took his time to consider their words. "And you want me to supervise your pregnancy, Legolas?" After seeing the silver-haired Elf nod, he added, "You won't be able to hide this for long. You will start to show."_

"_I could return home, but I would rather not travel in my current state," said Legolas, thoughtfully. "I would prefer to stay and have my child here."_

"_And I agree," said Haldir, "I don't want him on the road, endangering his life and the life of our child."_

_Elrond was finally beginning to accept the fact that Legolas would give birth in…"How many more moons until you deliver?" Pregnancy usually lasts one year, but he had no idea just how far along Legolas was._

"_In six moons," said Legolas in a warm tone. "Haldir and I will hold our firstborn in our arms in six moons if the Valar will allow it."_

_Elrond had finally had a chance to sort out his thoughts and smiled warmly. "I am honored that you would ask me to guide you in this. I accept, of course." He gently hugged Legolas and then congratulated Haldir on becoming a father shortly. "Does Aragorn know yet? _

_Legolas gulped. "No, I still need to tell him. He won't be pleased to learn I fought at his side whilst carrying my child in my womb."_

"_Tell him," said Elrond in a gentle tone. He will rejoice like I did."#_

"Elrond?" Haldir frowned, now that the Peredhel didn't react. "Elrond!"

Elrond startled from his musings and focused on Haldir. "Yes?" Looking at them, he found that Legolas had fallen asleep in Haldir's arms.

"I am worried." Haldir made sure their son was cradled safely in his parents' arms. "We sent several messengers to Mirkwood, pleading with Thranduil to join us here, yet he refuses to comply."

"Do you know why? Knowing what I do now, I find it hard to believe he wouldn't want to see his grandson." Elrond had learned a great deal about Thranduil and Legolas, since he had joined the remaining members of the Fellowship in Minas Tirith.

"I suspect Thranduil doesn't want to venture into alien lands. I also believe he wants to see Legolas and his grandson, but Thranduil…" Haldir paused, "When your summons reached Thranduil, he was severely upset. He was afraid he would lose his son during this quest. The last time I saw him, Thranduil was in a bad way – fading."

"Because of…" Haldir and Legolas had told him about Thranduil's former lover, but he had a hard time recalling the name right now.

"Remmen." Haldir cradled Legolas and their son against his chest. "Thranduil is still mourning the loss." He clearly remembered the night they had shared beneath a dark sky, watching the stars fall down onto Arda. "He wished he wasn't alone any more – that someone loved him. And the Valar know he deserves someone who loves him!"

Elrond moistened his lips. "I never gave much thought to the matter. Thranduil and I parted in bad ways after the Battle of the Last Alliance and I haven't seen him since. I reckon it would be good if he visited Minas Tirith and got acquainted with his grandson. Maybe you should send another messenger?"

"I doubt sending another one will make a difference," said Haldir skeptically. "Maybe more drastic measures are necessary."

"What are your plans?" Elrond could tell Haldir had already made up his mind in this matter. 

"Maybe Thranduil will relent when facing three, very determined 'Lorien Elves." Rúmil and Mithrandir had arrived in Minas Tirith some weeks ago and Orophin had arrived with Elrond's party months ago. The three brothers had finally been reunited.

Elrond arched an eyebrow. "You plan on going to Mirkwood yourself?"

"With Rúmil and Orophin for company. Yes." Haldir looked pleadingly at Elrond. "That leaves me with a very important request. I will have to leave Legolas here in Minas Tirith, and although I know he can take care of himself and our son, he will need special attention these next few weeks. Will you continue to look after him?"

"But of course!" Aragorn's entire household had taken a liking to Legolas and everyone was looking forward to pampering the infant. "We will take good care of him!"

A knock on the door cut their conversation short. Haldir called out, "Who is it?"

"'Tis I," replied the King, "And several of your family members, Haldir." Rúmil, Orophin, Mithrandir, Elladan and Gimli stood behind him. His lovely Arwen was eager to open the door the moment Haldir permitted them to enter. "Haldir, we want to see the baby!" His friends were pressing him against the door and he was about to tell them to back off when Haldir told them to enter. "Thank the Valar! It was becoming hard to breathe!"

Legolas woke when the large party entered and was briefly annoyed with Haldir for letting them visit when he was so tired, but after seeing the delicate smiles on their friends' faces – especially Gimli's – he couldn't deny them meeting his son.

"We won't stay long," said Arwen, quickly, seeing how drained Legolas looked. "We just want to make sure you and the baby are fine."

"And I still need to have a word with you for fighting alongside me during your pregnancy," said Aragorn, slightly admonishingly. "I would never have forgiven myself for endangering a new life."

"That's why I didn't tell you," said Legolas softly. His son's hazel eyes had opened and now curiously looked at the strangers that surrounded him. Displeased with this development, he began to cry, testing the capacity of his lungs.

"Formidable lungs," commented Mithrandir, teasingly.

"Takes after his mother," said Gimli, giving Legolas a playful wink.

Legolas smiled, fatigued. His gaze sought out Haldir's and for one moment he forgot about the others' presence. They had discussed what name to give the baby, should he give birth to a boy and he hoped Haldir still agreed with his choice. "I want to call him Remmen."

"After your father," whispered Haldir in understanding. "I think it is an excellent name for our son." He gently wiped away the tears that left Legolas' azure eyes.

Arwen wrapped an arm around Aragorn's waist, looking forward to the day when she would hold her own child in her arms. "We should leave them alone now." There was still a lot to do before their wedding could take place.

"Yes, we should," agreed Mithrandir, who now began to shoo everyone from the room. Gimli protested briefly, insisting he should stay and guard the baby, but the Dwarf quickly realized Haldir was more than up to his parental tasks. Grumbling displeased, he left the room, determined to visit with Legolas and the baby as quickly as possible.

Being the last one to leave, Mithrandir looked over his shoulder at Legolas and said, "Thranduil should see his grandson and learn of his chosen name."

Legolas' gaze darkened. "He won't come to Minas Tirith."

"Send Haldir… and his brothers. Though the thought of having to part from Rúmil pains me." His gaze shifted from Legolas to Haldir. "Your brother has become very dear to me."

When Haldir had first learned of his brother's chosen mate, his heart had missed several beats. He had been afraid that Rúmil had made a terrible mistake, but once his brother and Mithrandir had joined them in Minas Tirith, he had seen them interact with such love in their eyes and gestures that he had changed his mind. Now, he was glad his brother had found love.

"Mithrandir is right," said Legolas slowly. Exhaustion tried to pull him under, but he fought sleep bravely. "I would go myself, but I am still recovering. *You* should fetch Ada. He won't say no to you."

Elrond, who had been silent up until now, released an approving 'hum'. Considering everything Haldir and Legolas had told him about Thranduil these past few months, he tended to agree. "If Thranduil is really still mourning his lover's passing after all these millennia, you must find a way to bring him here." He might fade otherwise, and Legolas needed his father alive and close.

Legolas' eyes, already filling with slumber, found Haldir's. "I don't want to part from you, even for the purpose of you fetching my father, but I do think it is the best thing. When will you leave? And you *will* hurry back to me, won't you?"

"I will leave in a few days," said Haldir, "I want to be there for our son during the first days of his life. And I want to be there for you. Rest now."

Legolas succumbed to exhaustion again – trusting Haldir and Elrond to take care of him and his son.

Gimli's large hands carefully petted the baby's head. The Dwarf smiled brilliantly at the infant and then lifted his eyes to meet Legolas' amused ones. "You should never have taken the risk of fighting in the frontline." At the time he had wondered about Haldir's concern, which had seemed exaggerated to him, but when he had learned of the pregnancy he had finally understood.

"I am alive, Gimli, and so is my son. What use is there in discussing something that clearly belongs in the past?" Legolas smiled happily when Remmen made soft cooing sounds. "He is perfect."

"All Elves think they are perfect," commented Gimli. "Well, I know one thing for sure; your husband isn't perfect at all!" Gimli pointed at Haldir, who had fallen asleep in the chair beside the bed.

"Don't be so hard on him, Gimli. You and I had plenty of time to rest, but he has been on his feet since the first contraction announced the birth. He is exhausted."

"That is no excuse to fall asleep on you!" A soft rumble emanated from deep within his throat, followed by warm laughter. "I am only teasing you, laddie."

"I know that, Gimli," said Legolas, obliging his son when Remmen tried to pull a thumb into his mouth. The sucking sensation that went through his digit was exceptional and Legolas blushed. Seeing Gimli's grin, he explained, "He is my first, Gimli. I have no idea what to expect!"

"And your father isn't here to tell you." Gimli frowned. "He shouldn't let you do this alone."

"He will hopefully join us here shortly. I miss him so much!" Legolas watched Remmen's eyes fill with sleep and he sighed, relieved. The baby demanded his attention most of the time and he was looking forward to the moment that Haldir would wake up again and could take over. He was tired.

"Maybe I can hold Remmen for you? That way you can get some sleep. He will be in the best hands with me," offered Gimli, looking adoringly at the tiny infant. With his golden-hair, he looked like a miniature of his best friend. "He will always have a friend and protector in me."

"I know you don't speak those words lightly and I thank you for being a good friend." Legolas carefully placed Remmen in Gimli's arms, hoping his son would enjoy being close to the Dwarf.

Gimli held his breath when large, hazel eyes met his. "He is so tiny, not like Dwarven children at all. Well, Dwarven children are small too, but they aren't this… fragile."

"Whatever you do," said Haldir unexpectedly, "Don't drop my son on his head." His eyes, now alert again, met Gimli's.

"Gimli would never do that," said Legolas, coming to his friend's defense and only belatedly realizing that Haldir was teasing. "Haldir, I am already tired and now you are adding to my fatigue!"

Haldir's expression turned guilty. "You are right. I will behave instead." Haldir rose from his chair, walked over to Legolas, and kissed his husband lightly on the lips. "Gimli and I will look after Remmen. Try to sleep, my love."

Lured into relaxation by Haldir's voice and words, Legolas willingly gave into sleep.

Haldir watched Gimli rock Remmen, and smiled. His son was in the best hands indeed.

The next time that Legolas awoke, he found Aragorn sitting in the chair beside the bed instead of Haldir. He was severely disorientated and not even sure what time of the day it was. One look out of the window told him Arien was descending and Ithil rising. It was evening then, probably around dinner time. His next glance was for Remmen, who was sound asleep in the crib.

"Haldir asked me to make sure you ate," said Aragorn, moving closer and putting a tray on the side of the bed. Seeing Legolas' futile attempts to push himself into a sitting position he promptly assisted this friend. Once Legolas was seated comfortably, he placed the tray with food on his friend's lap.

"Where is that elusive husband of mine?" inquired Legolas, sipping some of the broth. His stomach growled, and after finishing the broth he started on the fresh bread, cheese and fruits.

"Haldir is talking to his brothers. They are planning their trip to Mirkwood. Are you certain it isn't too soon for Haldir to leave your side? I clearly recall how emotional you were during those last few weeks of your pregnancy." Fondly, he thought back to that one time when he had found Legolas raving and ranting because Haldir hadn't joined him quickly enough…

#_"Haldir doesn't love me any more! Just say it!" Legolas seemed to deflate now that his anger was giving way to sorrow and disappointment. _

_Aragorn didn't know what to do. He had come upon Legolas by accident. The pregnant Elf was seated in the garden, enjoying Arien's last warm rays that day and Aragorn had merely inquired about the other's health. Legolas was a dear friend and he had vowed privately to look after him when he had learned of the Elf's pregnancy. _

_Legolas reacted pleasantly and Aragorn sat down, enjoying the sunset. Then he made the mistake of inquiring about Haldir as well._

"_I don't know where he is," replied Legolas, whose gaze suddenly dulled. "I haven't seen him since this morning. He has probably tired of me. And I can't blame him. Look at me!" Legolas placed one hand protectively over his stomach. "I have grown huge this last moon!"_

"_You are close to giving birth, my friend." Aragorn wondered what else to say in order to comfort the distraught Elf. "It is normal for your girth to expand." Legolas suddenly cried out beside him and he bit his bottom lip, knowing he had said the wrong thing. Quickly, he wrapped an arm around Legolas' shoulder, trying to soothe him. "Haldir loves you. You know that. He defeated death to be with you. That injury should have killed him, but he came back for you. Don't doubt his love for you. There is no reason to do so." But he also realized things weren't that simple to Legolas, who in his last month of pregnancy had turned unpredictable and highly emotional. Haldir had told him that he felt as if he had to walk on eggshells around Legolas._

"_Then why isn't he here? Why did he leave me alone?" Tears dripped from Legolas' face. _

_Aragorn sighed and used his sleeve to gently wipe away the tears. Legolas had bloomed during his pregnancy and his friend had never been more beautiful to him. But Legolas obviously didn't see things that way. He was certain that if Legolas hadn't been married to Haldir, several suitors would have pleaded with him to accept them as his lover. "Haldir will hurry back to you. But you also know that Rúmil and Mithrandir have arrived last night and that Haldir has missed his brother." Legolas' sobs increased in volume and Aragorn cursed himself for saying the wrong thing again. "He didn't desert you for Rúmil! You know that!"_

"_I want Haldir! I want him close!" Pouting, and feeling hurt, Legolas lifted swimming eyes to meet Aragorn's. "I need him!"_

"_Stay here and I will fetch him for you!" Aragorn was growing desperate. Legolas had to calm down! Being stressed in his current condition was not advisable. "I will be back in a moment!" He nearly ran out of the gardens, hoping to quickly locate the elusive Galadhel. When he finally found Haldir, he grabbed hold of him and dragged him along. "You are coming with me right now!"_

_Haldir's eyes widened quizzically, realizing the stressed state Aragorn was in. It was highly unusual to see the fabled warrior out of control. "What happened?" Behind him, he heard his brother and Mithrandir chuckle amused, but the distance between them was quickly increasing._

"_Legolas happened. He is crying because you left him alone!" Dragging Haldir with him, Aragorn released a relieved sigh when he found Legolas was still in the same place as where he had left him. "Go to him and make sure he stops crying!"_

_Haldir grinned, realizing how nervous his friend was. "Rest assured; I will comfort him." He had grown somewhat used to Legolas' quickly changing moods over these past few months. Leaving Aragorn behind, he quickly advanced on his lover and sat down beside him. "Miss me?" Legolas swatted him – which didn't surprise him at all. He half expected it. "I reckon that your answer is yes?"_

"_You left me alone! You don't love me any more!"_

"_Oh, you sweet, lovable fool," mumbled Haldir, gently wrapping his arms around Legolas. "I will always love you. You carry my child, Legolas. I will always be yours."_

_Legolas calmed down slowly, but still sniffed, trying to do away with his tears. "I hate it when you leave me alone."_

"_I went to welcome my brother and Mithrandir. I would have asked you to come along, but you were peacefully asleep when I left our rooms." Haldir rubbed Legolas' fingers, knowing the caress would calm him down further. "I was never far away from you."_

"_I need you close, Haldir, now that Ada isn't here." Legolas sagged against Haldir and enjoyed being held by his husband. "I miss him." And then the tears started all over again. #_

"Aragorn?" Legolas frowned, finding his friend staring blindly into the distance. "Is something amiss?"

"No, I was just recalling that day in the gardens when you were emotional because Haldir had gone to greet his brother and Mithrandir."

"You must be relieved now that my mood changes have faded." Legolas had finished eating and now indulged himself in a glass of miruvor that Elrond had ordered him to drink each evening, for it would strengthen him. "I am relieved too."

Aragorn had the grace to smile. "You possessed other charms that made up for the mood swings. I must admit to being curious. I wonder what it was like for Thranduil when he was pregnant with you." Legolas' eyes filled with moisture at hearing his father's name and Aragorn cursed himself for bringing the Woodland King up. "I am sorry."

"I just hope Haldir will convince my father to come to Minas Tirith with him. I want both of them close." Legolas composed himself and wiped away the single tear that had left his eye. "My mood swings haven't vanished completely yet."

"You are entitled to them, my dearest friend," said Aragorn in a gentle tone. His gaze shifted from Legolas to Remmen, and he smiled, hoping the Valar would grace Arwen and he with a child in the near future as well.

Title: Behind Emerald Eyes

Author: Morgana  
Author's Email: morganalebeau  
Web page: .

Main pairings; Haldir/ Legolas, Thranduil/ surprise, Celeborn/surprise. See for other already established pairings LOML.

Rating: NC-17.  
Summary: Just when Thranduil has given up on finding love and resigned himself to fading, a new love enters his life.

Disclaimer: Not mine, Tolkien's. Hum, I guess Magolion is mine… And so is Remmen…  
Warning: mpreg, minor angst, child loss and the story is AU of course!  
Author's Note: Beta read by Sulien. All remaining mistakes are mine. FB is always welcome, but flames get send to Sauron!

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 2

"You can entrust Remmen to me, Legolas," said Orophin, giving the baby an adoring look. This would be the first – and last evening – that Haldir and Legolas would have alone before the three brothers left for Mirkwood. Elladan, sitting in a rocking chair, which Arwen had placed in Remmen's nursery, was also looking forward to keeping an eye on the baby. Orophin and he would never have children of their own, so they had decided to 'adopt' Remmen and to be the best uncles they could be.

"Thank you for doing this," said Haldir, grateful that Orophin and Elladan understood that Legolas and he needed some privacy before leaving Minas Tirith. He loved Remmen, but the baby did demand much of Legolas' time and attention, and he was looking forward to having his beloved to himself for one evening.

"You are most welcome!" Elladan giggled happily when Orophin placed Remmen in his arms and he started to rock slowly. The motion quickly lured the Elfling into sleep. "He is a sweet baby."

"Yes, he is," said Haldir with fatherly pride. "We will leave at the crack of dawn," he said, reminding Orophin to be ready to leave.

"Rúmil and I will be there – don't worry. Now go! Legolas is waiting for you!" Orophin shooed Haldir from the room, closed the door and then managed to squeeze his way onto the rocking chair as well. Partly sitting on Elladan's lap, they cradled the baby in their arms, watching Remmen sleep.

"I don't want you to leave," said Legolas, sighing. He had cuddled up to Haldir in their nest of pillows on the balcony. It was a lovely summer night and the stars carried their own warm radiance. "But I don't want Ada to stay in Mirkwood either!" His heart was torn in opposite directions.

"I could stay," suggested Haldir, "And send my brothers instead." But he also knew that would minimize their chances to convince Thranduil to visit with Legolas.

"They won't succeed in bringing him here. Ada won't listen to them. But he *will* listen to you. He has had a soft spot for you from the beginning, and he will be unable to deny you when you tell him about our baby. You must go in person." As they were lying close to one another, Legolas rested his head on Haldir's chest and wrapped his arms around his beloved's waist.

Haldir reacted by soothingly stroking Legolas' back and pulled him even closer. After pressing a kiss onto the golden hair, he said, "I won't take no for an answer. I will bring him to you."

"He probably feels intimidated and fears feeling out of place here," said Legolas, swallowing hard. "It has been millennia since he left home and the thought of having to face Elrond and the others, which whom he still has differences from the Battle of the Last Alliance, might keep him back. He didn't part with them on good terms. These are foreign lands to him. He will feel like the weaker party here."

Haldir continued the gentle caresses and realized there wouldn't be any passionate lovemaking tonight. He had hoped to make Legolas his again, but his mate was too troubled to find pleasure in that deed. Haldir understood; whenever his brothers weren't close, he felt incomplete as well. "Do you think he is still fading?"

"I am afraid so," said Legolas, voicing his worst fear. "I desperately hope you will reach him in time to stop him from fading completely. Bring him here. In Remmen he might find a reason to live. I am too selfish to let him leave for the Halls of Waiting. Something tells me his time hasn't come yet."

"I share your opinion." Haldir held Legolas tight, hoping Thranduil would relent and join them in Minas Tirith.

Aragorn had decided to stay close to Legolas now that Haldir was leaving. The three brothers had mounted their horses and had said most of their goodbyes. Mithrandir had moved back into the castle, unwilling to watch Rúmil temporarily vanish from his life. Elladan stood at a distance, trying to stop the tears from leaving his eyes.

Haldir bend forward, ran his fingertips lightly over Remmen's head and then reached for Legolas to press one last kiss onto his beloved's lips. "Listen to Elrond and Aragorn and do as they tell you. You are still recovering, my love." He felt reassured, knowing the two healers would keep a close eye on his family. "I vow to return with Thranduil."

"I hope that Ada will let you keep that promise," said Legolas in an emotional tone. "Now go, love. This parting is driving me to tears." He clutched Remmen against his chest, rocking his baby slowly. "Please be careful on the roads." There were still Orcs and Uruk-Hai on the loose!

"I survived Helm's Deep," said Haldir with a wicked grin on his face. "I will also survive this trip, as I have you to come home to." Steering his horse away from Legolas and Remmen, his heart began to feel heavier with every step that took him further away from his loved ones. Looking over his shoulder at Legolas, he raised a hand in goodbye; a gesture that his brothers mimicked.

Their jaws set in determination, all three wished they could stay with their mates instead, but for Legolas' sake they would travel to Mirkwood and drag a reluctant Thranduil to Minas Tirith to be reunited with his son and grandson.

"Remmen?" Legolas lay on his back, sprawled comfortably on his bed. He missed Haldir already and focused on his son instead.

Remmen, wide awake after a long nap, stared questioningly at Legolas. Even as young as he was, he wondered where the other one had gone; the silver-haired Elf who also looked after him.

Rearranging Remmen in his arms, Legolas maneuvered his son into a comfortable position and then studied the hazel eyes. The babies he had seen in his life time usually had deep blue eyes, but Remmen's were already as hazel as Haldir's – a constant reminder of his beloved. "I wonder how your Ada is doing. Does he miss us? I am sure he does..." He certainly missed Haldir! The Galadhel had only been away for a few hours, but his heart was breaking now that Haldir wasn't close. "He will bring your Ata'da back with him. I am certain you will love your grandfather, Remmen." He just knew that Thranduil would lose his heart the moment his father set eyes upon the baby.

"Legolas?" Gimli had pushed the door ajar, when his knock on the door had remained unanswered. "May I enter?" He smiled brightly, seeing the love for Remmen in Legolas' eyes. He had come here because he suspected that Legolas was feeling miserable now that Haldir had left. Maybe he could offer some comfort and create some distraction.

"Gimli!" Smiling fondly, Legolas sat upright and leaned his back against the headboard. "I wasn't expecting you."

"I wanted to inquire if you are up to taking a walk with me. Some sunlight will do you good, laddie." Gimli couldn't help feeling protective of Legolas now that Haldir had left, and it was a delight to spend time with them. He had long lost his heart to Remmen.

"Legolas? I was wondering if…" Aragorn stopped in his tracks upon entering Legolas' rooms, realizing Gimli had had similar ideas and had come here to distract their friend.

"Yes?" Legolas resigned himself to the situation, picked Remmen up, and carried him with him when he walked over to his friends. "Let me guess. You were wondering if I was up to a walk in the gardens." He had half expected his friends to fuss over him, but was still surprised the mothering had started this quickly.

Aragorn nodded; a sheepish expression appearing in his eyes. "Arwen arranged for a pick nick. Elladan and she are awaiting us in the gardens. I hope you don't mind. And Gimli, you are always welcome to join us." Arwen had suggested they looked after Legolas and Remmen now that Haldir had left. They had also invited Elladan, who was gloomy now that Orophin had departed with his brothers.

"I will join you," said Legolas, reminding himself they were acting in this manner because they cared for him – maybe even worried about him. They were just trying to be good friends – although he suspected that their fussing would quickly get to him.

"May I carry the lad?" Gimli opened his arms in the hope of receiving Remmen into them.

Legolas gave Gimli a proud smile and made sure his son was safely tucked away in the strong, Dwarven arms. His smile turned a bit wicked, seeing the normally grumpy Dwarf happily googooing and gaagaaing at Remmen. Letting his friends' presence comfort him, he followed them out of the room and into the gardens.

Elladan knew exactly how Legolas felt, as he missed his mate's company as well. Both Elves found comfort in the fact that they were surrounded by their loved ones, but their friends' company couldn't make up for the pain the absence of their lovers caused.

The three brothers quickly grew accustomed to being on the road again and also resumed their 'normal' bantering. Now that they were together again, they realized just how much they had missed each other's company.

After traveling almost nonstop for two days, Haldir finally called for a rest. They had gone easy on the horses, riding at a comfortable pace, and now riders and mounts were in need of a rest. They set up camp, and Rúmil took the first watch.

From across the fire, Haldir's gaze met Orophin's and he read a very familiar emotion in his brother's eyes. "I miss them too."

"It must be even more difficult for you," said Orophin, musing aloud. "You left behind your mate and your firstborn."

Haldir nodded; leaving Legolas and Remmen behind was the hardest thing he had ever done. But he also knew how badly Legolas needed Thranduil. "Are you happy with Elladan? Do you ever regret taking him as your mate?"

Orophin smiled; knowing that it was his overly protective big brother talking. Haldir had always wanted the best for him. "I am truly happy, Haldir."

"Do you think Rúmil is happy too? I was stunned to hear that he loved Mithrandir."

"I was surprised too," admitted Orophin, "But I have seldom seen Rúmil this happy. He seems more at peace." Rúmil had always possessed a restless streak, which was slowly diminishing and being replaced by a calm sense of belonging.

Haldir smiled at Orophin. "It seems that all three of us have found true love then."

Whilst standing guard, Rúmil smiled; the wind had carried his brothers' voices over to him, and he was relieved, realizing they accepted Mithrandir in their lives.

"Thank you for keeping me company," said Legolas, smiling at Elrond and Lindir. The minstrel had sung for them, whilst Elrond and he had played chess. During these last few days he had found himself incredibly busy. During the day, Gimli and Aragorn kept him distracted, and in the evenings either Erestor and Glorfindel, or Elrond and Lindir would sit with him. He had now reached a point where he was actually looking forward to being alone for the night!

"We can stay for the night if you would like that," offered Elrond, who was still worried that Legolas was hiding his pain, merely pretending to be coping with Haldir's absence.

"Elrond, please believe me when I say that Remmen and I are fine." Legolas cast a loving glance at his son, who was soundly asleep in the cradle. "I miss Haldir, but Remmen constantly reminds me of him, and I know Haldir will return to me. There is no need to brood about my well-being, although I am flattered that you would worry about me." Legolas rose to his feet and placed a hand on Elrond's shoulder. "Spend some time with Lindir instead."

Elrond blushed. Although it was common knowledge that Lindir and he were together, he still blushed whenever someone mentioned his lover. His love for Lindir was deep and still relatively new.

"I would like that, beloved," whispered Lindir. Leaning in closer, he seductively ran his fingertips through Elrond's tresses of raven dark hair. Looking at Legolas, he easily read the other's desire for privacy. "Come with me." He gently pulled Elrond to his feet and led the half-Elf into the corridor, heading for their guest quarters.

Legolas released a relieved sigh now that he was finally alone and closed the door. After locking it, he moved to the cradle, picked up Remmen and cuddled up to his son on his bed. All he wanted was to spend the night with his son, without any more interruptions or mothering from his friends.

Feeling his son's warm body pressed against his, sleep quickly took him and he tumbled into the land of dreams – dreams filled with Haldir's image.

"They continue to grow. Apparently this soil meets their needs." Glorfindel, pleased, looked at Erestor, who was sitting beside him on the grass. When Elrond had asked them to accompany him to Minas Tirith they had followed, but they had also taken a small part of Imladris with them.

The seeds Glorfindel had planted half a year ago had become strong plants. Aragon had been kind enough to offer them a secluded section of the new gardens he had designed, and they now had their own little love nest, where no one else ever came.

"They have grown strong indeed." Erestor's dark eyes blazed with the fire of ardor, looking at his lover. They had successfully built a solid and loving relationship, and had finally forgiven themselves for all past mistakes. Like their plants, their love had firmly taken root in the present.

Glorfindel briefly leaned in closer and kissed his lover's lips. "We will take seeds with us when we finally sail for Valinor." The frown that suddenly appeared on Erestor's brow worried him, and he asked, "Don't you wish to sail for the Undying Lands?"

Erestor moistened his lips, wondering how to tell Glorfindel, who was looking forward to leaving. "Elrond won't sail for a *very* long time."

"But… he said that the time of the Elves was coming to an end." Had he misunderstood?

"Think about it, Glorfindel. Celebrían is waiting for him in Valinor and Elrond has found a new love here. Do you really think he wants to give up on Lindir?"

Now Glorfindel's brow furrowed as well. "I didn't consider that…"

Erestor decided to enlighten him further. "Elrond and Lindir will return to Imladris. They just haven't told anyone yet."

"And the twins?"

Erestor sighed softly. Arwen had chosen her fate when she had fallen in love with Aragorn and the twins had made their choices as well. "Elladan and Elrohir *will* sail for Valinor, with Orophin and Magolion at their side. And so will Rúmil and Mithrandir."

Glorfindel's gaze darkened with worry. "I don't like this… What about Legolas and Haldir?"

"I suspect that they will stay until after Aragorn's death. Legolas and Aragorn have become the best of friends and our Woodland Prince won't desert him."

"So they will stay," whispered Glorfindel, still confused. "Who else will sail?"

"Galadriel will, and so will most of our kind, but others will stay behind."

"Celeborn?"

Erestor nodded and a warm smile surfaced on his face. "Celeborn is deeply connected to these lands. He won't desert them until the end of Arda."

"And what about us?" Glorfindel suddenly felt uncertain of their future. He had always assumed they would sail for Valinor after Arwen's wedding.

Erestor averted his eyes. "My heart tells me to stay here a little longer. Although I would love to stay close to my father, I feel a duty to my friends first."

"Elrond and Lindir," said Glorfindel in sudden understanding. He moved into a cross-legged sitting position and looked deeply into Erestor's eyes. "This is unexpected."

"I should have confided in you earlier, but I wasn't sure if our relationship was strong enough to face this discussion." Erestor moved closer to Glorfindel, rested his head on his lover's shoulder and purred in delight when the blond's strong arms enveloped him in a tight embrace. "I have thought about this for a long time and I have decided to leave the decision up to you. I love you too much to be separated from you and if you wish to sail for Valinor with the next ship, I will come with you."

"But part of your heart longs to stay with your friends."

"Yes, I cannot deny that leaving them behind would greatly grieve me."

Glorfindel thought back to everything he had gone through in order to reclaim his lover. "I have learned something very important when I followed you into Dol Guldur."

"And what is that?" Erestor cocked his head to look at his beloved.

"I learned to trust you and to put my faith in you. If you feel we should stay, we will. I don't want your heart torn between your friends and your lover."

"That isn't exactly correct," said Erestor quickly. "I would go with you if you chose to sail for Valinor."

"I know that." Glorfindel pressed a loving kiss on Erestor's hair and tucked his lover tight against his side. "But what I am trying to say is that my place is at your side and I made too many mistakes in judgment in the past. I trust you to do what is right for *us*."

Touched to the core of his being by Glorfindel's words, Erestor maneuvered himself closer, and managed to catch his lover's lips in a passionate kiss. /Thank you for putting your trust in me. I know how hard that is for you./ He seldom used their mental link to communicate with Glorfindel these days, but this was one of those moments where he felt it would add weight to his words. Mithrandir had taught him how to use his gifts, but he felt more comfortable pretending he didn't have any of these powers. He felt *safer* not using them.

/You are the love of my life, you know that, don't you?/ Glorfindel traced Erestor's bottom lip with a fingertip. /If you want to stay, we will stay. It doesn't matter to me where we are, as long as we are together./

"Oh, you have turned into a sap, Glorfindel," said Erestor, teasingly, and eagerly parted his teeth when his lover deepened their kiss. He would never get enough of his personal Balrog Slayer!

"Oh, I am already searching!" Legolas frantically scanned his surroundings for the bottled milk, which he had just fetched from the kitchen together with his lunch. He had put the bottle on the tray as well, hadn't he? Remmen seldom cried, but when he did, the screams tore at Legolas' very soul. "Peace, little one! Please! I will fetch your milk!" How could he have forgotten to add the bottled milk to the tray?

"Ah, it seems to me that you are in need of help!" Aragorn swept into Legolas' rooms, and quickly offered his friend the bottled milk. "I thought this might come in handy."

"You are a life saver!" Legolas sat down, cradled Remmen in his arms and calmed down once his son was drinking the milk. "By the Valar, look at him!" He hadn't expected Remmen to be this hungry!

"He is eager to grow into a strong warrior," said Aragorn in a warm tone. He sat down opposite Legolas, and smiled, watching his friend feed his son. "Caring for him seems to come natural to you."

"It does," confirmed Legolas. "I can still remember bits and pieces from my first few years. Thranduil and Remmen were always there for me. It didn't matter to me that I had two fathers. I loved them dearly."

"Did you ever call Thranduil mother?"

"No," said Legolas, smiling, "The first word I learned was Ada. But Remmen liked to tease Thranduil by calling him nana."

Aragorn nodded, seeing Remmen drink eagerly. "He will grow strong."

"I hope so. He is my first and I am not certain I am doing everything right." Legolas' smile faded slightly. "I wished my father was here – and Haldir."

"Do you and Haldir plan on having more children?"

"He wants more children, yes. And so do I."

Aragorn was relieved to see Legolas' smile brighten again. "I should have known, considering he has two brothers."

"Haldir is a good mate," said Legolas slowly, "The best I could wish for."

"But?" Aragorn raised an eyebrow inquisitively.

"I wish he were back already and that my father was here as well. I miss them both and I am afraid my father is once more fading now that I am not close to keep him here."

"He must have loved Remmen with his entire heart."

"He did. They were happy. *We* were happy." Legolas' gaze met Aragorn's. "Seeing my father's reaction after losing Remmen made me very aware of how transitory life is. It is said that we Elves are immortal, but I know better. Even Elves die." Remmen had finished his milk and Legolas now helped him burp. "This is one of the things that I remember vividly; my father holding me close."

Aragorn watched Legolas closely and saw the need and longing in his friend's azure eyes. "I am certain that Haldir will succeed and convince Thranduil to come to Minas Tirith."

Remmen burped dutifully, and then rested his head on Legolas' shoulder – sleepy once more. Legolas cradled his son tightly and restored eye contact, realizing Aragorn wanted to say something. "Yes?"

"Your son is very fortunate to have your love, my dearest friend." Aragorn rose from his chair, walked over to Legolas and gently stroked the baby's head. "His hair will be golden." A few strands already showed. "He has inherited Haldir's eyes and your hair. He will be very fair and break a lot of hearts when he reaches his majority."

Legolas' eyes burned with pride. "Thank you for those kind words."

"It is the truth," said Aragorn, bending down to press a light kiss onto the baby's brow. "And he will always have a home here if he desires it. Will you stay, Legolas, or take him away from us?"

"I will stay for now," replied Legolas. "I have no desire to leave just yet. This does feel like home to me."

"But you will leave eventually," predicted Aragorn.

"Haldir and I might eventually settle down in Ithilien, but we will still be close. We will visit regularly." Legolas gave Aragorn a reassuring smile. "I won't sail for Valinor until after…" Suddenly his voice failed him, unwilling as he was to speak those damning words.

"Until after my death," finished Aragorn for his friend, touched. "Thank you for staying, Legolas. I will need friends to help me realize my dreams." Acting instinctively and on impulse, he gently stroked Legolas' silken hair. "The fact that Haldir and you will stay means a lot to me." Abruptly, he turned away from Legolas and left the room, briefly overwhelmed by his feelings. Shortly, many of his friends would sail for Valinor and a sense of loneliness and abandonment regularly washed over him. /But Legolas and Haldir won't desert me./ His friends would stand by him until the day he died.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 3

Haldir instinctively knew something was terribly wrong when he approached the caves – the heart of Thranduil's home. The number of sentries had been low, and now that the danger Dol Guldur had presented in the past was gone, he suspected that a large number of Woodland Elves had left for the Havens. Only a few seemed to have stayed behind, probably to care for their King. Mirkwood was deserted save for a few brave souls that watched over Thranduil.

"Thank the Valar that you came back!" One of the sentries approached, looking trustingly at the three silver-haired Elves. "Where is Legolas?"

"Legolas stayed behind in Minas Tirith after giving birth to our son," explained Haldir, whilst he and his brothers dismounted. "How fares your King?"

"He is barely alive. Only a few of us have stayed behind to look after him. The majority has left for Valinor, but we couldn't leave him behind. He is so helpless now." The sentry gave Haldir a worried look. "He is dying."

Haldir gasped; his worst fear had come true. "Where is he?" He assumed Thranduil would have taken to the telain once more, but the sentry led him underground, into the caves instead.

"We cannot persuade him to leave Remmen's tomb. He refuses to leave." The sentry's eyes misted over with tears. "We tried to talk to him, to make him eat and rest, but he refuses."

They had now reached an exit, and once they had stepped outside. Haldir immediately noticed the elegantly carved tomb, made from dark marble and laid in with the brightest emeralds he had ever seen. "You may leave us now," he told the sentry. "We will take good care of him."

The sentry nodded and gave Haldir another grateful look before disappearing into the caves again. As long as Thranduil dwelt in Mirkwood, he and a handful of the King's most loyal soldiers would stay as well.

"Brother?" Rúmil stared at the huddled figure, which crouched near the tomb. "Can that be…?" Could that wretched form really be Thranduil?

Haldir reacted at once and slowly approached the figure, which was dressed in a green cloak – a dark hood drawn over his head, obscuring the features. "Thranduil?" Haldir's voice trembled when speaking the name, and when he sat on his heels beside the figure, he realized the form was shaking violently. Raising a hand, he cautiously pushed back the hood, finally revealing a pale face. Haldir hissed in shock, getting his first look at Thranduil. The blond's features had become hollow and were sunken, and the normally sparkling irises had almost faded to white. They had arrived just in time.

"Thranduil?" Ignoring his brothers' shocked gasps, Haldir brushed back the brittle hair, which more resembled hay than the silken mane that it used to be. "Oh, what have you done to yourself?" Now that he was getting a closer look, he realized that the Woodland King had long ago stopped eating. Sharp bones pressed against the transparent skin.

Rúmil and Orophin exchanged worried looks, wondering what to do. In the end, they decided to wait for Haldir's orders. Their brother knew Thranduil best and hopefully knew what course of action to take.

As Thranduil wasn't reacting to his presence, Haldir moved even closer and managed to gather the other Elf's skeleton-like hands in his. There was only one word Thranduil had always responded to and he hoped it would reach the dying Elf now as well. "Ada?"

Thranduil blinked. Had someone called him father? He had been out of touch with reality for the last few days and was waiting to finally journey to the Halls of Waiting, but now someone had called him father. His lips moved, and he tried to pronounce his son's name, but no sound came forth from his lips. He hadn't drunken any water for days and his mouth was too dry to obey his command to speak.

"Oh, Ada!" Relieved to find Thranduil lifting his eyes in an attempt to focus on him, Haldir reacted by enveloping him in a loose hug. His first instinct had been to press Thranduil tightly against him, but the blond seemed so fragile that he was afraid he would accidentally snap bones. "We arrived just in time!" Thranduil was in no state to protest his actions, and Haldir took charge. It was obvious they needed to attend to Thranduil's needs, and there was only one person who could truly do that. "I am taking you with me to Minas Tirith."

Thranduil pinched his eyes shut, and tried to identity the Elf in front of him. He knew it wasn't Legolas for his bond with his son would tell him so, but this Elf seemed familiar as well.

"We are leaving, Ada. You cannot stay here." Haldir pushed his arms beneath Thranduil's knees and back and gently lifted his charge. He was shocked at the low weight he held in his arms and realized they needed to get food and water into the badly malnourished and dehydrated body. "Rúmil, head for the kitchens and have them prepare a light meal. Orophin, locate Thranduil's quarters and fetch clean clothes. Also pack a bag with his personal belongings and add traveling clothes. We are taking him with us and we will leave within the hour!"

His brothers hurried to carry out his orders, whilst Haldir carefully carried Thranduil into the direction of the kitchens. "Have you recognized me by now, Ada?"

Thranduil had closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of Haldir's body warmth against his. He couldn't remember the last time that strong arms had caught and carried him, and now that he felt safe, he simply wished to surrender to this sensation, not think about it.

"I reckon that is no," whispered Haldir, displeased. "I should have come for you earlier." They had finally reached the kitchens and the one cook that had remained behind had prepared a light meal with Rúmil's help.

Haldir placed Thranduil at the kitchen table and found he had to sit down as well, keeping his arms wrapped around the other Elf's waist. Without the support Thranduil would have swayed and crumpled. "Rúmil, he needs to eat some hot broth, but he cannot feed himself and I must hold him up."

Rúmil sat down, took hold of the spoon, and slowly fed Thranduil.

Thranduil's eyes opened in surprise, finding something pleasantly warm making its way down his throat. More of the warm liquid was spooned into his mouth and he swallowed automatically. Sitting in silence, he swallowed most of the broth.

Rúmil and Haldir exchanged pleasant looks, though their gazes remained dark with worry. "You are doing well," said Haldir, praising his dazed charge. Thranduil was hanging on by the skin of his teeth. He didn't dare think of what he would have found had they arrived a date later – probably Thranduil's corpse. "Just a little bread and then we will let you sleep."

Sleep? When was the last time he had slept? How long had he kept this vigil at Remmen's tomb? Something warm and soft was pushed between his teeth and he tried to spit it out, but he lacked the strength to do so.

Rúmil had soaked the bread in more broth before feeding it to Thranduil, figuring it was easier to swallow for the Woodland Elf that way. Looking at the sunken features, his heart went out to Thranduil. "We should leave for Minas Tirith as quickly as possible."

"You are taking him with you?" The sentry that had guided them to Thranduil had reappeared and now stood beside the cook.

"Yes, I will take him to Minas Tirith, where Legolas resides." Haldir saw relief in their eyes and knew they would help him. "Do you have fresh horses? Ours are tired and I want to hurry back."

"We will provide you with Thranduil's best horses," promised the sentry before hurrying away.

"I packed most of his personal belongings and some clothes – just as you ordered, brother." Orophin had found his way into the kitchen and placed the bag on the floor. "Are we ready to leave?" Originally the brothers had planned to rest a day before beginning their journey back to Minas Tirith, but after seeing the state Thranduil was in, they had realized they didn't have the luxury of rest. They had to leave as quickly as possible.

Haldir felt Thranduil's food intake was satisfactory and nodded once. "Did you also find a warmer cape? A riding cloak, perhaps?" Thranduil was as cold as ice beneath his touch. "But first we need to clean him up."

The cook had apparently anticipated that request and placed a large bowl filled with warm water on the table, together with towels and a wash cloth.

"Thank you," said Haldir, smiling at the she-Elf. Then, his gaze shifted to his brothers. "You will have to wash the grime and sweat off of him whilst I steady him."

The two brothers carefully removed Thranduil's dirty clothes and then gently washed the pale skin. Finally the real extent of damage the grief had done showed and they did their work in silence and with grim determination. After cleaning Thranduil up and washing the worst dirt from the brittle hair, they dressed their charge in warm clothes, leather boots and finished with a warm, dark green riding cloak that should keep Thranduil warm.

Haldir and his brothers managed to get Thranduil to his feet, and when his hazel eyes met the Woodland Elf's, Haldir realized the other Elf was more aware of them than he had first been. "I am sorry for doing this without your permission, but you can clearly not attend to your needs, so we will do it for you as long as necessary."

The warm broth, bread and clean clothes had partly brought Thranduil out of his trance and he stared questioningly at Haldir.

Haldir tightened his hold on Thranduil and made sure the other Elf wouldn't accidentally take a fall. "You recognize me."

Still too drained to talk, Thranduil managed a weak nod. He lacked the strength to move on his own and had to permit Haldir to lift him once more. Ashamed of being carried like a babe, he succeeded in resting his head against Haldir's chest. Part of the brittle hair fell in front of his face, hiding his features from his rescuers. He had reached the point where he no longer cared what happened to him and he allowed Haldir to take control of his life – or what was still left of it.

"Orophin? Hold him whilst I mount my horse." Satisfied, Haldir found that their horses had been replaced and their saddle bags filled with enough food to last until they had reached Minas Tirith. He mounted his horse and then helped Orophin lift Thranduil into the saddle in front of him. "I have him." His arms encircled Thranduil's waist once more and he guided the other Elf's back against his chest, encouraging Thranduil to rest against him. Now that the blond was safely in his arms, he told his brothers to mount.

The sentry and cook appeared to say their last goodbyes to Thranduil, but their King hardly heard their words, when they wished him well.

"Rest assured. He is in the best hands with us," said Haldir, "And thank you for caring for him."

"We love him," said the sentry. "He is a good and kind King and it pains us to see him in this sorry state."

"What will you do?" asked Rúmil of the last remaining Woodland Elves.

"We will take his possessions to Minas Tirith and, once we know he has settled down there comfortably, we will leave for Valinor."

Haldir pressed his heels into the flanks of his horse and guided the mount away from the caves. It would take them one week at least to travel to Minas Tirith and they could only hope Thranduil would survive that long. "Think of Legolas," whispered Haldir into Thranduil's ear. "Think of Legolas and your grandson. Legolas loves you and wants you to join them. Think of them. Think of their love for you. Hold onto your love for them!"

/I will try,/ thought Thranduil, lost in a maze of racing, and confusing thoughts. He just hoped he had enough strength left to fight death.

Mithrandir had finally located Legolas and Remmen in the gardens. Summer lasted long this year and Arien shone generously, showering Arda with warmth. In a few weeks' time he would sail for Valinor, and although he yearned to return there, his heart ached for the ones who would stay behind. It also ached with a sweet pain for the youngest addition to Aragorn's household.

The Elfling was lying on his back on a blanket, resting comfortably against Legolas, who was relaxed in half-slumber. Although the Woodland Elf appeared asleep, Mithrandir was confident Legolas had long heard him approach.

"Mithrandir," said Legolas slowly, yawning and pushing himself up onto an elbow to welcome the Istar. Remmen produced some unintelligible sounds and Legolas immediately redirected his attention to his son. "It appears you really like being out in the open."

"He is a true Woodland Elf, then," said Mithrandir, who sat down cross-legged opposite Legolas. "The Valar truly blessed you with this gift." Remmen awkwardly raised an arm and tried to grab hold of Mithrandir's beard. The Wizard reacted by offering Remmen his thumb instead and before he knew it, the baby was suckling the digit. "He is very eager."

"And very hungry most of the time! He will be a very chubby baby," said Legolas lightly. He reached out to gather his son in his arms. "Come here, little one. You don't want to harass Mithrandir."

"Oh, please let him!" Mithrandir gave Legolas a pleading look. "I like babies."

Legolas arched an eyebrow questioningly, finding Mithrandir had picked Remmen up and was rocking him in his arms. "You do?" There was sense of delight on Mithrandir's face which he had seldom seen before.

"All life is precious, Legolas, but this young fëa shines especially strong. It is a pleasure to hold him." Mithrandir had settled Remmen on his lap and allowed the baby to play with the long strands of his hair and beard. "Just don't tug at them."

"I must admit to being a bit surprised," ventured Legolas eventually.

"In what way?" Mithrandir managed a cast a quick look at Legolas before focusing on Remmen again.

"I never thought my son and I would be this easily accepted. Thranduil told me that Oropher preferred the family secret to remain exactly that; a secret. Only a handful of trusted advisors ever knew the truth."

Mithrandir considered this. "Much has to do with your person, Legolas. You bravely fought at Aragorn's side, saved many lives and defended the weak. People remember that. They eagerly accept you and your son."

"For that I am glad," said Legolas, smiling brightly, but then his expression darkened. "Aragorn told me you will sail for Valinor shortly?" Mithrandir would leave with the same ship that would take Frodo, Galadriel and the twins to the Undying Lands.

"That's true," admitted Mithrandir. "I wish I could stay longer, but my time here has come to an end."

"And Rúmil, the twins and their lovers will join you?"

"But Elrond will stay." Mithrandir shook his head at that. "Galadriel, Elrond and I agreed a long time ago to sail for Valinor together, but he now broke that pact."

"Because he loves Lindir and wishes to continue to love him."

"I suppose so," said Mithrandir in a thoughtful tone. "But there is still a number of Elves that will stay."

"Haldir and I will stay until after Aragorn's passing," said Legolas calmly.

"And then there is Celeborn." A sad tone colored Mithrandir's voice. "I wish he would change his mind and join us, but he is too connected to Arda. He will stay as well. Galadriel and he agreed it was time to dissolve their marriage, enabling both of them to choose new lovers."

Legolas frowned. "But I thought their love was deep and sincere!"

"It is," confirmed Mithrandir, "Their bond can never be undone, but they love each other enough to give one another a new chance at happiness." Mithrandir's gaze now darkened as well. "Did you receive any news from your father yet? I worry about him."

"Haldir will bring him here. I have to believe in that." Legolas' features briefly contorted when Remmen pulled hard on Mithrandir's hair, causing the Istar to release a pained groan. "I will take him."

"No, let him." Mithrandir fondly smiled at the little one. "I wish I had been there for Erestor when he was this young."

Legolas finally understood. "You can play with Remmen whenever you wish." Maybe playing with the baby would ease Mithrandir's pain ever so slightly.

"We should make camp for the night," said Orophin in a thoughtful tone, after catching sight of the exhaustion on Thranduil's pale face. "Make something hot to eat and encourage him to sleep. I will take first watch."

Haldir nodded his approval and called out to Rúmil, who was riding at the head of their little group. A few moments later, Orophin had left to find a good position to keep watch, and Rúmil and Haldir managed to get Thranduil off of the horse and safely onto the grass.

Haldir placed his bedroll on the grass and assisted Thranduil in getting comfortable whilst Rúmil built a small, but satisfactory fire.

After seating himself next to the Woodland Elf, Haldir gently pulled Thranduil into a sitting position against him. "Can you hear me?" Thranduil's eyes were unfocused and he wasn't sure just how alert the elder Elf was. A weak nod against his shoulder reassured him, and he told Rúmil to reheat the broth the cook had packed into their saddle bags. Maneuvering Thranduil a little more, he gained a free view of the other's face. "We are leaving Mirkwood. Do you understand that we are taking you to Minas Tirith?" Thranduil's weakness worried him, and he hoped the Woodland Elf would slowly recover now that he was being cared for.

"I… un…der…stand…" stuttered Thranduil in a barely audible tone. His voice was hoarse and raw from being unused for so long. His gaze found Haldir's and he stared questioningly at his son in law.

"Legolas sent us. He was worried about you, and rightly so," explained Haldir, who accepted the bowl filled with hot broth, which Rúmil now handed him. "You should eat something. You need to get something hot inside of you." He brought the spoon to Thranduil's lips, and the Woodland Elf obediently swallowed the warm liquid. At least Thranduil was cooperating and not fighting him! Maybe Thranduil even wanted to be taken care of? "We will reach Minas Tirith in one week and then you will meet your grandson for the very first time. He is a delight – and a handful," said Haldir, smiling wickedly. "I reckon he takes more after you than after Legolas and I combined!" Haldir's heart warmed, seeing the smile that now appeared on Thranduil's face. "Don't you dare give up on yourself, Ada. You still have a lot to fight and live for!"

Thranduil obediently ate more of the broth and the in the warm liquid soaked bread. He was finally beginning to feel warm again, and together with that warmth, his ability to think rationally returned. It finally dawned on him that he had almost surrendered to death; that he had almost deserted his family. But his grief and longing for Remmen had been all-consuming, and even now he wondered how to continue to live.

Haldir read some of Thranduil's emotions in the surprisingly lucid eyes. The emerald, green color was slowly returning to the irises, which assured him they had been in time to reclaim the elder Elf. "Give yourself time to grow strong again. You are weak from grief now, but you will continue to grow stronger."

Thranduil managed a weak smile, touched by Haldir's concern for him. For the first time in moons, he felt sleepy and his eyes were actually closing.

"Yes, give in to sleep, Ada. It is a healing sleep." Haldir gently maneuvered Thranduil onto his side, and then gestured for Rúmil to join them as well. Thranduil was in Haldir's strong arms and the march warden held his charge as close as possible, watching the deep lines grow shallow and relaxed in sleep. Thranduil shivered, and Rúmil lay down behind the Woodland Elf, spooning himself behind his charge. Thusly cocooned – feeling warm and secure – Thranduil finally surrendered to sleep.

Celeborn paced his private quarters, terribly missing Galadriel's company. They had seldom been apart during these last few millennia, and letting her leave for Valinor was one of the hardest things he would ever do. But Galadriel yearned to be reunited with her loved ones – her daughter in particular – and he felt it was unfair to ask her to stay.

But that left him lonely – a feeling he was hardly accustomed to. Feeling caged inside these four walls, he quickly opened the door and fled this section of the building. He found himself heading for the gardens, where he found Elrond and Lindir, sitting quietly on a bench, holding hands and whispering softly. He managed to remain hidden from their view, and watched them a moment longer.

He didn't begrudge Elrond his new love. He had seen the half-Elf grieve when Celebrían had been injured and eventually had left for Valinor. Like Galadriel wouldn't begrudge him a new lover, Celebrían wouldn't begrudge Elrond his.

But seeing them so happy fed his loneliness and he quickly continued on. Not in the mood for meeting more love birds, he headed for a more secluded part of the gardens. But he didn't have any luck and ran into Erestor and Glorfindel next, who were tending to their section of the gardens. One look at them told him they were desperately in love again. Any troubles they might have had where gone now.

He managed to keep back a growl of frustration and left the gardens behind him, heading for the forest instead. He ventured deep inside the forest and found comfort in the fact that the trees were telling him tales, inviting him to sit within their branches and to listen to his pain. His first reaction was to ignore them, but in the end he gave in, and sought out an ancient oak tree. Quickly climbing it, he settled against a heavy and strong branch, leaning his back against the trunk of the tree. Listening to the trees' chatter, his heart calmed down and he began to feel something akin to inner peace again.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 4

Making his way through the gardens after spending most of the day listening to the trees, Celeborn happened upon Legolas and Remmen, who were also on their way back to their rooms. Since Legolas and he had talked very little, he now saw an opportunity for conversation. "It was a beautiful day, wasn't it?"

Legolas, who only now noticed the Elf-Lord's presence, nodded quickly. He had been lost in thought, his musings with his fathers instead on focusing on his surroundings. Remmen was asleep, cradled easily against his chest. "But it won't be long before autumn will make its presence known."

Celeborn smiled at the sleeping baby. "I wish Celebrían had been that easy to handle, but she used to cry a lot during the first years of her life."

"The only time Remmen cries is when he is hungry," revealed Legolas, looking dotingly at his firstborn. "He is a surprisingly sweet baby. I expected sleepless nights, filled with crying, but he sleeps through most of them."

"You are very fortunate then." Celeborn studied Remmen's face, relaxed in sleep. "I recognize some of Haldir's features."

Legolas smiled warmly. "So do I." His gaze shifted from his son to Celeborn. "We seldom talked in the past. I recall only one occasion and that was when my father sent me to 'Lorien after my coming of age. He felt I should meet the rulers of the Golden Wood."

Celeborn nodded. "Your father and I didn't part on good terms after the Battle of the Last Alliance. When we went separate ways, he was embittered because he was only leading a small percentage of his people home."

"He never spoke ill of you," added Legolas when they had finally left the gardens and stepped into the corridor. "But I did hear echoes of regret in his voice."

"We were friends once," volunteered Celeborn. "But communication eventually stopped. I haven't seen Thranduil for three millennia." And oddly enough he realized he was looking forward to hopefully rekindling their lost friendship. "The last time I sent him a message was after Remmen died. I offered to visit with him, but he never sent a reply. I gathered that was his way of telling me not to meddle with his affairs."

Legolas sighed deeply. "My father wasn't coherent after Remmen died and a lot of messages remained unopened and unanswered. Our advisors did their best to deal with the situation, but chaos ensued. I doubt your message went unanswered on purpose."

"I hoped something like that had happened," he explained, seeing Legolas' puzzled look. "For that means he might still want to talk to me." Haldir had told him about his journey to Mirkwood to collect Thranduil, and Celeborn curiously asked, "Do you think Haldir will succeed in bringing your father here? If memory serves me right, Thranduil never left Mirkwood after returning from the Battle of the Last Alliance."

"My father has greatly changed over the last three millennia." Legolas opened the door to his rooms and stepped inside, gesturing for Celeborn to follow. It was important to him that the elder Elf learned more about Thranduil. His father needed to see friendly faces upon his arrival. "And I greatly worry about him. His mourning has taken on unhealthy proportions. I worry he will fade after all."

"And that is why Haldir won't take no for an answer." Celeborn had wondered about Haldir's determination to bring Thranduil back with him. "Your father has a friend in me, if he desires it."

"I will tell him," said Legolas, giving Celeborn a blinding smile.

Realizing the time had come to give Legolas and Remmen some privacy, Celeborn excused himself and headed for his own rooms. His short conversation with Legolas had given him lots to think about.

Ithil had risen for a second time since they had taken to the road and Haldir again called for a halt. The three brothers quickly divided all tasks and it was agreed that Rúmil would go hunting whilst Orophin stood guard. That arrangement gave Haldir plenty of time to study Thranduil and to try to engage the remarkably silent Woodland Elf in conversation.

"You seem more alert this eve," said Haldir offering Thranduil the water skin that Elrond had filled with miruvor before the three brothers had set out for Mirkwood. The half-Elf had thought it might aid Thranduil's recovery and Haldir now saw to it that the Woodland King drank one cup each day. The strong wine had already put some color back on the haggard looking face.

"I feel more alert," confirmed Thranduil softly, no longer stuttering. "But I still feel cold." The warm riding cloak did little to ward off the cold emanating from within his soul.

Haldir reacted to hearing those words and moved closer to Thranduil, sharing his body heat with the recovering Elf. Handing his charge a slice of bread and cheese, he watched Thranduil munch slowly. "Hopefully Rúmil will catch some game." Thranduil needed something more substantial than broth and bread.

Thranduil nodded absentmindedly, still nibbling on the food. "Would you tell me about my grandson? And Legolas, of course." He cast an insecure look at Haldir. "I never wanted to desert them. The grief just took me."

Haldir nodded reassuringly. "Legolas is well. The birth went without complications and we now have a beautiful baby boy. Legolas called him Remmen." Haldir sucked in his breath, seeing the little color leave Thranduil's face again. Hadn't he mentioned his son's name before? "Legolas chose the name to honor his father."

"He shouldn't have done that." Thranduil quickly sipped more miruvor. Gingerly, his eyes sought out Haldir's. "The child deserves a better name. Not a name that belongs to one of the dead."

"Aiya," said Haldir, sighing deeply. Thranduil's pain felt very real to him and he reached out, wrapping an arm around the fragile form beside him. "Think of it as a way to restore life to your former mate. This way we will always remember him."

Tears made their way down Thranduil's face. "I cannot stop mourning his passing and it has become so much worse since Legolas and you left."

"But you will shortly be reunited with Legolas." Haldir gently raised Thranduil's face to make eye contact with the elder Elf. "And once Legolas and I decide to settle down somewhere, you are more than welcome to stay with us. We want you in our lives."

"Are you sure?" Thranduil frowned. "I understand that my son wants me close, but don't you consider me a hassle? A nuisance?"

"Never." Haldir wiped the last, remaining tears from Thranduil's cheeks. "You have become very dear to me." Hoping Thranduil felt more at ease now, Haldir urged his charge to eat more of the bread. "Rúmil, you had better catch something tonight!"

About half an hour later, Rúmil returned, carrying three dead rabbits with him. He sat down, cleaned them and then prepared them over the fire. They seldom ate meat, but at times the weaker specimens needed to be taken out for the stronger ones to flourish.

Casting a probing look at Haldir and Thranduil, he found his brother tightly holding the Woodland Elf. He had never realized just how close a family the three of them had become – Legolas, Thranduil and Haldir. Haldir had seldom called Celeborn father, and to hear Haldir call Thranduil father instead was a strange thing. But he accepted their bonding like his brothers had accepted his love for Mithrandir.

"Here, eat this." Rúmil had put the most succulent and nourishing pieces of meat into a bowl and now handed it to Thranduil, who gingerly accepted it.

Thranduil didn't feel comfortable eating the best parts and wanted to object, but Rúmil's and Haldir's gaze stopped him from doing so, and he started to eat. His body reacted at once, crying out for more once he had finished his helping.

A loud growl, emanating from Thranduil's still partly empty stomach echoed through the night and made Rúmil smile knowingly. "Here, eat more, as you are still hungry." He had refilled the bowl and handed it once more to Thranduil.

"I cannot eat more. What about the three of you?"

"My brothers and I are healthy and can easily live on bread, fruit and cheese, but you cannot," replied Haldir sternly. "And now eat."

Realizing they wouldn't accept no from him, Thranduil resigned himself to the situation and enjoyed the food. "Haldir? What does my grandson look like?"

"He has my eyes – according to Legolas – and his golden hair," said Haldir, smiling warmly. "You are a grandfather now."

Thranduil's still weak smile gained a bit more radiance. "Grandfather… Haldir, I do want to meet my grandson. Don't let me fade, do you hear me?"

"I vow that you will reach Minas Tirith alive and that your health will continue to improve. Put your faith in me."

Thranduil tiredly rested his head on Haldir's shoulder, vowing to find a way to finally let Remmen go. It was time to let go of the past and embrace the present.

"The foul creature breathed hot, withering fire, and its pointy tail lashed out at us! Ecthelion moved quickly and took out one of those accursed Balrogs, but there were still more monsters left, and we—"

"Glorfindel!" Erestor arched an eyebrow, wondering about the appropriateness of Glorfindel's tale. Remmen promptly cried out in displeasure and Erestor privately cursed himself for interrupting the tale; apparently Remmen had enjoyed listening to Glorfindel's voice. "Maybe you should tell him something more suitable."

"Oh, I could tell him about the battle we fought at the slopes of Mount Orodruin, when we fought Sauron!" Glorfindel's eyes twinkled with mischief.

"Gagaga…!" Remmen cried out again, and his tiny hands reached for Glorfindel's tunic. The blond was seated in the rocking chair, rocking him slowly and he wanted to hear that golden voice again! Why had it stopped?

"No more bloodshed, please," requested Erestor, who quickly fetched the bottled milk in case Remmen was hungry again. "And for the Valar's sake! Talk to him!"

Glorfindel gave Erestor a wicked grin. "I never thought you would order me to talk, my love."

"Oh, I will never hear the end of this!" Erestor joined Glorfindel, and offered Remmen the milk, but the baby refused to drink, staring at the golden-haired Elda instead.

"Ecthelion took out three of them; one after the other. Gondolin trembled on its fundaments when a new attack was launched. One of the dratted creatures cornered me! I had to take him out, you understand that, don't you?" Glorfindel was so caught up in his story-telling that he didn't notice the fact that Erestor's eyes were growing misty with tears. Remmen, who stared at him with big eyes, was slightly drooling, and the chubby fingers had wrapped themselves deeply in the fabric of his tunic. "I took him out, but—" Glorfindel stopped, shocked to hear Erestor choke back a sob. "Love? What?"

Erestor's swimming eyes met Glorfindel's brilliant ones. "I never realized that… that you… Did you know… How did it feel?"

"Death?" Glorfindel's voice radiated calm and understanding. Remmen thankfully remained quiet, and Glorfindel managed to take hold of Erestor's hand, pulling his beloved close. "I wouldn't recommend it."

Erestor leaned in closer and pressed a possessive kiss on Glorfindel's lips. "Don't you ever die again; you hear me?"

"I hear you," said Glorfindel, a wicked sparkle returning to his azure eyes. "Love? I think Remmen needs changing. The story must have been too exciting for such a young Elfling."

Erestor's nose caught the foul scent and he moved away. "You 'entertained' him… You change him."

"Ah, love of my life, I am so glad we cannot have any children. We would be lousy parents." Although it was fun to sit with Remmen for a few hours whilst Legolas slept, he was glad he could return the Elfling to Legolas when their time was up.

"He loves to listen to you when you tell tales," said Erestor warmly.

Glorfindel grinned. "Let's change the little handful together. I will undertake the dangerous operation of removing the dirty diaper, whilst you move in with a clean cloth to wipe his bum and then we will apply a clean diaper together. Between the two of us we should manage to carry out this perilous mission."

"That sounds very dangerous indeed, but I will face this mortal danger for your sake." Erestor stared deeply into his beloved's azure eyes and kissed him again. This time, Remmen cooed happily – approvingly - from between them, giving their kiss his seal of approval.

Rúmil's eyes narrowed, wondering what Thranduil was hiding beneath his cape. They had traveled during the day and now that night was upon them, they would rest. Although it was Haldir who spent most of his time with Thranduil, his oldest brother had insisted he stood watch tonight, so his brothers could rest. That left him in charge of Thranduil, as Orophin was out hunting.

Thranduil looked up at Rúmil from where he was seated and pulled his riding cloak closer. He preferred having Haldir close, but knew all three brothers were worried about him and intent on caring for him.

"What do you have there?" Rúmil sat down beside Thranduil and stirred their little fire, which had been about to die. Between the green of Thranduil's cloak, he saw something red – or brown. He studied Thranduil, trying to determine the nature of the hidden object.

A soft hiss escaped from within the confines of Thranduil's cloak and the head of a fox poked out, giving Rúmil a displeased look.

"A fox?" Rúmil smiled warmly. Each day spent with Thranduil proved to be a new challenge. "Where did you find him?" The animal was still young – a cub. "Shouldn't he be with his mother?"

"He was alone when I came upon him. I do hope his mother will come back for him." In the meantime he had taken the animal under his wing.

Rúmil teasingly said, "You still have those mothering instincts, don't you?"

Thranduil's eyes darkened momentarily, but he then realized Rúmil was merely teasing him. He had to grow used to being teased again. He had dwelt in darkness for so long!

Rúmil continued, "Carrying Legolas and giving birth to him must have been quite the experience. Except for Legolas and you I don't know of another male who ever carried a child to term."

"It is a gift – or a curse," said Thranduil, gently petting the fox's warm body. "My grandfather viewed it as a curse, but my father didn't and neither do I. It is a gift."

Rúmil moistened his lips, wondering how personal Thranduil would allow this conversation to become. "Your condition is improving. When we found you, we were worried we had come too late."

"I gave into the darkness of my grief and allowed it to consume me. I had reached a point where I just wanted to die. I had completely forgotten about Legolas. He had written he was pregnant, but the fact somehow never registered." Sudden movement to his right revealed a fox, and Thranduil released the cub, which immediately headed for his mother. "Be safe," whispered Thranduil, smiling at the two animals as they disappeared from view.

Rúmil also smiled, and offered Thranduil his daily cup of miruvor. They would eat later, once Orophin rejoined them, but he already handed the recovering Elf some bread as well. "You can soak it in the miruvor if you want, but you are eating that."

Thranduil smiled. "At times you sound like Legolas."

"I must admit you surprised me the first time we met. I had heard these tales about an arrogant King, and you proved them all wrong."

"I will take that as a compliment then." Thranduil dipped the bread into the miruvor and munched on it. "I had a part in letting those rumors grow. I isolated myself, and the only communication that took place was through my advisors and Legolas."

Rúmil gave the elder Elf a wistful smile. "You have buried yourself in your past too long. It is time to face the presence."

"I know that." Thranduil had finished the bread and now emptied the cup. "And I am trying – hard. But it is difficult."

"Maybe it is a good thing then that we are traveling to Minas Tirith. A new environment, new faces and the presence of your son and grandson might work wonders."

"I hope so," admitted Thranduil in a weary voice. "I am so tired of living in the past – of being alone."

"You are no longer alone," said Rúmil, finally reaching out to place a hand on Thranduil's shoulder and squeezing gently. "You are with your family now."

Erestor managed to carry out his father's suggestion and channeled the fire he had created, until it was situated in the palm of his hand. It was becoming easier to manipulate the fire, and Mithrandir's guidance ensured no one was hurt in the process. "I think I can control it."

"The fire, yes," confirmed Mithrandir, carefully probing his son's eyes, which were alive with fire. "But what about your other powers?"

"What other powers?" Erestor's big eyes fastened on his father. "Don't tell me I have more powers!"

"I am referring to the fact that you can farspeak with anyone you choose and your ability to guide others in this way. Do you still maintain your link with Glorfindel?"

"It has grown even stronger," admitted Erestor. "I feel his presence – his love for me – constantly."

They were seated on a bench, enjoying Arien's last rays for the day. Father and son enjoyed spending time with each other and both wished they had known millennia ago they were related. "Am I right to assume that you and Glorfindel have sorted out the last of your problems and are truly happy?" Mithrandir had seen them work in their little garden and had sensed an intense feeling of belonging, seeing them together.

Erestor blushed weakly. "Yes, we have."

"But?"

"I still need to grow accustomed to his charming new self. It feels like he never stopped wooing me. Every day he tries to win my heart all over again – though it already belongs to him."

"And that is a bad thing?" Mithrandir gave his son a probing look.

"He never acted like that in the past and… I am afraid it will stop."

Mithrandir arched an eyebrow. "Erestor?"

"I like the fact that he tries to woo me anew each day, although that still takes some getting used to – but at the same time, I love it when he pays me that much attention. I crave it. I am not sure how I will react when he takes that away from me."

"Did you tell him that?" Erestor's answer would show if trust between them had really been established.

"I did." Erestor's blush actually deepened. "And he proceeded to ensure me that he would never stop wooing me."

Mithrandir smiled. "Glorfindel has finally realized how much pleasure can be found in making you happy. Let him."

Erestor nodded once. "And then there is Magolion. I don't know how to react to him." His brother had tried making amends whenever possible, but he still didn't trust the elder Elf. "I still feel he can turn on me and lash out at me the moment I least expect it."

"That will take time, yes," agreed Mithrandir, "Magolion is trying to win your trust and you should give him a chance to prove himself." But he also knew how difficult it was for Erestor to give Magolion that chance. "Magolion has won Elrohir's heart. Do you really think Elrohir is fooled that easily?"

"Elrohir is a good judge of people, but I also know how devious Magolion is."

"Was," corrected Mithrandir, wondering if he could help his son accept the fact that Magolion had changed. "He risked his life for you in Sauron's keep."

"Yes, he did. But I still don't know why."

Mithrandir had seen Magolion's approach, but had chosen not to reveal his presence to Erestor. Signaling for the other Elf to step up to them, he clasped Erestor's hand in his. "Why don't you ask him?"

Alarmed at finding Magolion standing in front of him, Erestor tried to rise from the bench, but Mithrandir stopped him. Reluctantly, he remained seated. He would have preferred to look Magolion in the eye, instead of having to look up at him.

"Yes, why don't you ask me?" Magolion forced his heart to beat slower. It had sped up hearing the last lines of their conversation.

"I asked you that question before," said Erestor in a defensive tone.

"Try again."

Erestor bit his bottom lip and forced out the question. "Why did you risk your life for me?"

"Because…" Magolion frowned, searching for the right words. Before answering Erestor, he sat down on the grass, realizing Erestor felt uncomfortable having to look up at him. "Because Elrohir taught me about brotherly love. Until I met Elladan and Elrohir I had no idea what it meant to be the elder brother. I learned its importance by watching Elrohir and Elladan interact. It took me a while – as I was too busy sorting out my thoughts – but I then realized I wanted that with you as well. I had changed and couldn't stand by and watch you die. I had to do something, even if the act would demand my life. Elrohir has taught me well."

"You want that with me?" Erestor stared at Magolion in disbelief. "But you hate me!"

"I hated you – past tense," said Magolion, correcting his brother. "And it wasn't really you I hated. I hated Nana, and Mithrandir to some degree, but it was easier to direct that hatred toward you." He drew in a deep breath, and encouraged by Mithrandir's approving look, he continued, "I hurt you in the past. I hurt you in many ways and many times and I understand you cannot just forgive me and move on. All I want is a chance. A single chance to prove myself to you."

Mithrandir cast a probing glance at Erestor, realizing his son was busy searching Magolion's thoughts for the lies in them. Instead, his son only encountered truth. That shocked Erestor and Mithrandir gently rubbed his son's knuckles, feeling the impact that realization had on Erestor.

Erestor stared at his brother in disbelief. Magolion was speaking the truth. His brother really wanted to make amends and build a relationship. It was only fair to tell him that their time to do so was very limited. "I won't sail for Valinor. Glorfindel and I will stay."

Magolion and Mithrandir gave Erestor a surprised look. "You will stay?" Mithrandir hadn't expected his son to stay. "Why?"

"I am not ready yet to sail. My heart tells me to stay." Erestor looked pleadingly at his father. "My time hasn't come yet."

Mithrandir's gaze grew troubled. "But you will sail for the Undying Lands one day?"

"I think so. Maybe after Aragon's passing. I just cannot leave yet."

"Then our time is limited here," realized Magolion, "But I still want to try. Will you spend some time with me tomorrow?"

Erestor considered his brother's request and studied the other's eyes for a long time. "Yes, I will."

Magolion smiled, relieved that Erestor was giving him this chance to prove himself. He vowed not to let his brother down.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 5

Thranduil managed to dismount unaided – a first since they had left Mirkwood. They had been traveling for one week now and Haldir expected them to reach Minas Tirith tomorrow evening. The thought of being reunited with Legolas thrilled Thranduil, but he still worried he would be considered a burden – in spite of Haldir's assurances that they loved having him close.

Haldir had called for a stop when his brothers had expressed their desire to go swimming in the stream they had come upon, and after seeing Thranduil's hopeful look, he had agreed.

Rúmil and Orophin were already in the process of undressing, after having seen to their horses' needs. The two brothers then ran into the water and began splashing one another. Haldir smiled, still standing on the shore, taking his time to undress. To his surprise, he found Thranduil had entered the water already, and by the smile on his face he was clearly enjoying the feel of the cool water against his skin. The Woodland Elf was careful to stay immersed most of the time – that way his still too skinny body wouldn't draw any concerned looks. But Haldir knew Thranduil was on the road to recovery and that the elder Elf needed time to put some proper meat onto his bones and wouldn't have mentioned it. But Thranduil didn't know that.

Finally naked as well, Haldir joined his brothers and promptly found himself chased by them. At times he wondered if his brothers would ever grow up, but at the same time he had to admit he loved their carefree spirit. Whilst wrestling Rúmil – and winning of course – he kept one eye on Thranduil, who remained at a distance, obviously not wanting to infringe on what the Woodland Elf thought was family bantering.

Haldir thanked the Valar when his brothers finally calmed down and settled for floating on the water and teasing the curious fish that had swum up to them. He headed for Thranduil instead. The elder Elf had left the water and had wrapped himself in his riding cloak. Sitting down next to the elder Elf on the grass, he wrung the water from his long, silver hair and then combed through it using his fingers. "You must be looking forward to seeing Legolas and Remmen."

Thranduil nodded. "But I still have to grow accustomed to my grandson's name. I never expected Legolas to choose that name for his son."

"You didn't?" Haldir frowned, whilst braiding his hair into a single, loose plait. "Why? You must know how much he loved Remmen."

"I do, but I still didn't expect him to name his son Remmen." Thranduil buried deeper into the folds on his riding cloak. "It took me aback."

Haldir studied Thranduil closely, and was relieved to see that the once dull and blank expression had completely vanished. The sparkle had returned to the emerald eyes, which were alert again. It was amazing what a week on the road had done for Thranduil. What the grieving Elf needed was attention and some tender, loving care. Legolas had always been the one to supply that affection, but with the Prince taking part in the Fellowship and later on staying in Minas Tirith, Thranduil had begun to fade again.

Thranduil swallowed hard and then gave Haldir a probing look. "Who else is staying in Minas Tirith?"

"Elrond and—" Haldir paused, hearing Thranduil's sharp intake of breath. "It is my understanding that you haven't talked to him since the battle at Mount Orodruin?"

"We parted on bad terms," acknowledged Thranduil in concern. "Maybe I can avoid dealing with him."

"I doubt that very much." Seeing Thranduil's wondering expression, he said, "Elrond is a renowned healer and Legolas would feel more comfortable if Elrond examined you. The Peredhel did supervise his pregnancy and successfully delivered Remmen, thusly earning his trust."

Thranduil's gaze was darkening, realizing Elrond would confront him. The half-Elf had never been one for avoidance; Elrond preferred to deal with problems head on. "Who else?"

"Lord Celeborn arrived a few weeks ago." Haldir smiled fondly, but the smile froze on his face seeing Thranduil's startled expression. "You cannot possibly hold a grudge against him! He is my father, for Elbereth's sake! He raised me! I *know* he is a good person!" Haldir automatically came to Celeborn's defense.

Thranduil smiled sorrowfully at Haldir, hating to see his son in law torn in loyalty. "I haven't spoken to them for over 3000 years. I blamed them for my father's death."

"Do you still?"

Thranduil shrugged. "I don't really know. At the time, I was convinced they were to blame, together with Ereinion, but I am not so certain anymore. I loved my father, but I also know he tended to act rashly and recklessly. He…" Talking about Oropher caused an old pain to wake again inside him. "He meant the world to me."

Haldir thought he understood. Oropher had been Thranduil's mother and father – his everything. "What will you do when you meet Elrond and Celeborn?"

"I will try to act politely, but I am not certain I will succeed, Haldir. I refused to deal with them for three millennia." Thranduil brushed a damp strand out of his face and smiled, watching as Rúmil and Orophin tried to catch some fish – their dinner. "I will feel out of place there – I already do. I ruled Mirkwood, now I am just a visitor."

Haldir shook his head. "Legolas has won Aragorn's affection and friendship, and the King of Gondor will treat you with the utmost respect. You will be a most honored guest."

"Ah, yes, Aragorn. Or Elessar, as he is known among his people. Legolas told me about him in his letters. I know they have become good friends." Thranduil pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them. Staring at the water – and the two splashing Elves – he added, "I am afraid, Haldir. This is the first time in over three millennia that I left my home and I am headed for alien lands."

Haldir gave Thranduil a wistful smile. "Why not see it as finally coming home? Coming home to your family and friends of old, whom you grew alienated from. Why not see this as a chance to bury the past and move on?"

Thranduil returned the smile. "It is hard for me to see it that way, but I will try."

"And who knows," whispered Haldir into Thranduil's ear, "maybe the Valar will grace you with a new love?" Haldir was surprised to see Thranduil grow pale. "Do you remember that night beneath the stars? You wished you would find a new love."

Thranduil closed his eyes. "I already lost my beloved, Haldir. True love only finds you once in a lifetime. Not twice – never twice."

"I beg to differ." Haldir caressed Thranduil's face and waited for the swimming, green eyes to open again. "You deserve another chance at love and I am convinced the Valar will grant you one." A single tear escaped Thranduil's eyes, which Haldir caught between his fingertips. "Don't ever give up, Ada."

Thranduil's jaw set firmly with newly found determination. If Haldir believed in him, he couldn't do less.

"Sire? The border sentries report that Haldir's group has been sighted. They are expected to arrive at sunset." The soldier bowed respectfully and then left the room after delivering this news to his King.

Aragorn immediately caught the brilliant shine born in his friend's azure eyes at hearing this news. "We will welcome them together, Legolas," he offered, "and dinner will be served upon their arrival in your private rooms." For Legolas' sake he hoped that Thranduil had agreed to come to Minas Tirith.

"Do you think…?" Legolas didn't dare finish his sentence. What if Thranduil had denied him and had stayed in Mirkwood instead? But the Elves were leaving for Valinor, and eventually Thranduil would be all alone in his realm.

"I hope so." Aragorn smiled warmly at Legolas, who was seated on the floor on a warm, thick fur together with his son. Remmen was reaching out with his tiny hands, and cooed happily when Legolas picked him up. "Remmen is a true delight and your father should get to know his grandson."

Legolas was beginning to feel nervous now that Haldir's group had been sighted. He had to wait several hours to finally find out if his father was with them and that knowledge caused his stomach to do some nauseating somersaults. Haldir had promised him that he wouldn't fail, but he also knew how stubborn his father could be.

Elrond – who still regularly checked on his former patient – stepped into the room to see how Legolas and Remmen fared and instantly noticed the golden-haired Elf's excited state. "Legolas? Shouldn't you be resting? Maybe you overestimated your strength and—"

Legolas cut him short. "Haldir will arrive during the evening and I pray to the Valar that my father is with him."

Until now Elrond hadn't really considered how to approach Thranduil, but he was now forced to do so. "Celeborn and I should be there to welcome your father." Hopefully showing Thranduil they were willing to rebuild an old friendship would be the first step in the right direction. "I will inform Celeborn."

Legolas nodded once and felt slightly relieved now that Elrond was gone. Looking at Aragorn, he whispered, "What if he stayed in Mirkwood?"

"I feel confident that Thranduil heeded your request to come visit with you." Aragorn leaned in closer and rested a hand on Legolas' shoulder. "From your stories, I gather that he greatly loves you and that he is a kind, if somewhat stubborn Elf. He will want to get to know your son."

Legolas drew in a deep breath and then sighed. "I hope you are right."

The fact that Erestor grew tense and rigged when they met for their first walk, made Magolion nervous in turn. He understood that it took Erestor time to understand and accept that he had changed, and he felt thankful that his younger brother was giving him this opportunity to prove himself. But the silence between them was becoming uncomfortable and Magolion was desperately thinking of something to say.

"I suppose I should properly thank you for saving my life," said Erestor, breaking the silence first. "I never expected you to act in that way."

"I have changed," said Magolion, cocking his head to study Erestor's wary expression. "Elrond started the process but Elrohir helped me finish it. Without him, I wouldn't have made it. I would probably have resorted to my old ways if it hadn't been for Elrohir's love. He supported me and even more importantly – he believed in me." Magolion wondered if his next remark was still appropriate, but he went ahead anyway. "Much like you believed in Glorfindel after all the pain he caused you. Glorfindel wouldn't have made it either without your love."

Erestor took his time to consider Magolion's words. He couldn't deny there was a measure of truth to them. "Whenever I look at you, I am reminded of the older brother that laughed at me and sent me away when I came to him for comfort. The brother that hurt Lindir and tried to take Glorfindel away from me."

Magolion swallowed hard; knowing he had to acknowledge the vile role he had played in the past. "After seeing Elladan and Elrohir interact, I regret that I never was the big brother you so badly needed. I was so focused on my own pain and worries that I never realized you didn't have the same tools I had to fight off the pain. You were an Elfling and I had already reached majority. I should have stepped in there to stop any bullying. I should have been the one you came running to when you were hurting."

Erestor quickly turned his head away. He didn't want Magolion to see the tears that had formed in his dark eyes. "I really wanted that - a brother - a real brother. I still want it."

"You do?" That admission surprised Magolion and he halted in his tracks. Realizing that Erestor was refusing to look at him, he moved until he stood in front of his younger brother. The tears that still leaked from Erestor's eyes touched his heart, and he gingerly reached out – uncertain if his touch was welcome and would be accepted by the hurting Elf.

Erestor involuntarily held his breath, feeling Magolion's fingertips hesitantly caress his face. He almost took a step away from the other Elf, but forced himself to stay in place and accept the touch. If he really wanted to give Magolion his chance he had to face his own fears as well. "I am afraid that you will betray me after I give you my trust. You hurt me so deeply, so many times in the past that it is difficult for me to allow you in."

The expression in Erestor's eyes told Magolion that his brother was being completely honest with him and he appreciated that. "I don't expect you to simply trust me, Erestor. The fact that we are here, discussing this, is the first step we need to take. Things will get easier from this moment on."

"Do you really think so?" Erestor also realized that this conversation was an important step and wondered if they really had a chance to build some sort of brotherly relationship. The Valar knew he had always wanted one with Magolion. There was still a part of the Elfling left in him who had always craved a big, protective brother. "I am afraid to try," he admitted honestly.

"So am I," confessed Magolion. "I know that this is my last chance and that letting you down will cost me greatly. I won't repeat past mistakes; please believe me."

"I want to believe you – I really do." The Valar help him, but he did! Magolion then gave him a weak, hopeful smile, and his last resistance melted away inside him. Magolion would get his chance to be his big brother, but if Magolion failed, Erestor promised himself to never give his brother a chance again.

It was hard to say who was the most nervous concerning the upcoming meeting with Thranduil. It *was* easy to say who was the most excited though; Legolas. He constantly shuffled his feet, shifted Remmen in his arms, and continued to scan the horizon, eager to catch a first glimpse of the party about to arrive. Finally, four forms appeared on the road, and it felt like a gigantic burden had been lifted from his shoulders, realizing there were four and not just three riders. "Haldir kept his word," he whispered absentmindedly, at which Remmen yawned and began to drift off into sleep.

Next to Legolas stood Aragorn and Arwen, holding hands. They were happy to see Legolas' hopes come true.

Mithrandir's gaze already searched for his lover's features and finding Rúmil smiling at him, he felt relieved. Ever since admitting his feelings to the silver-haired Elf, he was afraid of losing him.

Elladan had also joined them, eager to be reunited with Orophin. How he had missed his mate!

At Legolas' other side stood Elrond, who still felt responsible for Legolas' health. Although two weeks had passed since Legolas had given birth, he still kept a close eye on his charge. But currently his interest lay with the slightly slumped forward form seated in front of Haldir. He was surprised to find that Thranduil wasn't riding his own horse, and was sharing Haldir's instead.

Celeborn wondered about the same thing, and his eyes narrowed, finding Thranduil pale and fragile looking. His instincts warned him that Thranduil was weaker than he appeared, and his heart went out to the other ruler. They had been close friends once and it still pained him that they had stopped being friends after the Battle of the Last Alliance. Hopefully, he would now get a chance to rebuild that friendship.

Impatience and eagerness to be reunited with his father overwhelmed Legolas and he started toward the riders. "Ada!" After giving Haldir a grateful look, he walked over to his father, who was dismounting and heading toward him. Overjoyed at having Thranduil close once more, Legolas literally threw himself into his father's arms, holding Remmen close.

Thranduil reacted instinctively and opened his arms to receive Legolas and his grandson into them. He didn't know when he had started to cry, but tears dripped from his face, as his arms buried Legolas and Remmen in a hug. "I missed you so much!"

Haldir exchanged a pleased smile with Aragorn and Elrond and then dismounted as well. Staying close to Legolas, he waited patiently for the emotional storm to calm down.

Rúmil and Orophin slid off the backs of their horses and joined their lovers, exchanging kisses and hugs. They then excused themselves to give their lovers their full attention.

Aragorn, who had pulled Arwen into his arms, smiled warmly. Seeing Legolas happy, made him happy. "Welcome to Minas Tirith, King Thranduil."

Thranduil nodded absentmindedly and mumbled a thank you, but all he had eyes for were his son and grandson. Looking into Remmen's hazel eyes for the first time, it was obvious the little one had inherited those big, curious eyes from Haldir. But the first hairs were golden – Legolas' heritage. "He is beautiful."

Legolas smiled, giddily. "I am so happy you decided to come here, Ada. Haldir vowed he would bring you here, but I was too afraid to believe he would succeed." Now that he was finally getting a closer look at his father, his worries reappeared and deepened, seeing the fragile state Thranduil was in. "Ada, are you fading – again?"

Thranduil shook his head. "Not any more. I was grieving heavily when Haldir arrived, but the depressing feeling has faded since then."

Aragorn was content to watch the reunion and patiently waited for the moment Thranduil would be ready to greet him in turn. The moment also offered him a chance to study Thranduil and he was taken aback by the uncanny resemblance between Legolas and his father. The only thing that set them apart was their eye color. He knew Thranduil was as old as Elrond was, a bit younger than Celeborn, but the Woodland Elf could have been Legolas' twin brother. It also gave Thranduil a strange kind of vulnerability, which he couldn't place.

"May I hold him?" Thranduil carefully accepted Remmen into his arms and rocked the baby, who had woken again and was now staring at Thranduil with big eyes.

"I named him Remmen," said Legolas, only now wondering if that name would cause his father pain. He had never considered the name could have a negative effect on Thranduil.

"Haldir already told me," said Thranduil slowly, wondering if he should tell Legolas about his initial reaction to learning that name. "At first I was taken aback by your choice, but I have changed my mind since then. Your father would have approved, I am certain of that." Remmen's big eyes were pools of wonder and curiosity and Thranduil smiled warmly at the Elfling. "You are a sweet one."

Proudly, Legolas smiled. "He is a lovely baby." Seeing Thranduil hold his son and smile at Remmen warmed his heart. Aragorn cleared his throat and Legolas realized he should properly introduce his father. "Aragorn, this is my father, Thranduil."

Thranduil composed himself, but found it still hard to focus on anything else besides Remmen. Tearing his eyes away from the baby, he made eye contact with the King of Men. "Thank you for your hospitality, sire."

"There is no need for titles between us, I reckon – sire," Aragorn added teasingly, delighted to hear Arwen giggle at his remark. "Legolas is my dear friend and you are most welcome here."

"Thank you." Thranduil nodded, flattered that Aragorn had welcomed him personally. Next, his gaze shifted to Elrond and Celeborn; he wasn't certain how to react to their presence.

Celeborn sensed Thranduil's uncertainty and indecision and took the initiative. "It has been a long time since we talked last. I hope we will take up old habits and walk and talk during your stay here."

"Those are kind words," said Thranduil cautiously, "And I thank you for them."

"I also hope you will enjoy your stay here," added Elrond, "I am certain that Remmen is enough reason to stay for as long as possible."

Haldir, who had remained silent until now, stepped up to Legolas and kissed his husband. "We have a lot to discuss, my love." Giving Thranduil a look that said 'don't you dare revert back to mourning!' he gently stroked his son's face. "I won't be parted from the two of you again for a very long time."

Thranduil judged it best to hand Remmen to Haldir, who was dotingly looking at his firstborn. Remmen settled comfortably against his father's chest and slowly fell asleep again.

"Let me show you to your rooms," said Legolas, eagerly taking his father's hand in his. "Aragorn made sure they are next to mine."

"Dinner will be served in Legolas' rooms in thirty minutes. You must be hungry." Aragorn inclined his head in a temporary goodbye and guided Arwen back into the building.

Legolas began pulling Thranduil with him, and signaled for Haldir to follow them. He wanted his family to himself – his mate and his father.

That left Elrond and Celeborn standing alone in the courtyard. Elrond cleared his throat and when Celeborn headed for the doorway, he fell into step beside the elder Elf. Seeing Legolas' happiness had awoken his desire to be with Lindir all over again.

"He is weaker than he wants us to know," whispered Celeborn knowingly. "He always tried to hide his weaknesses and it always backfired on him."

"I must admit I never saw him in such a sorry state before. His hair used to shine like gold and now it is dull."

"Something tells me he was a lot worse when Haldir came upon him," said Celeborn, musing aloud. "I never realized he was fading – still grieving for Remmen. I should never have allowed for us to stop all contact. We were friends once, Elrond, the three of us. Now he feels like a stranger to me."

"I agree." Elrond looked Celeborn in the eyes. "Then we must change that and befriend him again."

Celeborn nodded. "Yes, befriending him is wise and advisable. But will he allow us close again?"

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 6

Haldir had briefly excused himself to give father and son a chance to talk in private and returned to his rooms to bathe and change his clothes. It felt good to have a moment of quiet, though after time went by he began to miss his husband's and Thranduil's presence.

In the meantime, Legolas showed Thranduil to his quarters. When his father sat down on the bed, he placed Remmen in Thranduil's arms, watching them. Sitting down beside his father, he studied him closely. "I almost lost you, didn't I? Haldir arrived just in time."

Thranduil immediately admitted the truth. "You are right, my son. I surrendered to my mourning. When Haldir found me I was more dead than alive." After moistening his lips, he continued, "When I finally realized what had happened to me, I was grateful that Haldir had taken me away from Remmen's tomb. Whilst we were on the road I began to feel alive again." He smiled weakly at Legolas. "I want to live for you and for my grandson. I have so much left to live for that I feel guilty for almost succumbing to grief."

"Don't feel guilty," said Legolas, loosely embracing his father. "I am glad you are alive and well – and here at my side."

Thranduil slowly rocked Remmen in his arms. "When I first heard that you had named him Remmen I didn't feel comfortable with that, but now I understand that this baby will keep his memory alive and I thank you for that."

"Why don't you rest for a while?" suggested Legolas, accepting Remmen into his arms again. "Dinner will be served in my rooms later. Take a bathe, freshen up. You have been on the road this last week."

"Is that your way of telling me that I reek of horse?" asked Thranduil, laughing amusedly. 

"No, but you should wash the grime of the road off of you." Legolas leaned in closer and placed a chaste kiss on his father's brow. "Thank you for coming here. I know you feel uncomfortable with Elrond and Celeborn close, but please trust me when I say that they mean well. They were also nervous to meet you after such a long time." After seeing his father nod, Legolas walked over to the doorway. "I will fetch you in time for dinner."

Thranduil let himself fall backward onto the bed after Legolas had closed the door behind him and his gaze swept across the room. He had been assigned luxurious rooms, but he still missed the freedom of living high up in his talan. However, these rooms were a lot better than the carved quarters deep within his caves. Now that he was here he just had to make the best of it. He would start with taking the bathe Legolas had suggested and then change into some clean clothes.

"What ails you, Celeborn?" Galadriel, who was directing her ladies in packing her belongings for her journey to Valinor, immediately noticed her husband's troubled expression.

"Thranduil has arrived." Celeborn's eyes narrowed in thought. "We almost lost him to grief - again - and we never noticed."

"But he is alive today, isn't he?" Galadriel momentarily deserted her task and guided Celeborn over to one of the couches, where they sat down. "Tell me why your heart feels burdened."

"We should have tried harder to restore contact after Remmen died. We took the easy way out when no reply came from Mirkwood."

"We did what we felt was right at the time," replied Galadriel, watching him closely. "But there is more."

"I want to rebuild our old friendship. We were close when we still lived in Doriath." Oropher had encouraged their friendship, and Celeborn had taken Thranduil under his wing for quite some time. "I miss being able to talk to him – walk with him. Why didn't I realize that before?" Questioning eyes sought out Galadriel's. "How do I gain his trust?"

"Slowly," said Galadriel, "slowly, and with much dedication." She hoped Celeborn and Thranduil would succeed in rebuilding their old relationship, for she was afraid her husband would feel lonely once she had left for Valinor. "If you really want to mend your friendship you will succeed."

Celeborn smiled at her, raised her hand and pressed a kiss onto the back of it. "I will always love you, my Lady."

"And I will always love you, but I also set your heart free to love again." She caressed a strand of his mithril hair. "We will part shortly and you will need friends – many good friends." Her ladies would travel with her, and so would her grandsons. It was Celeborn she was worried about. Watching him closely, she wondered if there was more to this sudden desire to befriend Thranduil, but she didn't ask that particular question. She had lost the right to do so when she had set him free.

"Eat!" said Haldir cheerfully. "Aragorn employs some of the best cooks in his kingdom!" The meal was truly exquisite and delicious, and he would make sure Thranduil ate his fill.

Thranduil started on the soup; knowing Haldir was keeping a close eye on him. "Legolas, I regret not being there for you during your pregnancy and delivery. I might have been able to support you."

Legolas shrugged his shoulders once and then nodded. "Having you at my side would have been nice. I didn't know what to expect, but thankfully Elrond monitored me closely and there were no complications."

Thranduil's smile was remarkably soft when he looked at his son. "And now you are a parent too."

Haldir smiled proudly. "I had a part in making him a parent," he said teasingly.

"A very big part." Legolas gave his husband a doting smile.

"Do you wish for more children?" Thranduil looked inquisitively at Haldir.

"As many as Legolas is willing to give me." Haldir had the grace to blush.

Legolas placed his hand on top of his husband's and gave it a tight squeeze. "I will most certainly enjoy making more Elflings."

Thranduil laughed warmly. "I can imagine!"

Haldir's blush deepened; Thranduil's teasing made him feel awkward, but when he looked at the elder Elf, he saw a hint of loneliness and longing in the emerald eyes and he was reminded that Thranduil *was* alone. A tempting idea then entered his thoughts. Surely, there was someone in Gondor who was interested in courting a wicked, Elven King?

The day of Arwen and Aragorn's wedding had finally arrived. Thranduil had only been in Minas Tirith for one day and now found formal robes on his bed upon his return to his rooms. Legolas had asked him to attend the ceremony and he had reluctantly given in. He would have preferred to stay clear of the crowd, but as Legolas was Aragorn's closest friend, he had to make an appearance.

"Legolas must have chosen these," he whispered absentmindedly, running his fingertips over the silk fabric. The robes were made of the deepest green, embroiled with silver leaves and lined with the softest green he had ever seen. They were truly fit to be worn by a King.

"You *are* attending the wedding, aren't you?" Haldir had followed Thranduil to make sure the elder Elf found the garment and changed his clothing. "Legolas would be disappointed if you stayed in your rooms whilst the whole of Gondor is feasting!"

"I will be there," promised Thranduil. "I am not looking forward to attending the ceremony, but I won't disappoint my son."

"Good." Haldir arched an eyebrow and wriggled it suggestively. "These robes will look good on you. You will definitely draw some attention."

"But I don't want to draw any," said Thranduil in a pleading tone. "I would prefer to blend in with the background."

Haldir then made a bold move. After walking up to Thranduil, he placed a finger beneath the other Elf's chin to raise it, and then looked into the emerald eyes. "You could never blend in with the background, Ada. You are unique and everyone who sees you has to acknowledge your presence. Who knows, maybe you will break some hearts, or cause them to beat faster with passion and desire. Maybe someone will fall in love with you."

Thranduil shivered momentarily. "Don't say such things."

"That night in which the stars fell down onto Arda you said you wanted someone to love and to love you back. You will never find that person if you hide from life."

"Maybe I have changed my mind since then."

"I doubt that," said Haldir thoughtfully. "I reckon you are afraid of what will happen should someone make his interest known in you."

Thranduil's mouth had gone dry. Haldir was right, but he couldn't admit that, could he? "Haldir, you are prejudiced in this matter. Do you really think anyone will look twice at my haggard face?"

"Don't do yourself such discredit, Ada. You are still Thranduil, and you know it." Haldir smiled warmly – even teasingly. "You will turn a lot of heads and maybe there will be one among them you find fair and interesting in turn?" Thranduil then gave him the oddest look. "Are you having cold feet, Ada?"

Thranduil swallowed hard, and then nodded. "Maybe." He had learned a long time ago to be very careful what he wished for.

"Then it is time to plunge into the deep," decided Haldir. "Legolas and I will be ready to join the festivities within the hour. We will meet with you here before leaving for the ceremony." That way they could make certain Thranduil would accompany them.

Realizing he had lost the fight, Thranduil gave in. He would accompany them tonight and, just to please Legolas, he would be on his best behavior, but he would definitely try to draw as little attention as possible.

Thranduil remained at Haldir's side most of the time, occasionally holding Remmen, who was a sweet baby and stayed quiet during the wedding ceremony. Aragorn had called upon Legolas as his witness, which left Thranduil and Haldir watching Legolas bear witness to the wedding.

During the ceremony, Thranduil caught Elrond's gaze, which was directed at him with a knowing expression in his gray eyes – though what Elrond pretended to know remained hidden to Thranduil. He continued to hold Remmen close and rocked him occasionally. It seemed that the things which used to soothe Legolas when he had been a baby also worked on Remmen now.

Sudden movement behind Mithrandir, who was now proclaiming Aragorn and Arwen bound for life, made Thranduil curious, and his breath caught in his throat, catching sight of strong features, wild, blond mane, and hazel eyes, which held a strong fire in them. The Man was dressed in the garb of the Rohirrim, so it was safe to assume he was one of the horse lords.

Haldir had heard Thranduil's breath catch, and he cast an amused glance at his father in law. Finding him staring, he followed Thranduil's gaze. Ah, Éomer had caught Thranduil's attention? He frowned then, wondering what would come of this.

"Who is he?" whispered Thranduil into Haldir's ear, careful not to disturb the happy couple, who were now exchanging wedding bands.

"Éomer, King of the Mark. He succeeded Théoden when he died in battle." Haldir suddenly felt reluctant to reveal more. He had hoped someone would draw Thranduil's attention, but Éomer was a mortal Man. What if Thranduil fell in love with him and then realized he would shortly lose his beloved? This was an attraction he shouldn't encourage.

"A King of Men." Much like Aragorn, then. Thranduil's brow furrowed and he pulled Remmen close to his chest. Éomer hadn't seen him yet, and he wanted to keep it that way, hiding himself behind Haldir's back. "There is fire in this one." Instinctively he knew it would burn him and in the process rekindle his own. But this was folly. He shouldn't be thinking in this way. Fortunately for him, the wedding ceremony had come to an end and everyone cheered when Aragorn claimed his first official kiss from his wife.

Legolas congratulated the couple, but didn't linger. His instincts told him to return to his father's side, and when he did, he immediately saw the feverish expression in the emerald eyes, which were fixed on someone at Aragorn's side. /Éomer? Why is my father staring at Éomer?/

His thoughts returned to the first time Éomer and he had met. It hadn't taken him long to aim an arrow at the proud horse lord. /Oh, I am a fool! Of course is Ada drawn to him! I felt some attraction as well./ But the attraction had been weak and his love for Haldir strong. /But Ada isn't bound and he will feel it stronger./ Legolas understood perfectly; Éomer's fire and passion was just what his father needed. /But Éomer is mortal. Nothing good can come out of this./ Exchanging a look with Haldir, he realized his husband had reached the same conclusion. As much as it pained them, they had to smother this attraction, for both of them knew Thranduil wouldn't survive losing another lover.

There was another one who had seen the spark flare in Thranduil's emerald eyes, and Celeborn felt troubled as well. /Elbereth, don't let him fall in love with a mortal. He won't survive losing him./

But was the Queen of the Valar listening?

"Where do you think you are going?" Legolas leaned against the wall of the corridor, watching his father's retreating back. "The feast is only beginning." He had entrusted Remmen to Haldir's care upon seeing Thranduil sneak off, and he had quickly taken up pursuit.

Thranduil nervously moistened his lips, and then turned to face his son. "You know I don't do well with crowds."

"So you are going to lock yourself up in your rooms instead? Ada, that is not acceptable." Legolas quickly covered the distance between them, placed his hands on Thranduil's shoulders and looked at his mirror image – save for their eyes, they could have passed for twins. "Please don't do this."

Thranduil's gaze softened. "My dearest son, you don't know what it is that you are asking."

"I think I know… Someone caught your eye, didn't he?" Legolas wasn't sure bringing up Éomer was the right thing to do, but he needed to install some hope in his father. He had to prevent Thranduil from locking himself away.

Thranduil blushed weakly. "I was too obvious."

"You cannot hide such things from me," chided Legolas teasingly. "Éomer is a courageous warrior, a good choice, but –"

"He is mortal," finished Thranduil for him. "I know that. It is the very reason why I left the feast." He lifted pleading eyes to meet his son's. "Let me go."

"No." Legolas firmly shook his head. "I don't know what madness has come over me, for I agree with you that falling for a mortal will bring you pain, but at the same time I cannot allow you to hide." He wrapped an arm around his father's waist and gently steered him back toward the main hall. Maybe it was time to take some risks.

Celeborn and Elrond noticed Thranduil's reluctant return. "Is Legolas really dragging his father into the hall?" asked Elrond, slightly bewildered. He had never thought it possible that Thranduil would let anyone dictate his actions.

"It certainly looks that way," said Celeborn, his eyes narrowing in study. "Thranduil looks like he doesn't want to be here."

"He surprises me," admitted Elrond, who smiled at Arwen when Aragorn guided her onto the dance floor to dance the first dance with her. "It makes me wonder if I ever really knew him."

Celeborn nodded once. "I knew him very well when we still lived in Doriath. He was a charming youngster, a bit introverted, but very pleasant to have around. He was a quick study too."

Elrond gave Celeborn a probing glance. "You were friends?"

"Good friends, but that changed on the slopes of Mount Orodruin. When he lost Oropher, he lost his mind as well. In retrospect, I understand his fierce reaction; Oropher was mother and father to him."

Elrond nodded and a thoughtful expression appeared on his face. "Look at him cuddling Remmen. I always wondered how it was possible that Legolas became such a caring, and warm person. But I am beginning to understand that we only saw one side to Thranduil – the only side he allowed us to see."

"He raised Legolas extremely well," agreed Celeborn, "Remmen is blessed to have such a…" Celeborn frowned, wondering how to properly phrase this, "Mother?"

Elrond chuckled softly. "Haldir and Legolas are very happy."

Celeborn's gaze remained with the Elf-Lord. "But Thranduil isn't happy. He is alone."

Elrond arched an eyebrow. "You do seem awfully interested in his well-being, my good friend."

"I miss our comfortable friendship," explained Celeborn, cocking his head so he could continue to study Thranduil when the Elf moved behind Haldir.

"Then why don't you go and talk to him? Maybe he misses your friendship as well?"

Celeborn nodded; he might do just that.

Éomer's gaze searched the large hall. Ever since he had arrived to witness the wedding ceremony he had felt eyes upon him and now he was trying to locate the source of that attention. Intercepting Elrond's gaze, he nodded politely and then moved on, until his gaze came to rest on Legolas. The news of Legolas giving birth to a son had quickly reached Edoras and he had sent a messenger to convey his congratulations. He had been stunned to hear that the fierce Elven warrior had given birth, but had then accepted the fact. Elves were strange, mystical beings to him, and he simply accepted they were gifted in many ways.

Walking toward Legolas, he smiled brightly at him. Haldir instantly appeared at Legolas' side, and Éomer easily caught the proud and possessive expression in the Elf's hazel eyes. "Greetings, Legolas, Haldir…" He paused momentarily and then added, "And you, little one." The baby's brown eyes stared at him inquisitively and the fingers of his tiny hand unfolded as if reaching for him. "May I?"

Legolas nodded, and smiled as Éomer offered Remmen a finger. His son tightly clutched the digit with his small fingers and then cooed happily. "He likes you."

"What is there to dislike about me?" said Éomer, teasingly, giving Legolas a radiant smile. A soft, warning growl emanated from Haldir's throat, which made Éomer smile even more brilliantly. "Be assured, Haldir. I don't begrudge you your happiness. You are very fortunate to have found such dedicated love."

Haldir's features relaxed. The fact that he felt extremely jealous when someone paid Legolas more than the usual attention surprised him, but it did make sense. He had just become a proud father and was ready to defend his mate and child and secure his territory. "I thank you for your kind words."

But Éomer's attention had already drifted away from the happy couple, and he was now wondering about the shadow hovering behind Haldir's back. "Would you introduce me to your friend?"

Haldir and Legolas exchanged a look and then made their decision. "This is Thranduil," said Haldir, pulling his father in law into Éomer's sight.

Éomer's heart missed a beat and he forgot to breathe momentarily, as he finally got his first look at Thranduil. "But he… Are you twins?" The expression in the emerald eyes worried him for some reason, which he couldn't label. Something seemed off with the other Elf, but at the same time, Thranduil was also a divine vision.

Legolas chuckled softly. "He is my father… and mother."

Thranduil swallowed hard at hearing those words, but millennia of keeping up pretence helped him compose himself. He bore Éomer's questioning look with pride, and returned the Man's gaze.

Éomer's eyes widened. "But he doesn't look a day older than you, Legolas!"

"We Elves age very slowly," said Thranduil in a remarkably calm and emotionless tone. Although his feelings raged, he kept them from coming to the surface. The attraction he felt toward Éomer was growing deeper, more consuming, and for the first time since Remmen's passing he felt passion – lust.

Éomer inclined his head respectfully. "I am delighted to make your acquaintance. Your son and I have fought side by side to defeat the Evil One and Legolas has gained my respect and friendship." Hearing another growl from Haldir, he quickly added, "And so did Haldir."

Amused, Legolas watched Haldir. "Down, husband of mine."

Haldir raised an eyebrow. "Down?"

Legolas leaned in closer and whispered into Haldir's ear, "There is no need for you to feel threatened. Don't you know that I love only you?"

Haldir blushed slightly. "I have never felt this jealous before. It must be because I am a father now." Remmen had released Éomer's finger and was now tugging at Haldir's silver hair. "I will behave from now on."

"Good," said Legolas, who turned to Éomer once more. "My father only arrived last night and these surroundings are alien to him." He didn't know why he was giving Éomer an opening. Part of him warned him that Thranduil wouldn't survive losing Éomer, but another part told him to take a risk.

"I am a stranger here myself," admitted Éomer, "Maybe we can explore the city of Minas Tirith together?"

Haldir gave Legolas an alarmed look. He had been under the impression that they wouldn't encourage them. Then why was Legolas making it so easy for Éomer to move in? And now that he studied the Rohir more closely, he easily detected the Man's interest in Thranduil. The Valar help them! This attraction was mutual!

"We could start with the gardens," offered Éomer, who refused to pass up this opportunity to get to know the beautiful Woodland Elf. When Legolas had aimed that arrow at him, he had felt instantly attracted to him, but once he had realized Legolas was bound to Haldir, he had backed off, not wanting to meddle in a marriage. But Thranduil… /I wonder if he is bound./ He doubted it. Legolas would never allow him to make advances if his father was married. /What if Thranduil is still available?/ Overcome with lust and desire, he took a step closer to Thranduil.

Thranduil saw the new, added fire in the hazel eyes and knew what was happening for he felt it too; there was a sensual, sexual tension between them, which he had never felt before. It had been different with Remmen. They had courted one another for nearly a decade before binding themselves and making love. "The gardens, you say? Yes, I am interested in exploring them."

Mouth agape, Haldir stared at Legolas in alarm, feeling the tension between Thranduil and Éomer as well. He didn't interfere when Éomer reached for Thranduil's hand and cradled it within his own. He felt paralyzed, as if some greater power was stopping him from meddling in this affair.

Legolas was under the same spell as Haldir, and felt unable to stop Éomer when the Man steered Thranduil toward the doorway. Once they had disappeared from his view, he regained control of his body and stared at Haldir in disbelief. "What happened just now?" Even Remmen had grown utterly quiet in his arms.

"I was unable to intervene…" Haldir shook his head, and stared at the doorway. "I can go after them if you like."

"No," said Legolas in a thoughtful tone. "I don't know what happened just now, but I feel this is right."

"But aren't you worried your father will be hurt when…" Haldir didn't want to finish his sentence.

"I share your worries," said Legolas, rocking Remmen gently. "Falling in love with a mortal is ill-fated. Éomer's life span is but a moment compared to an Elf's. I am afraid what Éomer's death will do to my father."

"But we cannot stop him either. Something won't let us intervene." Haldir's expression grew saddened. "He won't survive losing another lover."

"Lover?"

Hearing Celeborn's calm voice this unexpectedly made Legolas and Haldir turn their heads to meet the elder Elf's gaze. Something unreadable lay in Celeborn's eyes.

"Are you sure that this is about love?" Celeborn's eyes narrowed in thought. He had watched Thranduil and Éomer as well, but he had reached a different conclusion.

"What else can it be?" Puzzled, Legolas stared at the elder Elf. The fact that Celeborn was taking part in this conversation surprised him.

"Lust…"

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 7

Lust. He hadn't felt lust for millennia and now it burned him with a passion that scared him. Éomer had gained a tight hold on his hand and was leading him into the gardens – toward a small, artificial lake. By the Valar, what was he doing? Why was he giving into this sweet madness? Acting this impulsively wasn't like him! When Éomer rubbed his hand, the skin immediately felt on fire, and Thranduil quivered with anticipation.

Éomer felt the same way. Never before had he felt such an all-consuming need to have someone – hold and claim him – and he would face anyone, fight and defeat any enemy that would try to keep him from Thranduil. Some sort of enchantment was at work, which neither of them could explain.

They had finally reached the lake side and Éomer pulled Thranduil close against his chest. Staring at the wide-eyed, golden-haired beauty in his arms, he slowly went down onto his knees in reverence. Bowing his head, he smiled when Thranduil placed his hand on top of his wild mane to caress it. "I don't know what is happening," he admitted, shakily.

Thranduil briefly looked down at the Man in front of him, and then knelt as well, cradling the other's head with his hands. "I don't know either what spell has taken hold of us." Éomer's hazel eyes met his and a surge of sexual energy made them both sway. "I have never been with a Man before, Éomer, and it has been a while since I lay with a male."

Éomer cocked his head and adoringly stared at his Elf. The palm of Thranduil's hand now pressed against his cheek and he rubbed his face against the soft flesh. "I have lain with my shield brothers after we fought, but I never thought I would ever draw the attention of such a divine being as you. You are a dream come true." Boldly, he raised a hand and ran his fingers through Thranduil's mane, only now realizing it lacked Legolas' brilliance and silken feel. "I would claim you, if you desire it as well."

Thranduil's eyes took on an unreadable expression. "This is about lust, you do know that?" A lust that was rekindling his fire – his feelings.

Éomer nodded his head once. "I know that, fair one. But I would still have you."

"So be it," said Thranduil, leaning in closer and touching his lips to Éomer's for the very first time. Energy surged through them at the contact and Éomer reacted at once by pushing him down until he was sprawled on his back on the grass.

Kneeling on all fours, Éomer loomed over Thranduil. He had placed his hands at either side of the Elf's head and straddled Thranduil's waist, feeling the hard evidence of his partner's desire. "I have never acted this rashly before. I always choose my lovers carefully."

"We aren't lovers," said Thranduil wistfully. "We are slaves of our lust."

Éomer nodded in understanding and then repeated Thranduil's words. "So be it." Diving down toward Thranduil's lips, he claimed them in a bruising kiss. Thranduil arched his back, and Éomer quickly slipped an arm beneath him. "You taste so sweet – of raspberries and cinnamon."

Thranduil smiled lazily. "You reek of horse and weapons."

Éomer burst out laughing. "Oh, I do!" Enchanted, he stared into Thranduil's emerald eyes. His agile fingers cunningly dealt with the row of buttons that kept him from claiming his prize. Pushing the robes aside, he was rewarded with pink flesh, and his fingers quickly teased the nipples into hardness by rolling them between his fingertips. Soft mews escaped Thranduil's lips and again madness seized him. Kissing the Woodland Elf deeply, he used his other hand to undo the lacing of Thranduil's leggings.

Thranduil in turn managed to remove Éomer's shirt and slid one hand into the other's breeches. The Man moaned deep in his throat and a moment later, Thranduil slid down the breeches, revealing the other's erection. His eyes widened briefly, and then he licked his lips in appreciation. "You may claim me, my champion," he said wickedly.

Éomer had grown rather breathless, as Thranduil stroked him to complete hardness. Hovering above Thranduil, he panted heavily, seeing the emerald pupils dilate with lust. "Guide me." His excitement was getting the better of him and he thrust blindly against the other's lower body.

The lazy smile remained on Thranduil's face when he reached for Éomer's manhood. He spread the pre-ejaculate over the head, raised his hips and guided the Rohir closer to his target. Positioning Éomer's hard flesh against his entrance he took a deep breath and then nodded once, giving his partner the permission he was obviously waiting for.

Growling possessively, Éomer slowly inched inside, knowing very well that he had to be careful due to the lack of oil that would normally ease his way in. "You… are… exquisite…" In order to soothe Thranduil, who was emitting soft mews of distress, he whispered compliments into the other's ear and stroked the long, golden hair. "Almost there…"

He had forgotten what being taken felt like and Thranduil whimpered softly. Éomer paused, for which he was grateful, and he managed to steady his breathing. Once he was ready for more, he nodded again. Éomer slid the last inch in and was now completely buried inside him.

They remained frozen in time so they could savor the sensation of being connected in such an intimate manner. Thranduil was tight, and Éomer was afraid he might come the moment he moved, so he looked at Thranduil's knitted brow instead. Realizing that the golden-haired beauty was in a considerable amount of discomfort, he leaned in closer and engaged the Elf's already bruised lips in a passionate kiss. Simultaneously he slipped one hand beneath Thranduil's left knee and supported his partner's leg before thrusting that first time, and aiming for that pleasurable spot in the tight channel.

Emerald eyes – which had been closed in order not to reveal any discomfort – opened, and stared at Éomer in delight. Waves of pleasure, need and lust washed over him, and he tried to raise his hips in answer.

"Let me do the work. Enjoy this, my fair one." Éomer was determined to give Thranduil as much pleasure as possible and had instinctively realized his partner was weakened for some obscure reason. The need to pamper and strengthen him overruled any desire Éomer had to quickly find release and he promised himself not to leave his partner behind.

He slightly changed his position until he was able to support Thranduil's other leg as well. He was deeply touched, seeing the trust and vulnerability on Thranduil's face. For some reason the golden-haired Elf had completely entrusted himself to him, and Éomer vowed to never betray that trust. He set a slow, but pounding rhythm, and kept Thranduil in position whilst he thrust deeper into the welcoming body.

Thranduil stared into Éomer's hazel eyes, and was bewitched in turn, reading trust and desire there. He couldn't explain what was happening, their need to physically become one baffled him as well, and he was too tired to question their actions. This felt right, and his hungry soul soaked up Éomer's body heat, and the Man's desire to pleasure him.

He buried the fingers of his left hand in Éomer's blond mane whilst his other came to rest on the Man's buttocks, urging him to move faster and deeper. Éomer instantly obliged him, quickening their pace. He bit his bottom lip, and entranced, Thranduil watched the mortal move above him. There was strength in Éomer, strength, valor and determination. His climax took him by surprise and Thranduil yelped Éomer's name when he found release.

Éomer continued to thrust, but in the end he succumbed to the contracting sensation that massaged his length. Coming hard, he buried himself with one last thrust and then collapsed on top of Thranduil, whose arms welcomed him – holding him close.

Emerald and hazel eyes met in wonder. Éomer quivered over his entire body, as an orgasmic sensation swept over him. He couldn't recall ever feeling so sated before – but at the same time he felt weak, drained even. Awed, he watched as Thranduil's hair regained its golden luster and a bright light seemed to shine from deep within his body. Eager to take his weight off of his partner, he reversed their positions and rolled Thranduil atop of him. His softened member slipped out of Thranduil's body and he moaned keenly at the sharp loss.

Big, emerald eyes stared at Éomer's hazel ones. Those ethereal eyes had gained another sensual dimension, which made Éomer wish he could grow erect and take Thranduil again. "I thank you for this gift."

"No, it is I who should thank you," replied Thranduil sweetly. "You rekindled the fire in my soul. Your fire burned me."

Éomer wrapped his arms around Thranduil and gazed questioningly into the green eyes. "You are pleased then? I was afraid I was going too fast and taking things too far."

"I am indeed pleased," purred Thranduil softly. "You did well."

A smug smile surfaced on Éomer's face. "And I am more than willing to do it again."

Thranduil purred, low in his throat. "And I am more than willing to be taken again."

A lone figure stood hidden behind ancient trees. Celeborn had followed them here and had lost himself watching their intimate play. He had ruthlessly ignored the throbbing of his own hard member and had focused on Thranduil instead. The Elf-Lord had realized why this was happening and had come here in order to protect Thranduil, should Éomer prove an inattentive and brutal bed partner. Thankfully his fears hadn't come true. The two males rested in each other's arms and he could clearly hear Thranduil purr his pleasure.

The sound brought a smile to his face. Éomer was just what Thranduil needed; the Man's fire had burned him, leaving him glowing soft silver in the dark of night. Éomer and Thranduil probably didn't fully realize it, but the Man had just given the Woodland Elf new energy. Energy, which Thranduil had lacked since losing Remmen. /I cannot give Thranduil what he needs. My love is calm, unlike Éomer's lust, which is a torrential river. I will let Éomer have his way with you now, because you need him to grow strong again. But once you have fully recovered from your grief, you will be ready to move on, and then I will be there to stake my claim./

He had fought down his rising jealousy ever since seeing Éomer taking Thranduil. It had been in exactly that moment when Éomer had sheathed himself that he had realized his hidden feelings for the Woodland Elf.

/Celeborn, that realization comes just in time./

Galadriel's wise and gentle voice caressed his mind and Celeborn raised an eyebrow. He hadn't been aware of her presence.

/You are right, husband-mine. Thranduil needs Éomer right now, but in time he will seek a new mate – someone to share his love and life with, and that won't be Éomer. Their lust shines brightly, but will die quickly./

Celeborn's frown deepened; he hadn't realized Galadriel knew of his interest in Thranduil.

/You gave yourself away earlier when we talked./ An echo of a soft giggle traveled down their connection. /I released you from your marital vows. I could release you from our bond too./

/Galadriel, dear wife, you approve?/

/Would I set you free otherwise? Don't give up hope, Celeborn. He will come to you eventually. Your love will shine brightly when he is ready to look into your heart./

Celeborn left Thranduil and Éomer at the lake side and returned to the feast before his loved ones could miss him.

Éomer enjoyed the sensation of feeling Thranduil's fingers combing through his wet hair. He had braved the cold water for the Woodland Elf, who had been determined to wash up before returning to the festivities. He had mostly agreed to this cold undertaking because it enabled him to stay close to Thranduil a little longer.

They had just left the water and now sat in the grass, giving their skin a chance to dry before slipping back into their clothes. Thranduil was seated behind him, and he allowed the elder Elf to braid his hair. "Won't they notice my hair is braided now?"

"Does it matter if they notice?" Thranduil had seldom felt this free of heart before. It was like an enormous burden had been lifted from his shoulders. He couldn't exactly explain what had happened when Éomer had taken him, but his life had definitely changed. He felt stronger now – liberated. "I hope you don't feel like I used you," he whispered eventually.

Looking at Thranduil from over his shoulder, Éomer smiled reassuringly. "I gave you what you needed and you returned the favor. It was a fair trade."

"One that completely took me by surprise," admitted Thranduil, who had finished putting in warrior's braids. Shifting his position, he was now able to study Éomer's face at length. "I don't know if this night will ever come again." Once the feelings of ecstasy had lessened, he had realized they had no future whatsoever. "Oh, why do you have to be mortal?"

Éomer grinned. "I thought you would be more displeased with the fact that I am a Man and not an Elf."

Gracing Éomer with a warm smile, Thranduil shook his head. "It is your soul that I see when I look upon you. I wish you were immortal though, for then we would have stood a chance." He guarded his heart carefully now, unwilling to lose it to Éomer. "You would be the death of me if I allowed myself to love you."

"And my hand is already promised in marriage. I will wed in two months." Éomer gave Thranduil a thoughtful look. "I never expected to lay with someone during my stay here in Minas Tirith." He was a loyal and faithful Man and loved his bride to be, but Thranduil… Thranduil had bewitched him. "Do you think we will ever see each other again?"

"How long will you stay in Minas Tirith?"

"For two more nights," whispered Éomer, seductively running a fingertip along Thranduil's bottom lip. "Will you meet me here again tomorrow night?"

Thranduil gave him a long and hard look. "Three nights of passion then?"

"Yes, three nights of lust."

"I will be here," promised Thranduil, once more under the spell of this magic that was drawing them close.

"And so will I."

"Ada! Where have you been?" Legolas immediately marched up to Thranduil, but then stopped in his tracks, blinked his eyes and then stared hard at his father. The change was remarkable. Gone was the pale skin, dull hair and haunted expression. Little lights shone from the depths of Thranduil's green eyes, and the bruised lips formed a perfect smile. All the signs were there and pointed him into one particular direction, but he couldn't believe the conclusion he had reached. "What happened?" No, it wasn't possible! His father wasn't one who would lay with whoever struck his fancy - in this case Éomer! But the ruby lips were swollen and bruised due to passionate kissing!

Thranduil gave his son a guilty look, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with admitting the truth. "Please don't ask me to explain."

Legolas' eyes widened dramatically. "Ada!" Thranduil could be stubborn at times and he was afraid this time his father would really test his patience. "You were with Éomer, don't deny it!" The emerald eyes darkened when they next fixed on him, and Legolas wondered why his father felt this defensive. "I am not blaming you or thinking badly of you! I am merely concerned he took advantage of you now that you are vulnerable!"

Thranduil lowered his eyes and sighed. "Legolas, please don't make me talk about this." He didn't want his son to think badly of him for letting Éomer have his way with him; he just wasn't certain how Legolas would react to hearing the truth.

"It was consensual, wasn't it? He didn't force you in any way, did he?" Legolas placed a hand on his father's shoulder and used the other to lift Thranduil's chin so the elder Elf was forced to look at him.

Thranduil's pride showed in his blazing eyes at hearing Legolas' tone. "I would never allow anyone to take me against my will! I can fight off a pursuer!"

Legolas involuntarily sucked in his breath; his father's proud and strong tone taking him aback. Focusing on the expression in his father's eyes, he took a step back from Thranduil. "What has happened to you?" The fierce pride, strength and soft light that shone from deep within his father's fëa puzzled him.

Thranduil's expression softened. "Legolas, there are some things that are private."

"You never kept anything from me before!"

"I am not certain you will continue to look favorably upon me once you know the truth. Let this rest, my son."

Legolas nodded, shakily, realizing Thranduil wasn't going to tell him. "You cannot possibly love Éomer! You just met him!"

Thranduil shook his head and gently caressed Legolas' face, running his fingertips along his son's jaw. "This is a temporary love at best, my son."

"Temporary, because Éomer is mortal," realized Legolas, "Oh, Ada, I regret—" But Thranduil stopped him from speaking the words by placing a finger across his lips.

"I regret nothing and neither should you. This is between Éomer and I." Thranduil wondered how to make Legolas understand when he didn't understand what had happened himself. "I cannot explain the sweet madness that took hold of us. It is in our blood and we acted upon it."

Legolas cocked his head in question. "It isn't my place to lecture you in this matter, but… Please guard your heart carefully. I don't want to lose you to grief after all." This conversation had a surreal feel to it. Only hours ago his father had been listless and disinterested in the people surrounding him. Now Thranduil literally radiated warmth and light. His father's inner light had been rekindled and if this was Éomer's doing, he was indebted to the Rohir. "Don't lose your heart, Ada. His life span doesn't compare to yours. You will be left heartbroken when he dies."

"I know that only too well," said Thranduil, soothingly caressing Legolas' hair. "Why don't you concentrate on Remmen and Haldir and stop worrying about me?"

"How can I possibly not worry about you?" said Legolas, disbelief obvious in his voice.

Thranduil smiled and then buried Legolas in a hug. "I love you, my son, but you have to stop worrying about me."

Legolas slightly pulled back to study his father's eyes. "Something has changed."

"Yes, *I* have changed… am changing. Be assured, Legolas, that I am doing better."

"You do look better," said Legolas, musing absentmindedly. Thranduil was right of course; his father was old and wise enough to make his own decisions. But at the same time Legolas recalled the way his father had hurt when Remmen had died. Seeing Thranduil suffer that dramatically had instilled a great sense of protectiveness in him and it was hard to let go now. He still wanted to make sure his father was all right.

Thranduil just gave Legolas a look full of understanding. Legolas should be given time to adjust to this new development. "Come with me. We should join the others in this marvelous feast." And maybe, he would catch another glimpse of Éomer.

Mithrandir's gaze was locked on Thranduil, seeing the Woodland King had made his return. Noticing his old friend's transformation, his gaze shifted away from Thranduil, scanning the hall until he happened upon Éomer's drained expression. /Interesting – most interesting./

"You are brooding, Olorín," whispered Rúmil into his lover's ear. "What is amiss?"

"I am not certain anything is amiss," said the Istar in a thoughtful tone. "Maybe everything is right for the first time in millennia – for Thranduil that is." He caught another surprised look, which was aimed at Rúmil and him. The people of Gondor had looked questioningly at them when they had realized the nature of their relationship, but he continued to disregard their looks, knowing only too well what an odd couple they must seem.

"I will ride you tonight," whispered Rúmil seductively, "I want to see your sky-blue eyes erupt with passion when you find release."

Mithrandir nearly choked on his wine and then quickly glanced at his lover. "You are turning most wicked, my love."

"Yes, and that is just the way you like me."

"They looked happy," said Erestor, who leaned into the comfort of Glorfindel's embrace. They had witnessed the couple retire to their rooms and after some encouraging cheering – mostly coming from Éomer, Glorfindel and the twins – everyone had left the corridor, giving the newly weds their privacy.

"It is good to see Arwen happy, considering the sacrifice she made," agreed Glorfindel. He had drunk a little too much wine and was now pondering the situation of newly weds and his wicked brain was coming up with a lovely suggestion. They had reached the door to their rooms and the moment Erestor pushed down the door handle, Glorfindel swept him off his feet and tightly cradled him against his chest.

"What are you doing!?" Erestor yelped, grabbed Glorfindel by the neck for support and held on tightly when the blond carried him into the room. Next, he was deposited in the centre of the bed, and looking up at Glorfindel he found that his lover was quickly removing his formal robes. "What *are* you doing?"

"I am going to make you scream tonight," Glorfindel said cockily. He had managed to step out of his robes, and briefly swayed as the wine went to his head. "Scream with pleasure," he announced proudly.

Erestor held his breath when Glorfindel swayed dangerously and then fell face-forward onto the bed. Soft snoring erupted from beneath the Balrog Slayer, signaling he had fallen into a deep sleep. Erestor arched an eyebrow, wondering if he should be amused or offended. "You really outdid yourself today." Rolling Glorfindel further onto the bed until the blond was resting comfortably, he gave his lover an amused look.

Quietly - so not to disturb his lover's sleep - he undressed as well and then lay down beside Glorfindel, who in his sleep instantly snuggled up to him. Erestor wrapped his arms around the blond and curled himself protectively around him. "You owe me one night of unbridled passion, Glorfindel."

"No…ted…"

Erestor chuckled softly. "You are very lucky that I love you, Glorfindel." Glorfindel nodded against his shoulder and then slid deeper into sleep. Realizing that cuddling felt nice too, Erestor drifted into sleep as well.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 8

Thranduil was unable to go to sleep for the reminder of the night. Instead, he took to the balcony, and wrapped himself up in a warm blanket – not because he was cold, but because he loved the feeling of being wrapped in something warm. His thoughts were with Éomer, and he was reminiscing on what had happened at the lake only a few hours ago.

It seemed like a dream to him, but his body was alive with energy, and thus the very proof that Éomer and he had indeed made love. "I wonder what happened." He was at a loss to explain their behavior.

"Remmen, what do you think of me now?" Several times he had come close to entering the Halls of Waiting, but never had he reached Remmen's fëa. Maybe his beloved had been allowed to return to Arda, maybe he still dwelt in the Halls. He just didn't know. "I regret that I couldn't stay faithful, but something took possession of Éomer and I. We were unable to stop it."

"Maybe you weren't supposed to stop it?"

Thranduil's eyes widened in alarm, recognizing Celeborn's voice. For one moment he thought the other Elf had sneaked into his rooms, but he then realized that Celeborn's rooms were next to his, and the Lord of the Golden Wood had also taken to the balcony, thus hearing his words. Thranduil berated himself for being so careless as to speak aloud without first making sure that he was alone. "Those words weren't meant for your ears, Celeborn." He tried to sound cross with the silver-haired Elf, but in reality he was angry with himself.

Celeborn inclined his head in understanding. "But I heard them nonetheless, and it makes me wonder why you think that this is a bad thing. Wouldn't Remmen rejoice for you now that you have found someone to light your inner flame? Haven't you been living with the dead for far too long, my old friend?"

Thranduil rose from the floor, still tightly clutching his blanket and walked toward Celeborn. They were only a few feet away from one another, separated by the balcony. "Why would you say that? Don't you know that Remmen is my life?"

"*Was* your life," corrected Celeborn in a caring tone. "He was your life. He wouldn't want you to mourn his passing for the rest of your life. He died defending Legolas; it was an honorable death. Let him go and allow yourself some peace of mind."

Thranduil had tensed whilst listening to Celeborn's words, but his tight muscles loosened when the other Elf's loving tone registered with him. Celeborn wasn't being unnecessarily cruel to him; the elder Elf was trying to help. "You would have liked Remmen."

"I am sure I would have, had I been allowed entry to your lands." Celeborn gave his old friend a forgiving smile.

Thranduil swallowed hard, recalling he had threatened to inflict serious injury if Elrond or Celeborn ever set foot on his lands. "I was mad with sorrow after my father died."

"I know that." Celeborn wished the balcony didn't separate them, because he felt an overwhelming urge to fold his arms around Thranduil. "I should have tried harder to restore communication when Remmen died. When you didn't answer my letter, I assumed you didn't want my support. That was until Legolas told me that grief consumed you at the time and that you were unable to answer any letters. I took the easy way out."

Thranduil's eyes began to mist over with tears. "I have missed you, Celeborn. I considered you my best friend at one time."

"Maybe it isn't too late to rebuild that friendship? I am willing to try if you are." Celeborn extended his hand, offering Thranduil his friendship. "It is yours if you want it."

Thranduil carefully considered Celeborn's words and eventually accepted the peace offering, placing his hand in the elder Elf's. "I want it." Celeborn's radiant smile took him aback, and he offered a weak one of his own.

"Why don't you tell me about Remmen? Maybe it will soothe your mind to remember your beloved." Celeborn was considering climbing over to Thranduil's balcony so they were no longer separated.

"And you will listen whilst I speak of the past?"

"Yes. And hopefully you will speak of the present as well. Remmen belongs in your past, Éomer in the present, and only the Valar know what your future will bring."

Thranduil nodded slowly, realizing Celeborn was still holding his hand in his. "Would you join me in my rooms then? I have no desire to continue to talk here whilst the whole of Minas Tirith can hear us."

Celeborn regretted releasing Thranduil's hand, but he had to do so in order to join him later. He left his rooms, walked into the corridor and found the door to the Woodland Elf's quarters already open. Stepping inside, he closed the door behind him and advanced on the lone figure, which now stood in front of the fire place. The flames created a red silhouette around the golden-haired Elf and Celeborn sucked in his breath, overcome by feelings of affection for his old friend.

"Sit," said Thranduil, inviting Celeborn to make himself comfortable in one of the chairs near the fire place. Sitting down himself, he studied the elder Elf. They had been best friends once, and he now hoped they could rebuild part of their friendship. He needed friends right now.

Celeborn carefully lifted Thranduil in his arms and carried the sleeping Elf to the bed, where he gently deposited him in the center. The golden-haired Elf had fallen asleep after talking about Remmen for hours. Celeborn briefly sat down and brushed a strand of golden hair away from Thranduil's face. Smiling at the younger Elf, he leaned in closer and pressed a kiss on Thranduil's brow. "I will wait for you," he vowed calmly.

After rising from the bed, he headed for the doorway. He stepped into the corridor and closed the door behind him, leaving Thranduil to his dreams.

"Remmen is just as sweet as you were," said Thranduil, pleased. The Elfling lay cradled against his chest and was obediently emptying his milk bottle.

Legolas and Haldir exchanged a smile. "Ada, why didn't you have more children?" asked Legolas curiously. He had never thought about that before, but seeing Thranduil fuss over Remmen made him wonder. The fact that Thranduil grew pallid, worried him and he frowned. "Did I say something wrong?"

Thranduil moistened his lips, suddenly feeling nervous. "We never told you – Remmen and I."

"Told me what?" His curiosity was piqued and Legolas stared deeply into his father's eyes.

"I am not certain I should tell you this," said Thranduil, stalling whilst he helped little Remmen burp. The Elfling giggled happily and his tiny arms managed to grab hold of one of Thranduil's braids. "Ah, now you aren't so sweet," whimpered Thranduil as Remmen tugged – hard! "What is it with Remmen and hair?" He had seen the baby do this before.

"I don't know… But I can take him if you don't want to hold him any longer," offered Legolas, who now sat down beside his father on the bed. Haldir remained near the fire. Munching on some fruit, he closely watched father and son.

"Nah, I want to hold him," said Thranduil, who had managed to free his hair from Remmen's surprisingly strong hold.

"Ada, you were going to tell me why I am an only child. Don't try to distract me." Legolas was determined to find out the truth; it was obvious that his father was hiding *something*.

Thranduil released a deep sigh. "Are you certain you want to know?" He cast a hesitant look at his son, who firmly nodded his head. "I will tell you, then," he said, giving in. "You are an only child because I died giving birth to you." Unable to look Legolas in the eyes, he looked at the baby instead, immediately noticing that Remmen's eyes were filling with sleep.

"You what? You died?" Legolas stared at his father in shock. "You never told me!"

"Remmen and I decided against telling you. We were afraid it would stop you from having children yourself." Thranduil gently stroked Remmen's tiny fingers, which instinctively curled around his thumb.

"What happened, Ada?" Legolas nervously bit his bottom lip, wishing Thranduil would finally make eye-contact, and when his father did, Legolas took hold of the elder Elf's hand and squeezed gently.

"I continued to bleed after the birth," whispered Thranduil, "The healers failed to stop it and Remmen panicked. I faced death when all I wanted was to hold you and love you."

"But you survived!" Legolas needed more answers and he needed them now!

"I was extremely fortunate that Mithrandir was visiting. To this day I don't know what he did, but he managed to stop the bleeding. I had lost consciousness at that point and had resigned myself to death when a bright light exploded inside my head, the next moment I was awake and in pain. I was weak... but alive."

Legolas swallowed hard. "I never knew…"

"We didn't want you to know," whispered Thranduil.

Haldir had left his chair and had now taken his place at Legolas' side, wrapping an arm protectively around his husband. He wondered if Legolas had been inclined to have Remmen, had the Woodland Elf known the truth.

Now that Legolas remained quiet, Thranduil continued, "I knew what risks were involved with becoming pregnant, but… At the time I wanted us to have a child. And I never regretted that decision. When Remmen died, I only needed to look into your eyes to be reminded of him."

"That's why I asked Haldir to give me a child after we fought at Helm's Deep. I wanted a part of him to stay alive, even if he died in battle." Legolas' gaze shifted from his father to his husband. "I almost lost you, Haldir."

"But I survived. I have you to live for." Haldir leaned in closer and placed a chaste kiss on Legolas' cheek. "Like Thranduil, I am strong. I don't die that easily."

That remark brought a weak smile to Thranduil's features. "Do you blame me for not telling you? I honestly think it was the right thing to do."

"You made the right decision," said Legolas eventually, taking hold of his son and cradling him in his arms. "I might not have had Remmen otherwise." Hearing Thranduil's relieved sigh, he smiled warmly. "I should thank Mithrandir for his support. I must admit I always wondered why Mithrandir visited so often, and why he was your best friend for so many millennia. Now I know."

"He was the only one I allowed close when Remmen died." A sorrowful tone had slipped into Thranduil's voice. "I was so glad to still have you when Remmen passed into the Halls of Waiting."

Haldir was forced to release Legolas from his hold when his husband moved closer to Thranduil to fold his arms around him. Remmen was safe within their embrace and Haldir briefly felt redundant, uncertain what to do. He wanted to comfort them as well, but this was clearly a father and son moment. In the end, he settled for rubbing the small of Legolas' back and being a silent support.

Éomer hurried to the lake and once he had arrived, he removed his clothes. Braving the cold water, he slowly waded inside. He had practiced sword play and archery during the day and was now intent on washing away the fine layer of sweat that had formed on his body.

He had replayed last night's events over and over again in his mind, and he was still at a loss to explain the sudden attraction. It almost felt like they were being moved across a board like chess pieces and someone else was directing their actions.

Thranduil was fair – beautiful even – and even without this pull he would have been interested in him. He had been interested in Legolas when he had first met him, hadn't he? But being unable to control his actions wasn't like him. And Éomer felt out of control – utterly out of control.

"You are brooding… Why?"

Éomer spun around, ready to defend himself, and was shocked to find that Thranduil had soundlessly sneaked up on him. The Elf was naked, and his golden hair danced on the water surface. The no longer dull eyes sparkled with green fire and a lazy sensuality radiated from deep within the ethereal being. "I didn't hear you approach."

"You were lost in thought." Thranduil folded one arm around Éomer's waist and turned him in the half-embrace until they were face to face. "What troubles you so?"

Éomer cocked his head – entranced by the eternal beauty so close to him. "I don't wish to speak of my troubled thoughts. Instead I wish to make love to you." Last night Thranduil had been most eager to be taken and he wondered what the Elf's desire was tonight. "Or would you rather have me? I wouldn't deny you."

"Your offer is very tempting," said Thranduil in a thoughtful voice, "but I prefer for you to take me again – or you could let me take myself riding you."

"I like that idea very much," purred Éomer in satisfaction. He completed the embrace by sliding his hands downward to cup the Elf's buttocks in his hands, lifting his temporary lover. Carrying him out of the water, he made sure he maintained a tight hold on Thranduil. Silver water droplets hugged the rosy skin, and Éomer growled hungrily. First he placed Thranduil on the grass, and then he sat down himself. "I brought oil tonight." He quickly uncovered the glass phial and gave Thranduil a smug grin. "I hope I didn't leave you sore last night. That was never my intent."

"Elves are fast healers. I hardly suffered any discomfort." Thranduil placed both hands on Éomer's chest and pushed him flat on his back. "There are some advantages to being naked right from the start." Licking his bottom lip provocatively, he straddled Éomer's hips. "Impressive," he whispered, complimenting the Man as his member grew erect.

"I am always eager to please." Éomer was more than happy to return the teasing. Lazily sprawled on the grass, he was content to let Thranduil do whatever he wanted. "You really are a dream come true." And that was probably what Thranduil would be after these three nights had passed – nothing but a distant dream.

Thranduil bent forward, letting his hair caress Éomer's naked chest. The Man's nipples immediately rose to hardness and Éomer arched beneath him. "Very eager, indeed."

Éomer raised his hips the moment Thranduil's lips touched the head of his erection. A moist, talented tongue swirled around the slit, and the divine sensation made him moan deliriously.

Thranduil enjoyed being the active one in their play. It was in his nature to tease and please, but at the same time he also liked to be in control. That way he could give his partner as much pleasure as possible. Sliding one hand beneath Éomer's buttocks, he kneaded the firm mounds of flesh.

The moment Thranduil finally closed his lips over the head of his throbbing member Éomer threw back his head and moaned needily. His breathing became too quick, and he pushed himself up on one elbow so he could see Thranduil's bobbing head, as the golden-haired Elf relaxed his throat, taking his entire length. "Oh!" Éomer's hand found its way into Thranduil's silken hair and applied a minimum of pressure to tell his lover to quicken his pace. But Thranduil shook off his hand and gave him a wicked look.

"Not yet, my beloved mortal. I want you to reach your climax when inside me." Using some of the oil Éomer had brought, Thranduil coated the enflamed flesh. "Let me ride you."

Éomer nodded and a feverish expression appeared in his eyes, seeing Thranduil slowly take himself. Lying back, he watched Thranduil take in more of him, and once his lover was firmly seated in his lap, Éomer thrust experimentally. That first thrust made Thranduil cry out in pleasure and it wasn't long before Thranduil was dictating their pace, riding Éomer as if he were a wild, untamed stallion.

Éomer had never seen such a bewitching sight before. Ithil had left the cover of the clouds and now showered them with silver light. Thranduil's hair had taken on a mithril color and his skin shone silver. In the emerald eyes burned a thousand silver lights, and Éomer was unable to look away from this magical creature. Running his hands up and down Thranduil's sides, he eventually curled his fingers around his lover's already weeping member, as he didn't want Thranduil to stay behind.

The manipulation proved too much for Thranduil, who threw back his head, yelping and quivering with passion when he finally found release. Warm cream dripped onto Éomer's flat abdomen and Thranduil mumbled unintelligibly, rocking slowly atop of his lover.

Éomer followed Thranduil into ecstasy, purring softly when he reached completion. His wide eyes fastened on Thranduil, who seemed even more beautiful, bathed in silver light. "Oh, I wish I could love you!" But he was mortal and Thranduil wasn't. Allowing this to grow into love was folly.

Thranduil's expression became rueful in understanding. "I wished you were immortal, Éomer." Éomer's arms enfolded him and he followed willingly when the Man pulled him close. Stretching on top of Éomer, he folded one arm around the Man. Resting his head on Éomer's chest, his fingers idly played with the Man's chest hair. "This is most curious," he commented, twirling some hair around a fingertip.

Éomer arched an eyebrow; he had noticed that Thranduil's body was without hair, save for the golden mane that now teased against his face. "Will you join me again tomorrow night?"

"Yes," said Thranduil, raising his head so he could look into Éomer's hazel eyes. "And if you permit it I would like to claim you in our last night together."

"But of course. I would very much like that." Éomer ran his fingertips along Thranduil's jaw line and carefully claimed the bruised lips. They were soft beyond comprehension and he had never tasted anything that sweet before. /And I will never taste them again./ This wasn't about love – this was about lust.

Thranduil allowed him this one kiss – this gift – and smiled at Éomer in understanding. "We should be grateful for these nights and not want something we can never have." Their destinies weren't entwined and soon they would go different paths. /But we have one more night. One night for me to show you how much I appreciate and value your gift./ For Éomer was strengthening him and bringing him back to life. He could never truly repay the Man for relighting his inner light, but he could try.

Elrond and Lindir had secured a nice, secluded spot in one of the smaller, more private halls in front of the fire place. They had decided against joining the crowd in the great Hall, where servants were still cleaning up the chaos the wedding guests had left behind. Elrond had already talked to the happy couple and was relieved the wedding night had progressed without complications. It was a good thing that he had made sure Aragorn didn't have too much wine. Rúmil had tried to constantly refill the groom's glass.

"This is a good place," muttered Lindir, who was absentmindedly twirling a strand of Elrond's dark hair. "A nice place of peace and happiness." Minas Tirith had been quite different before Aragorn had taken up residence here, and the quality of life had definitely improved here.

"Look," said Lindir softly, pointing at Thranduil who was passing them by, but not seeing them. Lindir stared at the golden-haired Elf in surprise. "He is recovering quickly, don't you agree?"

Elrond's eyes narrowed. "You are correct, beloved, and I wonder how this is possible." Growing curious, he softly called out to the Elven King. "Thranduil? A moment of your time, please?" He wasn't sure Thranduil would oblige. So far there hadn't been any arguments between them about the past, but that could change quickly.

At hearing his name, Thranduil halted in his tracks and looked questioningly at the Peredhel. Why was Elrond keeping him from returning to his rooms? "Is something amiss?" Reluctantly he joined the other two Elves in front of the fire place, only now registering the comfortable, close intimate contact the two were in. So Elrond had taken a new lover? That surprised him; having heard through the millennia how much Elrond and Celebrían were in love. But then again, why should Elrond stay alone for the rest of his immortal life?

"Just a word, please. That is if you can spare me some time." Elrond wondered at Thranduil's mellow mood and decided to take advantage of it. "Would you sit with us?"

Thranduil nodded and took a seat on the bench next to them – but still distanced himself by sitting on the other end. He wondered if he could mention his surprise where Elrond and Lindir were concerned and decided to take the risk. "The two of you look happy."

Elrond felt Lindir press closer and he tightened his hold on the minstrel. "That is because we are. Although I am bound to Celebrían to the end of my life I have spoken my vows, promising Lindir to love him until death. We won't be separated."

"Then you won't sail for Valinor," realized Thranduil instantly. He had heard of the twins and Galadriel's impending departure and finding out that Mithrandir would sail as well had pained him. "You will stay?"

Elrond nodded his head. "Lindir and I will stay."

Thranduil cocked his head and studied Elrond. They had parted in anger at mount Orodruin, but that anger seemed gone now. Maybe it *was* time to make a new start. "I won't sail either. Legolas and Haldir will stay and so will I. I won't be parted from my grandson."

Elrond allowed a smile to break through onto his face. "That is good news."

"It is?" Thranduil questioningly raised an eyebrow. "Somehow I had imagined our 'reunion' differently."

Elrond understood. "Much has happened these last three millennia and the rumors brought into the world by the evil one distorted my ideas where you were concerned. It was a blessing that Legolas came to Imladris. It opened my eyes. For so long I remembered the angry and resentful Thranduil that had left us at mount Orodruin. At one point I stopped wondering if my thoughts reflected the truth." Elrond moistened his lips, wondering if he should continue. "When we learned that you…" Oh, how to phrase this? "When we learned that you are Legolas' 'mother', we were in shock, but it also explained why you were in such an emotional upheaval when Oropher died. The loss must have been immense."

Thranduil rubbed his eyes, trying to stop the tears from spilling. "I appreciate your honesty, Elrond."

The smile on Elrond's face brightened, hearing Thranduil speak his name free of loathing for the first time in over three thousand years. "I hope this truly is a new start for us – the three of us."

Thranduil felt briefly confused. Lindir and he had never had dealings before, so why include… "You are talking about Celeborn," he realized belatedly.

"I was under the impression that you were friends once," said Elrond, treading carefully.

"Yes, we were – very good friends." Thranduil then decided to do away with the past between them and accept the fact that Elrond might become a good friend as well, now that they were both trying to make this work. He needed friends and didn't want to shut Elrond out of his life now that the half-Elf was making an effort to befriend him. "Celeborn and I talked already…"

"You did?" Elrond was truly pleased to hear that and bestowed a gentle kiss on Lindir's long hair. "Do you hear that, love? This truly is a place of peace and happiness."

Lindir purred softly and rubbed his cheek against Elrond's shoulder. "I like it here. Minas Tirith reminds me of Imladris."

Thranduil rose from the bench and excused himself. "I will see you later – at dinner perhaps."

"I am looking forward to talking with you more." Elrond had just seen a glimpse of an Elf he had never known before and he was curious to befriend Thranduil and learn more of this Elf.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 9

"Marital life already becomes you," said Éomer, smiling brightly at Aragorn, whom he had found seated on a window sill, staring into the distance dreamy-eyed.

"I am truly happy," admitted Aragorn in a soft tone. "She is the other half of my soul."

Éomer sat down beside Aragorn and stared at his hands, which rested idly in his lap. "She gave up her immortality to be with you."

"Yes, she did. There was a time when I thought it was best for her to sail for Valinor, but this was her choice to make. I accept what she is giving me, but trust me, accepting her choice was hard." Aragorn smiled ruefully. "Knowing she will linger here after my death pains me." He understood why Elrond had beseeched him to let her go. But Arwen's fate had never been his to decide. "We will be happy in life and who knows where our souls will travel after death."

Éomer was reminded of his own temporary lover, but knew better than to mention this matter to Aragorn. "These Elves are mysterious, ethereal beings. They are beyond my comprehension."

"I have lived with them for most of my life, and yet, their essence still eludes me," agreed Aragorn. "But I have learned to trust their reasoning and instincts."

Éomer briefly rested a hand on Aragorn's shoulder. "I hope your marriage will be blessed with children shortly. I know you both desire them."

Aragorn nodded his head once. "I would love to have children."

"Twins maybe?" hinted Éomer, wickedly. He grinned, seeing Aragorn's gaze darken.

"I would prefer to start with one child," said Aragorn earnestly. "Twins might be too much to handle. I would prefer to be a bit more experienced before having twins."

Éomer rose from the window sill, realizing Arien was beginning her descent. In a few hours he would meet Thranduil at the lake side – for the last time. After taking his leave, he headed for his rooms to bathe and change his clothing. Yes, Elves truly were lovely beings – and Thranduil was the loveliest of all.

"Ada? Are you certain that what you are doing is wise?" Legolas couldn't deny that his father had made a miraculous recovery since he had met Éomer, but that didn't take away his fear that Thranduil would end up mourning losing the Rohir eventually.

"Wise?" Thranduil shrugged his shoulders once. "Who knows what's wise, my son?" He felt like he had no choice. Something or someone had guided him into Éomer's arms and he savored the time they spend together.

"You do know that Éomer will shortly wed Lothíriel? The last thing I want for you is to be hurt." Legolas was grateful that Haldir had volunteered to look after Remmen this evening, for he really needed to talk to his father – undisturbed. And Remmen had the habit of demanding most of his time.

"Yes, my son. I know Éomer's heart belongs to someone else."

"You seem… comfortable with this, which I just don't understand." Legolas shook his head. "I expected you to be devastated when realizing Éomer is promised to someone else."

"This isn't about love, Legolas," said Thranduil, running his fingertips down his son's cheek. "This is about something else. I cannot explain, but… It is almost magical."

Legolas bit his bottom lip, still worried about the effect Éomer's departure tomorrow would have on his father. "He will leave shortly."

"Yes, tomorrow. He told me." Thranduil caressed a strand of his son's hair. "I am honored that you worry about me, pen-neth, but I know what I am doing."

"I hope so."

Thranduil sat on the grass, waiting for Éomer. Tonight, he planned on doing things differently. During his wait, he had discovered a cave near the lake, and he had decided to take Éomer there. Although he wasn't particularly fond of caves, this one he liked, because there was a crevice in the ceiling, allowing him to gaze at the starlit night. Soft raindrops were beginning to fall and the crystal like liquid nestled possessively in his hair.

Éomer came to a halt to savor the lovely sight that Thranduil presented. His heart briefly faltered, but then steadied. He would have given his kingdom and his soul to be immortal and to be able to spend the rest of his life with the golden-haired Elf.

Thranduil had noticed Éomer's arrival, but didn't act yet. He just smiled when the Man sat on his heels beside him, studying him closely. "The expression in your eyes is different tonight, Éomer King."

Éomer grinned at being addressed in that way. "And you become increasingly wicked each time we meet, sire." Things felt different between them tonight. It stemmed from the knowledge that this was their last time together and that realization made this gathering even more special. "I will miss you when I return to my lands."

"I cannot come with you," said Thranduil in a sad tone. "You know that we aren't meant to spend the rest of our lives together."

"My heart is heavy because of that, but I won't fight fate."

Thranduil gracefully rose from the floor, and extended his hand, which Éomer eagerly took into his. "Come with me, my mortal beloved."

Éomer followed Thranduil's lead and was delighted to be guided out of the rain. Once inside the cave, he found that his Elven lover had already built a small fire there. "This is the perfect place to make love."

"I am glad you approve," chuckled Thranduil softly. His fingers were already busy undoing the buttons of Éomer's tunic and he leaned in closer, gently claiming the Man's lips. He wanted to go slow tonight and reward Éomer for the life energy the Man had given him. "Do you know what happened these last two nights?"

"Yes, you drove me out of my mind." Éomer greedily accepted and deepened the kiss, but then realized he liked it when Thranduil dictated their actions and gave control back to the Elven King.

"That's only part of it. Don't you feel drained, Éomer?" Thranduil saw the brilliant shine in Éomer's hazel eyes and just knew the Man had no idea he had given him part of his life energy.

"Drained?" A cheeky grin spread across Éomer's features. "Drained after loving you? Yes." He rested a hand at the small of Thranduil's back, wishing the other would finally undress and touch him. But the golden-haired Elf seemed to want to talk first.

Thranduil gave Éomer a long and probing look. "You really don't know you have been strengthening me these last two nights? Haven't you seen the difference in me? The change you caused?"

Éomer frowned. "I did notice a change in you – a transformation. You are stronger than you were two nights ago. Your hair shines golden again and your eyes sparkle like emeralds. They were quite dead when I happened upon you that first night." His frown deepened. "And you say your recovery is my doing? How is that possible?"

"I don't know," confessed Thranduil in all honestly. "Normally a healing like this demands a close bond, which we don't share. This does vex me. I cannot explain your ability to speed up my recovery."

"Tell me more," bade Éomer, sitting down on the ground whilst taking Thranduil down with him. Instead of trying to seduce the golden-haired Elf, he embraced him and hugged him close. The evening was turning out different from what he had expected.

"I cannot explain this," repeated Thranduil. "But I feel like I have known you for millennia. The way you touch me – body and soul… That touch feels so familiar and it soothes me."

"I feel the same way about you," admitted Éomer in a heavy tone. "It is like I know where, how and when to touch you and kiss you. I feel like I already knew every inch of your body before I ever touched you." His large, hazel eyes searched Thranduil's. "It is like I know your soul."

Thranduil nodded shakily. "What is happening to us? And why?"

Éomer gave Thranduil a warm smile. "I think I know *why* this is happening, but not what." Seeing the golden-haired Elf's wondering look, he continued, "I don't mean any disrespect, but you were weakened when we first met. It seems to me you needed this…" he paused to search for the right word, "this liaison."

"I wonder if this is merely a liaison, but I lack the right words to describe it."

"We cannot solve this riddle, Thranduil," said Éomer in a thoughtful tone. "But we can spend our last hours together in each other's arms." He wasn't certain if Thranduil still wanted to make love to him. The Elf's mood had changed during their conversation and he wanted to give Thranduil a way out.

"Oh, let me love you just once," said Thranduil pleadingly. "Just this once."

This time, Thranduil thought smugly, he was the one to exhaust his lover. Éomer was asleep in his arms, and the Man's skin still shone with warmth and passion. He had taken his mortal beloved slowly, intent on returning the pleasure Éomer had given him these last two nights. To his utter delight, his Rohir had then snuggled up to him, falling asleep. So now he was holding the other close in his arms, warming Éomer with his own body, which had felt cold for so long – but no more.

"I still don't understand how this is possible." There was no bond between them – at least none he was aware of – and it was unheard of that a mortal Man could help heal an Elf. He had thought such a thing impossible!

Yet Éomer had been his salvation. The strength the Man had given him vibrated through his body, making him feel as alive and strong as on the day he had met Remmen for the first time. His body had also tingled with passion and love back then.

"I have no idea how this is possible," he repeated, bestowing a chaste kiss onto Éomer's brow. "But I do know that I owe you my life."

Thranduil was finally able to let go of the ghost that had kept him company for so long. Cuddling up to Éomer in turn, he whispered against the Man's chest, "Remmen, my love, I hope you have found some measure of peace in the Halls of Waiting. Please forgive me my rash attempts to join you there. I know now that Legolas still needs me and I don't want our grandson to grow up without having known me. I want to stay here – on Arda. But I will never forget our love – I promise you."

Éomer's eyes, which had opened during Thranduil's admission, briefly shone with an ethereal light.

"My Lord, I thank you for letting me help my love heal." Remmen bowed deeply before Námo, the keeper of the Halls of Waiting. He had been worried that Éomer's essence would somehow be damaged during the energy transfer, but the Man had never realized a thing and had enjoyed the nightly activities as much as he had.

Námo nodded his head once. Giving Remmen's fëa permission to temporarily meld with Éomer's being hadn't been a hard decision to make. Thranduil had greatly suffered when his mate had been taken away from him, and he had allowed Remmen this chance. It had also set his private plans into motion. Plans, which Remmen knew nothing about. "Life has reclaimed your beloved; rejoice."

Remmen's misty eyes filled with tears of happiness. He had never thought Námo would allow him these three nights to strengthen his lover, but the Vala apparently possessed a romantic streak he had never known about. But this brief reunion with his love had caused him new heartbreak. He still loved Thranduil dearly and would give everything he was to be reunited with him.

"You must leave that life behind you," advised Námo, who had seen the likes of Glorfindel nearly succumb to this longing. "But I will grant that your fëa be reborn, if you desire it."

Remmen's gaze sought out the Vala's. "With my memories intact?" Námo had allowed that only once; when Glorfindel had been returned to Arda.

"Nay," said the Vala, gravely, "You would have no memories of your former life. Allowing that would be cruel on my part."

"Cruel?"

"You would long for something – someone – you can no longer have." Compassion unexpectedly showed in the serious voice. "You deserve a new chance at life – and love." The chill that normally lay in the pale, blue eyes now made way for understanding and sympathy. "You know as well as I do that Thranduil's path takes him away from you. He is meant to be with someone else."

"Celeborn," said Remmen, feeling truly miserable now that his last hope at being reunited with his lost lover had been crushed. "But Celeborn is a good choice," he admitted grudgingly. "The Lord of the Golden Wood will treat him well."

"They are already friends," pointed out Námo, "Their friendship will deepen and blossom into love." He didn't add that it would be a temporary love, for Celeborn's destiny didn't lie with Thranduil either. The two Elves would be companions – lovers – for some time, but not for eternity.

Remmen's heart ached with longing, but then – unexpectedly – Thranduil's words echoed in the Halls of Waiting.

"Remmen, my love, I hope you have found some measure of peace in the Halls of Waiting. Please forgive me my rash attempts to join you there."

Remmen swallowed hard and gave Námo a wistful look. Both of them had despaired each time Thranduil had balanced on the brink of death due to his mourning. It had taken both their cunning and determination to keep Thranduil from entering the Halls.

"I know now that Legolas still needs me and I don't want our grandson to grow up without having known me."

Their grandson… Remmen had been touched to learn that Legolas had called his firstborn after him, and it was then that he had realized that he would always continue to exist in his son's heart – even when he wasn't there in body.

"I want to stay here – on Arda. But I will never forget our love – I promise you."

"I know you will never forget," whispered Remmen in reply – painfully aware of the fact that Thranduil couldn't hear him.

"Thranduil has finally set you free," said Námo compassionately, "You should do the same thing. You will always live on in their hearts and they will never forget you. Allow yourself a new chance at life."

Remmen wasn't completely convinced yet, but nodded his head at any rate. "You have my permission to embed my fëa in a suitable body if there is one available."

Námo nodded once. "It will be done." /When the time and circumstances are right. Things will happen as I wish for them to happen./ Remmen didn't need to know the full extent of his elaborate plans. But the stage was now set and he could maneuver Remmen, Thranduil and Celeborn in the desired positions. Time was something he had in surplus and it didn't matter to him that it would take centuries for his plans to come to fruition. But in the end, the Elf would be his.

With a heavy and burdened heart, Éomer made ready to mount his horse. But then movement to his right caught his attention and he easily identified Thranduil standing in the shadows of the doorway. "One more moment, Aragorn," requested Éomer, "There is someone I need to say my goodbyes to."

Aragorn - who had offered to escort Éomer as far as the border - frowned, wondering who his friend had gotten so close to these last few days. His gaze followed the King of the Mark when Éomer stepped into the corridor and he was able to make out finely spun golden hair and shiny, green eyes. /Thranduil?/ Now there was a surprise!

Éomer had told him of his upcoming marriage to Lothíriel and Aragorn wondered about this newly formed friendship between Éomer and Thranduil. But none of it was really his business and he remained at a distance, choosing not to get involved.

"I thought you wouldn't be here," admitted Éomer in a nervous tone to Thranduil. To his surprise he had woken in his bed in his guest rooms and had reached the only possible conclusion, namely that Thranduil had carried him there after the night spent in the cave. The Elven King hadn't been present when he had woken and he had been afraid he wouldn't be allowed to say his goodbyes. "I missed you when I woke up."

"I couldn't stay," explained Thranduil, "You *do* understand, don't you?"

Éomer nodded, understanding that the time for parting had arrived. Even now they were stalling. "Thank you for these three nights of passion."

"And I want to thank you for bringing me back to life." Thranduil tenderly ran his fingers through Éomer's blond mane. "I want to give you something."

Éomer actually blushed. "You have already given me so much pleasure and joy these last three nights." He shyly looked into Thranduil's eyes, but then his gaze shifted to his right hand, which Thranduil was clasping in his. Unexpectedly, something warm slid down his ring finger. Puzzled, he looked to Thranduil for an explanation.

Thranduil uncovered Éomer's hand and smiled. His fingers lovingly caressed the golden ring, set with sapphire, amethyst and ruby. Remmen had given it to him on the day they had spoken their vows, when they had still thought their love would last forever. For some reason it seemed very appropriate that Éomer should wear it.

Éomer's breath caught; was it just his imagination or did tiny flames burn inside the stones? "It is exquisite, as you are."

"You like it, then?" Thranduil smiled brilliantly, deciding against telling Éomer of the ring's origin. "And I will understand if you cannot wear it in public. There might be questions." Along with this ring, he was releasing the last, tiny part of Remmen's ghost that had been with him for so long.

"I will always wear it," vowed Éomer, "And I will tell everyone the truth should they inquire about its origin. I will tell them that it is a gift from a very close – very dear friend."

Thranduil took a step back, realizing he couldn't postpone their parting much longer. "May the Valar bless you and your line with long life."

Éomer's eyes were alive with emotion, feeling their parting as keenly as Thranduil. "And may you find true love again, my immortal beloved." And there, in the shadows of the doorway, they exchanged their last kiss.

Aragorn rode quietly beside Éomer, sensing his friend's sadness and refrained from asking any questions. He had drawn his own conclusions when he had seen Man and Elf kiss. The ring at Éomer's finger only confirmed his suspicion that feelings of passion existed between the two rulers, but he also knew that Éomer had an obligation to Rohan first. He would marry Lothíriel, sire an heir and rule Rohan until his death.

"Ada?" Legolas saw the expression in his father's eyes and quickly wrapped an arm around him, steering Thranduil toward the blanket, which Haldir had spread over the grass. Remmen was playing with blades of grass and daisies, which regularly escaped his slightly clumsy fingers.

Thranduil followed his son's lead and sat down beside Erestor. The advisor and Glorfindel had joined Legolas and Haldir when they had told them they would picnic in the gardens this afternoon.

"We can leave if you require some privacy, sire," offered Erestor, clearly seeing the distress in Thranduil's eyes. The King seemed stronger, more alive, but at the same time there was sadness and sorrow in the emerald eyes.

"No. Please stay," said Thranduil quickly. "I welcome your company. This is a day of rejoicing and happiness, and I don't want to be alone."

Legolas frowned at the reply, but didn't comment on it. His father would tell him what was amiss when Thranduil felt the time was right to confide in him. In the mean time, he would be a silent support.

Thranduil alternated between looking at Legolas and Haldir. He had told them about his 'liaison' with Éomer because he knew that they would continue to ask questions.

"You spent the last three nights with him and then you let him go?" Legolas felt no small measure of disbelief at hearing his father's words. Remmen cried out softly, demanding his attention and he soothingly rocked his son. "How could you do that? I would have been devastated, had I been forced to let Haldir go after three nights of passion!"

Haldir blushed, flattered, and moved closer to Legolas, wrapping an arm around his husband and their son. "I agree with Legolas," he said thoughtfully. "I would expect you to mourn the loss."

Thranduil shook his head. "I cannot explain what happened between us. It wasn't about love – and not about lust either, as I thought at the beginning. It felt like I had known Éomer all my life and when we parted it felt right." Thranduil briefly lowered his head, and offered Remmen a finger to play with, which the Elfling immediately grabbed and tried to pull into his mouth. Thranduil smiled warmly at the baby. "I don't know why or how, but my heart feels light and free. Losing Remmen burdened me for so many millennia and I was never able to completely set him free. But I managed to do so now – with Éomer's help."

Legolas and Haldir exchanged a look. "Ada, if you cannot explain this to us then how are we supposed to make sense of it?" asked Legolas.

"Maybe we shouldn't even try," suggested Haldir, who was studying Thranduil extensively, still surprised at seeing the change in the elder Elf. There was life, energy and laughter in the emerald eyes; emotions which he had never seen this intensely displayed in those orbs before. The eyes were the mirror of the soul and Thranduil's inner light shone brightly. "Maybe we should simply accept this and be grateful instead."

Legolas maneuvered Remmen into a comfortable position and the Elfling now rested peacefully against his chest, still playing with Thranduil's finger. "I thank the Valar for the gift Éomer has given you, Ada, and if you desire it I will stop questioning you in this matter."

"Thank you, my son," said Thranduil, gratefully, suspecting that this change would bring on many others in his life.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 10

"Elrohir?" Magolion gave his lover an uncertain smile. The matter he wanted to discuss could easily cause a heated argument between them and he highly valued the peace and quiet between them – the easy acceptance and understanding.

Elrohir, seated comfortably in a large chair and reading a book, looked up at hearing the insecure tone of Magolion's voice. "What is it, love?" He placed the book aside, and grew worried, seeing the hesitant expression on the dark-haired Elf's face. "What did you do this time?"

Magolion knelt in front of Elrohir, slipped his arms around his lover's waist and rested his head on the half-Elf's knees. "I love you… You know that, don't you?"

Elrohir's eyes widened, worriedly. "Magolion, what did you do?" Such an unguarded expression of affection on Magolion's part meant trouble.

Magolion lacked the courage to look into Elrohir's eyes when he spoke next. "I don't want to sail for Valinor yet. I am finally befriending Erestor and I want to remain close to him. I need to make amends for my soul's sake."

Elrohir released a relieved sigh. He didn't know what ill tidings he had expected, but certainly not this. "So that is it? You don't wish to sail yet?" Carefully he reached for Magolion, sliding a hand beneath his lover's chin, lifting the face. Magolion was now forced to look at him and Elrohir involuntarily cringed, seeing the tears lurking in the other's eyes. "What do you fear, beloved?"

"I fear a lot of things, but mostly I fear losing you." Magolion shivered. "I know you want to stay close to Elladan and—"

Elrohir silenced him by placing a finger across the trembling lips. He parted his legs, and pulled Magolion in between them so they were as close as possible. "This is unexpected," he admitted thoughtfully. "I cannot give you an answer right now." Could he let Elladan – his twin – sail for Valinor on his own? /Not alone. Orophin will go with him, and once they arrive in the Undying Lands our mother will welcome him./ And then there was the fact that his father and Lindir weren't leaving for Valinor either. Elrond had confided in him the other day, telling him that they would return to Imladris shortly. Elrond, Lindir, Erestor and Glorfindel would live there until after Aragorn's death. Magolion and he could accompany them. That way he would remain close to his father and Magolion to his brother. "Let me think this over, love. I also need to talk to my father and Elladan."

Magolion already felt relieved now that Elrohir was willing to give the matter some thought. At least his lover hadn't told him 'no'. "The ship sails in three days," he said reluctantly. "I will let you sail if you desire it. I will never keep you here, bound by your love for me."

"I know that," said Elrohir quickly. "But I need to discuss this with my family first." A frown appeared on his brow. "Did you already tell Erestor that you want to stay?"

"No, I wanted to talk to you first." Magolion smiled, seeing the warm and understanding expression in Elrohir's eyes. "I don't deserve you, love."

Elrohir returned the smile and buried his fingers in Magolion's long, raven hair. "Yes, you do. You earned me a long time ago." Leaning in closer, he ended their conversation with a kiss.

Celeborn was bored; it was as simple as that. In the Golden Wood he had been needed to guide his people, but here was little for him to do. Aragorn and the servants pampered him, making sure he lived comfortably and he wasn't sure how much more mothering he could take.

He had already assisted Galadriel and Mithrandir in preparing for their journey to the Gray Havens. They would leave in two days and Galadriel and he had already said their private goodbyes. That left him with nothing to do, which only worsened his boredom. He had even tried demanding some of Elrond's time, but the half-Elf had quickly excused himself in order to be with Lindir. In the end, Celeborn slammed the door shut behind him and stepped into the corridor. "I cannot take any more of this!"

"Of what?"

Thranduil's voice took Celeborn aback, and he spun around to look at the golden-haired Elf. "How do you do it?"

"Do what?" Puzzled, Thranduil abandoned the thought of returning to his rooms and walked up to Celeborn instead. He had known the silver-haired Prince for a long time, but then they had lost touch and he wondered in what ways Celeborn had changed. He found himself growing curious and wondered if he could find out.

"Pass the time! I have nothing to do! I cannot be idle the entire time! I need something to do!" Celeborn's breathing had quickened, seeing and approving of the change that Thranduil had gone through. His next words slipped out unintended. "You are beautiful."

The unexpected compliment brought a blush to Thranduil's face. "Thank you, my old friend."

/Friend… I want to be much more than just your friend./ His body was reacting to the other's closeness and he nervously shuffled his feet, wishing the arousal would fade before Thranduil noticed his current, compromising state.

"So how do you intend to deal with this 'boredom'?" Thranduil now stood in front of Celeborn and wondered about the other's flushed face. Celeborn's body radiated a heat that puzzled him, and although he wasn't touching the silver-haired Elf, the heat still reached him and made his fingertips tingle with the desire to establish some bodily contact.

"I have no idea," admitted Celeborn, who felt dazed, inhaling Thranduil's slightly spicy scent. Why was the other Elf standing so close?

"We could spar, or ride on horseback. I haven't seen much of our surroundings. I wasn't that… lucid… when Haldir brought me here." A hint of insecurity showed when Thranduil mentioned his arrival. "But I don't want to impose, so if you have different plans—"

"No! I have no plans!" Celeborn reacted quickly. "I would like to spend some time with you, and get reacquainted!" He couldn't possibly let this opportunity pass him by! He wanted to be close to Thranduil. That way he might get a chance to woo the other Elf – delicately and subtly. He didn't want to appear too eager just yet. But unbidden lovely images invaded his mind, showing him Thranduil moving beneath him with a pleading expression on his face, begging him to allow him his release; a truly lovely and enchanting sight.

"Celeborn?" Thranduil arched an eyebrow, wondering about the distant expression in the elder Elf's eyes.

"I was… distracted," said Celeborn, hoping Thranduil wouldn't inquire further.

"It looks to me like you are in dire need of some fresh air, my old friend." Thranduil smiled, although he failed to hide the concern in his eyes. Celeborn was acting most peculiarly. Acting instinctively, he linked his arm through Celeborn's.

Celeborn's breath caught at the contact, and he chided himself for acting like an Elfling who had fallen in love for the first time. He was no shy Elfling! "Let us head for the stables and explore our surroundings. I need to feel the air against my face again!"

Thranduil nodded once, understanding his friend. He needed to be out in the open as well.

"Erestor?" Magolion politely knocked on the door to his brother's rooms, not wanting to simply walk in there.

"Yes? You may enter." Erestor sat in front of the mirror, wrestling with his thick, long hair. After washing it, tangles had formed and there was one spot where even his long, agile fingers couldn't reach. Frustrated, he slammed the comb onto the dresser, staring defiantly at his reflection in the mirror. "Where is Glorfindel? Why is he never around when I need him?" Glorfindel had offered Aragorn his services now that their friend was enjoying the first days of marital bliss and his lover wouldn't return to their rooms until late this evening.

Magolion nervously said, "Maybe I can be of assistance?" Looking at Erestor's reflection in the mirror, he caught his brother's surprised expression at hearing his offer. "Only if you are comfortable with it, of course." He had never offered his help in this way before and he understood that Erestor felt a bit suspicious. Gaining his brother's trust would take time.

Erestor debated the matter privately and then nodded once. "There is a spot I cannot reach…"

Magolion sighed, relieved, and walked toward Erestor. He came to a halt behind his brother and accepted the comb when Erestor handed it to him. Gently – and very carefully – he located the tangled hair and began to work on it. Combing Erestor's hair felt strangely intimate, and after removing the tangles, he braided the long hair away from his brother's face. Occasionally he looked in the mirror to determine Erestor's current mood. The surprise he felt himself was reflected in his brother's chocolate brown eyes. "I am sorry that I never acted like an older brother."

Erestor was momentarily speechless – caught up in the intimacy of the moment, but then he found the right words. "I have long forgiven you for that."

"But I haven't forgiven myself." Magolion finished the last braid, tied the plaits with a brown ribbon and then moved in front of Erestor, leaning against the dresser. "I have forgiven myself for some things that I did to you, but…" Magolion felt incredibly vulnerable admitting this to Erestor, "But I am still haunted by memories of you running up to me as an Elfling and begging me to hold and protect you."

Erestor sat quietly, listening, and hearing the guilt and regret in Magolion's voice.

"Elrohir made me realize that I was lashing out at you because I felt hurt. But that is no excuse for the way I treated you." Magolion shrugged once, growing uncomfortable under Erestor's probing gaze. "I am doing my best to make amends, but it can never be enough. You were a child, whilst I had reached majority. I should have known better."

Erestor gave his brother another long, hard look, and then slowly rose from the chair. Seeing Magolion's suddenly alarmed expression, he raised a hand, hoping to reassure his brother. "It is all right."

Uncertain what to expect, Magolion involuntarily held his breath when Erestor's arms unexpectedly enfolded him in a loose hug. Erestor had never embraced him before, and his raging emotions overwhelmed Magolion, who was afraid to return the hug for it might make Erestor pull back. Instead, he allowed Erestor to hold him, and tuck his head beneath his chin. Gingerly, he rested his head against his brother's shoulder and slowly – very slowly – brought up his arms behind Erestor's back to complete the embrace. Erestor's affectionate reaction stunned him, and he greedily accepted the hug. "Thank you," he whispered, "Thank you for forgiving me."

Erestor nodded, and swallowing hard, stroked his brother's long hair. He would have sold his soul to have Magolion act in this manner when he had still been an Elfling in need. It was a terrible shame that so many horrible things had had to happen for them to reach this point. "You are forgiven," he repeated, while rubbing Magolion's back. "We are brothers and it is about time we started acting in that manner."

"Elladan?" Elrohir flopped down onto the bed, on which his twin lay reading.

Elladan looked up from his book, instinctively sensing something important had come up. "Is it Magolion?"

"No," said Elrohir, shaking his head. "Magolion and I are very happy. It is something else; something that has to do with the two of us, Elladan."

Elladan placed the book aside and sat up, crossing his legs beneath him. Elrohir's gloomy expression told him that they were about to discuss something unpleasant. "What is that troubles you?"

"Magolion and I talked and discovered that we aren't ready yet to sail for Valinor. We would like to stay here a little longer." Elrohir moved closer and rested a hand on his twin's knee at seeing his brother's stunned expression. "I know that we agreed we would sail for the Undying Lands together, but I cannot. Not yet." Giving Elladan a moment to compose himself, he remained quiet and waited patiently.

"Why?" Elladan's eyes had widened and he shook his head in disbelief.

"Magolion is finally growing close to Erestor and he wants to build a similar relationship to what we have, my brother. And I… I never gave the decision much thought, as we had already agreed to sail together, but now I find that I want to stay too. In time, Aragorn will pass and our sister will be alone. Someone should be there to offer her comfort."

"But our father is also staying!"

Elrohir moved closer and gathered his twin's hands in his. "I know that you want to sail for Valinor. And I also know how greatly you desire being reunited with our mother. Although I also long for her presence, I feel that my time to sail hasn't come yet. Elladan, I want you to do what you feel is best for you."

Elladan frowned deeply. "Orophin wants to sail, now that Rúmil, Mithrandir and Galadriel will."

"What does your heart tell you?"

Elladan swallowed hard. "My heart tells me to sail and be reunited with our mother. I miss her terribly. I never accepted the fact that she left and my heart is calling me home to Valinor." A panicked expression shone from Elladan's eyes. "But then we will be parted and I don't want you to remain here."

"I will sail for the Undying Lands when Erestor and Glorfindel will. Probably after Aragorn's passing. We will be together again, my brother. This isn't a separation for all eternity. It is only temporary. And what are a few decades to us Elves?"

"I cannot convince you to come with me?" asked Elladan in a pleading tone. He rubbed Elrohir's fingers, trying to intensify their contact.

"I am afraid you cannot." Elrohir looked deeply into his twin's eyes. "I have to do this."

"And I have to sail for Valinor," said Elladan, pained. "Brother, promise you will join me in the Undying Lands. I cannot leave without your promise. I need to know that you will eventually join us."

Elrohir reassuringly squeezed his twin's hands. "I will sail after Aragorn's passing; this I promise."

Elladan released a relieved sigh, knowing this was the best Elrohir could do. "I wish you would come with us when we leave for the Gray Havens tomorrow. I am afraid that I will lose you to some accident or injury and that I will never see you again."

"Dearest brother of mine, I won't die on you." Elrohir leaned in closer and pressed a brotherly kiss onto Elladan's brow. "Don't you know that I will always be here?" he said, placing a hand over Elladan's chest – over his brother's heart. "We chose to belong to the Firstborn, Elladan, and should we ever be separated in death I will wait for you in the Great Halls. This I also promise."

"I never wanted to let you go," said Elladan, managing a weak smile, "But in the end it is inevitable. I hope you will be happy here and do keep a close eye on our father and sister for me."

Elrohir hugged his twin close and savored holding him. Although Elladan was the oldest by mere minutes, Elrohir had often felt his brother's protector. "We will see each other again. I promise."

And Elladan knew that those promises had to do.

Thranduil had enjoyed the time spent with Celeborn. They had explored Minas Tirith and its surroundings, and they had begun rebuilding their old friendship. When dusk came, both were unwilling to part just yet, and Celeborn suggested they have dinner in his rooms, instead of joining the crowd in the great hall. Furthermore, he didn't want to prolong his heartbreak by seeing Galadriel one last time. His wife would depart in the morning, and seeing her again would only increase his anguish.

His instincts warned Thranduil that something troubled his companion, but he didn't want to pry. If Celeborn desired to talk to him about this matter, the elder Elf would do so.

They had seated themselves comfortably, and waited for the servants to finish serving their dinner. Once the maidens had left, Celeborn cast a hesitant look in Thranduil's direction. "Thank you for spending the day with me."

Thranduil wondered if Celeborn was giving him an opening for a conversation about what was troubling the silver-haired Elf, and he decided to take the risk. "You seem weighed down tonight."

"My Lady sails for Valinor tomorrow," said Celeborn in a heavy tone. "My heart is breaking in two. I tried hard not to give into my pain, but now that the time of parting approaches I can no longer deny my hurt."

"Losing your mate after such a long time is painful," said Thranduil slowly, recalling losing Remmen so long ago. He realized it was now his turn to open up. "Only recently did I stop clinging to Remmen's memory. I still feel the loss keenly, but I am finally strong enough to take up the thread of my life again."

Celeborn pushed his own anguish aside and focused on Thranduil – thankful for the distraction the younger Elf provided. "You have recovered nicely since you arrived here."

"I have had help," said Thranduil softly, his tone making it clear to Celeborn that he wasn't going to elaborate on this matter. "You need to take the time to mourn the loss, but don't lose yourself in your grief."

Celeborn managed a weak smile. "Will you stand at my side, my old friend? We were good friends when we still lived in Doriath. Can we reclaim that friendship?"

Thranduil returned the smile. "We will manage."

Erestor fondly looked at Mithrandir. "Ada?" Addressing the Istar in that way was becoming easier, but he wouldn't have the luxury of addressing him in that way much longer, as Mithrandir was ready to sail for Valinor.

"I always knew this day would come, but I never thought I would leave behind a son." His life had changed the day he had found out he sired a child. "I have taught you everything I know and you have gained tight control over your powers." Mithrandir sighed deeply, worried now that they were about to part ways. "At least you have Glorfindel to watch over you." He would worry about Erestor until the day his son joined him in the Undying Lands.

"And Magolion," added Erestor in a gentle tone. "He is trying hard to be a good brother. The fact that he is trying to gain my trust and affection amazes me. He has come a long way."

Mithrandir held Erestor's right hand clasped between his, trying to postpone their parting. "I regret coming into your life as your father at such a late moment in time."

Erestor gave the Istar a doting smile. "You were there when I needed you the most."

"When Sauron tried to break you," clarified Mithrandir. The words eluded him and he hugged Erestor close instead. "I will always love you, my son."

"I know that, Ada, and I want you to know that you have my love too." Erestor lingered in the embrace, but had to let go eventually when Rúmil came to claim Mithrandir.

"It is time we leave," said Rúmil softly, understanding the sorrow of their parting.

As if on cue, Glorfindel appeared beside his lover, and folded one arm around Erestor's waist. "I will keep him safe," promised Glorfindel, meeting Mithrandir's gaze head on.

Mithrandir nodded his head once, smiled and leaned in closer to press a parental kiss onto his son's brow. "May the Valar bless you and watch over you." Next, he moved on and touched his lips to Glorfindel's forehead. "Be his champion, Glorfindel, and make him happy." Tears lurked in Mithrandir's ancient eyes when he allowed Rúmil to lead him away. Looking over his shoulder for one last time, he raised a hand in goodbye.

Erestor managed a smile, clinging to the connection that still ran between him and his father. Mithrandir had assured him that the bond wouldn't fade – no matter the distance between them. Erestor leaned against Glorfindel, relishing the other's close presence and watched Mithrandir and Rúmil walk out of his life.

Tears flowed freely at their parting. Elladan, Orophin, Rúmil, Mithrandir and Galadriel were finally set to leave Minas Tirith and join Frodo in the Gray Havens from where they would set sail for Valinor.

"Brother, don't make me wait too long," said Elladan in an emotional tone, giving his twin a last hug. "I will be there to welcome you when you do decide to join us." Releasing Elrohir from his now death-like grip was something he only managed because Orophin pried his fingers loose from his twin's tunic.

"Come with me, my love," said Orophin softly, embracing Elladan tightly. "It is time to leave." Orophin in turn gave Haldir a look filled with longing; displeased that their eldest brother wasn't joining them on this journey. Haldir, Rúmil and he had said their private goodbyes last night; knowing that they would all be reunited in the future didn't make this parting any easier. "Goodbye," he whispered, pulling Elladan along with him, steering him toward the horses and escort, which were awaiting them.

Rúmil, letting his emotions run free, broke away from Mithrandir and hurried back to Haldir's side, quickly bestowing a tight hug on his elder brother. "Be safe, Haldir."

Haldir smiled weakly. "I survived Helm's Deep, didn't I?"

"Barely!" A tired chuckle left Rúmil's lips, as he reluctantly pulled away from Haldir. Forcing himself to return to Mithrandir's side, he quickly wiped away his tears, refusing to look over his shoulder at Haldir. He held on to the belief that he would see his brother again in Valinor – eventually.

Clearly sensing his lover's melancholy, Mithrandir took Rúmil's hand into his and held on firmly, lending the Galadhel all the strength he needed in order to deal with this separation.

Elrond clung to Lindir. The tears remained adrift in his eyes, as he didn't want to shed them in public. Elladan looked at him from over his shoulder and Elrond nodded encouragingly. Knowing Elladan safe in Valinor would keep him sane when Arwen passed away. He prayed to the Valar that he would find the strength to comfort his daughter when her time finally came.

Elladan broke eye contact with his father and curled his fingers around the letter Elrond had given him for Celebrían. His father hadn't confided its content to him, but he thought he knew what Elrond wanted to tell his wife. Elladan hoped that his mother could accept the fact that Elrond had found a new love and that when his father and Lindir sailed for Valinor, Celebrían would be able to welcome them.

Elrohir came to stand beside his father and wrapped an arm around Elrond. "We will join them in Valinor in time." Watching Elladan mount his horse was one of the hardest things he had ever done and Elrohir reacted instantly, feeling his father tremble beside him. "He will be safer in Valinor than we in Imladris," he said soothingly.

A lump of emotions had formed in Elrond's throat and he didn't trust his voice to hold, so he nodded instead. A cold, graceful hand slipped into his, and he opened his arms to gather Arwen into them. It greatly pained Elrond that his daughter would never see Valinor – would never be reunited with her mother and brothers – and that he would lose her to death eventually. "Weep not, my daughter. For Elrohir and I will stay with you until the very end."

But her father's words offered little comfort and Arwen wept against Elrond's chest. Her gaze stayed with the riders until they had faded from sight, and she wished she had been able to see her mother one last time. But she had made her choice and had to find happiness in the here and now.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 11

Celeborn firmly stood his ground, keeping his head up high and presenting a composed front to his remaining family members. Aragorn, who had stood beside him when the riders had departed, now advanced on his wife and guided Arwen back to their rooms where he could further comfort her.

When Elrond passed him by, Celeborn exchanged a glance with the Peredhel. Understanding showed in Elrond's eyes, and Celeborn knew his son-in-law wouldn't release his grief until he was back in his rooms. They were much alike in that way; hiding their emotions in public and only letting go when surrounded by their loved ones. "We will talk later," he said gravely.

Elrond nodded once and then allowed Lindir to guide him back to their rooms. He let go of Elrohir when Magolion appeared to comfort his son.

In the end, Celeborn and Haldir were left behind, and when the silence became too heavy to bear, the Elven-Lord addressed his adopted son. "I will sorely miss them."

"So will I." Haldir longed to return to Legolas, who had stayed inside in their rooms with little Remmen. "But this parting is only temporary."

Celeborn walked toward Haldir, rested a hand on the younger Elf's shoulder and together they made their way back to their quarters, finding comfort in each other's company.

"You are welcome to stay if you desire company," offered Haldir, seeing Celeborn's lost expression. Maybe it would do the Elf-Lord good to be among close friends now that Galadriel had left.

"I would like that." Celeborn had no desire to return to his empty rooms and he didn't want to take up Thranduil's time completely. Following Haldir's lead, he stepped into the room, and abruptly halted in his tracks. A soft 'Oh', escaped him and he stepped aside to allow Haldir to close the door behind him. He had seldom seen such a lovely sight.

Legolas was on the bed, braiding his long hair, but the younger Elf wasn't the reason why his breathing had quickened. On a rug, near the fire place, was Thranduil, sound asleep with Remmen tightly cuddled against his chest. Thranduil's hair shone like liquid gold, and the flames added a red hue to the long strands. The eyes were vacant with peaceful sleep, and a content smile still lay on his face.

"I reckon my father didn't get much sleep these last few nights," said Legolas teasingly now that Thranduil couldn't hear him. He finished the plait he was working on and then stretched like a cat, before rising from the bed to welcome his husband.

Celeborn swallowed hard, trying to do away with the lump in his throat. Until now, he had never imagined how Thranduil looked, holding a child in his arms, but now that he actually saw it, he thought it was a lovely sight. He had probably looked much like this when he'd had Legolas. "The mind boggles," he whispered, barely audible. "I am still trying to accept that he can have children."

Legolas nodded in understanding. "He does look peaceful – contented." Casting a glance at Haldir, he found the hazel eyes foggy with unshed tears. "Would you like to walk the gardens with me?" With Celeborn and Thranduil present there wouldn't be any privacy for them. "My father will watch over Remmen."

"And I will watch over your father whilst they are asleep," offered Celeborn, barely realizing the words had actually left his lips. He had merely intended to think them!

Haldir gave his adoptive father an inquisitive look. The last time Celeborn had sounded this – What was it? Protective? – had been when the Elf-Lord had pronounced the three brothers part of his family.

Celeborn actually averted his eyes, unwilling to risk Haldir reading the truth in them.

"We accept your kind offer," said Legolas eventually when Haldir remained quiet. "We will return here shortly."

"Take your time," whispered Celeborn, sitting down in the rocking chair, as the door closed behind Legolas and Haldir. He would savor every minute of looking after Thranduil and Remmen.

Celeborn left the rocking chair to collect a blanket from the bed. Tucking it in around Thranduil's form, he sat down cross-legged beside the younger Elf, closely studying the vacant eyes. He was severely tempted to press a kiss on the golden mane, but he managed to restrain himself just in time. He couldn't take advantage of Thranduil in that way.

/How do I woo him? How do I convince him that I love him? Will he even believe me? My dear wife just sailed for Valinor and I am already lusting after him./ But the well of passion had long run dry in his marriage, and although he valued and loved Galadriel as a companion, he didn't desire her in that way any more. But he *did* desire Thranduil.

"You seem distant to me."

Thranduil's voice almost made Celeborn jump to his feet; he had never noticed the Elf waking up. "You are supposed to be asleep."

Thranduil smiled, stretched, and moved Remmen in his arms. Sitting up, he cradled the Elfling against him. "Why are you here?" Celeborn was the last person he had expected to see in his son's rooms.

"Those sailing for Valinor have ridden for the Havens and Haldir offered—"

"Say no more." Thranduil's eyes spoke of understanding, but he lacked the right words to convey his feelings. So he remained quiet instead, and simply smiled at Celeborn. Long moments passed until he finally broke the silence between them. "Would you like to hold him? It has been a while since you last held a baby in your arms."

Celeborn nodded. "That was Arwen…" Arwen was the last Elfling he had held. "May I?"

Thranduil carefully placed Remmen in Celeborn's arms and chuckled softly when the silver-haired Elf began to rock the baby. "You like children, don't you?"

"Yes," admitted Celeborn, breathlessly. "I loved rocking my daughter, and later my grand children." He had always wanted a large family and when Haldir and his brothers had entered his life, he hadn't hesitated to make them a part of his family. Lifting his eyes, he made eye contact with Thranduil. "May I ask you something very personal?"

Thranduil arched an eyebrow, and then nodded once, curious to find out what Celeborn wanted to know.

"Can you… Can you still have children… or?" He didn't know himself why he had asked that question and Celeborn bit his bottom lip in embarrassment. However, he was relieved to see a grin surface on Thranduil's face; apparently the question hadn't offended the younger Elf.

"I think so." Thranduil leaned back against the wall, watching Celeborn rock Remmen. "Why do you wish to know?"

"I am just curious," mumbled Celeborn, softly – wondering about his own motives for asking. Why had he said that?

"Ah, I see…" But Thranduil's eyes had narrowed, still wondering what had possessed Celeborn to ask that question.

"I miss them already," admitted Haldir in a pained tone. Legolas and he had settled down in a secluded section of the gardens. The trees that surrounded them moved their branches until the two Elves were completely hidden from view and comfortably cradled inside their wooden arms, which had become a safe nest for them. "I still remember a time when they were Elflings and depended on me." The truth was that he had enjoyed fussing over them – even long after they had reached majority. "I feel…" The words failed him and he pleadingly looked at Legolas, who sat beside him, resting his back against the trunk of a tree.

Legolas moistened his lips, wishing he could take his husband's pain away, but he couldn't. He could only try to dampen Haldir's anguish. "What if I let you fuss over me instead?"

Haldir smiled, touched. "You are a skilled warrior, my love. Why would you need fussing over?"

"Because I know you," replied Legolas softly. "You need someone to fuss over. So I will let you take care of Remmen and me." All these feelings of protectiveness, even possessiveness that raged inside Haldir needed a way out, and he was proving his beloved with one. "I will let you pamper us."

A grin formed on Haldir's face. "You would really let me?" His fingertips caressed Legolas' face, and then slid down his husband's throat, carefully touching the sensitive skin there. The anguish his brothers' departure had caused was still there, but Legolas had cunningly redirected his attention. "I love you, Legolas." Humming softly, he slowly unbuttoned Legolas' shirt. Haldir pushed the fabric aside, revealing soft, pink skin. "I will always love you."

Allowing Haldir to maneuver him into the desired position, Legolas gave in and lay down on his back. Longingly, he stared at Haldir, whose deft fingers were already undoing the lacing of his breeches. "Here? Now?"

"Let me love you." Haldir liked his lips, leaned in closer and left a trail of kisses down Legolas' hairless, smooth chest. "Are you certain you don't wish to practice making another Elfling?"

Legolas smiled warmly. "I am certain. Haldir, love, we should wait until Remmen is a few years old before having another baby. Two might be too much to handle. And we have time."

"Then we will practice making love instead," said Haldir, whispering the words against the head of Legolas' already hard flesh. "I know I will enjoy it."

Legolas rested his hands on Haldir's shoulders and gave his husband a long, hard look. The expression in the hazel eyes was unknown to him. He had never seen such tenderness – worship almost – in his beloved's eyes before.

Running the tip of his tongue over Legolas' erection, Haldir curled his fingers around the hard flesh. Intent on pleasuring his beloved, Haldir relaxed his throat and took in Legolas' length. His fingers softly massaged the base and he cradled his lover's testes in the palm of his other hand. Within seconds, he had Legolas moaning in need, and squirming beneath him. Looking at the golden-haired Elf, Haldir read many things in the azure eyes and one of them was the expectation of being taken tonight. But Haldir had different plans.

"Oh, no…" Legolas whimpered disappointedly when Haldir moved away from him, stopping the sensual stimulation. But his eyes began to twinkle with mirth and expectation at finding Haldir shedding his clothes. "Return to me, my love. I need your touch!"

Haldir threw his clothes onto the grass and straddled Legolas. Cocking his head, he studied the golden-haired beauty. "You mean the world to me, Legolas. You are my life; you know that, don't you?"

"I am beginning to suspect as much," replied Legolas teasingly, lifting his hips in a mute plea for Haldir's lips to close over his throbbing erection again.

"So eager… and mine," whispered Haldir absentmindedly, lost in admiration of the squirming body beneath him.

Legolas released a strangled moan when Haldir dove toward him. A moment later, a warm tongue swirled over the tip of his erection and soft lips wrapped around him. Thrusting upward, his fingers clawed the grass beneath him. "Oh, the things you do to me!"

Haldir grinned cheekily, shifted, and positioned himself above his lover's shaft.

Finally realizing his beloved's intention, Legolas bit his bottom lip. He looked expectantly at Haldir, and when his lover finally took himself, Legolas threw back his head in surrender, allowing Haldir to dictate the pace of their love making.

Haldir growled softly when he completed their union. From that moment on, they communicated via touch and thrust, and the sensations took them higher until they finally reached release together. Lips locked, tongues dueled and the air was heavy with moans.

When Haldir finally released Legolas' lips and lay down beside him, he searched the azure eyes, and found them happy and content. Just the way they were supposed to be.

Two weeks later…

Elrond, Lindir, Elrohir, Magolion, Erestor and Glorfindel were finally on their way home to Imladris. They had taken their time saying their temporary goodbyes to the inhabitants of Minas Tirith, and Elrond had promised his daughter and son-in-law that he would visit again shortly. In the meantime however, the Peredhel's thoughts were centered on the Last Homely House and the few Elves that had agreed to stay until their ruler would eventually sail for Valinor. Elrond felt particularly blessed to have his lover, son and best friends close. If everything went according to plan, his servants had readied the Last Homely House for their arrival.

Elrohir saw the distant look in his father's eyes and chose not to disturb Elrond's thoughts. Instead, he looked at Magolion and smiled fondly at his lover. In retrospect, he had to agree whole-heartedly that it had been too soon for them to sail for the Undying Lands. Their place was still here.

Magolion returned the smile when he felt Elrohir's eyes upon him, but his gaze returned to linger on Erestor. During these last few weeks, he had tried hard to truly befriend his brother and he was slowly making progress. He felt encouraged, realizing Erestor also wanted to make this work, and his younger brother was truly trying hard to deepen their new relationship.

Erestor was too focused on Glorfindel to notice that he was at the center of his brother's attention. Last night, Glorfindel had finally given him that night of unbridled passion the blond had owed him, and Erestor vaguely wondered if his beloved Balrog Slayer still felt sore. Riding a horse for most of the day couldn't be comfortable after Glorfindel had been on the receiving end of their lovemaking.

Lindir unexpectedly began to sing softly – a calming and pleasant melody that soon had everyone humming along. The minstrel enjoyed being on the road again.

All six Elves looked forward to finally arriving home again and were very startled when an infant's wailing scream cut through the forest air.

"What?" Glorfindel stood in the stirrups, already trying to pinpoint the direction the wail had come from. A sobbing sound, bordering on hysteria erupted from the right, and Glorfindel took the lead.

Elrond and Elrohir followed, signaling for Erestor and Lindir to stay behind them, as father and son weren't sure if they were headed for danger. The adviser and minstrel obeyed, though Erestor was a little peeved at being seen as defenseless. He should be riding up front as he commanded powers that could easily destroy any enemy. But he obeyed, trusting in Elrond.

Glorfindel's breath caught at the horrible scene in front of him. Yes, they had done away with Uruk-Hai and Orcs, but wild beasts still lived in this forest, and by the looks of it, bears had caught a family by surprise, killing the parents. Glorfindel quickly dismounted and checked on the two adult Elves. Mother and father were dead and their souls had hopefully reached the Halls of Waiting by now.

Elrond arrived next at the scene and slid off of his horse's back. He drew his sword, just in case the bears still lingered nearby and planned to return for the wailing baby.

The baby was bundled up in a sheet, and when Elrohir finally reached the sobbing Elfling, he quickly picked him up and cradled him against his chest. "Ada? What do we do?"

Magolion had decided against rushing ahead and had stayed close to Lindir and Erestor instead, as he couldn't completely rule out the possibility of this being an ambush and he wanted to be there to defend them if necessary.

Finally dismounting as well, Erestor advanced on Glorfindel, who was sitting on his heels, covering up the parents' remains. "Are they both dead?" He read the answer in Glorfindel's eyes and Erestor swallowed hard.

"There is nothing we can do for the dead, but we can attend to the living," said Elrond, who now walked over to his son to check on the baby. "Is the child injured?"

"I don't think he is. I can't detect any injures on his body." Elrohir instinctively held the child close to his chest. "Ada, what do we do?"

Elrond sighed deeply and looked about. It was true; they could do nothing for the dead, but the child needed help. "We will take him with us to Imladris."

"And their bodies?" Magolion dismounted and came to a standstill beside Glorfindel. "We cannot leave them here. The beasts that killed them will come back to feed on them."

"Bury them," said Elrond softly. "And then join us again. Now that we have a child with us, we need to hurry."

"Ada? Can you take him?" Elrohir had some experience handling children as Elladan and he had looked after Arwen regularly, but when their sister had still been small, Elrond hadn't allowed them to hold her. The last thing Elrohir wanted was to accidentally upset the baby. Elrond had the most experience when it came down to handling babies.

Elrond had expected that request – and had also feared it. It had been millennia since he had last looked after a baby and he felt a bit rusty himself.

Erestor read Elrond like an open book and intervened. "Hand him to me, Elrohir. I will look after the little one." The clearly audible sigh escaping Elrond's lips made him smile knowingly. When the twins had been little, Elrond hadn't known what to do with them. Once they had grown older, Elrond had become extremely fond of them because they would study with him. They had finally been able to communicate with him. Not many people knew Elrond felt lost when dealing with babies. Celebrían and he had often been called upon to care for the twins, and later Arwen, because Elrond had felt overwhelmed.

Elrohir arched an eyebrow, but complied and handed the infant to Erestor.

"He cannot be older than a few days," whispered Erestor in surprise. "She must have given birth to him within the last week." The boy already sported a few red-golden hairs and the most amazingly blue eyes stared back at him. "I wonder if she named him."

"I am afraid that we will never find out," said Lindir who now stood at Erestor's side and tried to catch a glimpse of the child. "He will probably be hungry."

"We don't have any milk with us," realized Elrohir. It would take them one more day at least to reach Imladris and that was if they rode nonstop.

"But we have some fruit," pointed out Elrond, who moved back to his horse and uncovered peaches and oranges from his saddlebags. "We can make this into a mash and feed it to him."

"Why aren't Legolas or Thranduil around when you need them?" mused Elrohir aloud. "They know how to handle a baby!"

Elrond mounted his horse and signaled for the others to follow. Whilst the rest of the party mounted and steered their horses away from the horrible scene, Magolion and Glorfindel stayed behind to perform this last grim duty for their fallen kin.

Erestor carefully spooned the mashed fruits into the Elfling's mouth. "Please, little one, you need to eat!" But the baby's listless eyes showed a clear disinterest in the food. It had been millennia since he had last fought this battle. Back then it had been Elladan who had refused to eat. Lindir knelt beside him and Erestor gave his friend a pleading look. "He needs to eat!"

Lindir nodded once and then began to sing a soft lullaby, designed to soothe the infant. It seemed to work and Erestor finally managed to spoon some of the mash into the baby's mouth.

Elrohir and Elrond stood close, watching the scene with interest. "Ada? What do we do with the little one once we reach Imladris? There are no females left that can raise him."

"Then we will have to raise him ourselves." Elrond shook his head. Why had the Valar put this child in his way? He was much too old to be raising an Elfling! His gaze came to rest on his youngest son, and he wondered if Elrohir would be interested in assuming a parental role.

"Elrond? We cannot possibly keep him with us!" Erestor's eyes had widened overhearing father and son talk.

"And where do you suggest we send him?" Elrond shook his head. "This little one should be raised by and among his kindred. Imladris is still a safe place and the best option."

"We could send him to Legolas and Thranduil," said Lindir softly. The fact that the child had lost his parents caused him grief, and he had instantly felt lost when looking into those big, blue eyes. "But I would rather keep him."

"We can never replace his parents," said Erestor, musing aloud.

"But we can be the next best thing." Elrohir had closed his eyes, but they opened again when the corpses of the child's parents appeared in his mind's eye. "We cannot abandon him."

Elrond found himself sighing again, realizing they were determined to keep the infant. "He will need a name if he is to stay with us." Looking at Lindir, he saw the delight in his beloved's eyes, and he just knew Lindir had already adopted the little one. Hanging his head in defeat, he realized there would be countless nights filled with the crying of an Elfling, getting up at impossible times to feed the boy and sitting in Celebrían's old rocking chair in order to soothe the baby.

Lindir rose from the ground, hurried over to Elrond and wrapped the half-Elf in a warm hug. "Thank you."

"You have no idea what you have just volunteered for," whispered Elrond, still shaking his head.

"We will help," said Elrohir, who tightly clasped Magolion's hand in his. "And don't forget you have the most experience when it comes down to tending to babies."

Still shaking his head Elrond said, "That is where you are wrong. Erestor is the experienced one. He rocked the three of you when you were Elflings." Elrohir's eyes widened at this revelation and Elrond cringed.

Elrohir's gaze fastened on Erestor, clearly seeing the ease and comfort with which the advisor handled the baby. "Ada, I never you knew you shied away from rocking us!"

"Erestor is a natural when it comes down to handling children," said Elrond, somewhat defensively. Only then did he register Elrohir's sly grin. His son had been playing him! "Oh, just wait until he starts teething! You can sit with him then!"

"Just ignore them, little one. They always argue. Just stay with me," whispered Erestor, relieved that the baby now swallowed the mash willingly.

"Mother hen," said Elrond, his eyes flashing with mirth.

Erestor arched an eyebrow at the half-Elf. Elrond had also called him that when he had helped Celebrían taking care of the twins. He calmly lifted his right hand, pointed his finger at Elrond and the Peredhel unexpectedly released a yelp.

"Why did you do that?" Elrond rubbed his buttock, where a small fire had teased his flesh. He was surprised that Erestor had used his powers in this way – and that the other Elf could control them so precisely.

"That will teach you to refrain from calling me that in the future," said Erestor slyly. Focusing his attention once more on the Elfling, who was falling asleep, he whispered, "You lost your parents, little one, but we will do our best to give you all the love you need."

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 12

Thranduil had offered to help reconstruct the last buildings that had been destroyed in the attack on Minas Tirith and was now overseeing the workers. Seeing that the Men were tiring, he called for a rest and sent them off to the kitchen for a meal. In the meantime he would explore one building which had suffered extreme damage when a series of fire balls had hit it. He had to determine if it was still salvageable.

Entering the house, he proceeded extremely carefully. The roof had come down and craters had been created in the floor. The building was very unstable and could come down around him at any given moment.

Thranduil realized he was in danger as long as he stayed inside the collapsed building, and judged it better to leave. He was about to turn around and head back to the doorway when a soft rumble within the collapsed roof warned him that trouble was afoot. He prepared to leap toward the doorway, but wooden beams and rocks unexpectedly crashed onto him, causing him to lose his footing and to slip into one of the deeper craters. The wind was knocked out on him, and he didn't even manage a scream to alarm any bystanders.

He hit the bottom of the crater with a loud thud, and a sharp rock that landed on the back of his head caused him to lose consciousness.

"Ada!" Legolas, who had been resting with Remmen in his arms, sat up, startled and big-eyed. "Ada!" The panic that coursed through him rubbed off on Remmen who instantly began to cry loudly.

The door was flung open and Celeborn entered, quickly advancing on the bed. "Legolas? What is amiss?" He had been in his rooms when he had heard the scream and had hurried here, afraid that something terrible had happened to the baby. Why else would Legolas scream in panic? /But wait, he called out for his father! This is about Thranduil!/

Legolas shook like a leaf, grabbed Celeborn by the collar and stared into the Elf-Lord's worried eyes. "It is my father. He is hurt, I can sense it. You have to find him!"

Aragorn, who had also heard the screams, now hurried over to the bed and sat down on Legolas' other side. "What is it, my friend?"

"It is my father. You have to find him! Our connection is fading!" Legolas released Celeborn from his hold and tried his best to comfort Remmen, who was sobbing. "Oh, I am so sorry to have startled you, pen-neth, but…"

"We will find your father," promised Aragorn, who now rose from the bed to follow Celeborn out of the room. "I know where to find him. He was overseeing some repairs and—"

"Please, Aragon, go… He needs help."

Legolas' pleading tone told Aragorn to hurry and alongside Celeborn he ran toward the construction site, eager to check on his best friend's father.

/Please, by the Valar, don't let his wound be mortal!/ Celeborn prayed fervently to the Valar to keep Thranduil safe. He had never thought this could happen! /I cannot lose him now!/ Thranduil had finally begun to seek out his company these last few days and Celeborn secretly planned to shortly tell the golden-haired Elf of his love for him.

"Sire!" One of the workers who had returned early to the site immediately addressed his King. "The building collapsed and we cannot find King Thranduil. He has disappeared!"

"He is inside that building!" Celeborn's eyes blazed with fire. "Thranduil, I will get you out of there, I promise!" He removed his outer robes and was about to find a way inside the collapsed building when he felt Aragorn's hand on his arm – restraining him. "Let go of me! He needs me!"

"We need to be cautious or we will end up beneath that pile of ruble as well," said Aragorn, hoping to calm Celeborn down. He had seldom seen the distinguished Elf-Lord this upset. "We need to clear the debris away first."

"Thranduil might not have that much time!" Celeborn shook off Aragorn's arm and sought a way inside. Behind him, he heard Aragorn sigh and then footfalls sounded close. "What do you think you are doing?" He stared at Aragorn in disapproving disbelief. "You are King here! You cannot endanger your life in this way!"

Aragorn arched an eyebrow. "And you can?"

Frustrated, Celeborn released a deep sigh. "Be careful where you tread!"

"I can say the same thing to you."

Celeborn glared at Aragorn; never before had he realized how stubborn the Man could be. But it was that stubbornness and single-mindedness that had defeated Sauron.

Moving slowly and hoping that no more of the building would collapse, they made their way over to the craters. One of them was blocked with a large beam. The wood was still shifting slightly, indicating that this was the place where Thranduil was buried. "We need to clear the entrance to that crater," whispered Celeborn.

Aragorn nodded and grabbed hold of one end of the beam, whilst Celeborn began to lift it from the other end. Both were panting hard by the time they had deposited the beam on the floor, and Celeborn eagerly peered into the gaping hole. "I can see him." Thranduil's golden hair provided him with a perfect beacon in the darkness. Celeborn began to lower himself into the crater, ignoring Aragorn's distraught expression. "I have to do this!"

Aragorn didn't like this one bit, but allowed it, knowing that Celeborn possessed more strength and agility than he did. The Elf stood a greater chance of rescuing Thranduil. Looking to his right, he found that workers and soldiers were clearing their path, providing them with an easy way out once Celeborn would return with Thranduil.

Celeborn's heart occasionally missed a beat, having lost touch with its natural rhythm in his worry for Thranduil. He jumped the last space to the bottom of the crater, and once his feet made contact with the ground, sat on his heels beside the unconscious Elf. He immediately checked for a pulse and was immensely relieved to find Thranduil alive. "I will get you out of here," he vowed solemnly.

"Maybe this will help!" called out Aragorn from above, lowering a rope into the crater.

Celeborn took hold of the rope and considered his options. In the end, he carefully draped his unconscious charge over his shoulder. Holding on tight to the rope, he allowed the workers to pull him back to the surface.

Aragorn reached for Celeborn once the Elf-Lord emerged from the pit. Together, they briefly rested Thranduil's body on the ground to check on him.

"Where is Elrond when we need a healer?"

"Don't despair," said Aragorn soothingly. "I am skilled in the art of healing as well." His hands moved over Thranduil's head and then descended to rest on the Elf's chest. "We need to take him to the House of Healing where I can probably examine him."

Celeborn nodded; part of his panic had faded now that he knew Thranduil was still alive. "Please let me carry him." Aragorn's eyes widened and Celeborn instantly realized what he had given away, but he didn't care right now. All that mattered was that Thranduil got the medical attention that he needed.

Aragorn's expression softened. "Of course may you carry him. Follow me." He gave Celeborn a smile filled with understanding. He had often wondered about the Lord of the Golden Wood; Galadriel was impressive, maybe even intimidating at times, and he had wondered what it would be like to have her for a wife. He had seen the respect in Celeborn's eyes when Galadriel was close and figured the love between them had long ago changed to mutual trust and admiration, as he had never sensed any passion between them.

Celeborn gently lifted Thranduil from the ground and cradled him against his chest. "Someone needs to let Legolas know that his father is alive."

Aragorn nodded and instructed one of his guards to deliver the news to his friend. Legolas would probably join them in the House of Healing as quickly as possible and in the meantime, he would look after Thranduil to the best of his abilities.

"Where is he?" Legolas, with Remmen tightly clutched against his chest, marched into the House of Healing in search of his father.

"Please calm down, love. Your father is alive, you know that." Haldir was still trying to calm Legolas down, but to no avail.

"I need to see him!" Legolas frantically looked about. Remmen didn't like the way he was being carried and began to cry softly. Legolas absentmindedly patted his son's hair. "Hush now."

"Give Remmen to me," said Haldir, realizing Legolas was too focused on Thranduil to properly care for their son. He managed to pry Legolas' fingers off of Remmen and buried his son in his protective arms. "Go, look for him!" He hadn't completely uttered those words yet when Legolas already left his side to search the rooms.

Legolas checked one room after another and finally heard Aragorn's voice. Using it as a beacon, he honed in on his friend's voice and soon stood at the foot end of his father's bed. "Ada!" Legolas hardly noticed Celeborn, who was seated on the bedside and holding Thranduil's hand. Nor did he pay Aragorn any attention when his friend assured him that his father would make a full recovery. He only had eyes for Thranduil.

Thranduil had closed his eyes in an attempt to lock out the nausea and vertigo, but opened them at hearing his son's worried tone. "Legolas…" He smiled tiredly and managed to partly lift his arm, beckoning his son to sit down.

Legolas sat down heavily on the bed and leaned in closer to carefully hug his father. "Oh, Ada!"

Aragorn smiled at seeing them reunited, but then voiced a warning. "Don't hug him too tightly, Legolas. Your father has suffered two broken ribs and a concussion. He should rest for a while."

Legolas carefully pulled back and stared into his father's slightly unfocused eyes. "How could you be so careless?"

Using his last bit of strength, Thranduil sought out his son's hand and squeezed it weakly. "It… just… happened." He would explain later, once he felt better. Right now his stomach was cramping, and it felt like Orcs were trying to squeeze the brains out of his skull – and then there was that incredibly unpleasant pressure in his chest, which made it hard to breathe. Unconsciousness tugged at his mind and he was severely tempted to give in, as it would result in a healing sleep. "Talk… later…"

"You should let him sleep now," said Aragorn, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Celeborn and I have watched over him since the accident and feel confident that there will be no permanent damage."

Celeborn… Legolas' eyes narrowed thoughtfully, finding that Celeborn was gently rubbing Thranduil's fingers. Next, he examined Celeborn's eyes, which gaze had never left Thranduil's face. What he read in those ancient eyes surprised him. It was as if a veil had been lifted, finally showing him the elder Elf's true feelings. Why had he never noticed it before? Because he hadn't been looking for it. But there it was; love.

"Your father is stronger than he looks," said Celeborn, more in an effort to reassure himself than Legolas. He couldn't bring himself to let go of the injured Elf's hand, even though it was earning him curious looks. "He will make a full recovery within the next few weeks."

A bright grin and a soft glow shone from Legolas' face, realizing his father had someone at his side who deeply cared for him. He had been worried when his father had fallen for Éomer, as the mortal could never be his father's mate, but Celeborn was a whole different matter. Celeborn was an Elf, immortal, wise and experienced. The former ruler of the Golden Wood would be a worthy mate for his father.

Haldir appeared in the doorway, having finally calmed Remmen down, whose crying had worsened after Legolas had left. He cringed, seeing that bruises had formed at Thranduil's right temple. The Elven King looked fragile and he expected Legolas to want to remain at his father's side until Thranduil had recovered. Therefore he was stunned when Legolas rose from the bed and returned to his side. "Don't you wish to stay?"

Legolas leaned in closer to make sure his words only reached Haldir. "I have the feeling Celeborn will watch him for me." He suggestively wriggled an eyebrow, hoping his husband understood the hint.

Haldir's eyes grew big, finally realizing what Legolas was implying. "Celeborn and Thranduil?"

"I don't know my father's feelings in this," said Legolas, pulling Haldir into the corridor where they could talk more freely, "But the gaze in Celeborn's eyes speaks of love." Now that he knew his father was safe and well taken care of, it was easier for him to step back and let Celeborn take his place. "And I must say that he would make a good mate for my father."

"Galadriel sailed only weeks ago," said Haldir thoughtfully.

Legolas nodded in understanding. "But we don't know for how long Celeborn has felt this way."

"I have heard that Celeborn was determined to rescue your father himself, although Aragorn tried to keep him back." Haldir soothingly rubbed Remmen's back when the baby impatiently tugged at his tunic, demanding his attention. "Celeborn has always been like a father for me and I love him dearly…"

"But?" Legolas fell into step beside Haldir when they began their way back to their rooms.

"I also agree that he would make a good mate for your father, but I am worried about Thranduil. He has mourned losing Remmen for so long, then he had this… affair with Éomer and now Celeborn is interested in him in that way. I wonder what impact all this will have on your father."

"My father makes his own choices. I don't know why he gave in to the desire to be with Éomer. I thank the Valar daily that he isn't mourning the loss, but… Maybe you are right. Is he ready to have a serious, committed relationship?" The grin that unexpectedly sneaked across Haldir's features surprised him. "What is it?"

"We are already worrying about Thranduil and considering his future whilst we don't even know if he returns Celeborn's feelings. Your father never mentioned being attracted to Celeborn before. Maybe this is just one-sided?"

"Only time will tell," said Legolas eventually, giving the matter some thought. "I do want my father to be happy and he seemed happy with Éomer. I liked it when he radiated happiness and contentment." And if Celeborn could bring that to Thranduil's life he would happily accept that, but the question was; did his father feel the same way about Celeborn? Maybe he could find out.

"Would you like me to carry him for a while?" Lindir gave Erestor a pleading look.

Erestor gave his friend a thankful smile. He had carried the Elfling in his arms for the last few hours and he was beginning to feel heavy. "But of course, my friend." Erestor carefully placed the baby in Lindir's arms and showed his friend how to properly support the tiny body. "He has been asleep for the last hour. Let's hope he will stay that way." The child had already proven that he possessed formidable lungs and Lindir had teasingly remarked he would make a good singer in time.

"The baby needs a name," said Elrond, who rode at Lindir's side, keeping an eye on his beloved and the Elfling. The child had golden hair, streaked with a soft red, and the sky-blue eyes gave him a slightly exotic look.

"How about…" Erestor paused, cocked his head and cast a triumphant look at Glorfindel, who together with Magolion had rejoined the party. "How about Collfindel?"

Glorfindel's eyes widened dramatically. "Why that?"

"His hair is a red golden, much like yours, my love," pointed out Erestor. "Or don't you wish to share part of your name with the little one?"

"Collofin," said Lindir quickly, anticipating the upcoming banter between Erestor and Glorfindel. The baby's blue eyes opened and the Elfling gave him a surprisingly serious look. "Do you like that name, pen-neth?"

"I could live with that…" said Glorfindel grumpily. He didn't really mind sharing part of his name with the baby, but he knew Erestor would find ways to mercilessly tease him with it. "Collofin sounds nice." Cocking his head, he leaned in closer and gave the Elfling a warm smile. "Hello there, nice to make your acquaintance, Collofin. You chose a strange family to grow up in, I can assure you that. One word of warning; don't ever think it is fashionable to always wear black. The color won't suit you anyway and… Ouch! What was that for?" Pretending to be annoyed, he stared at Erestor, who had cuffed him on the head. "I was just trying to be a responsible parent!"

"Parent?" Elrohir gave Glorfindel a lopsided grin. "Parent? You?"

"I would do a great job as a parent!" Glorfindel, pouting, stuck out his tongue at Elrohir. "We raised you!"

"And look where it got me!" teased Elrohir wickedly.

Elrond cleared his throat, trying to restore some semblance of order. "Collofin it is."

"And now we must decide who will be the baby's main caregivers," said Erestor thoughtfully.

"We will all help," said Magolion quickly, finally seeing a chance to be a big and protective brother after all. Maybe he could make amends to Erestor by showing his brother that he was doing his best to help raise the baby.

"Yes, we will," said Elrond, "But the child will need parents – role models."

Lindir had studied Elrond for some time and had realized that his beloved really didn't feel comfortable with the idea of raising another baby and he respected that. He did feel confident that he would get more than enough quality time with the Elfling without being the primary caregiver.

Elrond nodded once, feeling grateful, as Lindir's face was an open book to him. His gaze shifted to Elrohir and Magolion, and although Elrohir smiled brightly at the baby, he didn't think they were old and wise enough to be raising a child. Elrohir and Magolion needed to be lovers before they could become parents. That left Erestor and Glorfindel.

"Oh no… I don't think so," said Erestor, who easily read Elrond's intention in the gray eyes. "I told you Arwen was the last Elfling I would help you raise!"

Collofin had woken up due to their talking and now opened his mouth, releasing a terrifying wail. Lindir, startled, stared at the tiny bundle in shock.

"Told you he had formidable lungs," said Glorfindel deadpanned.

Lindir hadn't expected such noise and stared helplessly at Erestor. "You take him! He was asleep in your arms!" He quickly placed the baby in Erestor's arms.

Erestor cringed as the sound volume doubled. "This won't work." They had to find out who the baby liked best. "Elrohir, you try calming him down!"

Elrohir accepted the baby into his arms, but Collofin wouldn't stop crying and Magolion tried his luck next, but… Collofin's screams intensified.

Elrond shook his head when Magolion tried to place the wailing Elfling into his arms, so Collofin ended up in Glorfindel's arms instead. The noise miraculously stopped. Five heads turned to look at Glorfindel and Collofin who now began to coo and giggle.

"Elbereth be thanked," mumbled Elrond gratefully. "Glorfindel, you are now Collofin's official caregiver. The baby chose you himself."

Glorfindel swallowed hard – briefly shocked –but then his expression brightened and he gave Erestor a stunning smile. "Collofin, say hello to Nana…"

Erestor growled low in his throat, shook his head in warning and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Guess who is sleeping on the couch tonight."

"Not us, are we, Collofin? You are a tiny Elfling and you belong in a bed. Can't have a baby sleep on the couch, and as I am your caregiver I get to sleep in the bed as well." Glorfindel smiled charmingly at Erestor and ignored the pained moans coming from Elrond. "I hope the couch will be comfortable."

Erestor glared and remained quiet. In reality he was amused and delighted, but he couldn't show that to Glorfindel, could he? It would take away the reason for their bantering. And he loved to verbally banter with his love. Seeing Collofin in his lover's arms caused his heart to go weak. /Oh, I love you, you stubborn Balrog Slayer./

"Love you too," said Glorfindel honestly, giving his love a warm look. "Always…"

Collofin remained quiet in Glorfindel's arms for the next hour, but then began to cry softly. This time it was Erestor who came to the rescue. When they had stopped to make camp for the night, he had gathered the remaining fruits and had made a mash for the Elfling.

"Erestor… He is crying… and he is wet." Glorfindel's nose wrinkled at the smell.

"Find me a piece of clean cloth to wrap him in," said Erestor, removing the damp piece of fabric and disposing of it. Hearing fabric being shredded into sections, he looked up and found that Glorfindel was using parts of his own cloak to make a diaper for Collofin. "You were very fond of that riding cloak."

"The little one needs it more than I do." Glorfindel sat on his heels beside Erestor and together they wrapped the fabric tightly around the baby. "I never thought I would ever be doing this."

"I feel the same way, Glorfindel. But the Valar have willed differently, and we cannot abandon Collofin, can we?" He settled the baby comfortably in one arm and began to spoon feed the little one. "What he really needs is his mother."

"But she is dead," said Glorfindel gravely. "And we are all he has left now. We need to make the best of it. You will be his mother," added Glorfindel teasingly, trying to lighten the tone of their conversation.

"I am not his mother!" But Erestor smiled warmly at the baby, who obediently swallowed the mash. "You must be hungry, pen-neth. I am sorry we don't have any milk for you."

Glorfindel sat down beside Erestor and wrapped an arm around his love. "Can you imagine what his life will be like with us as his parents?"

Erestor leaned against Glorfindel and rested his head on his lover's shoulder. "Elrond will claim him once the boy can read… and I have the feeling Lindir will teach him the finer arts."

"I can see Elrohir taking him for a swim and reintroducing some of the twins' mischief to Imladris," added Glorfindel, giddily.

"And Magolion can teach him how to ride." Erestor saw Glorfindel's arched eyebrow and quickly added, "You are his father now, Glorfindel…" The eyebrow arched even more. "And yes, you may teach him how to use a sword."

"And what will you teach our new son, love?" Glorfindel placed the now empty bowl aside and watched Erestor rub the baby's back, trying to make him burp.

"I will teach him to love unconditionally," said Erestor, giving Glorfindel a meaningful look.

"He will learn from the best then." Glorfindel swallowed hard, knowing very well that he wouldn't have made it without Erestor's unconditional love. It was that very love and dedication that had overcome the hurdles thrown in their path. He was about to kiss Erestor when Collofin suddenly burped, giggled and grabbed a handful of Glorfindel's hair.

"He has a thing for blonds," whispered Erestor sensually.

"He isn't the only one, is he, love?" Glorfindel wrapped his arms around Erestor and the Elfling and didn't let Collofin's giggle hold him back from kissing his dark-haired love on the lips.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 13

Now that Collofin had quieted down again, Elrohir pleaded with Erestor to let him carry the Elfling. Elrohir had been waiting for this opportunity for some time, and was delighted when Erestor gave in and placed the baby in his arms. "He is so tiny," commented Elrohir, giving Magolion a thoughtful smile. "My father didn't allow me to hold Arwen when she was still this young. He was probably worried I would drop her."

"On her head," supplied Elrond deadpanned. He had given the matter some thought and accepted an Elfling would rule his house for the next few years. His friends and his lover had already accepted Collofin into their hearts and being honest with himself, he had to admit to having a weak spot for the boy himself. But he knew better than to volunteer his services, having experienced long nights filled with crying and screams. Oh, no, he wasn't volunteering to take care of the baby!

Elrohir gave his father an indignant glare, but then focused on the Elfling again. "I never thought Imladris would house a child again."

"Imagine my surprise," said Elrond gravely. "I was looking forward to spending the rest of my days in peace and quiet."

Lindir unexpectedly chuckled, having long seen behind Elrond's front. "Oh, you are just afraid to admit you like having a little one around, love!"

"Caught," whispered Erestor in a wicked tone, and he gave Elrond a knowing look. "You will thoroughly enjoy having him around and you know it."

Elrond pretended to mock and looked the other way, ignoring Erestor – who, of course, was right – he always was.

Thranduil opened his eyes slowly; a terrible headache tormenting him. If felt like his skull was being split into several layers. The last thing he remembered was falling into darkness after something had hit his head hard. Next, he drew in a shuddering breath, wincing when pain sliced through his chest.

"Don't move about yet. Aragorn wants you to rest for at least two more days."

That was Celeborn's voice, registered Thranduil absentmindedly. His eyes slowly came into focus and he found the elder Elf seated on the bedside. "What… are you… doing here?"

"I am looking after you," said Celeborn, finally allowing himself to believe that Thranduil would indeed make a full recovery. "Finding you at the bottom of that crater scared me. Don't do that ever again!" He couldn't help being cross with Thranduil for endangering himself in that way. "What were you thinking? Entering that building?"

"It was… a… mistake," said Thranduil slowly, still finding it hard to think rationally. "Head… hurts…"

"Close your eyes and don't talk that much," advised Celeborn, who now placed a cool, wet cloth on Thranduil's brow. "You took quite a fall. Had you been mortal you might not have survived."

"Who… got me…out?" Thranduil's eyes were half-closed, as he was unwilling to go back to sleep just yet.

"I did," said Celeborn, who suddenly felt awkward. He fervently hoped he wasn't blushing.

"You?" Thranduil's rising eyebrow stopped half-way and he flinched in pain. "Why you?"

"Because I was worried and I wanted to take you into safety myself." Celeborn moved slightly away from Thranduil, not wanting the younger Elf to read certain emotions in his eyes. "Legolas was here to visit with you. Do you remember talking to him?"

Thranduil stopped himself from nodding just in time, realizing it might worsen his headache. "I do…"

"He alarmed us, telling us something had happened to you. The two of you share a strong bond."

"It has been there… since his birth." Thranduil grew tired again and closed his eyes. "My injuries?"

"Two broken ribs, a concussion and a multitude of bruises," summarized Celeborn.

Thranduil was about to give in to sleep, when he experienced a strange sensation. His hand… Someone's fingers were tightly curled around it, holding on tight. But whose fingers… and why? Tightening his hold on the fingers, he heard Celeborn sharply suck in his breath. "Why?" he whispered, using his last energy reserves to open his eyes and stare questioningly at the silver-haired Elf.

Celeborn knew the moment of truth had arrived, but still wasn't sure what to do. Looking into Thranduil's hooded, dark-green eyes, Celeborn realized he couldn't lie to him. "Because I care for you – deeply. I was afraid I would lose you!"

Thranduil's eyes widened slightly, and he managed to ignore the pounding headache that nearly made him faint. This was too important! He had to correctly understand what Celeborn was telling him. "You…care? Deeply?" What exactly was Celeborn trying to tell him?

Celeborn moistened his lips, cleared his throat and then looked gingerly into Thranduil's clouded eyes. /Please, Elbereth, I don't want to scare him away with my admission, but I cannot lie to him!/ Celeborn drew in a deep breath and whilst releasing it, he whispered, "I love you."

Thranduil's breath caught – painfully – and he stared at Celeborn in shock. "You what?" He must have misheard!

"I love you," repeated Celeborn, this time in a louder and firmer tone. "I love you, Thranduil." The younger Elf's shocked gaze should have been amusing but it wasn't. "But you don't love me, do you?"

"I…I…" Thranduil simply didn't know what to say. He had never thought of Celeborn in that way! "Tired," he offered eventually, his eyes closing again. "La…ter…"

"Yes, we will talk later," agreed Celeborn softly. "You need to rest now. I exhausted you after Aragorn told me to make sure you rest." Celeborn still rubbed Thranduil's fingers between his. "I regret I sprung this upon you. I should have waited for a more opportune moment." But he hadn't been able to lie to Thranduil, and so the truth had been revealed.

Elrond felt relieved when they finally reached Imladris safely and immediately ordered the last remaining servants to search for any baby clothes they might still have. Celebrían had kept some items as memorabilia and they might come in handy now. He also instructed them to search for the cradle that had held Arwen and to place it in Erestor's rooms, which earned him a glare from his chief councilor. "Erestor, please… You know that you are best suited to care for this Elfling. You did a marvelous job when co-raising my children."

Glorfindel inched closer. "I will help you care for him. If you will let me, I will move my belongings to your rooms so we can be together." He blushed weakly, catching Erestor's pleased expression. "I won't part from you ever again."

Before Erestor could say a thing, Elrond issued the order to move Glorfindel's belongings to Erestor's chambers. "We need to be organized now that we are responsible for an Elfling. He may be quiet now but when he wakes the whole of Imladris will shake on its fundament!"

"Don't be that melodramatic," said Erestor, shaking his head. "He won't be teething for a long time."

Elrond had the grace to blush and gave Elrohir an apologetic look. "There was no way of calming you down. And Elladan cried the hardest."

"He ran," said Erestor, smugly, gently rocking Collofin in his arms. "He left your mother and I to sit with you."

"Ada!" Elrohir shook his head in mock annoyance. "You disappoint me!"

"Just wait until Collofin starts teething," said Elrond determinedly. "Then you will run too!" Gathering his riding cloak close, he turned away from them and entered the Last Homely House, leaving the five remaining Elves to their giggles and chuckling.

Erestor gently placed Collofin in his cradle and then sat down, nodding gratefully at Glorfindel who had pulled a chair close for him. "I never thought I would care for an Elfling ever again."

"Elrond is right, you know. You *did* a good job co-raising the twins and Arwen." Now that he thought about it, he realized how heavy Erestor's work load had been back then. As Elrond's Captain, Glorfindel had taught all three children how to ride and wield a sword, but he had only entered the picture once Elrond's offspring had neared majority. He had occasionally sat with them when they had been Elflings, but Celebrían and Erestor had done most of the work during the children's formative years.

"Erestor, love, you don't really seem to mind having him here." Erestor's gaze was trained on the Elfling, who had woken up and was trying to take in his surroundings. "You didn't fight Elrond's order to care for this little one very hard."

Erestor moistened his lips and then looked at Glorfindel. "I am ready to raise Collofin, but are you? Are we? As a couple? Did we really deal with all the issues between us?"

Glorfindel swallowed hard, hearing the real question behind Erestor's words. His lover was asking him to stand beside him and support him – unconditionally. "We will do this together, melethen." Erestor's soft expression made his heart skip a beat and acting on impulse, he leaned in closer and pressed a possessive kiss on his beloved's luscious lips.

They would raise Collofin together and hopefully create a bond with the foundling that would help him deal with life's problems when he grew older.

Celeborn had fallen asleep in his chair, which he had placed close to Thranduil's bed. He had wanted to be ready to help once the younger Elf woke up, but he had fallen asleep himself whilst keeping his vigil. Finding Thranduil motionless on the bottom of that crater had shocked him, and sleep was the best way to recuperate. Therefore he was unaware of the thoughtful, emerald eyes that studied him.

Celeborn's declaration of love had stunned Thranduil, who had never expected it. As far as he was concerned they had been best friends in Doriath, but he had married Remmen whilst Celeborn had found a lovely wife in Galadriel. So why had Celeborn revealed having these feelings for him?

/Maybe because Galadriel sailed west and you finally stopped mourning Remmen's passing? Maybe because he instinctively knows you are ready to commit again?/ supplied a small voice in the back of his head.

A part of him couldn't believe what Celeborn had told him. Yes, they had been best friends once, and there had always been an easy understanding between them, but both of them had always known their duty was first to their realms. But Fuinglad no longer needed a King and Lothlórien was also quickly emptying. Their realms were realms no more and no longer needed ruling. They could finally be just themselves.

A part of that concept frightened him. He had been Fuinglad's ruler for so long that he wondered if he could simply be Thranduil instead. His musings however, were cut short when Celeborn moved about, his blue eyes filling with awareness. His suitor was waking up, and Thranduil wasn't certain how to proceed where Celeborn was concerned.

Celeborn blinked once, slowly realizing his charge was awake. Pushing aside his questions and uncertainties, he concentrated on the younger Elf, relieved to find the pupils clear and focused. "How do you fare, my friend?" Would Thranduil bring up his admission or pretend the words had never been uttered?

"I am…confused," said Thranduil, thoughtfully. "I find it hard to believe that what you said is true."

Celeborn winced; this answered the question whether Thranduil was going to bring up the matter of his admission or not. "It is the truth."

"Why tell me now? Or have these feelings awoken only now?" Thranduil carefully pushed himself into a sitting position and allowed Celeborn to assist him when the elder Elf moved to help. "I don't understand. When did this start, then?"

Celeborn averted his eyes and stared at the floor as he felt unable to face Thranduil right now. "I don't know when it started. I always cared for you and when we lived in Doriath you were my best friend."

"Were you already attracted to me back then?" Thranduil studied Celeborn closely, sensing how hard this was on the elder Elf and he realized Celeborn hadn't wanted to tell him in the first place.

"I honestly don't know," replied Celeborn, "I always felt *something* for you. But I was destined to marry Galadriel and you fell in love with Remmen. It was obvious that we weren't meant to be together."

"What has changed? What caused your feelings to reappear?" Thranduil was experiencing an emotional turmoil himself, as he tried to sort out his own feelings whilst listening to his old friend.

"The night of the feast… I saw Éomer and you leave early and I followed." Celeborn heard Thranduil's surprised gasp and briefly looked at him, shrugging apologetically. "I was worried he might be an inattentive lover and you looked so fragile. I merely wanted to protect you."

"You felt jealous," realized Thranduil suddenly. "You became jealous, seeing us leave together."

"Yes," said Celeborn, not even bothering to deny the truth. "I wanted you for myself, but I also realized Éomer could give you something I no longer can. His lust for you burned brightly and helped you find your way. I couldn't step in there and drag you away from him. It was obvious those three nights were meant to be and you emerged so much stronger."

"But Éomer left." Thranduil carefully considered everything Celeborn had told him. "What did you hope to achieve with your admission last night?"

"Not much," said Celeborn, calmly. "You asked why I rescued you myself and I found that I couldn't lie to you. I had to speak the truth."

"So you have had feelings for me for a long time?" summarized Thranduil, who was slowly reaching a decision of his own.

"Yes, I have. And I doubt they will go away again even if you reject my love. I have felt like this for so long that it has become a part of me. Galadriel, my dear wife, knew my heart longed for you and she set it free before she sailed for Valinor. But little good will it do me as you don't love me in return."

"And how do you know that?" Thranduil frowned, slowly beginning to understand that Celeborn thought his love was unrequited. "Why did you reach that conclusion?"

"Because I can see it in your eyes." Celeborn smiled ruefully. "And you whispered no words of love back to me."

"Did you ever consider you took me by surprise?" Thranduil shook his head at Celeborn's conclusions. "I was concussed—"

"You *are* still concussed."

"Don't interrupt me!" Impatiently, Thranduil waved Celeborn's remark away. "I was… indisposed… when you told me and you expect me to blurt out words of undying love?"

"Wishful thinking." Celeborn gave Thranduil a pleading look. "I understand that this is a shock and I would never have told you—"

"Told me what?" asked Thranduil teasingly.

"You are going to make me repeat it?" Celeborn sighed in surrender. "I love you."

"Again."

Celeborn winced. "I love you."

"Harder this time."

Celeborn's brow furrowed. "I love you," he said in a slightly louder voice. "Why are you doing this to me? Why prolong my suffering?"

"Because I like hearing you say it." Thranduil gave the elder Elf a wicked grin. "Come a bit closer, Celeborn. You are too far away."

Celeborn gingerly exchanged his chair for the bedside. He didn't know what to make of Thranduil's odd behavior. Was the concussion still affecting Thranduil? That must be it! Why else… Those thoughts quickly fled, as Thranduil's fingertips came to rest against his bottom lip. Questioningly looking at the younger Elf, Celeborn forced himself to wait for whatever was going to happen next.

"You shouldn't draw conclusions without consulting the other participant in this play." Thranduil teasingly caressed Celeborn's bottom lip. "I really like hearing you say it."

"What? That I love you?" Puzzled, Celeborn frowned. "What does this mean?" Thranduil was utterly confusing him!

"It means - you old fool - that you drew the wrong conclusion." Thranduil smiled smugly. "I am agreeable to this."

Celeborn's heart skipped a beat. "You are?"

Thranduil's smug grin broadened. "Indeed I am… Now would you kindly kiss me? We should find out if we are compatible in that way." The stunned expression in Celeborn's eyes amused him to no end. "As you aren't moving, I will have to take the lead." He rested one hand at the nape of Celeborn's neck, whilst he used the other to draw the elder Elf closer to him. Slowly touching his lips to Celeborn's, he maintained eye contact, wanting to see the exact moment the truth would sink in with the silver-haired Elf.

Being kissed on the lips by Thranduil was something Celeborn had never expected and he gasped softly, trying to steady his breathing, which had quickened at the intimate contact. "What does this mean?"

"It means I have feelings for you too," said Thranduil calmly. "I don't know what their exact nature is, but I am more than willing to find it if you are."

"It is my greatest wish!" Celeborn's shock made way for joy now that his love had been accepted. He would have loved to talk for many hours with Thranduil, but he could tell the conversation was draining the other Elf. "I did it again… I exhausted you!"

"I have the feeling you will exhaust me countless times in our future together. Thranduil chuckled softly.

Not used to this sort of innuendo coming from Thranduil, Celeborn's face grew flustered. "Behave. You are in the House of Healing and someone can enter at any given moment."

"I have never been known to behave myself in the past… Why should I start now?" Thranduil slid his hand in between Celeborn's fingers and smiled tiredly. "It seems… I am… sleepy… again."

"You are still recovering… meleth." That last word left Celeborn's lips somewhat gingerly, but he hoped that the expression in his eyes told Thranduil how much he loved the other Elf. This was so new! So unexpected! "I don't know yet how to react to you now… now that everything has changed."

"We will find… out in time…" mumbled Thranduil, already falling asleep. "Don't… worry too… much…" Slipping into reverie, his hold on Celeborn's hand loosened.

"I never thought you would accept me," whispered Celeborn, still trying to accept his fears hadn't come true. Tenderly rubbing the skin of Thranduil's hand with his fingertips, he settled down for a long wait, unwilling to miss the exact moment Thranduil woke up again.

"Yes, enter." Erestor was in the process of unbraiding his hair when Lindir entered his rooms, carrying a small pile of baby clothes and diapers. "You found something. Good!" Walking toward his friend, his dark, loose hair danced against the small of back and the long, raven strands nicely framed his face, giving his chocolate brown eyes an even darker expression.

Lindir handed Erestor the clothes and napkins and then walked over to the cradle. "He looks… clean."

"I gave him a bath," explained Erestor, who was now looking through the selection of baby clothes Lindir had brought. "These will do."

Lindir ran a hand along Collofin's face, bestowing a gentle caress on the Elfling. "Maybe it is a good thing that he is this young. Hopefully he won't remember his parents were killed."

"He is only a few days old," said Erestor, pulling a midnight blue morning robe over the nightshirt he was wearing. "He won't remember that fateful day."

"Erestor? I have got milk!" Triumphant, Elrohir entered the room, waving a bottle filled with lukewarm milk.

"Excellent," said Erestor, smiling at the half-Elf. Looking in the cradle, he found that Collofin's eyes had opened and were now curiously examining his new surroundings. Erestor carefully lifted the Elfling and cradled him against his chest. "Are you hungry, pen-neth?"

Collofin squirmed in Erestor's arms, and the advisor quickly sat down. "Elrohir, hand me that bottle." Settling down comfortably, he encouraged Collofin to start drinking, which the baby promptly did, trying to grab hold of the bottle with his tiny, chubby fingers. "Yes, you are very hungry," muttered Erestor absentmindedly, unaware of the amused looks Lindir and Elrohir exchanged.

"Maybe we should leave them alone," whispered Elrohir, "Give mother and son some privacy."

"I heard that," scowled Erestor. Mentally, he sighed, knowing only too well it would be a while before the whole of Imladris – and its inhabitants would settle down and return to normalcy. Whatever that was.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 14

"Glorfindel, just change that diaper – now!" Erestor sighed, exasperated, seeing Glorfindel squeeze his nose shut so the unpleasant smell pouring from Collofin's spoiled diapers wouldn't invade his nostrils. "Don't be such a baby!"

"I am not a baby!" Disgusted with the result that Collofin had managed to produce, Glorfindel quickly disposed of it. His features contorted when Erestor handed him a wet wash cloth to wipe the Elfling's buttocks. "And why am I the one doing this?"

"You got off easy with Arwen and the twins," said Erestor, smiling sweetly. "Now you will pull your weight with Collofin. Remember, you assured me that we were in this together."

Glorfindel sighed in surrender. "But the smell!"

"You will get used to it," said Erestor, as he handed Glorfindel a clean diaper.

"I doubt it." Glorfindel had just cleaned the baby's buttocks and was about to slip the clean diaper into place when…

Erestor burst out laughing, and hugged his waist in mirth, trying to contain his amusement, but utterly failing. "Oh, that's…" Words failed him, and he leaned heavily against the wall for support, as his knees were buckling with laughter.

Collofin had chosen that exact moment to pee and the young one's aim was truly perfect, hitting bull's eyes by wetting Glorfindel's tunic.

"This is not funny!" Glorfindel clung to his composure, simply pretending none of this was happening. Thankfully, Collofin had finished relieving himself and now cooed happily at Glorfindel. Although his arms were way too short, he tried to reach for the golden strands of hair, which always seemed to captivate him. "You are trouble, pen-neth."

Erestor had finally caught his breath again, and coughed to clear the last remnants of laughter from his throat. "I am so glad he did that to you and not to me!"

"He will get you too. Don't worry about that." Glorfindel cleaned the Elfling again and quickly fastened the diaper in place. "He won't succeed in doing that a second time to me!"

Erestor managed to restore his calm appearance, but privately he was still chuckling. Life would never be the same again with such a mischievous Elfling around.

Another mischievous Elfling in Minas Tirith was doing his best to put knots in Legolas' hair. Legolas suffered in silence, allowing Remmen to twist and tug at the strands, hoping the child would tire eventually.

"Aye, I daresay you need help!" Gimli entered the small hall, in which Legolas and Remmen had found a comfortable spot near the fire place. Arwen was seated near them, sewing and humming softly. "And you, my Lady, have never looked fairer!" He bowed slightly and gave her a wink, at which Arwen giggled softly.

"Flattery will get you anywhere," said Arwen, whose gaze came to rest on Remmen. She had played with the Elfling during the morning, giving Legolas a chance to catch up on the sleep he had been missing, and her heart had filled with hope, instinctively knowing she would have a son of her own one day in the future.

Gimli smiled at her, and then headed for Legolas, who winced when Remmen tugged particularly hard. "Would you hand him to me? I have hair in surplus for him to play with." He sat down beside Legolas and expectantly opened his arms, eager to receive Remmen into them.

Legolas gave the Dwarf a grateful smile and then placed his son into the strong arms. It was a good thing that Remmen had taken a liking to Gimli, who allowed the baby's inquisitive fingers to explore his beard.

Gimli could have sailed with Galadriel, who had for always stolen his heart, but he had announced he couldn't possibly part from Legolas and Remmen yet. Legolas was a trusted companion and one of his closest friends, and seeing this miniature of his friend touched him deeply. He wanted to contribute to Remmen becoming a wise, just, and friendly Elf, much like his father was. "Where is Haldir today?"

"He is accompanying Aragorn on today's patrols." Haldir had gradually taken on more duties and was quickly becoming Aragorn's second in command. The only drawback was that Legolas frequently missed having his husband close. "He will return tonight."

Gimli heard the tone of sorrow and regret in Legolas' voice, and understood his friend, but Haldir's absence gave him a chance to spend more time with the Elfling. Remmen's little fingers had stilled; tightly wrapped in his beard. "He is falling asleep."

Legolas sighed in relief. "He has been remarkably active."

"He is wearing you down," said Arwen softly. "Haldir needs to spend more time here and less at my husband's side. I will talk to Estel about this." Legolas yawned and Arwen wondered if her future son would equally exhaust her. In a way, helping Legolas raise Remmen would help her be a better mother to her future son. "Why don't you leave Remmen with us for the rest of the day? Walk in the gardens, take a long bath, or sleep!"

"That does sound tempting," whispered Legolas, "I could visit with my father." Although he had visited Thranduil yesterday, it would be nice to spend more time with him. That was, if Celeborn agreed to stop fussing over Thranduil for the duration of his visit. Ever since Thranduil had taken that fall, Celeborn had stopped hiding his feelings. His father had felt it was his duty to enlighten him, and had been surprised when Legolas had told him he already suspected as much. He had seen the relief in Thranduil's eyes – had his father really expected him to oppose their relationship? Maybe. He could be extremely protective of his father and Thranduil knew that.

"I will collect Remmen before dinner." Legolas placed a parental kiss on Remmen's brow and then rose from the floor. "Thank you for looking after him."

Arwen placed the embroidery she was working on aside, rose from the chair and joined Gimli and Remmen on the rug, smiling warmly at the Dwarf and Elfling. "We will enjoy our time with Remmen. Now go."

Legolas cast one last look over his shoulder at his son to make sure Remmen was comfortable and enjoying himself and just caught Gimli's surprised expression when possessive fingers tugged at his beard. Yes, they would be just fine and it was about time he talked to his father about Celeborn in depth.

"A little higher… A bit harder… Yes, that's the spot…. Good…" Purr.

Legolas blushed and halted in the doorway. His father's words – and the tone of his voice – had stopped him. That purr had made him come to a standstill before entering Thranduil's rooms. Aragorn had allowed Celeborn to take their patient back to his rooms, but the healer still checked on his charge regularly.

"Very good… You have talented hands… A bit harder… Yesssss!" More purring.

Legolas was about to turn around and leave when his father called out his name.

"Legolas, my son, please visit your old father!"

Drawing in a deep breath, as Legolas wasn't certain what scene he would happen upon, he closed his eyes and stepped into the room.

"Why are your eyes closed?" Thranduil frowned at Legolas, but then his gaze shifted back to Celeborn, giving his new lover an adoring smile. "Thanks for the massage." His concussion limited his movement and his muscles had cramped up due to the fact that he had been confined to bed. Celeborn had valiantly offered to relieve some of the tension situated in his neck and shoulders and Thranduil had of course accepted. Looking at his son now, Thranduil grinned as he realized what Legolas had imagined they were doing.

Legolas' eyes opened abruptly, finding his father's torso naked, but at least Thranduil was wearing breeches. Celeborn sat behind his father and was massaging his shoulders. Legolas shook his head, and giggled. "You don't want to know what I was thinking!"

Celeborn flushed a nice shade of red, whilst Thranduil burst out laughing. "Oh, Legolas! I would lock the door if Celeborn and I were to engage in *that* sort of activity."

"Would you?" Legolas advanced on them and sat down in a comfortable chair near his father's bed.

Celeborn coughed in order to clear his throat and then rose from the bed. He covered Thranduil's upper body with a warm blanket and helped his lover to lean back into the pillows, which were positioned against the head board of the bed. "Are you comfortable?"

"I would be more comfortable if you had remained in bed with me, meleth-nîn."

Amused, Legolas found that Celeborn's flush was still deepening. "You had better grow used to his teasing, my friend."

"I never expected him to act in this manner," admitted Celeborn, who seated himself near the fire place, putting some distance between Thranduil and he. Thranduil had surprised him in more ways than once since he had declared his love to the golden-haired Elf. Although they hadn't gone any further than sharing that first kiss, Thranduil was constantly teasing him, almost luring him into deepening their intimacy. But Celeborn wanted to take this slow and wait until Thranduil had made a full recovery. Or else he would feel like he was taking advantage of the injured, younger Elf.

"Why didn't you bring Remmen with you?" asked Thranduil, studying Legolas and easily identifying the exhaustion in the other's eyes. "Celeborn and I would love to watch him for you."

"I left him with Gimli and Arwen. He's in the best hands, Ada."

"And where is that husband of yours?" Thranduil's brow furrowed. "He cannot leave you alone to look after Remmen. I will have a word with him the next time we meet."

Legolas cringed. "Arwen plans on doing exactly the same thing. But honestly, Ada, Haldir cannot help it. Aragorn needs someone experienced at his side now that he's rebuilding his kingdom."

"Remmen needs his father more… You need your husband *more* than Aragorn a second in command!" Thranduil shook his head in disapproval. "Haldir has no idea what he's missing out on."

"He knows," whispered Legolas softly. "And it's not like I don't see him at all. He is just away during the day for some hours. He always returns to me in the evening. He takes good care of me."

Thranduil's eyes narrowed. "What's behind this?"

"He misses Rúmil and Orophin," explained Legolas, "He is so used to caring for them…" Surprised at hearing Celeborn sigh deeply, his gaze sought out the elder Elf, and realization finally settled in. "You must miss them too."

"I do. The three of them were like sons to me, and now two of them have left me."

Thranduil's eyes filled with sorrow and understanding. "The hardest thing I ever did was allowing Legolas to join the Fellowship. I was afraid the quest would demand his life and I thank the Valar that they kept him safe." Celeborn's eyes revealed gratitude at hearing those words and Thranduil added, "May you find comfort in the fact that you will be reunited with them eventually. They are safe in Valinor and when we will eventually sail, you will hold them in your arms again."

A single tear escaped Celeborn's eyes and he quickly wiped it away. "You are right. I find comfort in that thought." 

"And in the meantime, you have me to distract and occupy you," purred Thranduil, determined to do away with his lover's melancholy. "Now seems a good time for that sponge bath you promised me."

Legolas blushed and cleared his throat. "In that case I shall take my leave." He doubted his father would behave during said sponge bath and had no desire to find out what his father's hidden agenda was. "I will visit with you again tomorrow, Ada."

"And bring Remmen, would you? I would love to spend more time with my grand son." Thranduil briefly placed his hand on Legolas' arm as his son leaned in closer to hug him. "I promise to behave when Remmen is close."

"You had better!" said Legolas, amused. Taking a step away from his father's bed, he exchanged a knowing glance with Celeborn. /I hope you have enough stamina, my Lord, for my father will exhaust you./

Celeborn wondered about the look Legolas was giving him, wishing he could read the younger Elf's mind. But he couldn't and had to settle for a courteous nod.

Legolas smiled, and left them alone, wondering how long it would take his father to wind Celeborn around his little finger utterly.

"Lower… I don't have anything you haven't seen before, mighty Lord of the Golden Wood," said Thranduil teasingly, knowing the bantering would keep Celeborn from brooding. The sadness at having lost Galadriel and his foster sons was always present in Celeborn's eyes and Thranduil was doing his best to distract his new lover.

Celeborn sighed deeply and then moved the sponge beneath Thranduil's waist line to wash the younger Elf's groin area. "Why did I ever agree to this?"

"Because you love me," said Thranduil smugly, "So you want to take care of me." A soft growl, followed by an almost feline purr escaped him when Celeborn's fingers moved along his member, which was definitely interested in this turn of events. As the hardening flesh slowly rose to attention, Thranduil seductively licked his lips. "Oh, melethen, I like that very much."

"I am sure you do. Now behave! I am merely cleaning you up and—" Thranduil took him completely by surprise, claiming his lips in a passionate kiss whilst guiding his hand back onto the rising flesh. Eyes wide, he stared into Thranduil's emerald eyes and felt stunned, seeing the love, acceptance and need in them. Thranduil was the most sensual, charming and bewitching Elf he had ever met. Not even Galadriel had touched the core of his being in this manner!

Unable to pull his hand away, he stroked lazily, savoring the needy and feverish moans that left Thranduil's lips. Accepting this was really going to happen, he knelt on the bedside, and placed one hand at the column of Thranduil's neck. He kissed him hard – bruising the soft lips. Establishing dominion over the younger Elf, his strokes now sped up, and he timed his kisses with the delightful manipulation of the other's enflamed flesh.

Thranduil surrendered to Celeborn's passion, allowing the other to set their pace. Moaning hungrily into the silver-haired Elf's mouth, he began to thrust against his lover's hand.

Celeborn growled low in this throat, and ignored Thranduil's mews of disappointment when he pulled back, breaking their kiss. Instead, his lips moved lower, licking his way down Thranduil's neck and nipping just beneath the ear. Warm cream suddenly erupted from the head of Thranduil's shaft and dripped from his fingers, causing Celeborn to stop the intimate ministration. "You are most wicked."

"Good," panted Thranduil softly, "I have a reputation to uphold."

But the emerald eyes told Celeborn differently. Thranduil was doing this for a reason. "Thank you." Knowing he had found a new love helped him deal with the temporary loss of his loved ones.

Thranduil returned Celeborn's smile and then added wickedly, "Now you have to clean me up – again, meleth-nîn."

"I will gladly do so," whispered Celeborn, pressing one more kiss on Thranduil's swollen lips. "And you will have to behave for once."

"I might be able to do that just for this one time – feeling satiated and content." Thranduil raised his hand, gently moved his fingertips over Celeborn's lips and mumbled, "I love you too."

"I know you do, and I thank you for this gift, my dearest heart."

Haldir entered their private chambers with a deep frown on his brow. "What is this? Haldir interrogation day?"

Legolas, who had just bathed Remmen, looked up. "What did you say, love?"

Haldir removed his weapons and boots, draped his riding cloak over a chair and advanced on his husband and son. He wrapped his arms around Legolas' waist and rested his chin on the other Elf's shoulder. "Maybe you can explain this to me. Upon our return, Arwen cornered us, demanding I spend more time with you and she chided Aragorn for keeping me away from you. Next, Celeborn approaches me on my way over here and demands to know what is so important that I am not at your side."

Legolas leaned back against Haldir and finished dressing Remmen. "I told them not to do that. But they are worried."

"Worried? About you?" Still frowning, Haldir stepped in front of Legolas, studying him. "You do look tired. Maybe they are right and I need to spend more time with you and Remmen. It isn't fair for you to do all the work."

"You already get up each night when Remmen cries." Haldir didn't allow him to leave their bed at night when Remmen was upset or cried, demanding he got as much sleep as possible. Also, Haldir took care of Remmen first thing in the morning.

"But still… You look tired – drained…" Haldir gave his beloved a thoughtful glance. In the end, he made his decision and gathered Remmen into his arms. "Stay here," he told Legolas.

"Where are you going with Remmen?"

"Come with me then, if you must." Haldir took hold of Legolas' hand and guided his love out of the room and into the corridor.

They walked for some minutes, until his surroundings became very familiar to Legolas. "Are we visiting my father?"

"Just wait and see." Haldir came to a halt in front of the door to Thranduil's rooms and knocked once. "Are you decent, Ada?"

"Just which father are you addressing, pen-neth?" came Celeborn's voice, clearly amused.

"Which ever father is decent!" teased Haldir in return.

"Come inside, my son," said Celeborn, opening the door to let them in. But Haldir seemed to have different plans and Remmen was carefully placed in his arms. "Oh," he whispered, delighted at finally having the Elfling in his arms. "Hello there, Remmen."

Remmen's bright eyes studied Celeborn and he seemed to like what he was seeing, giggling softly.

"Haldir, what are you doing?" Legolas tried to reach for Remmen, but his husband stopped him. "You need rest. A good night's sleep without interruptions and crying. Celeborn offered to help and he's more than capable of looking after an Elfling for a night."

"Oh, yes!" Celeborn hugged Remmen close to his chest. "Thranduil and I would love to look after him!"

Thranduil, who wondered what the commotion was all about, had left the bed and slowly made his way over to the doorway. "Ah, Legolas, did you finally decide to let me spend more time with my grandson? Remmen, you are more than welcome here."

The moment Remmen caught sight of Thranduil, he raised his arms, extended them and reached for the golden-haired Elf, who resembled his own father so closely. Chirping happily, his tiny fingers managed to grab hold of Thranduil's robes.

"I do think we are already forming a bond, aren't we, pen-neth?" Thranduil, who had been leaning against the wall, now leaned against Celeborn instead, who had wrapped an arm around his waist. "Would you give him to me, melethen?" His breath caught when Celeborn placed Remmen in his arms.

Celeborn gave Legolas a reassuring smile, indicating that Remmen was well cared for and then concentrated on Thranduil again, steering his lover back toward the bed. "You shouldn't be up and about yet."

"Come with me, Legolas. Remmen is in the best hands." Haldir exchanged a look with his beloved, who looked slightly stunned. "You don't mind me asking Celeborn and Thranduil to look after Remmen? They love taking care of him and we can have a night of peace and quiet."

"No, you are right," said Legolas thoughtfully. "I just didn't want to burden them with—"

Haldir silenced Legolas with a deep kiss. "Watching Remmen is no burden to them. On the contrary, they love having him close."

Legolas folded one arm around Haldir's waist and pulled him close. "It is a pity we are standing in a corridor."

"Having naughty thoughts, my love?" Haldir loved seeing the spark of desire in Legolas' azure eyes. Since Remmen's birth their intimate moments had been sparse. "You are right. We should make good use of tonight."

"In that case we won't get much rest."

"Maybe Aragorn and Arwen will agree to watch over Remmen tomorrow night then, when we finally catch up on our sleep." Haldir claimed Legolas' lips once more, thoroughly looking forward to making love tonight.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 15

Five years later

"Remmen grows up so quickly," said Thranduil, sighing. His grandson had long taken his first few steps and if he wasn't walking, he was crawling into places he wasn't supposed to go. Minding the Elfling had become an exhausting task.

Legolas smiled warmly. Celeborn and his father had settled in Eryn Lasgalen some time ago, but they still visited frequently. "I am glad you came to Ithilien to spend time with us, Ada. I have missed having you close."

Thranduil pulled Remmen onto his lap, and the Elfling was delighted when the elder Elf mimicked the movements of a horse, rocking him hard. Applauding Thranduil, he told his grand father to rock him harder. Thranduil cherished these moments with his son and grandson. Sometimes he wished Celeborn and he had settled in Ithilien as well, but their hearts had directed them to Eryn Lasgalen instead.

"Are you still happy with Celeborn?" Legolas served his father some hot herbal tea and watched the emerald eyes closely.

"Yes, I am very happy."

"But there is something that troubles you," said Legolas, easily reading his father's face like an open book.

"Celeborn told me he would love to become a father again. He would love to have another child."

Legolas shook his head in concern. "Don't do it, Ada." He still vividly recalled his father's admission that he had died when giving birth to him. "I cannot lose you in such a way."

"We aren't arguing about it," clarified Thranduil, tickling Remmen, who now desperately tried to get away from the teasing hands. "But I can read the desire in his eyes."

"Would it help if Remmen stayed with you for part of the year?"

"I don't think so," said Thranduil, worried. "I want to give him a child, but…"

"You cannot take the risk that you might die during child birth. Mithrandir is no longer close to pull you back."

"I know that." Thranduil was growing desperate for a change in subject, so he asked, "And where is Haldir?"

"Walking the gardens with Celeborn." Who knew, maybe they were having a similar discussion.

"Are Legolas and you considering having another child?" asked Celeborn, who had settled down on the bench beside Haldir. At times like these he wished Rúmil and Orophin were still present. He missed them. He missed having a large family.

"We haven't discussed that yet. Remmen keeps us extremely busy, in case you hadn't noticed."

"Oh, I noticed." Upon his arrival, he had found Haldir lecturing Remmen, who had climbed a tree a bit too tall for his father's liking. "You were trouble too, Haldir."

"Personally I think Remmen inherited a lot of character traits from his grandfather. Thranduil must keep you busy too."

"But in a good way." Celeborn smiled fondly, recalling waking up in Thranduil's arms this very morning. "We are happy, Haldir. I never thought we would work out this well. I was always worried he would reject me in the end. We were practically strangers when we met again in Minas Tirith. We skipped becoming best friends again and became lovers instead."

"How long will Thranduil and you stay this time?"

"A few weeks. He wants to spend time with Legolas and I must confess I am looking forward to playing with Remmen."

"You do know you are always welcome here, don't you?"

"I do, Haldir, but you must understand… Thranduil always loved his lands and by staying there he follows the song of his heart." Now that the dark forces had been destroyed, the former Mirkwood had blossomed with green and new animal life. It was paradise to them. The only thing that was lacking was an addition to their family.

"What troubles you, Ada?"

"It is nothing," said Celeborn, smiling to reassure Haldir. "Nothing at all."

Meanwhile, in Imladris, Collofin was causing no trouble at all. He was a silent child, content to be held and rocked. The boy was so quiet that at times Glorfindel and Elrohir tried to get him into trouble, but Collofin would simply stare at them with his big, blue eyes and give them an innocent and exasperated look.

"Collofin?" Erestor found the Elfling seated on the window sill in his study, and again he wondered why this was Collofin's favorite spot. "Why are you here all alone?" He sat down beside Collofin and gathered the tiny hands in his. "Why are you always this sad, pen-neth?"

Collofin looked at Erestor, sighed, and snuggled up to the chief advisor, who was the closest thing he had to a mother. "Don't know."

Erestor sighed deeply, wrapped his arms around Collofin and pulled him onto his lap. "Shall I ask Glorfindel to take you for a ride on Asfaloth later today?" Although Collofin was still too young to ride by himself, the Elfling loved it when Glorfindel pulled him into the saddle to ride Asfaloth.

"I would like that," said Collofin politely. He wrapped his arms around Erestor's neck and stared into the chocolate brown eyes. "I feel alone, Ada."

The words broke Erestor's heart, even though he had heard them many times before. Ever since Collofin had begun to talk, the Elfling had told them he was lonely. Though he couldn't figure out why, with so many Elves that cared for him. Pulling Collofin as close as possible, he petted the golden hair, highlighted with red. "I am so sorry, pen-neth. I wish I could love you even more."

Collofin slightly pulled away so he could establish eye contact with Erestor. "I know you love me, Ada… and Ada Glorfindel loves me too." He didn't want them to think they didn't love him enough. That wasn't it. He longed for something else, something which he couldn't label. It felt like half of his soul was missing. "Love you too, Ada."

Magolion cleared his throat to announce his arrival. Upon seeing Collofin's distressed state, he offered, "I can come back later."

"No, that won't be necessary," said Erestor, signaling for his brother to enter. Much had changed between them during these last five years. Understanding had blossomed between them and they had finally managed to establish a brotherly relationship. "I am certain Collofin will enjoy visiting with the animals in the woods, won't you?"

One of the things that really improved the Elfling's mood was when he played with the squirrels, rabbits, deer and foxes, which housed in the neighboring forests. It was the one time Erestor felt truly grateful for his ability to communicate with animals.

"Yes, I want that," said Collofin in a timid voice, reluctantly releasing Erestor from his tight hold. But the next moment he grabbed hold of Erestor's right hand, refusing to let go again. "Want you close!"

"But of course, pen-neth." Erestor fought the tears that threatened to leave his eyes. No matter how much they loved and pampered Collofin, the boy's infinite sadness never went away.

"I wonder why he constantly feels sad and alone," whispered Magolion, who was seated on the forest ground beside Erestor. They kept a close eye on Collofin, who was petting a rabbit's long ears. "I cannot figure it out. Do you think it has something to do with… with his parents?"

They had decided against telling Collofin just yet about his parents. The boy knew Erestor and Glorfindel weren't his real parents, as they were both males, but he had never asked them to explain. Elrond had then decided they would wait for Collofin to come to them with his questions. In the meantime, they would simply love Collofin and give him the best possible home.

Erestor shook his head, whilst asking one of the squirrels to jump onto Collofin's head. The tiny animal slid down the golden strands and caused the Elfling to burst out into giggling. "He laughs too little."

"But why?"

"I don't know, Magolion. I honestly don't know." Erestor had pulled up his legs wrapped his arms around them and now rested his chin on top of his knees. His long, crimson robes were partly fanned over the forest ground. Leaves had tangled themselves in his long hair, and two butterflies had temporary found a home in the dark strands.

Magolion briefly looked away from Collofin and studied his brother instead. With each passing day more of the Istar heritage showed in his brother. At times, he vowed he saw tiny flames in the depths of Erestor's irises. When they had returned to Imladris, Erestor and he had begun to spend time in each other's company and he had been surprised to learn how easy it was to love Erestor as a brother. In a way, he wasn't surprised to learn that Collofin loved Erestor and Glorfindel best. Now that the two Elves had worked out their problems, they practically radiated love and warmth.

"Ada, Ada, look!" Collofin cradled something against his chest as he cautiously walked toward Erestor. "Baby rabbit." Carefully he lowered one arm to let Erestor and Magolion look at the tiny animal. "He's so soft."

For one tiny moment joy and happiness radiated from his eyes, but Erestor knew sadness would shortly replace it. "Yes, very lovely." Looking behind Collofin, he found the baby's mother sitting close, watching Collofin carry her baby. /Thank you,/ he sent, grateful that this moment had briefly put a smile on Collofin's face.

44 years later

"You are still one year short of your majority, Remmen," said Legolas in an accepting tone. "You have grown up so fast." Father and son were seated opposite each other, looking into one another's eyes. "You have grown in to a fine, young Elf."

Remmen's eyes shone with pride. "Thank you, Ada." He adored his parents and the praise coming from Legolas meant the world to him. "Have you already decided where you want me to study this last year?" It was custom to send the youngsters away for one year to learn more of the outside world. "Eryn Lasgalen, perhaps?"

Legolas smiled warmly. "Yes, you will spend the next year with your grandfather. I assume you are agreeable to this?"

"I am," said Remmen with a sparkling smile. He was extremely fond of Thranduil and he would love to see his grandfather again. It had been ten years since he had last seen Thranduil and Celeborn.

"There is something else…" muttered Legolas softly. "There is one more who will join you there. You won't be the only 'Elfling' there." Legolas smiled, using that word. He couldn't really call his son an Elfling any more. Remmen had grown up and possessed the body of a warrior and was wise for his years.

Remmen raised an eyebrow inquisitively, and Legolas explained, "Collofin, Erestor's adopted son will also spend his last year before reaching majority in Eryn Lasgalen. You will study together and reach majority in the same month. It will be good for you to have someone of your own age close."

Remmen was pleasantly surprised to hear this news. "I am looking forward to meeting Collofin." He had heard of the foundling that Erestor and Glorfindel had taken in, but had never met the Elf. "When will I leave, Ada?"

"Next month," announced Legolas, feeling sad and lonely now that his son was about to leave the safety of his home. He just didn't want Remmen to leave, but he couldn't stop this from happening. Remmen was about to become an adult and needed to spread his wings.

Legolas sat in the gardens, admiring the silver stars and trying to chase away his feelings of abandonment – which were completely irrational, but they still tormented him. In these last few decades Remmen had constantly been close, and letting his son stand on his own two feet frightened him.

He was therefore distracted and unfocused when Thranduil's thoughts entered his mind, as he had never expected his father to contact him. It took him a few moments to register the other's presence, but when he did, his eyes widened; his father was panicking! /Ada, what is amiss?/ Unable to control his instincts, he jumped up from the bench and stared at the heavens in a futile attempt to bridge the distance between his father and himself.

/I have done something utterly foolish,/ came Thranduil's sighing response.

/What did you do?/ Legolas trembled and wondered what sort of foolish thing his father had done.

/I am with child, Legolas./ Thranduil cringed, knowing his son wouldn't approve of his pregnancy.

/Ada!/ Legolas drew in a deep breath/ /Why? You died and almost stayed in the Halls of Waiting when you had me! What if things go amiss this time as well? Who will pull you back? I don't want to lose you!/

In Eryn Lasgalen Thranduil released a deep, tormented sigh. He had wanted to contact Legolas earlier, but knew he had to make absolutely certain he was with child before startling his son. When Celeborn had left in the morning to train with their guards, he had watched his mirror image close, and had realized a tiny distension was showing already. He *was* pregnant; probably three or four months already. Sensing Legolas' worry increase, he quickly addressed his son. /Maybe the birth will go smoothly this time. We don't know for certain that there will be complications./ In reality he was extremely worried, but he had to radiate calm toward his son.

/I sense your worry,/ sent Legolas, shaking his head in disbelief. /You are worried complications will arise./

Realizing he had failed to calm Legolas, Thranduil hung his head. /Would you… When Remmen comes to live with Celeborn and I… Would you… Would you and Haldir…/ Why was it so difficult to ask this question? Because asking it would confirm Legolas' suspicion that he indeed was worried.

/I am coming to see you! And I want to have a heart to heart with Celeborn! He convinced you to do this, didn't he?/ Legolas recalled Celeborn's often repeated wish to have another child. /You should have told him no!/

/I love him dearly, Legolas. How can I say no when it's his heart's desire?/ Thranduil's features contorted, instinctively realizing what Legolas' next remark would be.

/Celeborn must have been thrilled when you told him./

Thranduil lowered his eyes, ashamed, even though the gesture was lost on Legolas, who couldn't see him. /I haven't told him yet./

/What?/ Legolas' temper flared with worry. /And when did you plan to do that? At the moment of birth?/ A moment later he regretted his bitter words. /It is my worry that made me lash out./

/I…/ Thranduil looked out of the window, crestfallen. In the distance he could make out the forms of the returning guards with Celeborn riding at the head of the group. /I never told him I died when I had you. I don't want him to know, Legolas, and you won't tell him./

Legolas shook his head once more as his frustration mounted. /Celeborn has the right to know that you can die during the birth./

/I don't want him to know. He will feel guilty./

/He should feel guilty! He maneuvered you into this position – well, condition!/

Thranduil stared at the floor – lost. /I just want him to be happy./ Celeborn had made him happy during these last five decades and as it was within his power too fulfill his lover's wish, he had relented. They had tried to create new life for months now, and had finally succeeded.

/You must tell him the truth,/ said Legolas resolutely. /And Haldir and I will accompany Remmen. It will take us one month at least to reach Eryn Lasgalen and you will rest during your pregnancy. Do you understand?/ Legolas frowned, musing. /Will you contact Elrond? He supervised my pregnancy and he is an accomplished healer./

/Legolas…/ Thranduil wasn't certain he wanted Elrond to know about his condition. After all, Celeborn had been the half-Elf's father in law at one time.

/Nonsense!/ Legolas instinctively knew what direction his father's thoughts were heading in, and smothered the protest that was forthcoming. /I will contact Elrond./

/I know I should have timed this better,/ sent Thranduil. /Celeborn and I took on the responsibility to care for Remmen and Collofin for the next year and I shouldn't be pregnant when I am to prepare them for the tasks they face when coming of age./

Legolas nodded absentmindedly. They wouldn't let Collofin travel alone yet, and Elrond and the young Elf could travel together. /Leave this to me, Ada. Just be careful and rest. And tell Celeborn the truth./

Thranduil sighed in surrender. /I will./

Upon entering their private rooms, Celeborn could tell his lover was severely upset. During these last fifty years he had learned to read Thranduil's expressions extremely well and he headed toward the bed, where the golden-haired Elf was curled up in a fetal position. He sat down on the side, and lovingly stroked the long hair. Leaning in closer, he whispered, "Will you finally tell me what is eating you?" Thranduil's brooding behavior had begun two months ago. The golden-haired Elf had become distant, absentminded and listless. Until now he had allowed his lover his privacy, but for Thranduil's sake he had to find out. "Please tell me."

Thranduil closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. "There is something I should tell you. I don't want to tell you, but… I should."

Growing increasingly worried by his lover's odd behavior, Celeborn moved further onto the bed until he was able to stretch out beside his lover. Snuggling close, he wrapped an arm around Thranduil and possessively draped a leg over the other's thigh. He leaned in closer and sweetly kissed his lover's lips. "Tell me."

"When I had Legolas I died in childbirth." Thranduil had wanted to blurt everything out in one go, but at hearing Celeborn's sharp intake of breath, his eyes opened to look at the silver-haired Elf.

"You… died?" Alarm bells rang in Celeborn's mind.

"I died, but Mithrandir managed to pull me back and somehow he gave me the strength I needed to survive. I felt weak for a very long time, but decided the ordeal had been worth it when he placed Legolas in my arms." He absentmindedly registered the shock in Celeborn's eyes, but was too lost in his memories to comfort his distressed lover. "And now that I am with child again, I—"

"What?" Celeborn's eyes had widened and he barely managed to stop from shaking Thranduil. "You are what?"

"Our efforts paid off," said Thranduil, trying to sound amused and teasing, but his grin turned out a grimace. "You will be a father in eight months."

Celeborn's thoughts raced, his mouth had gone dry and fear gripped him right by his throat. "You died and now you are with child again? My child?" By the Valar, what had he done? And why hadn't Thranduil told him of the dangers? If he had known he could lose his lover he would never have persuaded Thranduil to give him a child!

"I know what you are thinking," said Thranduil, swallowing hard. "But a child was your heart's greatest desire and I couldn't deny you that."

"But what if you die again?" Celeborn – completely shocked – tightened his hold on his lover. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I felt inwardly torn," explained Thranduil, "And maybe this time there won't be any complications. Maybe this time everything will go right."

Celeborn slowly shook his head. "Melethen, I don't know what I feel. I rejoice because you are with child, but my heart pounds with fear now that I know I could lose you!" Had he ever felt this worried, this mentally tormented before? When Celebrían had been injured, he had felt depressed as well, but still it had felt different from this. "I don't want to lose you."

"That is what Legolas said when I told him," said Thranduil. "I farpspoke with him before you entered and he told me to confide in you. And he is right. You deserve the truth."

Celeborn sighed deeply, letting his fingertips soothe away the tormented expression on Thranduil's brow. "You should have told me you died when you gave birth to Legolas. I would never have asked you to carry my child." But he couldn't change the past. He could only hope for the best.

In the Halls of Waiting Námo watched the scene unfold. All pawns were moving toward their destined positions and it wouldn't be long before all of the pieces were in place, and then he would finally have what he had craved for so long.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 16

"Elrond? A letter has arrived from Legolas today." Erestor handed the letter to Elrond with a deep frown on his brow. Although he was still faithfully carrying out his duties, his thoughts always strayed back to Collofin. It was hard to accept that he would have to do without his foster son for a year. Glorfindel was trying hard to console him, but the temporary loss of his adopted son severely affected Erestor, who had come to love Collofin as if he were his own flesh and blood. Absentmindedly, he sat down in front of the blazing fire in the fire place. The flames moved toward him, wrapping his feet in delicate warmth.

Elrond gulped, seeing the fire touch Erestor's skin. The first time this had happened he had smothered the flames by throwing his cloak over the fire, but Erestor had merely given him a puzzled look, explaining to him that it wouldn't burn him, for part of him was fire too.

So now Elrond sat back and watched how the fire slowly crept up Erestor's legs. Delicately small flames danced on his chief advisor's skin and clothing whilst his trusted friend continued to brood – doubtlessly about Collofin's impending departure. Opening the letter, he realized just how deep Erestor's fatherly love ran for their foundling. Elrond chuckled; having to admit that he had grown quite fond of Collofin himself. The youth was a delight to have around and often assisted him in the library when Collofin wasn't painting, singing or composing poetry with Lindir. Collofin was quite the artist, though the young Elf could also expertly wield a sword due to Glorfindel and Magolion's training.

Concentrating on the letter, his breath caught almost immediately. "This can't be."

Elrond's remark drew Erestor's attention and he questioningly looked at his friend. "What is it?"

"Thranduil is with child," said Elrond, surprise palpable in his voice. "He is four months pregnant and Legolas is asking for my assistance, inviting me to stay in Eryn Lasgalen until the child is born." Elrond's brow furrowed. "He expects complications." Elrond paled when he continued to read. "I never knew that Thranduil died when Legolas was born and that Mithrandir pulled him back from the Halls of Mandos."

Erestor's eyes narrowed. "Thranduil is pregnant?"

Elrond put down the letter, moistened his lips and looked Erestor in the eyes. "Yes." Looking at the content of the letter again, he grew extremely worried. "Reading between the lines, I say that Legolas is afraid that the past will repeat itself."

"And that Thranduil will die again?"

Elrond nodded, thinking this through. "When does Collofin leave for Eryn Lasgalen?"

"Tomorrow," said Erestor with a heavy, burdened heart.

"I will join him then. We will travel together."

Some of Erestor's worry faded now that Collofin wouldn't be traveling alone. Collofin had politely rejected their offers to escort him to Eryn Lasgalen, which had hurt Glorfindel's feelings. Glorfindel was protective of his son and wanted to keep him safe. Being told no had hurt. But Erestor understood that Collofin felt ready to fend for himself. He just wasn't sure Glorfindel and he were ready to let go of their son yet. "That reassures me… slightly."

Elrond gave Erestor a look filled with understanding. "I know how you feel, my dearest friend. I felt like that when I had to let my children leave for the very first time. Please know that I will keep Collofin safe."

"He will be peeved that you are accompanying him," said Erestor, smirking.

"Oh, I am certain we will get along," replied Elrond confidently.

Remmen wasn't pleased at all. At first they had agreed he would travel to Eryn Lasgalen alone, but now his parents were going to accompany him. He had looked forward to some measure of freedom.

Haldir registered Remmen's somewhat disappointed expression and laughed warmly. "There will be more journeys than this one in your long life,"

"I hope so!" Remmen and Haldir had already mounted and were waiting for Legolas to join them. "Ada, I understand why you are coming along… I was just hoping to prove to you that I no longer need constant supervision."

Haldir remembered a time when he had been most eager to prove exactly the same thing to Celeborn and understood how his son felt. "There will be plenty of opportunities," he soothed.

Legolas finally mounted and steered his stallion toward Haldir. His normally bright blue eyes had darkened with worry and black circles were building beneath them. "We should hurry."

Haldir reached out and placed his hand on Legolas' shoulder. "Are you *that* worried?"

"A sense of foreboding has taken hold of me," explained Legolas in a tormented tone. "I need to know him alive and well."

Remmen chided himself for his annoyance at having his parents travel with him. They weren't joining him because they didn't trust him to take care of himself, but because they were greatly worried about his grandfather. Seeing Legolas in such a miserable state, Remmen chased away any negative feelings and was determined to do what he could to comfort his father during this journey. He would stand at Legolas' side and be the best son he could.

"May the Valar ride with you, my son." Erestor bestowed a last hug onto Collofin, who firmly returned the embrace. "I will miss you."

"You still have Glorfindel," said Collofin, trying to lighten Erestor's mood. But the truth was that parting hurt. It pained all three of them, but the time had come for him to ride toward his destiny. "You and Glorfindel raised me well. I will make you proud." Smiling at Glorfindel, the misty azure eyes failed to hide their tears from him. "This isn't for forever," he reminded them.

Glorfindel tried to swallow the lump of emotions that had formed in his throat. Walking toward Erestor and Collofin, he opened his arms and buried them in a surprisingly strong hug as if he was unwilling to ever let go of his family. "I wish you would stay," he whispered into his son's ear.

Collofin smiled against Glorfindel's hair and rubbed the small of his father's back. "We will meet again in one year. That isn't as long as it now seems."

Erestor, also locked tightly in Glorfindel's embrace, was unable to wipe at his tears and rubbed his face against the fabric of his lover's tunic instead, drying his tears. Collofin didn't surprise him – being the strongest one of the three of them. There was a hidden strength inside the younger Elf that continued to take him aback. "Please be careful on the road."

"Elrond is riding with me," said Collofin, reminding them. "I won't be on the road alone. And the roads are safe nowadays." He didn't want them to worry about him. "Ada? Would you please let go? Erestor and I can't breathe properly."

His son's teasing tone told Glorfindel to pull back and give Collofin a smile. "It isn't too late yet to reconsider. Let me escort you to Eryn Lasgalen."

"I thank you for your offer," replied Collofin, who was finally able to breathe freely again. "But I am quite safe with Elrond."

Elrond, in the meantime, was saying his goodbyes to Lindir. "I will return after the birth. There is no reason for me to stay a whole year. Collofin and Remmen will become friends and once Thranduil no longer needs me I will return to you, my love."

Lindir pressed a loving kiss onto Elrond's lips. "Even though I hate being parted from you, I know that you are most needed in Eryn Lasgalen. Please hurry back to me in time."

"I will." Elrond composed himself and mounted his horse. "Collofin? Are you coming?" Elrond admired the elegance and fluency in the younger Elf's movements and felt some pride himself, having helped to raise this youngster. Though, even after all these years, something of a mystery clung to Collofin which none could explain.

Collofin mounted the mare, which had been a present from his parents last year and patted the horse's neck. Seated high in the saddle, he looked at his loved ones and friends. Erestor had finally succumbed to his emotions and the dark eyes now released tears. Glorfindel had folded an arm around him and was holding Erestor tight. A bit more in the back were Elrohir and Magolion, smiling at him. They probably remembered the first time they set out for distant lands. "We will meet again in one year!" Pushing his heels into his mare's flanks, he followed Elrond, who now set out for Eryn Lasgalen.

Thranduil tried hard to act cheerfully and carefree, but was unable to fool Celeborn. Thranduil had grown pale during this last month and had lost considerable weight, fought vertigo and radiated exhaustion. Celeborn was slowly beginning to realize he could lose his lover during this pregnancy and did whatever he could to pamper Thranduil. But with each passing day Thranduil grew weaker.

Celeborn joined Thranduil, who was snuggled away in a big chair in their bedroom. The golden-haired Elf stared blankly into the fire whilst a hand restlessly rubbed the swollen abdomen. Kneeling at Thranduil's feet, he pleadingly looked at his lover. "Is there anything I can do to make this more bearable?"

"You can tell me when Elrond will arrive," replied Thranduil in a strained tone. He had been nauseated all morning and hadn't been able to keep anything down for days. When carrying Legolas he had already been in a bad way, but he had never been this miserable. His long, once golden hair rested on his shoulders. It had lost most of its luster and seemed as listless as its owner. The once emerald eyes were dull and unfocused, and tremors rocked his frame. It was becoming clear to him – and no doubt to Celeborn as well – that his pregnancy wasn't progressing as it should.

"He will arrive in a few days." Celeborn hung his head in shame. "This is my fault."

"No, it isn't," soothed Thranduil, reaching out a trembling hand to rest it on Celeborn's hair. "I should have told you about the risks we were taking. This was as much my decision as it was yours."

Tears built in Celeborn's eyes and he quickly changed the subject, unwilling to cry in front of his weakened lover. "I expect Legolas, Haldir and Remmen to arrive tomorrow." Maybe Legolas knew how to improve Thranduil's condition? Celeborn found himself clinging to that hope.

"Yes, I can sense my son. They are very near." Thranduil managed a weak smile, but then sobered quickly. Until now they had avoided discussing a miscarriage, and he judged the time had come to address the matter. "We must face reality, Celeborn. It is obvious that I am not doing well, carrying this child."

"Please don't speak of it," begged Celeborn, lifting swimming eyes to meet his lover's. "Elrond will arrive shortly and he will know of a way to make sure you and the baby remain alive. He also helped deliver Remmen."

"But Legolas was healthy," said Thranduil, reminding his lover. "Legolas was strong. I am not. I am quickly growing increasingly weaker. We must face the possibility that the child won't live. That I will suffer a miscarriage."

"Please don't!" Celeborn firmly gathered Thranduil's surprisingly cold hands in his.

"And then there is the possibility that…" Thranduil paused to gather his courage and strength, "that I won't survive either."

Celeborn released a keening wail and rested his chin on Thranduil's knees, crouching at his lover's feet. "You mustn't say such things!" Shaky with emotion, he finally lifted his eyes to look at Thranduil. He cringed, seeing the tired expression in the once emerald eyes, the slumped shoulders and the resignation on his lover's face. "You must fight!"

Thranduil freed a hand from Celeborn's possessive hold and gently stroked the silver-haired Elf's face. "I love you, Celeborn. The Valar know I love you, and that I don't wish to be parted from you, but we might not have a say in this, melethen."

"I cannot live without you!" Celeborn moved closer and wrapped his arms around Thranduil's knees, pleadingly looking up at his lover. "This is my fault. I should never have…" Words failed him, feeling Thranduil tense against him.

"Bathroom…" whispered Thranduil, "now."

Celeborn rose from the floor, pushed his arms beneath the weakened Elf and easily lifted him to carry Thranduil into the bathroom. Thranduil wasted no time throwing up the little water he'd had today and Celeborn steadied him, smoothing his lover' hair away from his face. Then horror struck him, seeing the blood in the sink. Tears finally crept down his face, fully realizing he *would* lose Thranduil and their unborn child.

Námo's heart felt burdened, seeing Thranduil suffer and he wished he could ease the Elf's pain. He regretted that this was necessary, but it was the only way.

Remmen and Haldir exchanged a look. During these last thirty days, Legolas had grown very silent and emotionally distant. They suspected it had everything to do with Thranduil and had tried coaxing Legolas into talking, but to no avail.

"We should arrive within the hour," said Haldir, hoping the news would soothe Legolas. They had traveled at the highest possible speed and had covered the distance as planned.

During their journey, Remmen realized how grave the situation was and had supported his father in whatever way possible. But then Legolas had put this emotional distance between the two of them and the young Elf didn't know how to handle that. Thankfully, Haldir had realized what was happening and had comforted Remmen, whenever their son felt lost and confused.

Legolas seemed to awaken from the trance he was in and flinched, seeing the look in his son's eyes. "Oh, I am sorry I hurt you," Legolas whispered in a broken tone. "I never wanted to ignore you, but… Thranduil… He is in a bad way, my son." These last few days his father's pain had mounted, and through their connection he had felt it too.

Remmen steered his horse closer to Legolas, and once he was close enough, he managed to fold an arm around his father. "I think I understand."

"Thank you." Legolas squeezed his son's shoulder and forced a smile onto his face. However, it was a fake smile, as he sensed his father was slowly dying.

Terror took hold of Celeborn, finding blood still slipped past Thranduil's lips and when he helped the younger Elf to lie down, he also found the seat of his lover's leggings stained with dark blood. "What's happening?" Oh, he knew what was happening! He just didn't want to acknowledge it!

Thranduil bit his bottom lip in an attempt to keep his pain inside and to not scream out. Reclining into a prone position, he stared blankly at the ceiling. "I am losing the child."

Celeborn's silver mane danced angrily when he shook his head in denial. "No, this can't be happening. Tell me what to do. Tell me how to stop the bleeding!"

"You can't," whispered Thranduil, exhaustion quickly overtaking him. "The child is dead within me and needs a way out." He paused to gather his breath. "We need Elrond."

Wringing his hands, Celeborn went down onto his knees next to the bed. He placed his hands on either side of Thranduil's head and looked deeply into the green eyes. "I never wanted any of this to happen!" His voice had taken on a tone of horror, loss and confusion. Unable to think clearly, he simply continued to stare at his weakened lover.

"Let me help!" Legolas stormed into the room, and although he was shocked to find Thranduil in this state, he pushed his emotions aside. He had to concentrate! It was apparent that Celeborn was in a state of total shock and wouldn't be much help, so Legolas called Haldir to him.

"Stay here, Remmen." Haldir left his son in the doorway. He would have preferred for Remmen not to see this, but knew the young Elf would protest against being sent away.

Remmen's breath caught at the sight of the dark blood that clung to his grand father's lips and that now dripped onto the once stainless, white sheets. When he had realized how different he was from other Elves, he had never thought there was a possibility he could die during a pregnancy, but seeing Thranduil now, he realized the seriousness of the situation.

"Legolas… my son," Thranduil even managed a smile at finding his son close so unexpectedly. "It is the child…"

Legolas firmly nodded once. "I know that, Ada!" He cast an infuriated look at Celeborn for getting this father into this condition. And although he knew that this was Thranduil's fault as well, it was easier to lash out at the silver-haired Elf than at his father. "Why? Why couldn't you just respect him saying no?"

Celeborn swayed on his knees. Legolas' words hit him like a physical blow, once more reminding him that he was responsible for the miserable state his lover was in. "I didn't know…" he whispered, barely audible.

Haldir sat on his heels and assisted Celeborn in slowly rising from the floor. "Where is Elrond? Why isn't he attending to Thranduil?"

"He hasn't arrived yet," said Celeborn in a distant, emotionless tone as his guilt overwhelmed him.

Haldir cringed, his features contorting, as he exchanged a look with his husband. He saw the tears in Legolas' eyes and recognized the helpless expression in them. The truth was that Legolas didn't know how to help his father, how to give him the strength to survive. Haldir realized that bitter truth that very moment.

"I will die," said Thranduil, weakly. His eyes sought out Celeborn's, but his lover's gaze was downcast and it was obvious the silver-haired Elf didn't dare to look at him. The dead child – still inside him – would take him into death with him. "It isn't your fault, meleth," he added, seeking to alleviate Celeborn's anguish.

"But it is," said Celeborn firmly, finally lifting his gaze to meet Thranduil's. "This is my fault!" Thranduil's eyes were filled with suffering and the once smooth skin was now covered in cold sweat. Life was quickly fleeing Thranduil's body. For him, joy would leave Arda together with Thranduil's last breath. /If I could, I would die in your place./

Those were the very words Námo had been waiting for.

Námo seldom left the Halls of Waiting, but this time he did, and manifested in Eryn Lasgalen – in Thranduil's bedroom. Unseen, he moved toward Celeborn, studying the silver-haired Elf. This was what he had always wanted – had always craved. Celeborn was old, strong, cunning, amusing and most of all, his heart was capable of a love he had never seen before. These were the very things he counted on when he allowed Celeborn to see him. /Celeborn, Prince of Doriath, see me./

Celeborn's eyes widened impossibly, finding a stranger in their midst. For one moment he thought he had lost his mind, as no one else seemed to notice the stranger, but then he recalled the offer he had made. He had offered to die for Thranduil. /Are you…?/

/I am Námo, yes./ With one hand the Vala reached out to caress Thranduil's brow. The golden-haired Elf's soft moans of pain faded away at the touch. But the first signs of death replaced them; the weakened Elf's body radiated cold and ice seemed to form on the dying Elf's brow.

"No!" Weeping brokenly, Legolas wrapped his arms around his father and pulled him close against him. "No, I won't let you go!" But the body in his arms was cold, and life was seeping through their fingers. Thranduil was only seconds away from entering the Halls of Waiting for all eternity.

Remmen, who had obeyed Haldir until now, hurried over to his father's side and supported Legolas in turn. Even despite his young age he keenly felt the drama which was taking place here and he did his best to soothe his distressed father.

/You said you would die for him. Are those just words or are you prepared to follow through?/ Námo studied Celeborn, wondering what the former Prince of Doriath would decide.

Celeborn shivered, taking in Námo's form. The Vala's skin was as white as ice. Long, white hair framed a face which was ethereal in its beauty and long strands descended down the gracious back. Narrow, pale lips, bereft of any color twitched nervously. The Vala was dressed in luxurious white robes, lined with fur. A circlet of star-shaped icicles and frozen flowers adorned Námo's hair. Looking into Námo's eyes took what remained of Celeborn's courage. The pupils were white and existed of a thousand minute snowflakes, whilst the irises were of the gentlest blue he had ever seen. His first instinct was to recoil from the Dooms man, but those eyes reassured him that Námo didn't mean him ill. /I meant those words./ By now Celeborn realized that he was the only one able to see the Vala, and he focused on Námo, instead of Thranduil, seeing a chance to save the weakened Elf's life. /I mean it. I will die for him./

Celeborn trembled violently against him, and Haldir's concern increased. What kind of effect would losing Thranduil have on his foster father? His attention was drawn toward Legolas and Remmen, who were holding on to Thranduil, trying to keep the elder Elf with them by whispering words of love. Seeing Legolas weep unashamedly at the impending loss, he wished he could comfort his husband, but he didn't dare let go of Celeborn, afraid of what might happen if he did.

"No, Ada, you can't die! Don't leave me! I won't allow it!" Legolas was prepared to fight for his father's life, but there was so little he could do!

Thranduil's eyes opened one last time and he managed to caress a strand of his son's hair. "I… love… you… son…" Using his last strength, he sought out Celeborn's form and his last breath caught, seeing the Vala at his bedside, who had doubtlessly come for him. A smile formed on his face, realizing his time had come. Maybe he would finally be reunited with the love of his life in the Halls of Waiting.

"No, take *me* instead of him!" In his distress, Celeborn called out to Námo, ignoring the other Elves. "Take me! But let him live!" This was his fault any way. If he hadn't persuaded Thranduil to give him a child, none of this would have happened! It was only fitting that *he* paid the price for his foolishness, and not Thranduil. "Take *me*!"

A smile, filled with sorrow and strangely enough also with longing, surfaced on Námo's face at hearing Celeborn's words. Lifting his right hand he rested it on Celeborn's shoulder. /So be it, Child of Doriath. Your life is forfeit and Thranduil's life restored./

Those were the last words Celeborn heard in life, for when he collapsed against Haldir, life left his body and his fëa was already on its way to the Halls of Waiting.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 17

A scream – resembling that one of a newborn – left Thranduil's blood-stained lips. In those short moments of near death, he had heard Celeborn's dooming words. He had also seen the sad, yet also content expression on Námo's face, and he released a series of sobs, realizing the deal that had been made had cost Celeborn's life. "No…!"

Legolas' eyes fastened on his father's form. The younger Elf didn't dare believe his father was still alive, and he had never registered Celeborn collapsing into a heap on the floor as his attention was focused solely on his father.

Haldir immediately fell to his knees to examine Celeborn. A quick check told him that there was no pulse and that his foster father had stopped breathing. Horrified, he stared at the lifeless body, which he now pressed close to his chest. "I… don't… I don't understand," he stuttered in disbelief.

Thranduil's swimming eyes released fat tears. "I heard… what happened… Námo took him… instead of me…" Then a merciful sleep came over him, taking away the discomfort his miscarriage brought. Absentmindedly, he understood that the child still needed to leave his body, but he was too emotionally hurt and broken to give it much thought. Hopefully, Elrond would arrive shortly and help him heal.

They sat in shock, huddling close together. Celeborn's remains lay in the center of the room after Haldir and Legolas had tended to it. They had washed Celeborn and dressed him in his finest robes. His hair had been combed and braided, his hands folded. He merely looked asleep, but they all knew the truth.

"As is custom, we will burn his body on the pyre at sunset," said Haldir softly. He hadn't only just lost a good friend, but also his foster father – the Elf who had loved him for most of his life. "I still don't understand."

Legolas bowed his head, and stared at the floor, sending a prayer to the Valar. Recalling Thranduil's words, he said, "Celeborn made a decision, Haldir. He loved my father so much that he died for him."

Haldir found it hard to accept that the Vala Námo had made such a bargain. But how else could he explain the inexplicable? How else could he explain the fact that Thranduil lived and that Celeborn had sagged against him in death?

"I need to sit with my father," said Legolas in a gentle voice. Thranduil was deeply asleep, but not out of danger until the dead fetus had been removed from his father's body. "Send Elrond to me the moment he arrives." He placed a kiss on Haldir's brow, gave him an encouraging look and then hurried to join his father.

Remmen, seeing his father's distress, wrapped an arm around Haldir's waist. He was still trying to understand and accept what he had witnessed, and if he was struggling with all that, his father had to be in an even greater emotional upheaval. His youth showed when no words of comfort came to him, and he reacted the only way he knew how – by hugging Haldir close and holding his father tight.

Legolas sat at Thranduil's bedside, loosely holding his father's hand in his. Deep lines had formed on Thranduil's brow, and the thin, bloodless lips moved whenever his father drew in a new breath. He spoke softly, in need of hearing a voice, even if it was just his own. "I hope Celeborn's sacrifice wasn't in vain, Ada. You are still in a bad way." The dead fetus was slowly poisoning Thranduil from the inside. "We need Elrond."

"You may open your eyes, Celeborn. I won't harm you," said Námo, wondering if he had made the right decision after all. But there had been no other way – not for him, nor for Celeborn. This was their destiny.

Celeborn hadn't even realized he had squeezed his eyes shut and quickly opened them to take in his surroundings. He was in a spacious hall with a high ceiling and all around him were tapestries, which depicted Arda's history. "The Halls of Waiting. I am really dead then."

"Yes, you are," said Námo, sitting down on one of the chairs near the fireplace. "Come over here and join me."

Cautiously, Celeborn complied. His eyes narrowed, studying Námo. The reality of his situation hadn't really registered with him yet when he sat down opposite the Vala. A part of him needed more time to truly understand that he had died and was now in the Halls of Waiting. The surrealistic setting of this conversation should have made it easier for him to understand and accept he was dead, but it didn't. "Is Thranduil well?"

"Better. Elrond will arrive within the next hour and operate on him. Thranduil will make a full recovery. You bought life for him with your death." Námo reached for a carafe and filled a crystal glass with sweet miruvor, which he promptly offered Celeborn.

Celeborn raised an eyebrow. "Can the dead drink?"

"Why don't you try and find out?"

Celeborn accepted the glass and took a careful sip. The miruvor flowed down his throat, warming him from the inside. "I must admit death is nothing like I imagined it would be."

"You are only seeing part of my Halls. I will show you the rest later," said the Vala, wondering about his next step. Seeing the sorrow and guilt in Celeborn's eyes, he felt he needed to comfort the other. "You made the right decision, Child of Doriath. Thranduil was never meant for you."

Anger flared in Celeborn's eyes. "I love him!"

"Yes, you do," said the Vala quickly, trying to placate Celeborn, "And you made the ultimate sacrifice, but Thranduil still wasn't meant for you."

Celeborn's anger increased. "How can you say that?"

A gentle and understanding expression appeared in the frost-blue eyes. "Thranduil never stopped loving Remmen."

"But Remmen is dead!" Oops, Remmen was in the Halls of Waiting as well. Would they run into each other? That might be awkward! Celeborn wasn't certain what to make of this development.

"Remmen has been granted another chance." Námo carefully monitored Celeborn's reaction. "He was reborn forty-nine years ago and is about to reach his majority. His path will lead him back to Thranduil and he is only hours away from being reunited with his love."

Celeborn's eyes almost bulged from their sockets. "What?"

The Vala nodded to confirm his words. "Your sacrifice was painful but necessary. Remmen will help Thranduil deal with the loss of his child and in time, Thranduil will recover. You must understand, Celeborn," said Námo, leaning in closer to deepen their eye contact, "Their love doesn't compare to yours. They are two halves of one soul. Yes, you love Thranduil, but not in the same way that Remmen does."

"I died for him!" Celeborn flung the glass against the wall, where the crystal shattered into tiny pieces. "I died for him! Don't you tell me I didn't love him enough!"

A soft smile curled the corners of Námo's lips. Yes, there was much fire and passion in this one, just as he had thought. Rising from his chair as well, he stood his ground, whilst Celeborn glared at him. "Prince of Doriath, your destiny lies elsewhere – not with Thranduil."

Celeborn's eyes shot daggers at the Vala. "Did you trick me?" He hadn't thought it possible for a Vala to act in such an honorless way, but suddenly he found himself wondering. "You did trick me! By taking my life instead of Thranduil's you cleared the way for Remmen!"

Námo gave Celeborn an apologetic smile. "I did. I have planned this for the last few decades."

"Why? Just to reunite Remmen and Thranduil?" Where did that leave him?

"No, not just to reunite them." Námo moistened his lips. He wanted to confide in Celeborn, but couldn't – not yet. Celeborn was still too infuriated and wouldn't listen to him. He had to bide his time and hopefully Celeborn would let go of his anger. He had to wait for Celeborn to come to him. "I have other reasons as well. Personal ones."

This admission made Celeborn even more suspicious. /What are your plans? What is your hidden agenda and why does it involve me?/

Námo sensed Celeborn's suspicion and walked toward the doorway, realizing the newest addition to his halls needed a moment of privacy to compose himself. "I will return later."

Celeborn nodded once. First he wanted to mourn losing Thranduil and then he would find out Námo's intentions where he was concerned. No one manipulated him in such a way!

Elrond grew alarmed when no one was there to welcome them to Eryn Lasgalen. Signaling for Collofin to dismount as well, they entered the building and headed in the direction several voices were coming from. Instinctively, he knew something very disconcerting had happened, and he wondered what it was. /By the Valar, I just hope everyone is well./

Collofin stayed a few feet behind Elrond, feeling confused and then… A voice registered with him, soft and gentle, but when he looked about no one was close. Elrond had entered the room to their right, and as he hadn't followed, he now stood alone in the corridor. That voice – that sweet, gentle and teasing voice was calling to him.

In the meantime, Elrond had frozen in shock at finding Celeborn's lifeless body in the center of the room with Haldir and Remmen crying softly next to the bier. "What happened here?"

At hearing Elrond's voice, Haldir lifted his head and stared bleary-eyed at the half-Elf. "You!" Pushing away from his son, he raced toward Elrond and grabbed the healer's arm. "You have to come with me - now!"

Elrond decided it was best to let Haldir take the lead in this. Looking over his shoulder, he stared at Celeborn's face, frozen in death. By the Valar, what *had* happened here?

Collofin stood entranced, wondering what was happening to him. Absentmindedly he registered Haldir and Elrond hurrying down the corridor and he instinctively followed. When they reached Thranduil's rooms, Haldir flung the door open and pushed Elrond inside. From a distance, Collofin followed, watching closely as Elrond approached the bed.

Collofin had never seen Thranduil or Legolas before. Yes, he had met Haldir and Remmen once when they had visited Imladris, but Legolas hadn't joined them on that journey. As if hypnotized, his gaze fastened on Thranduil's face – his eyes, and then he lost himself in them.

Elrond wasted no time, instantly realizing the graveness of the situation. "I have to perform surgery. Haldir, fetch me clean bandages. Legolas, I need hot water. Arrange for those things now!"

Legolas allowed for a sigh of relief to escape his lips now that Elrond had arrived. "Please take good care of him."

"I will." Elrond focused on his patient whilst Haldir and Legolas carried out his orders. Damn it, he needed an extra pair of hands! Why hadn't he brought Elrohir with him?

"Can I help?" Collofin shuffled into the room. His gaze remained fastened on Thranduil and his heart did something amazing; it thumped with love – with memories.

"Yes, you can!" Elrond sighed. Collofin had some basic training as a healer, but had seldom dealt with patients. "We need to undress him!"

Collofin nodded once and then carried out his appointed task with infinite tenderness. He knew every spot of Thranduil's body. Knew where to touch to illicit a mew of passion and where to touch to soothe. Knew the other as well as he knew himself. The realization was absolute and instant.

Elrond noticed the tenderness and care in Collofin's ministrations and wondered about that. But he pushed those thoughts away, as he needed to concentrate on his patient. Now that Thranduil's distended abdomen was revealed, he swallowed hard, knowing he had to cut the blond Elf open in order to remove the child from Thranduil's body.

Haldir arrived first, placing towels, wash cloths and bandages on the side table next to Thranduil's bed. He then stood back, giving Elrond the space he needed to work. Legolas arrived next, putting two large bowls of hot water near the bed. "Elrond? How can I help?" He desperately wanted to help his father!

"Don't get in my way," said Elrond calmly, cleaning the area he would operate on. Before placing the tip of the small knife on Thranduil's skin, he made sure his patient was still unconscious.

"He can't die… Please," begged Legolas, leaning heavily against Haldir for support.

"He won't die, ernilen dithen (my little prince). I won't let him die, I promise."

Legolas' heart stopped beating for one moment, being called something he hadn't been called since his childhood. "What did you call me?" He had been so focused on Thranduil that he had barely noticed the golden-haired Elf that was working alongside Elrond and whose face was hidden behind a curtain of red and gold.

"Ernilen dithen, Legolas." Collofin briefly looked Legolas in the eyes.

Stupefied, Legolas stared at the so familiar face that still comforted him in his dreams at night. "Can't… be."

Elrond cursed softly. He had no idea what was happening, and didn't have the time to find out. "Focus, Collofin!" He had opened Thranduil's stomach and was about to remove the dead fetus. He couldn't afford making mistakes!

"Collofin? But…" Legolas swallowed hard, but failed to rid himself of the lump of emotions that had formed in his throat. He knew that face, that voice, those eyes! And a different name belonged to them! But that couldn't be! No!

"We will discuss this later, pen-neth. We need to concentrate on your nana first," said Collofin, trying to calm down Legolas, who was growing increasingly upset.

"Pen-neth?" whispered Haldir questioningly.

Elrond finally finished surgery and closed Thranduil's abdomen. "He will live," he said, sighing deeply. "And now I want to know what this is about!" He stared inquisitively at Collofin, who was many millennia younger than Legolas, so why would the younger Elf call Legolas pen-neth?

Collofin wanted to explain, but first he needed to make sure Thranduil was out of danger. He carefully sat down on the bedside and smoothed damp strands away from Thranduil's sweat covered face. Then he did something he had thought he would never do again – he reached out with his mind and touched a tendril of Thranduil's being. /Meleth?/

Thranduil, who had been drowning in unconsciousness, instantly opened his eyes. He couldn't possibly feel what he was feeling! But the eyes he looked into were so familiar. And so was the touch of the hands sliding through his hair. What sweet vision was this? "Rem…men?"

Collofin nodded once and smiled. "I have returned to you. I didn't know who I was until I saw you, and Legolas." He leaned in closer, and ignoring the blood on Thranduil's lips, kissed him.

Something suddenly registered with Legolas. "He called him nana. Remmen always did that, knowing it annoyed Thranduil to be called that."

Collofin's smile became radiant. "Yes, it always did frustrate your nana."

Unable to deal with more revelations, Thranduil slipped back into a merciful, dreamless sleep.

Collofin refused to leave Thranduil's side when Elrond ordered him to join them in the corridor. "I have been without him for so long that I refuse to leave him alone now that I have finally found him again!"

Elrond shook his head, wondering what he was supposed to do. "Thranduil is asleep and it's a healing sleep. We should disturb him as little as possible."

"My presence here won't disturb him. It will help him heal." Collofin drew in a deep breath. "I want a moment alone with my son and husband."

Elrond gulped for breath. "Collofin, I don't know why you think you are Remmen, but—"

"I *am* Remmen," said Collofin steadfast. "And now I want a moment with my son and husband." His tone was demanding and authoritative and he could see it was throwing Elrond off balance. He would apologize for his behavior later.

"This goes against my better judgment," said Elrond, almost gnashing his teeth in frustration. When he looked at Haldir, he found that the silver-haired Elf was just as reluctant to leave.

But then Haldir frowned deeply, remembering something. "Remmen's portrait." Thranduil had shown it to him once, many years ago. The face had faded in his memory, but now that he looked more closely at Collofin it seemed familiar.

Legolas rose from the bed, searched the pockets of his father's tunic and when he had found the portrait, he handed it to Elrond. "This is my father. This is Remmen."

Elrond stared at the portrait, sharply sucking in his breath and then looked at Collofin. "This is your face."

Collofin nodded again. "My memories were dormant until I found Thranduil again. But it is true; Námo allowed me to return to Arda so I could be reunited with my family."

"Námo…" Haldir wondered about the Vala. Námo had taken Celeborn's fëa instead of Thranduil's. And now that Celeborn was gone… "He tricked us."

"I don't know why Námo does what he does: I only know that I am here and that my memories are once more intact. I know I am Remmen. I know that Thranduil is my husband and Legolas my son. I know this!"

Elrond relented eventually, unwilling to cause more commotion whilst Thranduil was asleep and recovering. He signaled for Haldir to join him and stepped into the corridor.

"I need to find and look after my son," said Haldir thoughtfully. "And I reckon I have to do some explaining as well."

Elrond nodded absentmindedly. He had a lot to think about as well.

Legolas carefully approached the golden-haired Elf, slightly afraid to believe his father had truly returned to them. When he looked at Collofin, he saw his father's face and eyes. He was at a loss to explain this.

"Ernilen dithen. Come and sit with your Ada. I have missed having you close." Collofin patted the space beside him on the bed. "Be careful not to wake Thranduil."

Legolas complied and sat down, constantly searching the other's eyes. "Is it really you?"

"Yes, pen-neth, it is. I don't why Námo allowed me to return, but I am here. Search your heart and you will find my words true."

Legolas swallowed nervously. "Ada?"

Collofin smiled, pleased. "Yes, ernilen dithen, though I can hardly still call you that. You have become an adult since the last time I held you." Together with that memory returned feelings of suffering. "Your life and safety mattered most. You do understand that? When those Orcs attacked I could only think of getting you into safety. But I am not a warrior, my son, at least not a good one. I gladly gave my life so you could live."

Legolas' eyes swam with tears, recalling that awful event. "You died!"

"I died saving you," confirmed Collofin. "My greatest fear was that Thranduil couldn't deal with my passing. Thank you for keeping him on Arda."

"I didn't want him to go! I had just lost you and…" Legolas sagged against Collofin and when the other Elf wrapped his arms around him, Legolas inhaled the other's scent, recognizing it. "It *is* you!"

Collofin chuckled softly. "When I left Imladris I had no idea this would happen."

Legolas' euphoria slowly faded, recalling what had happened only hours ago. "Celeborn died so Thranduil could live, and he lost their child, Ada."

"I gathered as much," replied Collofin in a heavy tone. "Your nana will need the two of us to help him deal with the loss."

"You had better stop calling him that," said Legolas teasingly. "Remember the last time he got back at you for calling him nana?"

"Oh, yes, I do!" Collofin smiled fondly. He hadn't been able to sit properly for days! They had never told Legolas the real reason why he needed pillows whenever he sat down. Thranduil had really loved him that night! /That reminds me…I should return that favor when the time is right./ But first they would help Thranduil during his recovery process. The three of them were finally reunited and nothing and no one would ever break them up again!

Pouting, Celeborn paced the confines of the hall. Through the doorway he could look into the corridor, but he felt absolutely no desire to explore the Halls, even though he wondered if he would see old friends and fallen comrades in arms again. /I curse you, Námo, for manipulating me like that!/ Námo had cunningly cleared the way for Remmen to return to Thranduil's side. /And what of the pain and misery you dealt Thranduil? He lost his child!/

Celeborn finally came to a stop, wondering about his next move. It would be best to take the initiative and to stay one step ahead of Námo. Who knew what the Vala had planned for him? He carefully headed for the doorway and looked down the corridor. At the end of it, the wall reflected the warm glow of a fire. /I am dead. My fëa traveled to the Halls of Waiting and I will be here for a very long time. That's providing I will be allowed to be reborn./ Something, which he doubted very much. He was probably here for all eternity. /I had better make the best of that!/

After straightening his robes, he proudly raised his head and started down the corridor.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 18

Námo sensed Celeborn's approach, but pretended ignorance. He sat opposite one of the newer fëar, which had arrived only a few minutes ago, and which was drowning in shock and confusion. Most of the souls needed a listening ear, and some encouragement before they dared to venture into the more crowded parts of the Halls, where they would be reunited with the loved ones whom they had lost so many years ago. It was one of his tasks – maybe his most important one – to soothe and comfort them. He strengthened them and then sent them off to the main hall, where family and lovers awaited the new arrival.

"You will meet your mother and father again, and your brother," said Námo, still ignoring Celeborn, who had reached the doorway by now. Consoling this new, lost soul was more important than satisfying Celeborn's curiosity. "Come with me." Námo rose from his chair and carefully guided the trembling soul into the next room. He let go of the soul's hand when family and loved ones moved closer to care for the new arrival and he stepped back, smiling as the fëa's light burned golden. It had taken him a long time before he had found his place here and he still occasionally succumbed to the darkness and despair that lingered here. And that was why he needed Celeborn so badly.

Celeborn walked toward Námo, clearing his throat to announce his presence. "I apologize if I am disturbing you."

"You are not," said the Vala in a soft voice. "He has found his place here."

Celeborn came to a halt beside Námo and studied the Vala. Something wet glistered in the frost-blue eyes, taking him aback. "These Halls are nothing like I thought they would be."

"They were designed to be a cold, lonely place where souls could await their rebirth," explained Námo, turning toward Celeborn. "When I accepted my work here, their loneliness quickly began to affect me and I had to change the way things were handled. Manwe approved, for which I am eternally grateful." He signaled for Celeborn to walk with him, which the silver-haired Elf promptly did. Encouraged, he continued, "These tapestries distract the mourning souls and remind them of happier times. There is little I can do to make their stay more pleasant, but I do my best."

Celeborn's eyes widened, stepping into a large and crowded Hall. In the center stood a large, round table with countless Elves seated around it, eating, drinking and talking. Some of them were playing at dice; others sang bittersweet songs of their past lives. He even spotted several Elves who were holding hands, giving one another loving looks. As his gaze scanned the Hall, he recognized one face after the other and tears appeared in his eyes, finding Ecthelion, Ereinion and several other familiar faces amongst them.

"Welcome, my son!" Galadhon approached quickly. Although he was saddened to see his son had entered the Halls of Waiting, his heart also rejoiced, for he was finally reunited with Celeborn. "Your brother is also here and will be most pleased to see you."

Celeborn stared at his father in disbelief. They had lost touch a long time ago, and he hadn't known his father had died. Acting instinctively, he opened his arms and hugged Galadhon tightly. "Ada."

"My brother!" Galathil now joined them as well and embraced his brother the moment their father released Celeborn. "My heart weeps because you are dead, but it is good to see you again!"

Celeborn felt overwhelmed when one by one old friends and comrades in arms walked up to him to welcome him. He soon lost track of Námo, as his friends steered him toward the table, offering him wine, which he quickly downed. Although he rejoiced at seeing his family and friends again, his nerves were thoroughly shaken. His father patted his shoulder and even Ecthelion had joined them, grinning at him. "Too much," he whispered, upset. "This is too much." Suddenly the familiar faces around him faded away, the noise died and he found himself seated next to the fireplace. He was back in the hall where he had first talked to Námo, and he felt incredibly grateful that his peace had momentarily been restored.

"They can be somewhat enthusiastic," said Námo calmly.

Celeborn raised his head to look at the Vala. Námo had shed his robes and was now wearing a white shirt and gray leggings. The long, white hair was loose and danced against the small of his back. In his hand was a glass filled with ruby-red wine. "It is always a great joy for them to be rejoined with one of their loved ones."

"This is somewhat of a shock," admitted Celeborn in a hoarse tone. He accepted the glass of wine when Námo offered it to him and stared absentmindedly into the swirling liquid. "I will spend the rest of eternity here?"

Námo nodded slowly. "That is most likely. Manwe only rarely allows souls to be reborn and to return to Arda."

"He made an exception for Remmen," Celeborn said, bitterness audible in his voice.

Námo sighed deeply. "I understand that it is still too early for you to understand and accept, but the love Remmen and Thranduil share is extraordinary. Did you know Thranduil tried to gain entry to my Halls on several occasions? He took his life once, and then allowed himself to fade a few more times. Never before did I have such a hard time in keeping someone out of my Halls. It was his greatest desire to be reunited with the love of his life and it broke my heart to repeatedly deny him."

"I didn't know that," admitted Celeborn softly. He was slowly beginning to realize there were things about Thranduil he had never known about. "Can I be completely honest with you?"

"But of course." The Vala seated himself opposite Celeborn, drinking in the other's inner light and the soft glow that was his soul.

Celeborn closed his eyes; it was hard on him to admit the truth. "I always wondered why Thranduil accepted me as his lover. There was something about him that I could never quite reach. A core of his being that I could never really touch."

"His heart belongs to Remmen. It always did," offered Námo, "But for a little while you made his life more bearable. You brought a spark of hope, love and light into his life. You made the right decisions, Celeborn. You did the right thing by loving him." His tone grew heavy and saddened. "But in your heart you always knew it wouldn't last forever. Find comfort in the fact that you restored hope and love to his life."

Námo's surprisingly compassionate and understanding words made Celeborn open his eyes so he could look upon the Vala, who seemed to have taken him under his wing. "Was it really necessary to take the child as well?"

Námo's soft-blue eyes filled with understanding. "The child's fate was decided long ago. The pregnancy and miscarriage served their purpose and please forgive me for those brutal words, but they speak of the truth."

"I have been masterly manipulated," said Celeborn from between gnashing teeth.

"I plead guilty," replied Námo in a burdened voice, "but it was the only way. Your soul needed to travel to my Halls—"

"And you just knew I would give my life to save Thranduil's."

"I did," admitted Námo, "I counted on you to make that offer."

Realizing he was dealing with a formidable opponent, Celeborn decided to act more cautiously around the Vala. /Who knows what else is on his agenda./

Námo unwillingly picked up on Celeborn's thoughts. He hadn't intended to spy on the silver-haired Elf, but it had just happened. Hiding his own thoughts very carefully, he reveled in the beauty, light and love that Celeborn radiated. /*You* are, meleth./

Elrond sat nursing his herbal tea, staring at Celeborn's lifeless body. The last time he had felt such shock was when Elros had died. What in Elbereth's name had transpired here? From what he had gathered Thranduil had been dying and Celeborn had taken his place, dying in his stead. The perfectly healthy former Lord of the Golden Wood had simply sagged against Haldir – dead. And Thranduil had drawn in a new, first breath, as life had been restored to him. /I can't believe Celeborn is gone./

Haldir quietly sat beside the half-Elf, easily reading the other's emotions on his face. "It's hard to accept that he is gone," whispered Haldir, afraid to speak too loudly in the presence of death. "He has been a father to me my whole life."

Absentmindedly, Elrond nodded. "He helped me accept and deal with the loss of my wife. Without him, I would never have found my will to live and love again."

Hazel eyes filled with tears and Haldir angrily wiped at them, not wanting to weep so openly. "I hope he will drive Námo insane!" A soft chuckle fled his lips. "That Vala has no idea whom he dragged into his Halls!"

Elrond managed a similar chuckle. It was easier to remember Celeborn's bright and lively nature than to reminisce on his death. "I wish he had been allowed to stay with us for a longer period time. He left too early."

"He made his decision," said Legolas, who now entered as well. He came to a standstill in front of the bier and reverently bowed his head. "I owe him my father's life and for that I will always respect and love him – for as long as I shall live."

"Thank you," whispered Haldir, who now finally allowed his tears to leave his eyes. He let them flow freely down his face, never wiping them away. Legolas' words had deeply touched him. "We can do nothing for Celeborn," he said in an emotional voice, "But we can support Thranduil through this time of loss."

Which reminded Elrond… "Are you absolutely certain Collofin and Remmen are one and the same person?"

"I am convinced that Collofin is Remmen reborn, yes," confirmed Legolas, "I see it in his eyes."

"This is most unexpected," mumbled Elrond, wondering how Erestor and Glorfindel would react to the news that their adopted son possessed Remmen's soul.

"My father will be most fragile when he wakes up," said Legolas, thoughtfully, "He suffered a miscarriage and he lost Celeborn. Finding Remmen at his side again won't make this any easier. He won't know how to handle this situation."

"We will all be there for him," said Elrond, reassuringly.

Legolas drew in a deep breath and then turned to face Haldir. "Would you look after our son? I have the feeling my father will need me greatly during the next few days."

Haldir rose and wrapped an arm around Legolas, who promptly leaned in and rested his head against the silver-haired Elf's shoulder. "But of course, my love. I will look after him whilst you concentrate on Thranduil."

"Where is he now?" Legolas looked about, wondering where their son had gone.

"He wanted to do something useful, so I showed him to the kitchen and bade him to prepare some food for us." Haldir had seen the desire to help in Remmen's eyes and had acted on it. "He already made and brought Elrond some tea. He likes being useful."

"He will make a good husband in time," said Legolas, smiling pleased. "We raised him well."

"Yes, that we did. Now, why are you still here when you should be at your father's side?" Seeing Legolas glance worriedly at Celeborn's body, Haldir added, "Elrond and I will see to him. He will be treated with the utmost respect and we will never forget the sacrifice he made."

"I wish he could have lived. During these last few decades I have come to love and care for him." Legolas briefly exchanged a look with Elrond, seeing his pain reflected in the gray eyes. "Thank you for performing this last duty."

"It is an honor," said Elrond in a raw voice. He slowly rose and released a heavy sigh. "Support your father in this dark time and let us care for Celeborn's body."

Legolas nodded thankfully, swallowing hard, trying to rid himself of the lump of emotions that had formed in his throat and then he left the room, instinctively knowing his parents needed him.

Seldom had he felt this lost and confused. Thranduil's dreams were chaotic and feverish, showing him Námo accepting Celeborn's offer and carrying the conquered fëa to his Halls. /No, don't… Don't do this… This is my fault… not yours! I should have told you the truth! Instead, I kept quiet, never telling you about the risks concerning this pregnancy… I should have died, not you… Never you!/

His guilt increased ten-fold, remembering he had lost infinitely more than just Celeborn. He had also lost his child. A terrible sense of loss, grief and guilt washed through him, leaving him adrift on this sea of emotions. /I don't deserve to live! I should have died too!/ But apparently Námo still didn't want him. Why? Why did Námo continue to deny him his heart's desire? All he wanted was to finally enter the Halls of Waiting so he would be reunited with his loved ones; with Celeborn and Remmen. He didn't want to remain on Arda alone!

"Hush now, Nana, all will be well eventually," soothed Collofin, hoping the old endearment would register with Thranduil. His husband had always thrown a fit when being addressed in that way. "You aren't alone. Legolas and I are here with you and we won't desert you. We will support you through the loss. We love you, remember?" He was stretched beside Thranduil, and had long ago wrapped his arms around his love. Thranduil's hair felt damp and the pale skin bathed in cold sweat, but Collofin didn't let that stop him and he leaned in to press a chaste kiss on Thranduil's brow. "Please wake up, meleth."

Thranduil didn't want to wake up. He wanted to lose himself in this nothingness, but the insistent voice wouldn't let him be. "Don't… want… to…"

Collofin's breath caught, hearing Thranduil's voice and realizing his beloved was finally waking up. He knew from personal experience that he had to be careful and gentle with Thranduil, who was suffering from a very severe shock. "Hush, meleth, I am here. You aren't alone. And Legolas will join us shortly." But he wanted a private word with Thranduil first.

Thranduil's eyes, which had closed during his healing sleep, now slowly opened and looked at the Elf who was holding him so tightly. Possessive arms held him close and he stared into incredibly familiar eyes. "Can't be."

"Believe it, meleth," said Collofin calmly. "I have returned to you."

Thranduil had a hard time accepting what his eyes were telling him. Tears formed when everything overwhelmed him and caused him to break down. He had lost Celeborn and his unborn child, which had utterly crushed him, but what shocked him even more was the fact that Remmen's soul had returned to him. "How… can this be?"

"I think I would need to question Námo to get the answers to that question. Unfortunately he never confided his plans to me." Collofin raised a hand and brushed a damp strand of Thranduil's hair behind a delicately pointed ear. "I remember my stay in the Halls of Waiting, and his promise that I would be reborn when the time was right. I must admit it never occurred to me that you could have taken a new lover. Had I known you were happy with Celeborn I would never have returned."

"Don't say that!" choked out Thranduil in a strained tone. "I need you! I need you now that… that I lost… lost…" Tears erupted from his eyes and he instinctively buried his face against Collofin's chest. "I lost… lost them…"

"I know you did, meleth, and I sense your pain." Collofin knew that the pain was still too fresh and too bitter to soothe with words and he settled for holding Thranduil, rubbing comforting circles onto the golden-haired Elf's back. "Just cry, meleth, acknowledge your pain. I am here to catch you now that you have fallen into shadow." He had learned a long time ago that it was best to let Thranduil do things in his own time. His beloved would tell him when he was ready to move on to the next stage of his grieving.

Thranduil wept quietly. His emotions were a chaotic mess. He felt terribly sad and lost because Celeborn had given his life for him, and then there was the loss of his unborn child, which wanted to make him scream out his pain at this injustice to the heavens. But then there was also joy at having been reunited with the love of his life; Remmen, or Collofin as he was called now. He was flung between these emotions ruthlessly, going from feeling ecstatic at one moment to being guilt-driven for feeling happy at having his greatest love back in his life. "I don't know… don't know how to do this… how to cope with this…"

"I won't say that I know what you are feeling, because I don't," started Collofin. "But I do know you feel confused, because I feel the same way. We don't have to make any decisions right now. All we have to do is lie here and comfort each other."

"But… the way I feel… All these mixed emotions." Thranduil moistened his lips and raised his gaze, looking into eyes he had thought he would never see again. "I feel guilty for being happy at finding you back at my side."

Collofin smiled in understanding. "You are entitled to feel the way you feel. If Celeborn really loved you, he would never begrudge you feeling some spark of hope amidst this immense loss and sorrow. Feel what you feel." Running his fingers through Thranduil's hair, he slowly rocked the other Elf. "Feel what you feel," he singsonged, "And all will be well. Your heart will guide you and guide you well."

Thranduil recognized the soothing quality, which his lover's voice had also possessed in the past and let it carry him away into a land filled with pleasant dreams.

"Yes, that's it. Sleep… Heal…" Collofin kissed the golden hair and gave Thranduil a concerned look. "Recovery will take time, but you are strong… so strong. You always were, meleth." Holding Thranduil tight, he guarded his beloved's dreams.

"Ada? How does he fare?" Legolas tiptoed closer, eager to catch a glimpse of Thranduil's face. Dried tears still clung to the long lashes and had left his father's face tear streaked. "He has wept," he whispered, taken aback.

Collofin signaled for Legolas to sit down on the side of the bed. "He lost his lover and his unborn child. He needs time to mourn." It didn't help that Thranduil felt guilty for having him at his side again. "I remember another time of mourning – when Oropher died. He briefly lost his sanity due to the grief." It had been his love and dedication that had pulled Thranduil through back then.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Legolas smoothed Thranduil's hair down his father's back. "I can't bear to see him like this."

"He needs time, pen-neth. And time is the one thing he has in surplus. First, he needs to properly mourn the losses he suffered."

"And you will stay here with him, Ada?" The fact that he had so easily and quickly accepted his father's return surprised him. But maybe it was the familiar expression in those eyes… or the sound of Collofin's voice, which were the same as Remmen's. It was easy to accept his return. So incredibly easy. It almost felt like Remmen had never left. He wondered if Thranduil would accept Remmen's return that easily as well.

Soft sobbing drew Collofin's attention and he instantly tightened his embrace, hugging Thranduil closer. He didn't offer his grieving lover any words of comfort, knowing Thranduil wouldn't really hear them. So he remained quiet, stroked the long hair and simply held him close, putting every ounce of his love into that embrace.

Hours later the sobbing began to fade away. Thranduil had buried his fingers in Collofin's tunic a long time ago, and clutched the fabric tightly to make sure his beloved couldn't leave. Moving weakly, he raised his head to meet Collofin's eyes.

"Would you like something to drink? A cup of hot, spiced, tea perhaps?" Collofin remembered that it had been Thranduil's favorite. "Maybe it will warm you from the inside."

Thranduil's pleading eyes locked on his lover's. "You… are still… here."

"I will stay at your side, meleth." Collofin graced Thranduil with a stunning smile and then made eye contact with Legolas, who had appeared in the doorway at hearing their voices. "Legolas? Your Nana is awake again."

"Don't…call me… that…" whispered Thranduil softly. "I am… not… a… Nana!" He tried to glare at his reborn beloved, but a tired smile formed instead.

"Ada?" Legolas carefully sat down on the side of the bed, and rested a hand on his father's shoulder. "You gave me a fright."

Thranduil managed to rest his hand atop of his son's. "I… need time…"

Legolas swallowed hard, and then nodded once. "We will remain at your side. I will get you your favorite tea in the meantime."

Thranduil nodded thankfully. "I would… love some."

Legolas forced himself to leave his father's side and exited the room, trusting Collofin to look after Thranduil.

Now that Legolas had gone, Thranduil closed his eyes, feeling fatigued and lost. Collofin respected that and continued to hold his love close. Words were redundant, he sensed Thranduil's pain and misery, and respected them.

Legolas returned, carrying a tray with cups and a hot, steaming pot of tea. After placing the tray onto the side table, he poured a cup, which he handed to Collofin instead of Thranduil, seeing the distant expression in the green eyes.

Collofin whispered a thank you and carefully placed the rim of the cup against Thranduil's lips. "Sip slowly."

Thranduil automatically obeyed, as he trusted his reborn lover unconditionally. So many things had happened these last few days! Slowly, his eyes focused again as the soothing, warm liquid flowed down his throat. It revived him somewhat and he grew more aware of Collofin and Legolas, who closely monitored him. Growing upset for worrying them, he gave them what he hoped was a warm, reassuring smile.

Collofin continued to stroke Thranduil's hair, wondering if the weakened Elf would be interested in taking a bath. Blood, left over from the surgery Elrond had performed, still clung to him. Or would his beloved prefer a sponge bath? How weak *was* Thranduil? He waited for the golden-haired Elf to finish his herbal tea and then asked his questions.

Thranduil gave Collofin a tired look. "Bath, definitely."

"I will let the pool fill," said Legolas quickly, grateful he could help. He disappeared into the bathroom and soon, running water could be heard filling the pool.

Thranduil's weary eyes met Collofin's, realizing he would shortly be confronted by the fact that he had truly lost his child. His abdomen was flat again and dried blood clung to his skin. "I can't do this alone."

"You don't have to." Collofin pushed back the sheet, revealing Thranduil's naked body and quickly lifted him in his arms. For one moment he felt overwhelmed – having his beloved in his arms again.

Thranduil briefly felt embarrassed for being lifted and taken care of as if he were still a child, but then recalled that this was his love – Remmen – and he had never felt ashamed of needing his support before. It was Remmen who had pulled him through when Oropher had died. He rested his head against Collofin's chest, trusting the other Elf to look after him.

Warm water, pleasantly scented with sandalwood, welcomed him a few moments later. His eyes closed and he released a contented sigh. Tender hands began to wash his hair and he surrendered to Collofin, who performed this task for him with old ease.

"Legolas? Fetch warm towels and a sleeping robe for you Nana." Collofin cast an amused look at Thranduil, who growled, softly, at being called that. /There is still fire left in you. We just need to nurture it./

Legolas intercepted Collofin's eyes and nodded once, thinking exactly the same thing.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 19

"I don't want to rest in that bed any more," said Thranduil in a surprisingly strong voice. He had shared that bed with Celeborn for too many years and it reminded him of Celeborn's absence. "I just can't."

Collofin nodded in understanding and then looked to Legolas to find a solution. "Is there a room we can use?"

"Follow me," said Legolas, opening the door as he looked over his shoulder at his parents. Thranduil was dressed in a soft, cream-colored silk sleeping robe and Collofin had wrapped a blanket around the recovering Elf before carrying him out of the bathroom.

Thranduil was content to let his beloved and son take care of him. He closed his eyes and fell asleep again.

"You are vile! You are tormenting him! Why? He has already lost so much!" Celeborn turned, faced Námo and gave him a poisonous look. "Why do you continue to hurt him?" He tried to stare the Vala into submission, but failed.

"And you aren't being truthful with yourself," said Námo, chiding him. "You felt hurt when you realized that Thranduil was delighted to have Remmen at his side again!"

"Of course I feel hurt! I died only two days ago!" Celeborn's rage mounted. "I spent the last five decades loving him and then he brushes me aside for Remmen!"

Námo drew in a deep breath; knowing this confrontation was going to be quite ugly. "He is mourning your death. Damn it, Celeborn! The love of his life returned to him after four millennia - the father of his son! His mate! And you are dead, accept that!"

Celeborn paced like a caged animal with bared teeth. "I died for him."

"That was *your* choice, never his. Don't put the blame on him! If you need to blame someone for your own decisions, blame me!" Námo mentally prepared himself for whatever emotional storm would follow. Celeborn was highly strung and extremely unpredictable. He had no idea what would happen next.

Celeborn moved suddenly – unexpectedly – and pounced on him. Strong hands grabbed his wrists, making sure he couldn't move. Námo held his breath in appreciation of that raw potential in Celeborn, which he had first seen millennia ago, but until now he had never had a chance to act on it. "Your pride is hurt because Thranduil still loves Remmen. You have been blind, don't you know that? His heart always belonged to Remmen. He never stopped carrying his beloved's portrait with him, nor did he ever truly stop mourning his death!" He knew exactly what words to use to trigger Celeborn's feelings. The silver-haired Elf didn't disappoint him.

Anger, hurt and need battled within Celeborn, and as Námo was the only one close he couldn't help take but it out on the Vala. Ancient instincts took over as he brutally claimed Námo's narrow, pale lips, eager to bruise and possess them. He would make the Vala pay for ruining his life!

Námo's eyes widened under the onslaught as Celeborn's emotions washed over him, and he reveled in them. It had been so long since he had last felt such intense feelings and he drank of them, taking them within himself and cherishing them. /You have no idea what you do to me, Celeborn./ But he couldn't give himself away. The moment he did, Celeborn would realize his intent and pull back. Biting down on Celeborn's bottom lip, he drew blood.

Celeborn growled, and his eyes widened. No longer in control of his actions – or his emotions – he pushed a knee between Námo's legs, forcing them apart. Awkwardly pinned against the wall, the Vala was now at his mercy – at least in his clouded mind he thought so.

Námo allowed this, as eager to carry on as Celeborn was. He surrendered, though he realized that in Celeborn's mind it was a forced surrender, which was just fine with him.

"You will pay for doing this to me – to him!" Celeborn's hands slipped beneath Námo's tunic, encountering surprisingly subtle and warm skin. Thoughts of Thranduil momentarily flitted through his mind and he briefly lost himself in that sweet sensation. Celeborn had always loved a challenge and Námo presented the ultimate one! Fingers slipped beneath the waistband of the Vala's leggings and he resolutely pushed them down, exposing Námo to him. To his utter surprise, the other was hard, and drops of pre-ejaculate glistened on the head of the hard flesh. "What?"

Námo surged against him, and pale blue eyes bored into his. The realization was sudden and devastating. "You used me too! You are still using me!" Celeborn's eyes widened in understanding. "You played each and every one of us! You knew exactly what you wanted – what you were after!" Celeborn growled, enraged, now that the truth had settled in. "You never cared about Thranduil or Remmen!"

"No, I did. I still do," whispered Námo, trying to regain his composure, but that wasn't easy as Celeborn suddenly curled his fingers around his throbbing erection, stroking hard and fast. "What are you doing?" Even though Celeborn's touch was rough and uncaring, it caused a spectacular effect in his groin and he instinctively thrust into Celeborn's hand, panting hard.

"It was *me* you were after!" Although Celeborn felt enraged at being played, a part of him couldn't help being flattered that the Vala had gone to such lengths to bring him here.

"It *is* you that I am after. It always has been you." Námo's eyes took on a deeper shade of blue and he leaned limply against Celeborn, who still had a tight hold on him. When the strokes picked up in speed and intensity, he threw back his head in surrender. "Please…" So long, it had been so long!

"No," said Celeborn sharply, releasing the hot flesh from his hand and stepping back, which caused Námo to slide down the wall, panting hard, looking flushed and utterly vulnerable. /And desirable,/ Celeborn had to admit. But he shook his head, trying to rid himself of that thought. Námo wasn't desirable. The Vala had cunningly manipulated him! "No, I won't play your games any more." Turning around, he left the hall, determined to get even with Námo for taking Thranduil away from him.

"No! Don't leave me like this! Don't you dare leave me!" Námo stared in shock after Celeborn's retreating back. "Come back and finish what you started!"

"No!" called out Celeborn, glaring at the disheveled Vala. "Finish it yourself!"

Námo's wide, blue eyes momentarily filled with an echo of tears. "Please come back," he whispered, barely audible. "Don't you know I love you? Don't you know you belong with me? Here, at my side? Helping me carry this burden and lighting up my life just a little? Do you know how lonely it is to dwell here – surrounded by death, longing and pain? You are strong, I know you are. I have watched you over the years. You could learn to love me… Please!" But Celeborn had long gone, and so had his arousal. "Don't leave me, please…"

Celeborn sat pressed deep into the comfort of a chair, refusing to look at Námo when the Vala hesitantly entered the room. "What you did was wrong!"

"Maybe," admitted Námo in a choked tone, carefully remaining standing near the doorway.

"Why?"

"I need you here," whispered Námo.

"Why?" Celeborn glared at the Vala. "Why did you do this?"

Námo carefully considered his options. "This always was about you. Not Thranduil." Seeing Celeborn raise an eyebrow, he continued, "I knew you would fall for Thranduil, but if you are truly honest with yourself, you will have to admit it never deepened into the profound love you had hoped for."

Celeborn considered Námo's words. He didn't want to admit it, but the Vala was right. "That doesn't give you the right to ruin our lives."

"Did I? Ruin your lives?" Námo inched closer, and a gleam returned to his eyes. "I returned Remmen to Thranduil and Legolas, and they have the chance to become truly happy again. But Thranduil still mourns losing you, and if you don't set him free, his guilt will devour the little happiness he has found again. I didn't ruin his life."

Celeborn bit his bottom lip, but remained silent and motionless, studying the other; and for the first time noticing the slumped shoulders and fatigue in the frost-blue eyes. "You ruined mine."

"Did I?" whispered Námo, still inching closer. "You tried to make the best of your love for Thranduil, but it wasn't meant to be. In your heart you know that."

"And that's why you tricked me into coming here?" Celeborn wanted the truth and nothing but the truth.

"I knew you wouldn't leave Thranduil willingly, and truth be told, the child was destined to die. Not even I can change such a fate. I saw my chance and used it. It was you who uttered the words, the offer. I merely accepted."

"You manipulated me into that position!" Celeborn jumped to his feet and glowered at the Vala.

"But you are here now," said Námo, wondering if Celeborn would ever forgive him. "You should make the best of it."

"The best… Don't you mean warm your bed and keep you 'satisfied'?" Unbidden, the memory of Námo melting against him returned and he swore he still felt an echo of the twitching, hot erection in his hand.

Námo held Celeborn's stare, never looking away. "I had hopes, but I had better let go of them now." He had made himself vulnerable, had hoped for understanding, but instead he had made one mistake after another. "I won't bother you any more, Celeborn, and I will grant you one last opportunity to speak with Thranduil. The next time he falls asleep you will be able to communicate with him. Use that last moment wisely."

"What do you mean – wisely?" Celeborn wasn't certain what to make of this offer and Námo's repentant attitude.

"I am giving you one last chance to talk to Thranduil. You can either ease his mind, let him go and give he and Remmen your blessing, or you can increase his guilt tenfold and make him miserable all his life. Thranduil tried to take his life so he could enter here before, so I advise caution."

Celeborn finally understood. "Are you saying that Thranduil might… take his life—"

"He did that once before when Remmen died. I don't know how he will react when you tell him the truth – that I tricked the three of you. His guilt would most probably consume him though. You might want to think this over before you act." Shamefaced at having allowed himself to be so vulnerable earlier, Námo straightened his clothes, turning on his heel to leave. "I won't seek you out any more. If you wish to talk to me, I will grant you that, but I will make myself scarce around you." He was drowning in melancholy and hurt, but refused to show it.

Celeborn's eyebrow arched questioningly. /What are your plans, Námo?/ He just knew he hadn't seen the last of the Vala when Námo disappeared into the corridor.

One hour later, Celeborn rose from the chair he had been sitting in. He had carefully thought over everything that Námo had said in regards to Thranduil and Remmen and he had made a decision. "I want to speak with Thranduil – now, Námo."

His surroundings faded and he found himself in one of the spare bedrooms, usually set aside for guests. He blinked once, never expecting the sight that greeted him. In the bed were three Elves. Collofin - whom he now knew was Remmen - Thranduil and Legolas. All three of them were hugging one another, providing warmth and closeness. Seeing them, holding each other in such an intimate, trusting way caused a lump of emotions in his throat and everything finally fell into place. Námo had tried to explain, had tried to show him, but the Vala had failed. But now that he saw this scene with his own two eyes, understanding slowly dawned.

This family had been reunited after millennia of pain and suffering. Even though Thranduil was hurt and still recovering, the gentlest of smiles had formed on his face, whilst holding Remmen close. The three of them seemed so right – so complete – that it unexpectedly brought tears to his eyes.

Had he been too hard on Námo for orchestrating this? Now that he saw the three of them reunited, he thought he understood why the Vala had done this. Yes, Thranduil had loved him, but sadness had always clung to the golden-haired Elf. More than once had he found Thranduil staring at Remmen's portrait, whispering softly.

He swallowed past the lump of emotions in his throat and moistened his lips. He had planned to tell Thranduil that Námo had tricked them, but he could no longer do that. Thranduil and Remmen did belong together. No, Thranduil, Collofin and Legolas belonged together. They were a family and shared a tight bond. He had only been a temporary lover and Thranduil had always treated him in the best possible way. The golden-haired Elf had even wanted to give him a child! Thranduil had loved him, but it was Remmen who held his heart.

Approaching the bed, he came to a standstill when he was closest to Thranduil. He hoped Námo's magic would ensure that Collofin and Legolas' continued to sleep, as he didn't want them to wake up.

"Thranduil? Would you please wake up?" He involuntarily held his breath when the green eyes gained awareness, and he instantly noticed that the emerald sparkle had returned to them. But then Thranduil's features contorted and tears flowed from the big eyes.

"Celeborn? I…" Thranduil trembled fiercely, realizing the predicament he was in, with Remmen tightly snuggled against him.

"It is all right," whispered Celeborn softly, smiling. "I understand."

"You do?" Confusion shone from Thranduil's eyes. "I don't. And I am sorry! I never wanted… You should have… And Remmen… No, Collofin… I don't love you less because of him… I…" Panicking, Thranduil's gaze shifted from Celeborn to Collofin. He prayed to the Valar that neither his beloved, nor his son would wake up. "You died," he whispered, upset, "Or didn't you?"

Celeborn pulled a chair closer to the bed and sat down. Needing to establish some sort of bodily contact, he curled his fingers around Thranduil's cold and clammy ones. Thranduil seemed to startle at the touch, probably realizing he was really here and not a vision. "Be at peace, my love. I mean you well."

Tremors coursed through Thranduil's body, unable to shake off his fear and panic yet. "I… am so sorry…"

"Why?"

"I feel… happy because… because Remmen returned to me… But I don't want to feel like that!" Thranduil was rambling now, afraid Celeborn would judge him and be cross with him. All rational thought quickly left. "I feel like I have betrayed you!"

Celeborn quickly soothed the upset Elf by rubbing the long fingers. "That's why I said that I understand. I do." Seeing Thranduil's puzzled expression, he carefully weighed his words, knowing he couldn't reveal everything he knew. "Remmen returning to your life at this point is a blessing – one I approve of. Don't feel guilty for loving him, for being happy to have him in your life again. I died for you so you could live and be happy. The best way for you to honor my sacrifice is to be happy and to live every day to the fullest." Thranduil's big eyes stared at him with barely concealed hope. "Oh, I do love you. I always have and I love you enough to set you free. Seeing the three of you like this, I know that this is right. You have my blessing, love."

Speechless, Thranduil looked at Celeborn. "I don't understand."

"But I do, my heart." Celeborn leaned in closer and pressed a kiss onto Thranduil's brow. "Promise me you won't drown in sorrow and guilt for what happened. Promise me you will live each day to the fullest, love Remmen and Legolas, and to occasionally think of me. Fondly, I hope."

Tears glistened in Thranduil's eyes. "How can you say that? I… I should have died, not you."

"Promise me, love. Promise me." Celeborn expectantly looked at Thranduil. "I want you to be happy and I know Remmen can make you happy. He did so before, didn't he?"

Thranduil nodded weakly. "Yes, he did."

"Then promise me." Celeborn squeezed Thranduil's hand reassuringly. "Promise!"

"I promise!" Thranduil yelped the words softly. "I promise," he repeated in a calmer voice. "If that is what you want, I promise."

"Thank you," whispered Celeborn, gracing Thranduil with a warm smile. "Be happy, love."

"And what about you? You are… dead." Thranduil cringed. "I never wanted you to die for me."

Celeborn's smile became wicked. "You don't need to worry about me, love. I have the feeling my death won't be boring at all." He grinned smugly. "Death might be very interesting and entertaining indeed." Maybe it was time to take control of the situation and play Námo in turn.

"Celeborn, I…" Thranduil still felt confused.

"Sleep now, love," whispered Celeborn, "Sleep and dream of happier days. Know that I don't blame you for anything. I am sorry you weren't allowed to keep our child, and you will need Remmen and Legolas' support to pull you through. Let them in. Let them love you. And remember me kindly." Brushing Thranduil's brow with his fingertips, his voice took on a hypnotic tone. "Sleep… Sleep now."

Thranduil's eyes filled with deep sleep, and he smiled contentedly.

"I was a fool," whispered Celeborn, "but I didn't understand that." He still didn't approve of Námo's tactics, but he now understood why the Vala had applied them.

His surroundings faded once more and he found himself in the Great Hall. His father, brother and friends welcomed him back and he let them fuss over him for a while. As he settled down in a comfortable chair, listening to his father's voice, his thoughts drifted back to Námo. Maybe he had been too judgmental. Maybe they needed to talk again. Scanning the Hall again, he realized that Námo had kept his word. The Vala was nowhere in sight; giving him his precious privacy. Frustrated, he realized another game had started in which he was the hunter and Námo the hunted. He grinned, realizing he was more than up for the chase.

Legolas was the first to wake to Arien's warm, caressing, rays. Regaining consciousness, the first thing he saw was Thranduil's tear-streaked face. Therefore he was surprised to also see a warm smile on his father's face at the same time. What had happened during Thranduil's sleep? Unwilling to wake his recovering father just yet; he carefully shook Collofin. "Ada?"

Collofin stirred and was about to stretch when he realized that Thranduil was still soundly asleep in his arms, so he remained motionless instead. "He is smiling through the tears," he whispered softly, realizing his unexpected arrival had caused part of Thranduil's emotional uproar. "I wish I had known of Námo's plans. I might have prevented the loss of his child"

"But you didn't," said Legolas, gently disentangling himself from them. "The two of you must be hungry. I will arrange for food and fresh water."

"Add a goblet of miruvor. Elrond brought some from Imladris, hoping the draught would strengthen him."

Legolas nodded once. "I will also inform Elrond that Thranduil is still asleep. Elrond will probably want to check on him."

Collofin understood. "And you should also inform Haldir."

"He is looking after our son at the moment." A thoughtful expression appeared in his eyes. "When the time is right I want to introduce you to Remmen."

Collofin smiled brilliantly. "I am honored that you named your firstborn after me."

"Ada didn't want me to at first, but he relented later." Legolas carefully rose from the bed and straightened his tunic. "I will return shortly with food."

"I will keep an eye on your Nana," promised Collofin.

"I… heard… that," muttered Thranduil, still half asleep. "Stop… calling me… that." He had accepted a long time ago that he would never be called that name again, but everything had changed now that Remmen was back. Opening his eyes - which had closed during his healing sleep - they focused on Collofin and the sight took his breath away. He was so grateful that Námo had returned his original form to his beloved. The Collofin he was now looking at was a perfect representation of Remmen. "Love… you," he whispered in a weakened voice, recalling the vision he'd had in which Celeborn had given them his blessing. "I love… you so much… More than life itself."

Realizing all was well, Legolas left the bedroom, eager to serve his parents some food. It had been hours since they had last eaten a bite and Thranduil needed to regain his strength. Entering the corridor, he nearly collided with Haldir and Remmen, who apparently were on their way to see him. Legolas hugged his son, and then gave Haldir a warm smile. "All is well."

Haldir sighed, relieved. "All is well with both of them?"

"Yes, and I am on my way to the kitchen to fetch them some food. Haldir, would you ask Elrond for some miruvor? And Remmen, will you join me on this errand?"

Remmen gave him a curious glance. "Can I see them?" He was greatly worried about his grandfather and extremely curious where Collofin was concerned.

"Yes, you may, but first we will head for the kitchen."

"I will arrange for the miruvor," promised Haldir and whilst Legolas and Remmen headed for the kitchen, Haldir sought out Elrond's guest room.

"I will come with you, Haldir. I want to see for myself how Thranduil is coping with these developments." Elrond, clad in a simple, gray tunic, took the lead and Haldir had no other option than to hurry after the Peredhel.

"Legolas said that Thranduil fares well. Having Remmen back in his life will make a difference in how Thranduil will deal with the loss."

"I need to see for myself," mumbled Elrond, now knocking on the door in order to announce their arrival. "It is I, Elrond."

"You may enter," said Collofin, who was still in bed with Thranduil, holding his beloved tightly.

Elrond immediately searched the green eyes as he sat down on the side of the bed. Thranduil was awake and hopefully also coherent. "How do you fare today, Thranduil?"

"I had a vision," whispered Thranduil. Hearing Collofin, Elrond and Haldir sharply draw in their breath he realized he had their full attention. "I dreamt of Celeborn. He told me he wanted me to be happy and love Collofin. I would honor his sacrifice in that way." His big, green eyes sought out Elrond. "Was my mind playing tricks on me? But he sounded so real. He even felt real!"

"I don't know, Thranduil," said Elrond in all honesty. "It might have been a dream; it might have been Celeborn's doing. Maybe Námo granted him this one chance to say goodbye to you." He carefully considered this matter. "I have known Celeborn for a very long time, much like you, Thranduil, and I dare say that he would want you to be happy."

Thranduil nodded once. "I feel the same way, but I still feel guilty for being alive whilst he is dead."

"Celeborn made his decision," said Haldir firmly, "No one forced him to trade places. It was something he wanted and did. You have to accept that."

"You need to concentrate on your recovery," said Collofin, pressing a chaste kiss onto the top of Thranduil's head. "Concentrate on the love that surrounds you and always remember Celeborn gave his life so you would live. It is only right to honor him by accepting what you have been given."

Elrond gave Collofin a long look. It was amazing how the young Elf had changed since meeting Thranduil. It was as if a part of his personality that had been hidden for all these years had finally emerged. Collofin seemed at peace for the first time. That lonely expression had faded from his eyes.

Thranduil's gaze shifted from Collofin to Haldir and finally came to rest upon Elrond. He moistened his lips, nervous to make a request and in the end, he lacked courage to speak the words.

But Elrond had seen and asked, "What is amiss, my friend?"

"I was wondering about something…" Uncertain how to phrase this, he began to pick at the fabric of his sleeve.

Collofin - recognizing Thranduil's nervousness - said, "You can speak freely. You know that. There is no reason to feel nervous."

Thranduil sighed deeply and then met Elrond's calm eyes. "I can't stay here. This place holds so many memories of Celeborn that I feel like I am choking in here. I expect him to enter the room at any given moment, or to call my name. I still sense his presence. Would you… Would you allow me to live in Imladris?"

Elrond smiled brilliantly. "But of course. I told you a long time ago that you are always welcome in the Last Homely House!" He rested a hand on top of Thranduil's experimentally. The weakened Elf was still experiencing the after effects of shock and needed to be treated gently and with consideration. "We will leave for Imladris the moment you feel rested and are fit to travel." Then he looked at Collofin, "And you will have a lot of explaining to do where Erestor and Glorfindel are concerned."

"I will explain this to them, and I am confident that they will understand," said Collofin, smiling fondly at Elrond. The he focused on Thranduil again. "You made a very wise decision, meleth." The idea had occurred to him as well, but he hadn't been certain if he should bring it up. "You will like Imladris."

Thranduil nodded, fatigued. "I am sleepy… But I don't want to go back to sleep." What if Celeborn was waiting for him in his dreams? And what if this time Celeborn wasn't that mellow?

"Losto, veleth. Beriathon in elei lîn." (Sleep, love. I will guard your dreams.) Collofin leaned in closer and claimed Thranduil's lips in a slow and long kiss.

Elrond cleared his throat and briefly averted his eyes. Haldir simply chuckled.

When Collofin finally released Thranduil's lips again, the golden-haired Elf's eyes had closed once more in sleep.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 20

Námo felt Celeborn's eyes upon him, but he ignored the silver-haired Elf. He'd had his chance with Celeborn and he had made one mistake after another. Although his heart ached, knowing the one he craved so close, he didn't approach Celeborn.

When he had first noticed the silver-haired Prince of Doriath millennia ago, he had felt the attraction instantly. But Celeborn had married Galadriel and later on he had chosen Thranduil as his mate. The Vala had realized a long time ago that he had no chance with Celeborn as long as the Elf was one of the living. His scheming had resulted in Celeborn's death and he had hoped he would now have a chance with his secret love. But he had to admit that what he had done was wrong. He couldn't force or manipulate Celeborn into returning his feelings.

Moving through the large Hall, he wondered why it was his fate to be alone. Although he was married to Vaire, there had never been any love between them. She was content to weave Arda's history into the tapestries that adorned his Halls of Waiting and the two of them barely spoke, doing so only when there was an urgent need for communication.

Another soul arrived, demanding his attention, and he moved toward it to capture it in a loving embrace. Once the soul had calmed down and accepted its fate, it manifested in the form it had possessed during life. Námo patiently guided and counseled it, until the soul was ready to join his loved ones, who already dwelt here. Once his task was done, he felt even more fatigued. Guiding, and calming these distressed souls took its toll on him, and as he scanned Arda for more dying Elves, he found none. Maybe he was finally being granted a moment of peace and quiet.

He was so lost in his thoughts and fatigued that he stopped monitoring Celeborn, never realizing the silver-haired Elf continued to follow him down the corridors.

Celeborn trailed after Námo for long minutes, wondering where the Vala was headed. When Námo finally left the corridor and entered another room, he cautiously followed. Looking about, he frowned, but then he realized just where he was. He had heard tales of this Hall when he was little. The elders had told him that in the vast caverns both Námo and his sister Nienna had their abode, but Vê was the name Námo had given his. His eyes widened, seeing Námo sit in a sable Hall. A Hall that was only lit with a single vessel, placed in the centre, wherein lay some few gleaming drops of the pale dew of Telporion. The Hall was draped with dark vapors and the tapestries of his wife, and the floors and columns were of jet. It was a gloomy place and Celeborn shuddered lightly, suddenly feeling like an intruder.

Námo leaned back into the comfort of his chair, and released a tormented sigh. His hands rose to meet his temples and the Vala impatiently massaged them.

It was then that Celeborn realized how tired and weary Námo looked. His shoulders had slumped forward and the Vala bowed his head as if in surrender, occasionally moaning softly. The large, pale blue eyes carried a hint of exhaustion, which almost caused Celeborn to reveal himself. The haunted eyes stared at the opposite wall and eventually Námo's breathing deepened, evening out. /He is asleep, resting./ Until now, Celeborn had never thought the Valar required sleep.

Stealthily, he sneaked closer until he was hidden behind the heavy tapestries. He now had a splendid view and could easily see the deep lines etched onto Námo's brow. He was surprised to notice that he felt some worry and he wondered why Námo had truly orchestrated his death. The Vala seemed lonely and exhausted. Was there another reason why Námo wanted him here?

Several hours later, Celeborn was still watching Námo, but he had left the confines of the tapestries and had taken a seat opposite the Vala. He wasn't certain if he wanted Námo to wake up, because he didn't know how to react to the Vala, but at the same time he wanted to address some matters. For starters, he wanted the truth.

Tremors moved through him. The Hall felt depressing, and as it was bereft of Arien's light and warmth, depression and gloom reined here supreme. His attention was drawn back to Námo when the Vala stirred. The eyes came back to life, and after blinking once, fastened on him.

Námo wanted to ask why Celeborn was here, but refrained from doing so. Instead, he pushed back his chair, rose, and put more distance between them. Making up his mind, he headed for the doorway.

"Wait."

Celeborn's order came as a surprise, and Námo froze in his movement. As his back was turned to Celeborn, he looked questioningly at the former Lord from over his shoulder. Still, he remained quiet.

"Please sit down again." This time, Celeborn phrased it as a request, and not as an order.

Námo was reluctant to comply, but eventually returned and remained standing behind his chair, using it as a barrier between them.

"I want the truth. Why did you bring me here?" Námo had hinted he had need for him here, but had never explained his words. It was obvious there was some attraction on the Vala's part; was it lust? Or was it more? How could it be more?

"That doesn't matter any more," whispered Námo, "You made it very clear that you are here against your will and I vowed to leave you alone. You shouldn't seek me out when I do my best to keep my distance." Melancholy, depression and a sense of intense loss had taken hold of Námo. These feelings had first appeared decades ago and he had fooled himself into hoping that Celeborn would be his guiding light in this darkness. Wasn't it ironic, he mused, that the Vala himself had become prey to those dark and depressing emotions that were usually reserved for the dead souls?

"I find myself curious. Humor me." Celeborn considered rising from his chair and standing close to Námo, but his instincts warned him that the other wouldn't allow him near at the moment.

"Then you will remain curious, for I won't enlighten you. And you will have to excuse me now. A new fëa is on its way to my Halls and I am already remiss in not guiding it here." And this fëa was young, so incredibly young. It would take most of his experience, cunning, and care to prepare it to be reunited with its loved ones. Not waiting for Celeborn to answer him, Námo left, leaving Celeborn seated alone in his lonely Hall.

Vexed, Celeborn cursed softly. Námo wasn't going to make this easy!

"Sip slowly," instructed Elrond, who watched closely as Collofin assisted Thranduil in drinking the miruvor that would hopefully further strengthen the recovering Elf.

Legolas, not bothering to knock before entering the room, quickly headed for the bed and placed the tray with food items on the side table. Behind him, Remmen entered quietly, hoping he wasn't intruding.

Thranduil's eyes lit with joy at seeing his grand son. "It has been too long, pen-neth. Come, sit with me." He patted the space on the bed next to him.

Remmen immediately complied and sat down. But his gaze was directed at Collofin and not his grand-father. "Are you…?" Unable to finish his question, he swallowed hard and gave the other Elf a hopeful look.

"Yes, I am the one once known as Remmen. Námo allowed me to return to my family. But in this life I am called Collofin." He smiled kindly, seeing Remmen's eyes widen. "You carry my name, pen-neth, it is yours."

Remmen smiled timidly. "My father told me many tales about you, including how you died protecting him."

"He would do the same thing for you, pen-neth," Collofin replied, giving Legolas a weak smile. "At the time, I had no choice, no time to think. The only thing that mattered to me was making certain my child remained alive." During his little speech he had felt Thranduil's hold on him tighten and he rubbed his beloved's knuckles in an effort to comfort him. "I returned, meleth," he said, reminding Thranduil, "And I won't leave you ever again."

Thranduil rested his head against Collofin's shoulder and briefly closed his eyes. /Námo, thank you for returning him to me./ He could only hope Námo had heard him and felt his sincerity.

Cradling the Elfling's fëa in his arms, and slowly helping it rebuild itself, Námo was surprised to receive Thranduil's thoughts. The gratitude that shone through the thoughts made him smile and gave him new strength. He had begun doubting himself and his recently made decisions, but knowing Thranduil felt this blissful at having Remmen at his side again, he knew he had done the right thing. If only Celeborn had understood. Had given him a single chance. But the silver-haired Elf had made himself very clear and he would leave Celeborn alone from this moment on.

The young soul suddenly clutched at him, and he reacted by soothing it, calming and cradling it. Lending it the strength it needed to continue its journey, he took it by the hand and reunited the Elfling's fëa with its loved ones. He watched a little longer to make sure everything was fine, and once he was confident that the soul had found its rightful place, he turned around and found himself facing Celeborn once more. The former Lord of the Golden Wood was staring questioningly at him and didn't step aside. In the end, he moved around Celeborn and finally left the Hall. He was tired; tired enough to lie down and never return to his depressing duty.

"What is troubling you, my son?" Galadhon sat down beside Celeborn, who was blankly staring into the fire. He had accepted his fate a long time ago and had found comfort here, among his friends and family, but he reckoned it would take his son more time to accept his death. He was determined to be patient with Celeborn.

"I don't understand him," said Celeborn, broodingly.

"Him," said Galadhon knowingly. "Námo."

Curiously, Celeborn raised his gaze and met his father's eyes. He was finally beginning to accept that he was dead and dwelt here. Even talking to his father was becoming easier. "What do you know?"

"I have seen the way he looks at you," said Galadhon slowly, pressing back into the comfort of his chair. "I will be honest with you, my son…"

"Yes?" Celeborn frowned, wondering what his father wanted to tell him. He knew Galadhon well enough to easily detect the rueful expression in his father's eyes.

"I have been here for quite some time," he started with a sorrowful grin. "When I arrived I was scared, and easily intimidated. I had heard tales about the Halls of Waiting and was afraid I would spend eternity in a horrific place. Then Námo came to me. He soothed me, talked to me and explained things to me. All that time his soul gently brushed against mine. He comforted me and I was able to make myself a place here."

Celeborn's frown deepened. "I have seen him welcome and take care of the new souls, but—"

Galadhon interrupted. "In that case you must also have seen his weariness. This fatigue that clings to him. His loneliness. When I first came here, a bright white light shone from deep inside him, warming us, but that light has faded to a dim gray." Galadhon considered his next words carefully. "He is one of the Valar, my son. He cannot die, but all the same he is suffering. He is wasting away. He has lost his inner light. I can't imagine the burden placed on him to counsel and care for us souls. And he is always alone. He can't come to us for comfort."

Celeborn studied his father closely. "So…?"

"I have seen the way he looks at you. A spark of that old, white light showed when he looked at you, talked to you, and we grew hopeful that you would strengthen him, restore him to his old form. But that spark of hope has left his eyes again." He leaned in closer and placed a hand on his son's shoulder. "I don't know what has passed between the two of you and I can't dictate your actions, but each soul here feels Námo's loneliness, his hunger, his exhaustion. We also sensed his interest in you and the brief return of that white light deep within him. I wept when it grew extinct again. We all did."

Only now did Celeborn become aware of the fact that he was at the center of everyone's attention. Countless eyes were fastened on him, hopefully, encouragingly. Even his brother was looking at him pleadingly. "Adar—"

"Listen, my son. Námo has a good heart. He takes care of us, and he brightens our existence just a little. He talks to us, comforts us, and occasionally allows us a glance into the world of the living to see if our loved ones are doing well. Without those things this would be a dark and miserable place. But should Námo succumb to his loneliness, grief and depression, then he will pull us all with him."

Celeborn drew in a deep breath, uncertain what to make of this information. "What should I do?"

"Námo craves your company – your attention. We all feel it. And yet that is the very thing you deny him. Again, I don't know what passed between the two of you, but we beg of you to try again."

Celeborn looked thoughtfully at the faces that surrounded him. Thousands of fëar were looking at him with an expression of hope. "I didn't know… I didn't know that he is struggling so hard."

"Imagine what eternity is like when you are surrounded by the dead, my son, perpetually alone. When it is your task to see to the souls of the ones that are mourning their loss of life. We are all indebted to him for taking care of us. He could have turned the other way, and ignored us, but he created this Hall for us, and several others, which resemble the life we left behind on Arda. He even went as far to create a beautiful garden for us, deep beneath the caverns. We are indebted to him, and you, my son, should feel honored that he has taken a liking to you." Galadhon paused, as his mouth had gone dry during his speech. "All we ask is that you try to make his existence less lonely. At one time or another, all of us desire a mate – a comrade to share the burdens of existence with. For some reason, he has chosen you."

Celeborn wasn't certain whether to feel honored or not, but his father's words had impressed him. "I will talk to Námo again."

Pleased, Galadhon nodded. "And try to see his worth, his strength of character – the real him."

"I will try," promised Celeborn, wondering what he had gotten himself into this time.

"You seem a little bit better," stated Collofin, pleased. Thranduil had taken another bath and this time the recovering Elf had been able to walk unaided, but he still required some help in getting dressed.

"I want to leave," Thranduil said determinedly, shivering minutely as he ran a hand over his flat abdomen. "I wish I had been allowed to keep the little one."

Collofin knelt in front of Thranduil, who was seated on a chair in front of the mirror. He had been combing and braiding the long, golden hair, but he released the plait to gather Thranduil's hands in his. "I am sorry for your loss," said Collofin, knowing he was broaching a painful subject, "But you also know why we never tried for a second child. Your brush with death was too close, too dangerous, when you had Legolas."

Thranduil remembered; Remmen had taken the decision out of his hands and it had been decided that there wouldn't be more children as Remmen was unwilling to risk his life again. "I have missed you so much!" Suddenly growing emotional, he freed his hands so he could wrap his arms around the other Elf. Pulling Collofin close, he buried his face in the red-golden mane. "Why did you leave me?"

Collofin had expected such an emotional outburst and was mentally prepared. Completing the embrace, he pulled Thranduil down onto the floor with him, where he rocked his beloved. "I am so sorry I left you, meleth. If I'd had a choice…" Knowing words meant little to Thranduil in this situation he rocked him, and sang a lullaby, which had always soothed Legolas in the past. He hoped it would work with Thranduil as well.

Minutes later, Thranduil stopped weeping and met Collofin's eyes with a rueful expression. "I… I need to… to leave this place… Please… Can't we depart right now?"

"You are still weak," protested Collofin, "I understand your desire to leave for Imladris, but—"

"I will do whatever you tell me," said Thranduil quickly, "I will rest, eat, and drink miruvor. I will even allow you to fuss over me without protesting… Please?"

Collofin sighed; he had never been able to deny Thranduil. "I will talk to Elrond. If he says you are fit enough to travel, we will. If not, you will have to be patient, meleth."

"Then call for Elrond so he can assess my condition." Bleary eyes met Collofin's gaze. "I can't stay here, my beloved. I can't. Everything reminds me of Celeborn, of our child… the immense loss."

Collofin nodded. "I will see what I can do. But first we need to talk to Elrond."

Elrond frowned deeply. "It is still too early. Thranduil, you should rest for a few more days." Although Thranduil had grown stronger, he was still a mere shadow of his former self.

"But can I ride, Elrond?" Thranduil knew he had to try to convince Elrond.

"I advise against it," repeated Elrond.

"But can I ride, damnit!" Thranduil was losing his patience. It was bad manners, but he *was* emotional!

"Yes, you can," said Elrond, giving in. "But I still advise against it."

Thranduil gave Collofin a triumphant look. "I can ride. We are leaving."

"But meleth—"

"No! Give the word so we can ride!" Thranduil pushed himself up onto his feet. "I can't stay here! Please…" he added the word in a tiny, pleading voice. He had possessed a spark of his old regal self a moment ago, but now seemed to collapse within himself. "Please, Remmen."

Collofin gave up all resistance, hearing Thranduil say his name in such a pleading way – his old, real name… the one his soul recognized. "I will make all necessary arrangements. Elrond, would you please stay with him and keep him calm?" /And sane?/ he added in thought.

Elrond understood perfectly. "I will sit with him." Watching Collofin leave the room, he placed one arm around Thranduil's waist, and assisted his patient in sitting down. Tears leaked from Thranduil's eyes and Elrond used the tip of his sleeve to gently wipe them away.

"I miss him," sobbed Thranduil, brokenly. "I miss Celeborn. I can't stay here! Can't. You understand, don't you? This place holds so many memories…"

Now that Thranduil's distress was mounting again, Elrond reacted in the same way he had when his children had been upset; he hugged the other Elf close, and whispered soft, comforting words. /I do hope Collofin returns quickly!/ Thranduil needed his beloved close.

They worked fast, preparing for immediate departure. Legolas had given Collofin a startled look at receiving word of their departure, but had then quickly complied, understanding Thranduil's need to leave this place where Celeborn and he had been happy. A change of environment was best if Thranduil and Collofin were to make a good, new start.

When Thranduil finally approached the horses, Legolas' heart missed a beat, finding his father still needed Elrond's support. Elrond and Collofin helped Thranduil into the saddle and then Collofin slipped into place behind the recovering Elf to make sure Thranduil wouldn't accidentally take a fall.

"We are ready to leave," announced Haldir, who had taken on the responsibility of leading and protecting this little group. He would make sure they reached Imladris safely.

Celeborn wandered the Halls for quite some time and he even visited the garden his father had mentioned. The moment he saw it, his soul seemed to reach for its warmth, gentle colors and lovely fragrances. Looking about, he saw an immense number of souls here. Some of them were lying on the grass, other leaned with their backs against the tree trunks and even more of them had made a new home in the tops of the tall trees.

/Námo created this for us…/ The thought that reached him originated from thousands of souls, each of them showing him how delighted they were to dwell here. /He maintains it for us, even adds to the garden; creating more trees, brighter flowers… he even returned to us the song of the birds./

Celeborn watched them a few more minutes, finally realizing the time and energy Námo had put into creating a new home for these souls. /But that still doesn't make it right for him to orchestrate my death!/

The souls remained quiet, but he sensed a great sorrow coming from them. Well, there was no use in postponing this. He had to talk to Námo.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 21

Námo had sensed the souls' uproar, but had ignored it. Even if he could, he never would force them to behave in a way that seemed most fitting to him. When he had realized they knew he desired Celeborn, he had been horrified to have let his emotions slip. Now, he made an effort to control them very tightly, but his Halls remained in an uproar.

He tried to smooth away the ripples of discomfort and unrest in his realm, but the souls wouldn't have it. They clung to their emotions and called him on his behavior. He briefly recoiled, realizing Celeborn was on his way to talk to him, encouraged by Galadhon and many other souls.

He had retreated to his private Hall with the intention of finding some rest here, but the hair at the back of his neck grew rigid, feeling Celeborn's eyes upon him. "I want you to return to the other souls. You have no business here."

Celeborn stepped into the Hall and immediately felt affected by the dark and gloomy atmosphere. /No wonder he feels drained and depressed./ Adapting the same posture, which he had displayed when acting in the capacity of the Lord of the Golden Wood, he proudly lifted his head and arched an eyebrow. "You are wrong. I *do* have business here."

Námo steeled his heart and turned to face Celeborn. "State your business and then leave. I desire some privacy before the next soul arrives and demands my attention!" He tried to appear proud and haughty, exactly the things he wasn't. But hopefully it would help put more emotional distance between them.

Celeborn approached, predatorily. His eyes narrowed, searching Námo's sky-blue ones. "My father talked to me. Apparently he felt it necessary to speak on your behalf."

The color of Námo's eyes changed unexpectedly. The blue seemed to fade and an icy white replaced it. "Galadhon means well, but he shouldn't have done that."

Celeborn now stood in front of Námo, and gazed deeply into the narrowed eyes. "They are all quite concerned about you, did you know that?"

"They are grateful," said Námo, correcting Celeborn. "Grateful, that I managed to create a more suitable environment. That has nothing to with me as a person."

"I don't know," said Celeborn honestly, now easily reading the lost expression in Námo's eyes. Slowly, he raised a hand and rested it on Námo's shoulder. "Will you sit with me so we can talk more comfortably?" He gently steered the shaken Vala toward his chair. After taking his seat opposite Námo, he leaned back and continued to study him. "Now tell me the truth. Why are you so determined to have me in your Halls?"

Námo's lips remained sealed.

Celeborn's eyebrow inched higher. "Either you tell me or I will repeat my father's words to remind you."

Námo shook his head. "This no longer concerns you."

"By the Val…" Celeborn shrugged his shoulders. "That is one habit I need to rid myself of." Leaning in closer, he hissed, "Why are you so stubborn? My father told me that you are lonely. That you are wasting away."

Something hard appeared in Námo's eyes as he pushed his chair away from Celeborn's. "As I said before, this doesn't concern you. Not any longer."

"Oh, that's what it is about! Me rejecting you!" He vividly remembered almost bringing Námo to orgasm and then turning his back on the Vala. Mumbling, he added, "I do owe you an apology for that. My temper got the better of me." Námo's expression weakened and encouraged Celeborn to continue. "Will you please tell me why you need me here?"

Námo felt inwardly torn. This wasn't the way he had pictured this moment in time. This wasn't the way he had wanted to tell Celeborn. He had hoped to have established a sense of trust between them first.

"What do you have to lose?" asked Celeborn, sounding extremely gentle and accepting.

"My dignity," whispered Námo, barely audible. He wasn't certain he could do this.

"Why don't I ask questions then?" suggested Celeborn. After seeing Námo nod reluctantly, he asked, "Are you lonely?" Another nod followed. "Did you bring me here for company?" Námo bit his bottom lip and then nodded again. "Why me?"

Námo realized he had to reply eventually. Postponing wouldn't do any good. "You are strong, Celeborn, intelligent, cunning, and pleasant company. You make people laugh. You love unconditionally. You died for the one you love, so you are also loyal."

Celeborn's eyes widened at the praise. "Continue."

"I have been alone for so long. There has never been any love between my wife and I. We seldom see one another and I greatly desire a mate. Someone, who is willing to share my life with me; my pain and my joy. I chose you millennia ago, but I also knew I didn't have the right to claim one of the living. I have watched you closely these last few millennia and I never wanted to cause your death. But when Thranduil became pregnant, I foresaw his death. I also knew you would offer me your life in his stead."

"And you accepted."

"I have wanted you at my side for so long," offered Námo apologetically, "that when the opportunity came I couldn't deny you – and myself." Unable to meet Celeborn's gaze any longer, he stared at the wall. "What your father said, is true. I am lonely and I feel like I am wasting away."

Celeborn considered everything Námo had told him. There was one more question he wanted answered. "Are there any feelings for me involved on your part?" Involuntarily, he held his breath.

Námo smiled, bitterly. "Do I love you?"

Celeborn nodded encouragingly. "Do you?"

"I thought I did," whispered Námo in a choked voice. Then he bowed his head. "Who am I trying to fool? I always did, and I still do. You radiate warmth and light; two things I crave."

Celeborn's heart contracted painfully at seeing the beautiful, normally proud Vala in this way. "What were your plans concerning me?"

Námo swallowed hard and moistened his lips. "I wanted to gain your trust and eventually your love. But there is little hope of that now. I will just have to manage in the same way I have done so far."

A terrible sadness invaded Celeborn's being. Recognizing it was Námo's sorrow he felt, he slowly gathered one of the Vala's hands in his. "What would my life be like as your… partner." Was that the right word? Was there a better one?

Námo's expression momentarily brightened. "Are you considering accepting this?"

"Maybe, tell me more," demanded Celeborn.

"I want someone to share everything with. My love, my desires, my pain – my burden. You would be my equal, Celeborn. I need someone to support me, to help me manage these souls. I can't keep up. I can't be alone any more."

Celeborn nodded in understanding. "And you love me?"

"Yes, I have loved you for so long. I love the wicked gleam in your eyes, your loyalty, and your protectiveness." Námo felt shy now that he had declared his love, and waited for Celeborn to either accept or reject him again.

Celeborn made his decision. "I accept."

Námo's eyes almost bulged from their sockets. "You…? You…? You do?"

Celeborn nodded; he didn't know why he had said yes. Hopefully he would discover in time.

Thranduil sagged against Collofin, delighted to feel the strong, long arms wrap around him tighter. Leaning into the comfort of the body behind him, he rested his head against Collofin's shoulder and tried to ignore the worried look Elrond gave him. Whenever he sighed, moaned, or made even the smallest sound several pairs of eyes focused on him. He constantly felt Legolas' eyes upon him, knowing his son was concerned about his weakened state. But he was confident he would grow strong again, now that he had Remmen at this side. The only thing that continued to worry him was the ease with which he was forgetting Celeborn's love. That wasn't right, was it?

"Why don't you try to sleep?" Collofin suggested, "It will be several days before we will reach Imladris. Why not make the best of it and rest?"

Knowing from former, personal, experience that his beloved was most stubborn when it came down to fussing over him, Thranduil gave in and slowly dozed off again.

They traveled at an easy pace, resting during the peak of the day and most of the night. Reaching Imladris took them longer this way, but made the journey much more comfortable for Thranduil, who continued to improve when he lay asleep in his lover's arms at night. The only thing that continued to worry them was the haunted look that appeared in Thranduil's eyes whenever Celeborn was mentioned.

Celeborn and Námo stared at one another, trying to figure out their next step. The souls that inhabited these Halls had grown quiet and awaited the next move with much anticipation. Celeborn had accepted, but awkwardness remained between them. In the end it was Celeborn who took the initiative. "You look tired." He hadn't thought it possible for one of the Valar to develop black circles beneath the eyes, but they were beginning to show below Námo's.

"I *am* tired," confirmed Námo with a deep sigh. "But I can't possibly rest. It won't be long before the next Elven soul will arrive."

Celeborn's thoughts raced. "I have an idea; will you listen and consider it with an open mind?"

Growing curious, Námo nodded. "What is it?"

"I have seen you talk to the new souls. I could take the next arrival under my wing whilst you sleep."

Námo didn't seem convinced. "Don't underestimate my task, Celeborn."

"I don't. I know how important your work here is, but at least let me try." Celeborn's expression was warm and hopeful when he looked into Námo's eyes. "You require rest."

Celeborn was right. He did need rest, but… "What if something goes amiss?"

"I ruled the Golden Wood for many millennia," said Celeborn, "I will manage here as well." Realizing they would still be discussing this in hours if he didn't take control of the situation now, he rose and covered the small distance between them. "Come with me." He extended his right hand, waiting for Námo to take it.

Putting his trust in Celeborn was easier than he had thought, considering Celeborn had rejected him in the beginning. He gingerly placed his hand in Celeborn's and then slowly rose from his chair.

"Let me do this for you. We can discuss this matter in depth after you are rested." Looking about, he wondered where the Vala normally lay down to rest.

"There is a room to the right," whispered Námo, steering Celeborn in the correct direction.

Now that he knew where they were headed, Celeborn took control again. Upon entering the room, he felt uncomfortable at the gloomy atmosphere that lingered here. He spied a few candles in the corner of the room, and he lit them, placing them all over the room so their hesitantly warm light softened the dark atmosphere. He returned to Námo's side and removed the heavy cloak that literally seemed to weigh the Vala down. Next, he undid the laces of the gray leggings and unbuttoned the shirt, ignoring Námo's inquisitive look when he allowed the garments to slip onto the floor. "Sit down," he instructed in a gentle tone and to his surprise, the mighty Vala obeyed.

Kneeling, he removed the boots and then lifted Námo's legs onto the bed. He rose from the floor to sit on the side of the bed and their gazes met. Only clad in a loincloth, Námo appeared very vulnerable to him and he felt guilty for the way he had left the Vala earlier – aroused and needy. There was no sign of arousal now, only a tired expression in the blue eyes and a look of surrender on the face. Although it was completely unnecessary as they didn't feel cold or warmth, he still covered Námo with a blanket, tucking the fabric around the trembling body.

"It has been centuries since I last…" Námo's voice failed him, and he hoped Celeborn understood at any rate.

"Since you last rested in this manner," finished Celeborn for him. "But what happens if a soul arrives? Will its arrival cause you to awaken?"

Námo nodded once. "Someone has to see to it."

Celeborn drew in a deep breath to emotionally steady himself and then asked, "Do you trust me?"

Námo never hesitated. "I do."

"Then let me guard your sleep so you won't wake before you are satisfactorily rested."

Námo swallowed hard at that request. In complying he would temporarily hand over command to Celeborn and the silver-haired Elf hadn't been here long enough to know all tasks involved. But he was so tired… so sleepy.

"I thought you trusted me," said Celeborn gently, seeing the conflict in the other's eyes. "I won't betray your trust."

In the end, Námo nodded his permission. "You will decide when I will wake up again." Giving Celeborn the ability to guard his sleep frightened him, but this was what he had always wanted; an equal to help him carry his burden.

"Sleep then," whispered Celeborn in a soothing tone, reaching out to stroke the long white hair, with weak blue streaks mixed in and he now also encountered a few mithril-colored strands. The blue eyes closed in sleep. "You must be utterly exhausted."

"My Lord Námo?"

Celeborn looked up at hearing a familiar voice. "Oropher?" Rising from the bed, he turned and looked at the former King. Thranduil had always loved his father and talked about him most fondly. Celeborn hoped that Oropher had worked through his death at the Battle of the Last Alliance and would help him run these Halls.

Oropher's eyes narrowed, recognizing Celeborn. He had heard of the other's arrival, and had listened quietly when the souls had encouraged Celeborn and Námo to talk. /He died so my son could live. I am indebted to him. Whatever feelings I had in the past shouldn't matter. I *owe* him./

"My good friend," said Celeborn, hoping Oropher understood and would reply in a similar fashion. "I am so glad to see you. I require your help."

Oropher's sea-blue eyes fastened on Námo – who was obviously asleep. "Yes, you were right. He needs the rest." Námo had grown more silent and distant throughout the years and it was good to see him finally peacefully asleep.

"And that is why I need your help," said Celeborn, who felt grateful now that Oropher seemed willing to cooperate. "Could you please gather Amroth, Turgon, Fingolfin, Finwë, Elwë, Finrod, Finarfin, Ereinion, Ecthelion, my father, and others who have experience in ruling a realm?" Námo had kept these Halls running by himself instead of soliciting the help of others.

"I always told him he needed assistants to lighten his workload, but he never listened." Oropher nodded once. "I will gather them."

"Thank you." Celeborn watched Oropher turn around and expected the other Elf to leave, but Oropher surprised him by looking over his shoulder.

"You have my eternal gratitude for keeping my child alive. You gave your life so Thranduil would live. I will never forget what you did for him."

"Thank you," whispered Celeborn again, this time in a soft, and caring tone. "I loved him."

"Yes, you did." Oropher chuckled inwardly. /And now you are falling for Námo, just as we had hoped you would./

Celeborn's gaze shifted from one soul to another. They had all come. Finwë had taken the seat at the other end of the long table and was closely monitoring him. Celeborn cleared his throat and then started, "I have called you here for a reason. Lord Námo offered me the position of his… " Celeborn paused, considering, "right hand, and I am determined to make some changes here. He has been doing everything on his own and the workload has become too much for him. It is time we help in our own way. Everyone here has some experience in running a kingdom and we will look upon these halls as a realm from now on. We need to take on some responsibility. We need to help where we can."

Ereinion nodded. "We told Námo so before, but he is stubborn and never listens. We already discussed this matter amongst ourselves and came up with several solutions. We will help when and where we can."

Galadhon looked his son in the eye. "Some of the new souls tend to be severely distraught and in those cases we will still require Námo's help. No one else can soothe them like he can."

"He will be there," said Celeborn, reassuring them. "But for now he will rest. Should there be any new arrivals, I will see to them personally."

The gathered leaders nodded their consent. "We will help," said Finrod, looking from one face to the other. "We offered our help in the past, but Námo always refused – politely, but he still refused."

"He didn't want to burden us," added Fingolfin, whose compassionate eyes had never left Celeborn's form. "Therefore we are truly grateful that you have arrived at last."

Celeborn nodded determinedly. "I will take care of him as long as he needs someone to do so."

Galadhon leaned in closer and placed his hand atop his son's. "He is one of the Valar, my son, never forget that. His power exceeds yours by far. He is our master here."

"But a kind master," said Ereinion, "One who is also in need of love. A mate."

Celeborn was reminded of his own words at hearing Ereinion's. /I accept,/ he had said. Now he wondered what position he had accepted, exactly.

Thankfully, the one Elven fëa that arrived was old and accepting of its death, and Celeborn and Turgon looked after it. The soul easily accepted being reunited with its lost loved ones and quickly settled down.

Whilst Turgon remained alert in case more souls followed, Celeborn returned to Námo's private rooms, once more despairing at the broody atmosphere within these walls. Concentrating on the sleeping form in the bed, he sat down on the side, studying Námo extensively. The Vala was beautiful. /And he wants me – loves me./ But everything was happening so fast! He had lost Thranduil and their child and now he had consented to be Námo's… What? Consort? /Consort?/ The thought made him chuckle.

Concentrating on Námo again, he smiled. Although the Vala had only rested for a few hours – at least he thought that only a few hours had passed. But no one could tell as time seemed to have frozen in these Halls – Námo already seemed improved. The dark circles beneath those wonderful eyes had faded and a weak smile had formed on the Vala's face. Celeborn tried to imagine what kind of existence Námo led – what kind of 'life' he had here – and quickly understood how terribly lonely he had to be. The anger he had felt at being manipulated lessened.

Being truthful with himself, he admitted that he had never managed the same depth of love with Thranduil, as the former Woodland King had had with Remmen. Maybe here was where his destiny lay after all. Maybe he was fated to be with Námo instead. There was only one way to find out. Bowing forward, his lips brushed Námo's, whilst whispering, "Wake up, my Lord."

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 22

The sensation he woke up to was most pleasant; soft, pliant, warm lips kissed his with a strong sense of curiosity and possessiveness. Slowly regaining awareness, Námo opened his eyes and stared at the source of this warmth that now slowly invaded his being. Celeborn's inquisitive eyes were fastened on him and those lips… Those lips did magnificent things to him. He followed where Celeborn led him, hungry for more new sensations.

Celeborn wondered about Námo's unskilled kiss. Námo tried to return the kiss and to deepen it, but it was obvious that the Vala hadn't done much kissing in his long existence. That thought saddened him and Celeborn did his utmost best to satisfy the other's need and curiosity. Demonstrating his considerable skills, he kissed Námo breathless.

Námo's toes curled and breathing became increasingly difficult. The kiss completely enraptured him and Námo let Celeborn set their pace. Moaning into the Elf's mouth, he hungrily wished for more, burying his fingers in the long, silver mane.

Although he had no reason to be surprised by Námo's passionate reaction, he was still astonished to see the Vala this eager – this hungry. Indulging him, Celeborn continued kissing him, occasionally slipping in a lighter kiss and some nibbling at Námo's bottom lip. Big, sparkling blue eyes met his in rapture.

Námo smiled, feeling truly warm on the inside after their kissing. Although he wanted to do a lot more than just kissing, he controlled his desires tightly, knowing that he should let Celeborn set their pace. "Thank you for that."

"For the kissing?" Celeborn smiled smugly. "I enjoyed it as much as you did." Which was the truth. Námo's lips were silken and very soft – perfect for a long kissing session. Words wouldn't easily come to him, seeing the soft expression in the warm, blue eyes. Why had he ever thought them frost-blue? They resembled a warm summer sky, cloudless and radiant with sun. "I must apologize again for my behavior earlier. Leaving you in such a flushed state was hardly appropriate." One hand traveled up Námo's chest and came to rest on the back of the Vala's neck, whilst the other went downward, beneath the blanket, and eventually below the loincloth. "Let me apologize properly."

Námo's breath caught, as Celeborn's fingers curled around his hardening flesh. He had never craved anyone, anything, like he craved Celeborn and he willingly surrendered to the bruising kiss, and the demanding fingers. Arching toward Celeborn, he threw back his head, allowing the silver-haired Elf to utterly possess his mouth. A fire, which he had never known before, spread through his groin, and before he knew it, he was thrusting needily. "Please…" He wasn't beyond begging at this point, having wanted this for so long.

Hearing Námo beg for release deeply touched Celeborn's heart. He had never thought one of the Valar would do so. "But of course." Closing his lips over Námo's bruised ones, he deepened the kiss, suckling the tip of the other's tongue, increasing the speed and intensity of his strokes. Námo unexpectedly trembled beneath him, moaned from deep within his throat, tensed, and went limp when hot cream erupted from the slit. Celeborn grinned predatorily and held Námo close, uncaring that the cream now dripped onto his leggings as well. They could slip into clean clothes later. The changed expression in Námo's eyes baffled him. They were open, warm and illuminated from within. "I reckon you feel better now?" he said teasingly, trying to do away with any discomfort or nervousness between them.

"I do," whispered Námo; a slight catch could be heard in his voice. "You have no idea what you do to me."

Gazing deeply into the dark, blue eyes, Celeborn said, "I am beginning to understand." He was also realizing that he was developing certain feelings for the Vala, which surprised him. But Námo was beautiful – had been magnificent in his need and surrender. "You should clean yourself up and maybe you have a spare set of clothes for me too? I do believe you made a mess."

Námo blushed at what had occurred just now. "I…" Speechless, he ran a finger over his bruised lips. He had known he had picked Celeborn for a reason! The Doriath Elf was passionate and loyal. "Thank you for that." Then another thought occurred to him. Shouldn't he return the favor?

Celeborn easily read Námo's expression. "No, you don't have to. And we don't have the time at any rate. I am certain you want to inspect your Halls to see if I did a good job whilst you were asleep." Although he was aroused as well, he felt it was still too early for Námo to take this step. If he read the Vala right – and he was certain he did – then this beautiful being had never before had a male lover. This had been a big step for Námo. /He is nothing like I thought he would be./

Placing his hand on Námo's, he gently pulled the Vala to his feet. "Take a bath, my Lord. Allow yourself some luxury. I will be in here, waiting for you." He had to keep in mind that Námo was a Vala, a very powerful being, no one to trifle with.

Námo nodded once, and then raised his right hand to gently caress Celeborn's face. "I always knew you would make a good mate." With a hint of his blush still intact, he reluctantly turned away from Celeborn and headed for the bathroom.

His skin tingled where Námo's fingertips had made contact with it and Celeborn felt afloat on a thousands clouds, mentally replaying Námo's words. Oh, this wasn't really happening, was it? This couldn't possibly *be* happening, or was it? Oh, he was definitely in trouble now, falling in love with the Doomsman of the Valar. When had that happened?

Celeborn shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts, but Námo's face remained prominent in his thoughts and his heart continued to thump madly with desire.

When Námo reemerged, he was dressed in luxurious cream robes, lined with soft, beige fur. His long white hair danced loose against his shoulders and the small of his back. A circlet, depicting stars and snowflakes graced his brow. The blue eyes still carried a hint of the warmth the orbs had possessed when the Vala had found release only moments ago. He felt rested and very much in love with Celeborn, an emotion, which he could no longer hide. "Will you accompany me? I need to make certain that everything is all right in my Halls."

Celeborn nodded and then fell into step beside the Vala. "I enlisted some help whilst you were asleep and discovered that we can deal with the older and more accepting souls ourselves. It is the young ones that fight death."

Námo understood. "They feel robbed of their life and often rightly so." He recalled the multitude of souls that had arrived when the Elves had helped defend Helm's Deep. Once he had comforted them and taken them to their rightful place, he had felt utterly exhausted. The pain and sorrow that the souls had radiated had depressed him and he hoped that there would never be such an invasion of his Halls again. "So how did you manage?" A quick, mental sweep told him that everything was in order in his Halls and that the souls were relatively happy.

"Turgon and I took care of the new arrivals, whilst the other Kings of old made sure the already settled souls were comfortable." Celeborn arched an eyebrow. "They are all most eager to help, my Lord. If I may say so, they like you. They care about your well-being."

"Which surprises you?"

Celeborn decided to be completely honest. "It does. I never thought the dead would care for their Lord and Master."

"I don't care much about titles, Celeborn," said Námo gruffly. "All that matters to me is that these souls are relatively happy whilst they are waiting to be reborn."

"How do you decide who is reborn?" asked Celeborn curiously, finding Námo was now heading for the main hall, which was assuredly crowded with souls, his father and brother doubtlessly among them.

"Their love decides for them."

Celeborn raised an eyebrow. "Their love?"

"Glorfindel, for example, had a great love for life, and for Arda itself, and his heart remained there whilst his soul traveled here," explained the Vala patiently.

"And Remmen loved Thranduil even in death."

"Remmen's love is extra-ordinary. I have seldom encountered such love before and he deserved to be reborn." Námo moistened his pale lips. "There is something I would like to discuss with you. Let us sit in the corner." Námo regularly inclined his head in greeting or acknowledgement when several souls approached him. Guiding Celeborn to a pair of chairs in front of the fire place, he sat down first. He sensed the souls' delight at seeing him together with Celeborn. He really had been careless, letting his emotions slip earlier.

"What is it that you wish to discuss?" Celeborn settled down opposite Námo, puzzled at seeing a restless expression in the blue eyes.

"Thranduil - and his reaction to your death." Námo gathered his robes close and pushed deeper into the comfort of his chair.

Celeborn sighed. "What was his reaction like, then?"

"He still blames himself for your demise. Although you told him that it wasn't his fault and that you set him free, he is afraid to believe so. He thinks it was nothing but a dream."

Celeborn flinched. "I was afraid that might happen." And Námo had only given him one chance to say his goodbyes!

Námo caught that thought. "It would be wise if you talked to him again. Now that Remmen has returned to his side, I don't want him to waste away because he feels guilty about your death."

"You will allow me to talk to him again?" Hope flared in Celeborn's heart.

Námo inclined his head. "It would be best if I talked to him as well, as he thinks you a vision. We will talk to him together."

Celeborn approved of that idea. "That would be best." It had taken him a while to understand that Námo had Thranduil's best interest in mind, but that fact had finally registered with him. Smiling weakly at Námo, he hoped the Vala forgave him his earlier temper tantrums. He would try to keep in control from now on.

"Listen to me, Thranduil. Hear me… See me." Námo had waited for Thranduil to head for the small stream the party had encountered earlier, and now that the former King was alone, he judged the time right to reveal himself and Celeborn.

Celeborn bit his bottom lip, seeing the startled – almost frightened – expression in the emerald eyes. "Be at ease, Thranduil. We mean you no harm."

"But… but you're dead!" Thranduil's eyes had widened and he trembled fiercely. Leaning against the trunk of a tree for support, he stared at the apparitions in front of him. He knew both of them only too well.

Námo nodded his head once. "Yes, you know me. I denied you entry to my Halls many millennia ago. It wasn't your time, Thranduil."

Thranduil's shivering intensified. "Have you finally come for me, my Lord? Why now? Now that I finally have Remmen at my side again?" Realizing what he had just said, he looked pleadingly at Celeborn. "I am sorry! I didn't mean for it to sound like that!"

Celeborn advanced on his former lover. Uncertain if he could touch Thranduil, he slowly raised his hand and he smiled tenderly when his fingertips encountered warm flesh. "I know you love me, Thranduil, but I also know that you love Remmen more and that you never stopped loving him. On many an evening I found you staring at his portrait and whispering his name. You have my blessing, my love."

"But… you died for me! If I were you I would be angry – very angry with me." Thranduil stared pleadingly into Celeborn's eyes once again. "I would understand if you hate me."

"Hate you? I could never possibly hate you!" Celeborn shook his head. "I told you before that I want you to be happy with Remmen, but you didn't believe me."

"I thought you were a dream – a vision," explained Thranduil, still staring at the Vala and his dead lover. "Is this real, then?"

"Very real," replied Námo, as he walked up to the shaken Elf. "You know me and you know that I don't lie."

"That's true," whispered Thranduil, feeling hypnotized as he looked into Námo's pale blue eyes. "You never lied to me."

Encouraged, Námo continued, "Your time of happiness has finally come, my child. Why allow this pain and guilt to linger when you can be happy again? Celeborn just gave you his blessing. Please accept it."

"But…" Thranduil looked longingly at Celeborn. "How can I be happy when you are not?"

"Who says I am not happy?" Celeborn gave Thranduil a wink. "It might take me some time to get used to being dead, but so far life – uh, death – isn't unpleasant at all."

"My Lords?" Collofin had needed a moment to compose himself when he happened upon Celeborn and Námo. The presence of the Vala of Death worried him and he wrapped an arm around Thranduil's waist protectively. Now that they had finally been reunited, he wasn't going to allow Námo to separate them ever again!

Námo sensed Collofin's unease and quickly reassured him. "You left my Halls, Remmen, and I hope you won't enter again for a very long time. We are here to soothe Thranduil and to convince him that he isn't to blame for Celeborn's death."

Looking to Thranduil, Collofin nodded. "Lord Námo speaks the truth; you aren't to blame."

Thranduil's eyes sought out Celeborn's once more, needing to be reassured again.

"You aren't to blame. I made my choice." Celeborn smiled, leaned in closer and pressed a chaste kiss onto the golden-haired Elf's lips. "You aren't to blame, Thranduil. I made the bargain and I am happy with the outcome."

Collofin listened up. "You are happy with the outcome?" What did that mean?

"It means I have the feeling I will enjoy my new home… and its Lord." Celeborn gave Námo a cheeky grin, claimed the Vala's hand and pressed a quick kiss onto a knuckle. "You see, Lord Námo and I have reached a certain agreement."

"An agreement?" Thranduil leaned closer against Collofin, needing the physical connection.

"I am his consort," said Celeborn, purring.

"Consort?" echoed Thranduil and Collofin simultaneously.

"Yes, that is why I can set you free so easily," said Celeborn, addressing Thranduil. "You have found love with Collofin, and I am attracted to Námo. So relish your time with Collofin and live each day to the fullest."

The words now came easier to Thranduil. "I promise."

Back in the Halls of Waiting, Celeborn fell into step beside Námo. Looking at the Vala, he found Námo in deep thought. Was Námo thinking about Thranduil and Remmen as well?"

"Do you resent me for bringing them together again?"

Námo's question surprised Celeborn, but then he recalled his initial reaction when he had found out. "Resent you? No, I don't resent you. I didn't understand why you did this at first, but I gained more insight. I understand now."

Námo released a relieved sigh. "Good." It meant a lot to him that the former Lord understood why he had done this. "Do you then resent me for accepting your offer and bringing you here, into my Halls?"

"My Lord?" Celeborn grabbed hold of Námo's right hand. He halted in his movement and Námo was forced to stop walking as well. "I don't resent you. I like you. I like you more than I originally thought. My death was a shock and learning about your manipulation worried me. But I don't resent you. I *like* you!"

Encouraged by the fire in Celeborn's monologue, Námo leaned in closer, pulled the silver-haired Elf toward him and passionately claimed his lips. Bringing his arms up behind Celeborn's back, he hungrily explored the Elf's mouth. The close contact caused him to grow hard and he involuntarily thrust against him.

Celeborn's breath caught, seeing Námo's pupils dilate and the soft, blue irises darken. Námo puzzled him. Námo's *reactions* puzzled him and he had to ask – had to know. "You are so hungry, so eager… My Lord, may I inquire when you were last together with a lover?"

Námo suddenly pulled away, radiating unease at hearing Celeborn's questions. "With a male? Never." He averted his eyes, unwilling to see the expression in Celeborn's.

"Never?" Celeborn's eyes nearly bulged from their sockets. "I am your first?"

"It is different for me, Celeborn," said Námo hesitantly, "For us, Valar. Normally, we don't feel such… physical attraction."

"Lust," said Celeborn, "You mean lust." But his mind still reeled from Námo's admission. /Never before?/ "So what you are trying to say is that this is an exception? This attraction?"

"Yes, this has never occurred before."

"And what does your dear wife say about this?" Celeborn hoped he wasn't overstepping boundaries.

"My wife has no interest in my *carnal* pleasures. As I said before, we seldom talk."

"That must be a very lonely marriage, my Lord." Celeborn slowly understood the Vala's loneliness and why Námo needed a mate. "So she isn't opposed to this…" How to call this? "Liaison?"

"It is hardly of any interest to her," said Námo in a saddened voice. He managed a weak smile when Celeborn's arm folded around him and he leaned into the touch. "I am glad you are here – at my side."

"And so am I." Those were words Celeborn had never thought he would say, but things had changed.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 23

Magolion grew worried and excited, seeing the small party approach Imladris. His sharp, Elven vision quickly made out the Elves' identities and he quickly climbed down, as he had been sitting in the top of an old tree, listening to the song of the birds and idly watching the clouds drift by. His feet hit solid ground once more and he felt briefly torn inwardly. What was he supposed to do? Hurry back to the Last Homely House to inform his mate and friends? Or welcome the party? In the end, the group had come rather close to him and he decided to welcome them home.

"Mae govannen!" He walked toward them, waving at them. "We didn't expect you to return this quickly, Lord Elrond." Although Elrond had told him to stop addressing him in such a formal manner, the habit occasionally slipped back in. His gaze shifted from Elrond to Legolas and Haldir. Next to them rode a young Elf, who bore a remarkable resemblance to Legolas. /That must be Remmen./ The last time he had seen Remmen was when he had been a toddler, and it had been many years since then. Last, his gaze came to rest on Collofin, who held Thranduil tightly in his arms. One of Magolion's eyebrows arched questioningly.

"I have much to tell you," said Elrond, taking the lead, "But that will have to wait. Please run ahead to the Last Homely House to inform them of our imminent arrival and tell the servants to ready guest rooms."

"No guest room for Thranduil," decreed Collofin, "He will stay with me."

Elrond smiled sweetly, wondering what Erestor and Glorfindel had to say about that.

"Lindir…! Where is Lindir…? Elrohir? Erestor… where are they?" Panting hard because he had run all the way here, Magolion grabbed hold of his brother, who was giving him a worried look.

"What happened, Magolion? Did you step onto a leftover, poisoned Orc arrow and did develop a fever?" Erestor had seldom seen Magolion so flushed and this excited.

"They are back!" He paused, trying to catch his breath. "Elrond, and the others, they are back!"

Erestor's eyes narrowed. "Are they injured? Were they attacked?" The party wasn't supposed to return for quite some time!

"They are fine… Except for Thranduil, who looks exhausted." Magolion drew in a deep breath and then called out again for his friends. "Lindir! Get over here! And Elrohir, your father has returned!"

Erestor suddenly realized something worrisome. "What about my son, Magolion? What about Collofin?" Elrond and Collofin had been traveling together, but so far his brother hadn't mentioned him!

"Collofin is fine too. Stop worrying, Erestor." Magolion smiled warmly at his brother and teasingly elbowed him in his side. "They will be here in a few minutes. Elrond told me to ready guestrooms." He decided not to mention Collofin's rather bold statement that Thranduil was to stay with him.

Erestor called a servant closer and issued all necessary instructions. "Guestrooms for whom?" he said, turning to Magolion for an answer.

"Legolas, Haldir, and their son, Remmen. Oh, and Thranduil, of course." In the distance, Magolion already made out the party's faint silhouette. "And you might want to fetch Glorfindel."

Erestor shook his head at this confusing information. But the servant had understood and now hurried away to carry out his instructions, whilst Erestor ran back into the Last Homely House to find his mate.

"What is it?" Elrohir, having heard Magolion call him, rounded around the corner and came to a halt in front of his husband. Behind him was Lindir, who was panting softly, wide eyes staring inquisitively at Magolion.

"They are back!" Magolion raised a hand to point them in the right direction.

Lindir looked up and released a yelp, finding Elrond riding up front. Not giving his actions a second thought, he broke out into a run. "Elrond! Beloved!"

Elrond jumped from the horse's back, opened his arms and caught Lindir in them. A passionate kiss locked their lips and a soft sigh escaped both of them.

Elrohir chuckled softly and he reached for Magolion, folding an arm around the warrior. He was extremely happy to have his father back, but his gaze shifted to the rest of the party, easily identifying the weary expression on Thranduil's face.

"Collofin!" Glorfindel exited the Last Homely House first and ran toward his son, with Erestor in hot pursuit.

"Go to them," whispered Thranduil, still feeling rather tired.

"Won't you fall without my support?"

"I will manage." Thranduil clung to the saddle when Collofin dismounted. He watched detachedly how Glorfindel caught Collofin in his arms, pressing the younger Elf close. A moment later Erestor joined them and the dark-haired advisor attempted to bury both of them in a hug simultaneously. He thanked Námo for giving his love such caring and devoted parents. Erestor and Glorfindel had done an excellent job in raising Collofin.

"Let me look at you!" Glorfindel pulled away from his son and studied Collofin. A new light shone from his son's eyes, blazing hotly. "I thought I wouldn't see you for at least a year!"

"Much has happened, Ada," said Collofin softly, "And I will tell you everything there is to know, but first we need to make sure Thranduil lies down, eats, and then rests."

Erestor wondered about his son's concern for the former King, but didn't mention this, having seen the pitiful state the golden-haired Elf was in. "I will assist you. Glorfindel, can you see to Legolas and his family?"

"Of course." Glorfindel would have preferred to stay with Collofin and Erestor, but knew he had to carry out his duties.

"We will speak later," said Elrond, addressing Thranduil and Legolas. "But first we all need to rest. We will meet again for dinner." After the two Elves had nodded their consent, he allowed Lindir to walk him to their rooms.

Glorfindel waited for Legolas, Haldir, and Remmen to dismount, and whilst the stable hand looked after their horses, he led their guests to the guest wing. Seeing how tired and concerned Legolas looked, he hoped he could lighten the other's mood. "A dear friend of yours has arrived a few days ago, Legolas."

His curiosity piqued, he briefly forget about the troubles that plagued his father. "A dear friend of mine?"

"Gimli," said Glorfindel, chuckling softly. "He will be delighted to find you are here too."

Legolas' features softened remarkably. "I am delighted as well." Remmen gave him a curious glance and Legolas grinned, recalling how Gimli used to fuss over his son. But decades had passed since then. "You do remember him, don't you?"

Remmen nodded once. "I do." He had very fond memories of his favorite 'uncle' and was very much looking forward to speaking with the Dwarf again.

Erestor said nothing, watching Collofin fuss over Thranduil. The former King now rested comfortably on the bed, blankets tucked around him, and Collofin sat at the golden-haired Elf's side, holding and gently stroking his hand. This was most peculiar.

"You should explain," mumbled Thranduil, sleepily, after establishing eye contact with his lover.

Collofin sighed and then lifted wavering eyes to meet Erestor's questioning gaze. "Will you sit with us for a while?"

Erestor pulled up a chair and seated himself to Thranduil's right, opposite his son. "I am listening." He wasn't sure what to make of this situation. The only explanation he could come up with was that his son had fallen in love with Thranduil. But so quickly?

Collofin drew in a deep breath and then blurted out, "Námo allowed my fëa to be reborn into this body. I am Collofin, your son, but I am also Remmen, Thranduil's husband and Legolas' father."

Erestor stared at his son. "What?"

"Námo sent Glorfindel back too! It has happened before!" Collofin desperately hoped to convince Erestor. "My memories returned to me when I saw Thranduil for the fist time."

"He speaks the truth," said Thranduil in a soft tone. "His soul is Remmen's."

Collofin nodded fervently. "Please, Ada, believe me."

"Námo sent you back?" Glorfindel's voice, coming from the doorway took all three of them aback.

Collofin nodded again. "Yes, he sent me back." After giving Thranduil an apologetic look, he released the blond's hand and walked over to Glorfindel. "He told me that I would be reborn at an opportune time. I didn't want to be reborn, knowing Thranduil was perfectly happy with Celeborn, but Námo never listens and did as he pleased. In the end, I consented."

Glorfindel studied Collofin. "You have walked the Halls of Waiting?"

"Yes, I have." Collofin nodded. "And I know Námo cares for us souls. He tried to make us reasonably happy."

Glorfindel licked his lips. "This is hard to believe – to accept."

"But it *is* the truth!" Collofin stared deeply into Glorfindel's eyes. "And I won't be parted from Thranduil ever again!"

Thranduil weakly pushed himself up onto an elbow. "And I refuse to be parted from my husband."

"You should be lying down," said Erestor, gently admonishing Thranduil. The golden-haired Elf lay down again and Erestor tucked the blankets back into place. He had listened and had kept his opinion to himself until now. "I would like some proof."

"Collofin? The portrait." Thranduil pointed his beloved toward his riding cloak.

Collofin grabbed the cloak and quickly located the portrait. "This is Remmen. Thranduil has carried this with him since I died." He showed it to Erestor. Glorfindel quickly joined them to look at the portrait as well. The resemblance was undeniable and Collofin knew it. "I will always be your loving son, but when I am with Thranduil, I am more. My very soul remembers and loves him. And as your son, I will always love and respect you as well." Waiting for them to make up their minds, Collofin involuntarily held his breath.

Erestor frowned deeply, and then decided that if Námo had sent one soul back, he could have sent two back too. And did it even matter? "I love you, my son, and I won't love you any less no matter whose soul is housed in your body." He easily caught Collofin's relieved sigh at those words and he quickly hugged his son.

Glorfindel nodded, absentmindedly hearing Erestor's words as he was still studying the portrait. Námo's ways were impossible to predict and even harder to explain. "Erestor is right; we love you."

Collofin smiled brilliantly at them. "I knew you would believe me and accept this." After hugging them back tightly, he released them and gave them a wicked wink. "You do realize you have gained a son in law?"

Erestor and Glorfindel groaned in unison, "Thranduil."

Celeborn wiped away the single tear that had escaped his eyes. "Thank you for letting me witness this moment in time." Námo had taken him to Imladris; into Remmen's rooms to be exact. They had watched the reunion and both were certain Thranduil had found a new home here. Thranduil would be cared for and that was all that mattered to Celeborn.

"But we cannot linger here." Námo extended an arm and offered Celeborn his hand. "Come, we need to return to my Halls."

"But… Can we visit with them again in time?" Celeborn looked at them longingly. In life these Elves had meant a lot to him!

Námo nodded once in understanding. "We can visit regularly, but we need to remain hidden from their view. Do you understand and accept that?"

"I do." Celeborn curled his fingers around Námo's, realizing he had found another, a different kind of love in death. And perhaps, he had found his destiny and eternal love as well.

"Legolas!" Gimli approached his old friend and was deeply touched when Legolas sat on his heels to allow him a proper embrace. At times, being the short one was awkward. "I missed you, laddie!"

"And I missed you, Gimli." Legolas placed a chaste kiss on Gimli's brow. "You remember Remmen, don't you?" He rose from the floor and presented his son to Gimli.

"It has been decades, but I remember. It has been too long." Feeling a bit shy around the younger Elf, Gimli waited for Remmen to take the initiative.

Remmen mimicked his father's moves and went down onto his knees to warmly hug Gimli. "You always were my favorite 'uncle' and I am delighted to see you again. You are right; it has been much too long since we last met." He gave Gimli a blinding smile.

Gimli, flattered by the warm welcome, guided his friends over to the fire, where they sat down in comfortable chairs. "You are probably wondering what brings me here."

Legolas nodded, but waited patiently for Gimli to continue.

"Lord Elrond invited me to stay in Imladris and I complied." Gimli looked at Legolas from beneath bushy eyebrows. "He also offered me passage on the last ship that will leave for Valinor after Aragorn's…death." That last word left his lips quite uncomfortably.

"That is partly my doing. I sent Elrond a letter last winter," explained Legolas, "After Aragorn's death we will be the last remaining members of the Fellowship and I can't possibly leave you behind." Legolas sighed, deeply. "It looks as if Haldir and I will settle down in Imladris as well. When the time comes, we will all leave together and we will stand side by side, as in the old days, my truest friend."

A lump of emotions had formed in Gimli's throat. "I would like that very much."

"Me too," whispered Legolas, placing his hand atop Gimli's. "We will sail for Valinor together. All of us."

"How do you fare, meleth?" Collofin had settled comfortably on the bed, carefully eyeing Thranduil whilst the golden-haired Elf ate dinner. They had excused themselves for the evening, preferring to spend some time together now they had some privacy.

"Better." Thranduil had eaten almost everything on his plate and smiled, seeing Collofin's pleased look. Raising a hand, he gently caressed the other Elf's face. "I feel like I have been given another chance."

Collofin smiled warmly. "Yes?"

"I… I never thought you would return to me and yet you did. I can even accept that Celeborn doesn't blame me for his death, because he said so himself, but… there is still one thing that weighs heavily on my mind." Thranduil's eyes darkened with still unshed tears.

"Losing your unborn child," whispered Collofin softly, knowing his beloved so very well.

Thranduil nodded, and he let go of the multitude of tears that now glided down his cheeks. "I should have known something would go wrong. I shouldn't have tried again."

Collofin rocked Thranduil gently. "You have to let go of your guilt, meleth. It wasn't your fault that you lost the child."

"I should never have tried to bear another child!" Tears now flowed down his cheeks in earnest and the salty drops slid from his chin to land on the blankets.

"You tried because you loved Celeborn and you wanted to give him a child. You are a caring and loving Elf, meleth, and you aren't to blame." Opting for action instead of words that wouldn't truly register with Thranduil, Collofin gently claimed his lover's trembling lips. Ever so softly, he deepened the kiss, sliding closer until he eventually straddled his lover's hips. Thranduil was growing erect beneath him and Collofin smiled knowingly, running his hands through his lover's golden mane. "Oh, how I love you. I never stopped loving you. Not even when I was in the Halls of Waiting. You were always on my mind, meleth. And you always will be. My love for you is eternal."

The falling of tears slowed down, until the flow stopped completely. Looking into his lover's eyes, Thranduil raised his hands and placed them on either side of Collofin's face. "How I love you, Remmen. I was desperate when I tried to enter the Halls of Waiting. If only Námo had let me we would have been reunited in death."

"But it wasn't your time, meleth. Legolas needed you." Collofin leaned into the caress, slowly rubbing his face against the palm of Thranduil's hand. "And now I need you. I always needed you." When he looked into Thranduil's emerald eyes again, his own held a very important and obvious question. "Do you need me too?"

"In *that* way?" whispered Thranduil in a breathless voice, "Always. But I never thought this day would ever come again."

"Let me make sweet love to you, meleth, and give both of us what we need." Collofin leaned in closer to shower Thranduil's smiling face with butterfly kisses. "I love you so much…"

Thranduil briefly closed his eyes so his ears would hear all dimensions to his lover's declaration. "Have me in whatever way you desire, Remmen."

Collofin had already begun to undo the buttons to Thranduil's shirt and slowly pushed the fabric aside, revealing his lover's naked torso to him. Gently, his fingertips touched the scar, left behind by recent surgery. "You would have loved this little one to death, meleth."

A sad, rueful smile appeared on Thranduil's face as he finally accepted the loss. "I would have." His heart missed a beat when Collofin's lips gently brushed along the scar. His erection strained against the fabric of his leggings, and he threw back his head, burrowing his fingers in the fabric of the sheet.

Collofin saw the familiar surrender and placed a tender and passionate kiss onto his lover's belly button. He would never betray the trust Thranduil placed in him. Quickly, he removed his own shirt and then lowered himself so their naked skin made contact.

Thranduil's eyes opened and rapture shone from them. He ran his long fingers down his lover's back, enjoying the sensation of soft skin beneath his fingertips. "More," he panted, softly.

Eager to oblige his lover, Collofin undid the lacing of Thranduil's leggings and freed the other Elf's hard flesh. Running his thumb along the slit, he savored the soft, satin like feel of the warm, twitching flesh in his hands. A smile curled the corners of his mouth at the familiar sensation.

In the meantime, Thranduil had managed to slide Collofin's leggings down the narrow hips, and he now curled his fingers around his beloved's shaft, stroking gently. Collofin suddenly dived back to his lips, taking them in a possessive kiss and he arched his back in want. "Pl—"

But Collofin stopped him. "No, I don't want you to beg. I never did." Looking into his lover's dilated pupils, he nodded once, and then moved down Thranduil's body until he was in a comfortable position to take his lover's length into his mouth. He placed one hand on Thranduil's hip, trying to control his lover's frantic thrusts, which would shortly follow and with his other hand he rubbed the velvet like scrotum, manipulating the testes until Thranduil was moaning needily.

Thranduil never took his eyes off of his lover and his heart missed a beat when those soft lips closed over his hard flesh. The gentle sucking sensation quickly deepened and he thrust involuntarily. When Collofin released him and softly blew against the tip of his enflamed flesh, he thought he would come that instant, but a sharp squeeze at the base of his erection stopped him from finding release. "Oh, you know me so well."

Collofin smiled. "Yes, I know you and the way your body reacts." Dividing beads of pre-ejaculate over the head of Thranduil's shaft, he wickedly licked his lips. It only took him one moment to lose his leggings and to position himself for impalement. "I want you inside of me, meleth." Thranduil's hungry look told him everything he needed to know and he slowly sat down, taking in inch after inch until Thranduil was completely sheathed inside him. Wriggling slightly, he quickly became accustomed to the invasive feeling and craved motion. But his lover's dazed expression told him he had surprised the blond after all. "Why? You know that I love taking myself."

"It has been so long," mumbled Thranduil, already in the throes of impending release. "Oh, I won't last long, meleth."

"You don't have to," whispered Collofin, once more claiming Thranduil's lips. "We have the rest of our lives to make love. We need release and confirmation of our bond."

"Our bond will slam firmly into place," panted Thranduil, as Collofin clenched his inner muscle around his length. "Oh, I…" Remmen knew him so well. Knew what that particular move did to him. "Again…"

Collofin indulged his lover and a mist of memories flowed into his mind, causing him to relive all those times they had made love. Staring deeply into Thranduil's eyes, he finally began to move, rocking atop of his lover, effectively bringing both of them to orgasm.

Thranduil quickly brought up his arms behind Collofin's back to steady him. Pulling him close, he kissed his lover passionately, thrusting into the tight glove that welcomed him again after so many millennia of separation.

The moment of release caused their hearts to stop momentarily and when they began to beat again, they beat in unison, possessing one beat, having one rhythm. Thranduil spent himself inside his lover's body, and involuntarily bit Collofin's bottom lip, drawing a few droplets of blood. But Collofin never noticed the bite. What he did notice was the bond slamming into place as Thranduil had predicted it would. Their souls merged and caressed each other, slowly spinning closer until they were so tightly tangled that they became one. Neither of them could tell where one ended and the other began.

Exhausted, but blissfully happy, Collofin collapsed atop of Thranduil, relishing feeling his beloved's arms around him – holding him possessively. "Oh my…"

Thranduil didn't let him finish. "It is done. We are bound once more."

Collofin grinned wickedly. "Oh, I missed making love to you!" Chuckling, he began to tickle Thranduil's sides, knowing very well how ticklish the other Elf was.

"Stop… doing… that…Ah! Ha! Haha!" Thranduil was shaking with laughter and retaliated in a similar way. Within seconds they were both giggling and pleading for mercy. The days of old, which had been filled with mirth and merriment had finally returned.

Behind Emerald Eyes

Part 24

In the corridor, Legolas' hand remained poised in mid-air. He had wanted to knock on the door to his father's rooms, but now refrained from doing so at hearing the giggling and chuckles coming from within. His gaze sought out Haldir's. They had come here to check on Thranduil, but now realized someone else was already doing a perfect job at cheering up the former King.

"Mercy!" sounded Thranduil's voice, between chuckles and swallowed laughter.

"Only if… hahahaha, if you stop…. First!" Collofin's warm, sparkling voice echoed through the room and easily reached the corridor.

Legolas smiled contently at Haldir. "It seems my father has finally found happiness."

"And we will guard it well." Haldir folded an arm around his husband, kissed Legolas, and they exited the corridor, not intruding on the privacy of the lovers of old.

A weak blush crept across Celeborn's face and he quickly averted his eyes at seeing such an intimate scene. Námo had allowed him this moment in time to convince himself that Thranduil would be fine in the end. "He is really happy, having Remmen back at his side."

Námo extinguished the vision before them and then nodded, thoughtfully. "Thranduil still has to go through the mourning process for losing his unborn child, but Collofin will remain at his side and help him accept the inevitable."

Celeborn's eyes darkened. "It was my child too."

Námo's compassionate eyes met Celeborn's. "Your son's fëa has already found a new host. He will be born in ten months and all will be well. I removed any unpleasant memories from his soul."

"Was it my fault? I kept trying to convince Thranduil to—"

Námo covered the distance between them and placed a hand on the silver-haired Elf's shoulder. After establishing eye contact he said, "Thranduil's body is no longer able to carry a child to term. When Legolas was born, too much damage was done. The injuries were too extensive. Remmen knew this and therefore never asked Thranduil to give him another child." Seeing Celeborn's puzzled look, he answered the unspoken question. "Did Thranduil know? He suspected the pregnancy could go wrong, but he loved you enough to try."

The Vala's soft fingers caressed Celeborn's face and then slid to the back of the Elf's head, burying themselves in the long, silver hair. "My hands were bound. I knew what was about to happen, but couldn't change anything."

The loss of life reminded Celeborn just how precious life in general was – and love. Taking a step closer to Námo, he leaned into the touch and stared at the Vala, hoping Námo understood.

"You want me," whispered the white-haired Vala, "Now?"

"Now." Celeborn opted for a direct and slightly aggressive approach, knowing Námo could easily put him into his place if he overstepped any boundaries. Roughly claiming Námo's lips, he buried the Vala in a tight hug and pushed him against the wall. A deep sigh, which hopefully indicated contentment, left Námo's lips, and encouraged Celeborn to continue his sensual attack. One hand moved to undo the buttons of Námo's robes, and the heavy, velvet fabric slid onto the floor, leaving Námo standing naked in front of him. Although he had seen the perfect body before, he almost drooled at the magnificent sight. "What is your desire? Tell me what you want."

Finding it hard to concentrate on speech whilst Celeborn's hand was slipping down to cup his testes, Námo stared wide-eyed at the bold Elf. No one would ever dare to approach him in this manner, or treat him thusly. Oh, he loved Celeborn even more for doing this to him. "Take me…"

A wicked grin surfaced on Celeborn's face. "Did I hear correctly?"

"Possess me… Make me yours." He hung helplessly in Celeborn's arms with his back pressed against the wall, for which he now felt grateful, as it lent him all the support he needed. Oh, he knew that he could stop Celeborn with one word of power, with one mighty shove, but that wasn't what he wanted. He craved giving up control after all these ages of responsibility. For just one moment he wanted to be taken care of.

Celeborn mischievously licked his lips. His instincts told him that this wouldn't entail any slow or sweet love making; this would be hard and fast because Name needed this so badly. Who was he trying to fool? They both needed this badly!

Keeping the Vala pinned with one arm against the wall, he removed his own shirt, and then did away with his leggings as well. As they were both naked now, they eyed one another hungrily. Long, white hair danced against Námo's hips, and the small number of blue and mithril strands seemed to deepen in color against the white wall. /A Vala, I am about to claim a Vala as my own./

Throwing caution to the wind, Celeborn brutally continued the attack on Námo's already bruised lips. Whilst keeping Námo occupied in this way, he lifted the Vala and guided the long, strong legs around his waist. "Wrap your arms around me." Panting softly, he stared into lust-possessed pupils of the deepest blue – near black. The Vala was beautiful in his need and Celeborn's desire to please Námo almost made him act rashly; his only desire was to bury himself in the welcoming body. But no, he needed to do this properly. Námo being this eager was no excuse for him to become an inattentive lover.

Now that his greatest wish was about to be granted, Námo felt the first twinges of nervousness in the pit of his stomach. Although he was hard and needy, he had dreamt of this for so long that he had a hard time believing it was actually happening. "I have longed for this for so long. And now you are mine." Wrapping arms and legs tightly around Celeborn's frame, he allowed the other to take the lead. One of Celeborn's hands slipped beneath his bottom, massaging the mounds of soft flesh and occasionally rubbing between the cheeks.

"Do we require oil?" asked Celeborn. As this was the Vala's first time he wanted to please his lover in all possible ways and to proceed with caution.

"No, you won't hurt me. You couldn't hurt me even if you tried." Námo blushed weakly. "That is the way of the Valar." He rested his head against Celeborn's shoulder and licked the skin of his lover's throat, still tasting the memory of salt that lingered there. "There is no need to bother with oil. I am more than ready for you."

A predatory growl escaped from the back of Celeborn's throat, and his sparkling eyes met Námo's. "Now, then?"

"Yes, now." Námo bit his bottom lip in anticipation. Although he knew there wouldn't be any pain, he wasn't completely sure what to expect. Once more burying his head against Celeborn's surprisingly muscular shoulder, his lips sucked the soft, salty skin once more. He wanted to mark his lover, leave a passion mark on him for all to see.

Celeborn took himself in hand and positioned himself at the entrance to Námo's body. A part of him found it hard to believe he was about to take the Vala, but another reveled in it. Thrusting upward, he began to inch inside. Slowly at first, but when no sounds of pain or discomfort left Námo's lips, he plunged the last bit in.

"Oh…" Námo threw back his head and rested it against the wall so he could stare into Celeborn's eyes. He felt full – surprisingly full - and there was something else as well. A sense of surrender, love, and well-being he had never experienced before. Keeping a tight hold on his lover's body, he swallowed hard, trying to rid himself of the lump of emotions in his throat. He tried to prepare himself for that first thrust that would follow shortly, but when it came he was still taken by surprise as little tremors of pleasure erupted from his lower body. "Oh, yessss," he purred in delight.

Celeborn never took his eyes off of the beautiful creature sensually wrapped around him. He set a hard, but agonizingly slow rhythm and kept them on edge for long moments. Námo was tight, and involuntarily clenching his inner muscle around his length, almost making him come. Only discipline and self control kept Celeborn from finding release too quickly. Reaching between them, he curled his fingers around Námo's weeping flesh and stroked his lover demandingly.

Námo released soft mews, moaned as the sensation overwhelmed him and released a sharp yelp when he finally found release. He tightened his hold on Celeborn, trembling from emotion.

Celeborn's brow was knitted in concentration, but when the hot cream dripped down his fingers he knew the time had come to let go. The first contraction pushed him over the edge and he finally found release inside his lover's welcoming body. Instinctively, he hugged Námo close to him and when orgasm coursed through him, he slowly went down onto his knees, taking the Vala down with him. With his last strength, he lowered Námo onto the floor so his lover now rested on his back, long legs still wrapped around him. He rested his body atop of the Vala's and surrendered to the ecstasy washing over him. The sensation was so much more intense than it had ever been and it simply took his breath away. "Oh, melethen."

Námo smiled brilliantly. "I have waited so long for you to call me that."

Both slowly came down from their sensual high, but limbs remained entangled and their lips found each other once more. "I think I love you," whispered Celeborn in a moment of truth. "When did that happen?"

"For me it happened many millennia ago, when you were born and I saw the potential you carried," explained Námo, smiling warmly. "I promise you that you will be happy here."

Celeborn silenced his lover by lazily kissing swollen lips. Oh, he was certain he would be happy here, because he already *was* happy here. With Námo at his side as his lover, what more was there to wish for?

Epilogue

"You are nervous, my beloved." Lindir studied Elrond closely and caught the slight nervous twitch that always gave the half-Elf away when he felt nervous or upset.

Elrond sighed deeply. "I cannot possibly hide my feelings for you. I would never attempt to, and yes, you are right. I *am* nervous. How will Celebrían react upon our arrival?"

Erestor, who had overheard their conversation, moved closer to Elrond and rested a hand on the half-Elf's shoulder. "Don't you think she already knows? Do you really think Galadriel and Elladan didn't tell her?" Although he had hoped for his words to comfort and reassure Elrond, his friend grew pale instead.

"Do you really think they told her? But then she already knows!" Elrond fought down his panic. "How will she react? What will she say?"

Glorfindel appeared behind Elrond and whispered into his friend's ear, "She set you free to love again when she left, so why are you worried? Do you really think she would begrudge you Lindir's love?"

"I don't know," mumbled Elrond, leaning heavily on Lindir, tightly entangling their fingers. "I don't know what to expect." He held his breath involuntarily, as his Elven sight made out his wife's form on the white shores of Valinor. Galadriel was at her side, and so were Elladan and Orophin. Rumil and Mithrandir had also come to greet them and his nervousness increased at seeing the expectant look on Celebrían's face. "I don't know what to do… How to act."

"Just be yourself and trust in her to understand," advised Erestor, who eagerly gave in when Glorfindel claimed his hand.

Cirdan brought this last ship home safely and then waited for the first ones to disembark. Legolas took his husband's hand in his right and then collected Gimli's in his left. With Remmen walking behind them, they finally stepped onto the sacred shores. Rumil and Orophin greeted them enthusiastically and hugged their brother close.

Next to depart from the ship were Collofin and Thranduil. After greeting the Elves from Mirkwood that had traveled to the Undying Lands before them, they joined Legolas, Haldir, Remmen and Gimli. The six of them would live in two separate houses, which allowed Collofin and Thranduil some privacy, for which all involved were grateful.

Rumil and Orophin knew they would shortly meet with Haldir again, so they stepped aside and let the new arrivals head for their home to settle down comfortably.

Elrohir and Magolion stepped onto the shores next, and Elladan found it impossible to stand quietly at his mother's side any longer. "Oh, brother, you are finally here! I have missed you!" Elladan grabbed hold of Elrohir and crushed him to his chest. "Never do this to me again! From now on, we shall always be together!"

Elrohir smiled and chuckled at his brother's enthusiasm. "Always together, yes," he promised. But then his gaze met Celebrían's and he felt weak in the knees at being seeing his mother again. She looked radiant and long gone was the haunted look she had possessed before sailing for Valinor. Her long hair shone silver and her eyes were open and warm. When she opened her arms, he flung himself into them, hugging her tightly. "Nana… I love you."

Celebrían smiled; delighted to be reunited with her youngest son. When Elladan had arrived she had refused to let him out of her sight for days and now that Elrohir was here too, she went through the same emotions. She needed him close, needed to feel his arms around her frame. "I love you too, pen-neth, and I am delighted to hold you in my arms again." Having her sons close didn't lessen the pain she felt at knowing Arwen's fate, but they would support her and help her accept her daughter's choice eventually.

"You look well," said Elrohir, relieved that his mother had blossomed here in Valinor.

"That is because I am happy." Finding that Elrond and Lindir were disembarking as well, she placed a kiss on Elrohir's brow and then faced her husband and his lover. "Elrond… Lindir."

Elrond was speechless. Celebrían looked radiant. She had looked like this when he had first fallen in love with her. The stains her ordeal with the Orcs had left upon her had vanished and she was whole once more. "I don't know what to say," he admitted in the end, painfully aware of the fact that he continued to clutch Lindir's hand for support.

"Then let me say it for you," said Celebrían kindly, "My mother already told me that you found new love with Lindir and my heart rejoices for you."

Elrond held his breath, staring at her in disbelief. "You accept this?"

"Of course I do. We set each other free, didn't we?" A shy blush appeared on her features. "And I have to make an admission of my own." Celebrían looked behind her and a tall Elf with long, dark-blond hair left the shadows of the ancient trees of Valinor. "I found love here on these shores. When I arrived, I was still hurting and Sildil helped me heal. We have to come to love one another." She placed her hand in Sildil's, who immediately caressed the soft skin.

"My Lord Elrond," said Sildil in greeting, loyally standing at Celebrían's side. Surely the half-Elf wouldn't begrudge his former wife a new love? 

Elrond unexpectedly burst out into chuckling. "It seems we both found a new love then!" And he had been so nervous during the journey here!

Celebrían smiled warmly and leaned in closer when Sildil folded an arm around her waist. "Yes, it seems the Valar were kind to us, allowing both of us a new chance at love and happiness."

Elrond gave his former wife an adoring smile. "You speak kind and wise words."

Celebrían nodded once and then looked at Lindir. "I am glad to know that you and Elrond are here. Valinor is a place of peace and bliss and I am certain we will all be very happy here."

Lindir released a relieved sigh. "Thank you, Milady."

"And now, come with us." She turned around, gently pulling Sildil along with her. "Let me show you to your new home and tonight we will eat and drink, and speak of old times."

Galadriel watched them go. Celebrían and Sildil leading the way, followed by Elrond and Lindir, who were obviously very relieved at having been so warmly welcomed. Elladan and Elrohir followed, arm in arm, talking and chuckling, whilst Orophin and Magolion reacquainted themselves. To her right she heard yelps of delight when Erestor and Mithrandir were reunited. Father and son hugged and immediately began to inform the other about recent events. Glorfindel patiently stood at Erestor's side, and when the golden-haired Elf felt her gaze on him, he gave her a doting smile.

Galadriel nodded once and followed when the three of them began to walk. She had been reunited with friends and loved ones, and Valinor would be their home for all eternity. /Celeborn, my love, I hope you are content as well./ Not expecting an answer she froze in her tracks, hearing his voice in her mind.

/More than just content. I have had my share of good fortune as well, my dearest Galadriel./

Sighing blissfully, she continued down the path to join the others again.

Celeborn watched her walk away, in that floating manner of hers. A part of him would always love and adore her, and he was thankful that Námo had brought them here to witness this reunion. Hidden away from their view, Námo and he had watched them.

"Your scheming worked," said Celeborn, looking into his lover's soft blue eyes.

"I am Námo," he said, "Doomsman of the Valar, and I know all that is going to happen, except what lies in the will of Eru Iluvatar. I already knew the outcome when I set everything into motion, my beloved Celeborn."

Celeborn chuckled, swept aside the long, white hair, and pressed a kiss onto the sensitive skin of his lover's neck. "I will never underestimate you again. Everyone is happy."

Námo cheekily eyed Celeborn. "You know… there is something that would make me even happier."

Celeborn raised an eyebrow, pretending he didn't know what was coming. "And what might that be?"

"Let me ravish you…" said Námo, purring like a predatory cat.

Celeborn licked and nibbled Námo's throat, leaving tiny marks on the perfect skin. "That can be arranged."

On waves of chuckling and purrs, the two forms faded away, leaving behind a peaceful shore.

THE END

Notes;

LOML, Interlude and BEE were beta read by Sulien.

Sildil originates from the EOAS tagboard, and the name is used with permission.

I know I didn't include either Aragon's death or Arwen's, but I decided there had been enough depressing things in this story and opted for some happiness instead.

Thank you for anyr fb on this story


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